Can Love Survive
by drtammy1511
Summary: Sequel to In the Long Run.  E/B are now seniors in high school.  After surviving accusations of rape and Jessica's attempted murder, things should be smooth sailing, but teens trying to be adults don't always have it that easy.  AH/cannon couples
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer – All things Twilight belong to Stephenie Meyers. No copyright infringement is intended.

A huge thanks to my wonderful Beta, shelikesthesound.

Can Love Survive

Chapter 1

Ungh, Freshmen

BPOV

Senior year had finally arrived. Edward had been attending football practices for the past month, and that morning was no exception. He'd gotten up at four thirty a.m. to be at practice at five o'clock every morning for the past month, not getting home until after noon. Earlier, his dad, Carlisle, picked him up on his way to the hospital and dropped him off at school so I would have the car. I missed our usual routine on school mornings of showering together, then getting ready and eating together. As I got ready alone, I reminded myself to get him some breakfast bars to eat before school started. I also made sure to grab two waters and some lemonade mix.

When I arrived at the parking lot, I pulled into our usual parking space. I gathered both of our backpacks and his breakfast, walking to where several girls had already gathered to catch a glimpse of the football players as they came from the locker room. I met up with Alice, my best girlfriend for the past eleven years, and gave her a hug.

"Hey, Bella. Looks like there's a lot of newbies here this year," Alice said as she gave me a hug. "The guys haven't come out, yet."

"They sure do look young, don't they?" I said, waving at all of the freshmen girls who were jumping up and down as the door to the field house opened and several of the football players came out.

"Yeah, they do. I miss Rose. I hope she is having fun at UW."

"I'm sure she and Emmett are having loads of fun. He's still up for first string. I think he'll be playing offensive lineman, though. He said he's too little to be center up there."

"I want that one. The one with the sexy, bronze hair that just came out," one of the freshmen girls said.

"Oooh, yeah, he's hot. I wonder who he is?" her friend said. I looked up and leaned over, tapping the first girl on the shoulder.

"You're talking about the quarterback of the team, Edward Cullen. You think he's cute?" I said.

"Yeah, he's dreamy. I'd like to sink my teeth into him," the first girl said.

"Well, I hate to tell you this, but he's off limits. He's mine," I said as Edward walked up and kissed me. "Here you are, baby," I said as I handed him his breakfast bar and his lemonade.

"Thanks, sweetheart. I'm starving," Edward said, biting off half of the breakfast bar in one bite and gulping down half of his drink in one swig. "How are you this morning? You were sleeping really well when I left."

"I'm good. No problems. We'd better hurry though. We're gonna be late for homeroom." He took both bookbags off of my shoulders and put them on his, and, after taking my hand in his, we walked towards the cafeteria where the seniors had homeroom.

When we entered the cafeteria, we blended in with the rest of the senior class. Mr. Green was in the front of the room, trying to get everyone's attention, but no one was listening. Finally, Mr. Thompson whistled, and the room got quiet.

"Welcome to Fork High School's Senior Class of 2004. I know this is going to be a wonderful year to be a senior. I want to remind you that your senior projects are due in May. You must complete your senior project to graduate. Also, I want to remind you to check with Mr. Williams, the school counselor, if you have any questions about your classes. I don't want anyone to make it to next semester and realize that they need only one more required class to graduate. Finally, if you plan to drive to school, you will need a parking permit before the day is out. I am now going to turn you over to your Senior Class Sponsors," Mr. Green said.

Mr. Thompson stood again and faced the crowd. "If your last names begin with A through E, please come with me. Your area will be the first two rows of tables against the far walls. Please move quietly. We have a lot to get accomplished this morning."

Alice, Edward, and I gathered our bags and moved towards the tables he mentioned. We had all been in the same homerooms since kindergarten when our fathers started making donations to the school to make sure we were all together. That year would be the first year Jasper wouldn't be with us because his last name was Hale.

First, Mr. Thompson handed out our schedules. Edward and I had the same schedules. We had AP Calculus first period. It was good, because I liked to have math in the morning to get it out of the way. Second period was AP Biology. Third period was Government, and it was a required class for seniors. It was only one semester long, and next semester, we would have economics. Fourth period was AP English, and then we went to lunch. Fifth period was Spanish, sixth period was AP Chemistry, and seventh period was football for Edward and cheerleading for me. The schedule ended up being perfect.

Next, Mr. Thompson assigned lockers, and finally, he assigned parking permits. The lockers cost twenty dollars each, and the parking permit ended up being twenty dollars, as well. Edward made his way to the front of the line and paid our sixty dollars in cash. Mr. Thompson was somewhat shocked we would have the money, being a young married couple and all.

"It's okay, Mr. Thompson. We have the money. It's no big deal," Edward reassured him. Mr. Thompson nodded, wrote the receipt, and told Edward to make sure he hung onto it. Edward nodded and assured him he would.

By the time Edward returned to our table, it was time for first period. Mrs. Sims would be teaching us again, and we loved her to death. There weren't many people taking AP Calculus, so she passed out our books and told us to write our names in them ourselves. Then, when she called our names, she wrote down the numbers from the books in her grade book. We finished early enough that she was able to teach the first lesson and assign homework. Senior year was starting off with a bang.

The same thing happened in AP Biology. Mrs. Briggs was able to lecture for most of the hour, and I took ten pages of notes. When the bell rang for morning break, I was never so relieved. My hand was actually hurting. Alice wasn't taking AP Biology with us; she didn't like to dissect things, so when we went to our usual place at break, she and Jasper were already waiting on us. The only problem was they were surrounded by the same freshmen from that morning.

"Is it hard to play football?" one of them asked.

"No, not really," Jasper said, pulling Alice closer into his body.

"I can't wait 'till the game Friday night! What position do you play?" another one asked.

"He plays wide receiver. Do you even know what position that is?" Alice answered, not hiding her annoyance.

"Oooh, here is the other one. You're the quarterback, aren't you? That makes you in charge of the game, doesn't it?" the first one said.

I took Edward's hand and pulled him over to where Alice and Jasper were standing. We turned away from the other girls, and I asked Alice and Jasper, "How did your class go?"

"Pretty good. We didn't do anything. Just got our books. How 'bout yours?" Alice said.

"We got an hour's worth of lecture. My hand is hurting. Why are these newbies still here?"

"Don't know, but they're trying my patience," Alice said.

"Come on, girls. They're just trying to learn the game," Jasper said, laughing. Alice promptly hit him on the arm.

"Then they can come to the game and watch it like the rest of us. You two are obviously taken," Alice said.

"Don't be jealous, sweetheart. You know I only have eyes for you," Jasper said.

"Yeah, I remember. I just have two words to say to you, Jasper. Football Camp," Alice said. Jasper had cheated on her two years earlier while he was at football camp during the summer, and Alice was never one to forget or withhold throwing low blows.

"Alice, that was two summers ago. Please, let sleeping dogs lie," Jasper said, pulling her even closer to him and kissing her on the neck. "You know I love you."

"Okay, girls," I said to the two girls who were still gathered around the guys. "It's time for you two to scatter. You are not wanted here. You are butting into our private time with our guys. Please, leave. Find somewhere else to have your break. This is senior territory."

"Did you see where he had his hand?" the first girl said to the second girl as they were walking away. "It was practically down her skirt. I bet she puts out. I bet that's why he's with her." I laughed at her remark. It was true, though. Edward did have his fingers under the waistband of my skirt. In fact, they were under the waistband of my panties, as well, but no one besides me knew that. We spent the rest of morning break talking about our classes.

As we were going back inside after the bell rang, signaling the end of break, Cherish, one of the other cheerleaders, came up to Edward and me at our lockers and said, "Bella, I just thought you should know, some freshmen girls are asking around about you and Edward."

"What are they asking?" I asked her.

"How long you've been together, if people think you're putting out, things like that. I overheard her talking to Tanya. I don't know what their problem is, but I'd watch out," Cherish said.

"Okay, thanks for the information," I said. After Cherish walked away, I turned to Edward, and he looked at me.

"They can't hurt us. Everybody knows we're married. Maybe we should've told them ourselves, rather than just said we're together. I don't know why it's any of their business, though," he said.

"But Tanya will tell them about Jessica and Victoria, and I really don't want any of that to come back up. Jessica is in jail and will be for the next fifty years, at least. Victoria is gone, and I don't want to relive burying her again. It was hard enough the first time, and I'm not over it. I lost my daughter once, and I don't want to feel like I'm losing her again," I said, falling into Edward's arms.

"I know. I know you cry yourself to sleep every night. I know you try to keep it quiet, not to let me know, but I do know. I know you better than you know yourself, Bella, and I don't want to rehash Victoria's murder again. Jessica killed our daughter when she pushed you down the stairs, and I'm not over it either, but we have to go on…one day at a time."

"Let's get to class before we're late. Maybe nothing will come of it," I said, wiping the stray tear from my cheek.

"Yeah, maybe," Edward said, taking my hand and leading me to Mr. Thompson's Government class. He spent the entire class period passing out textbooks and assigned the first section to read for homework. The next class was Mrs. Ammon's AP English class. Neither of us paid a lot of attention during class, and we were lucky that Mrs. Ammon decided to give us a summary of how her class would be organized for the year. We would be starting with short stories, then we would move on to novels, then we would work on plays, and finally, we would finish the year with poetry. She assigned us a short story to read and questions at the end to answer for homework.

By the time we made it to the cafeteria, Alice and Jasper had already claimed our regular table. We were surrounded by football players at the nearby tables, the area traditionally belonging to the football team and their girlfriends. That just made it the hot area for the football chasers to be hanging around, and our two stalkers were right in the middle of it. Luckily, they hadn't spotted Jasper, yet. Edward and I made our way through the crowd to our spots and sat down with Alice and Jasper. I was still upset from thinking about our stillborn daughter and didn't take part in the conversation the others were having when Alice reached across the table and took my hand in hers.

"Why are you so down, Bella?" she asked.

"Just thinking about Victoria," I said. "I'm sorry. I can't get her off of my mind."

"What happened?" she asked.

"Cherish said she saw one of the newbies talking to Tanya about Edward and me. It made me think about Jessica and everything that happened sophomore year. I haven't been able to get it out of my thoughts."

"Well, Jessica isn't coming back. She was convicted of murdering Victoria, and she will be in prison for a long time. She can't hurt you guys any more."

"I know, but I still grieve for Victoria. We were supposed to have a one and a half year old by now."

"I know. Have you guys talked about trying again?"

"Yeah, we've talked about it. We don't know when we want to try again, not anytime soon, though. We'd like to get through college first."

"Yeah, and our schedules are pretty tough this year. I don't think that we want two a.m. feedings while we're taking four AP courses. We're both still in the running for valedictorian, and we don't need that kind of stress added to our plates," Edward said.

Just then, the two freshmen found our table. "Hi, again," the first one said as she slid into the seat next to Alice. "We've been looking for you two."

"Yeah, we thought for a little bit that you didn't come to lunch," the second one said as she sat down next to me.

"What are your names?" Edward asked.

"I'm Jill, and this is Amanda," said the first girl, "and you're Edward, right?"

"Look Jill. I don't mean to be rude, but the girls have been pretty plain today. Jasper is with Alice. They are engaged, and I'm with Bella. We are married. Neither of us is interested in getting to know either of you. Now, please leave us alone," Edward said.

"We know that you are married. We asked around about you, and several people said you were married, but one person told us why. She tricked you into getting her pregnant and then conveniently fell down the stairs and lost the baby after you had already married her out of obligation. You don't have to be with her anymore. There is no baby," Jill said.

I was shocked by what she said, and when the horror of it hit me, it took my breath away. I sucked back a sob as Edward jumped up from his chair and threw it backwards. He was trying to get around me and Amanda to confront Jill when he was slammed into the table by two of his defensive linemen.

"Woah, Cullen. Calm down. What's up, man?" Thomas asked.

"Let me go. I'm gonna kill her!" Edward said.

"Break it up! I said, 'Break it up!'" Mrs. Ammon said, coming between Thomas, Anthony, and Edward. The two let go of Edward who stood up and clenched his fists. "What is going on here?" Mrs. Ammon asked, looking at the three of them.

"Nothing, Mrs. Ammon. Nothing at all," Edward said, his teeth clenched.

"Nothing, Mrs. Ammon," Thomas said.

"Nothing, Mrs. Ammon," Anthony said.

"That's not what I saw. I saw the two of you holding Edward down on that table. Now I'm only going to ask one more time, what is going on?" There was a crowd surrounding our table.

"It was my fault, Mrs. Ammon," Edward said. "They were just holding me back."

"Holding you back? From what, Edward? This is not like you. Everyone back in your seats. Thomas, Anthony, take your seats," Mrs. Ammon said.

"Yes, ma'am," both Thomas and Anthony said, and they returned to the table behind us.

"Edward, I'm waiting for an answer," Mrs. Ammon said.

"I lost control. I'm sorry, Mrs. Ammon," Edward said.

"You lost control? After everything you've been through, you've never lost control. What happened to make you lose control?" Mrs. Ammon asked.

"This, this, freshman accused Bella of losing Victoria on purpose. She, she, she, basically said that our marriage is a sham and suggested that I step out on Bella," Edward said, his fists opening and closing.

"I see. Don't you think you could have thought of a better way of handling this situation, Edward?" Mrs. Ammon asked. "I would think that you would be more worried about your wife who is crying and looks like her world is over than about taking it out on a naïve freshman who didn't even know who you were two years ago."

Edward turned and looked at me. He sat down beside me. "Bella, are you okay?" Edward asked me. I shook my head, and he took me into his arms. "Bella, you didn't do anything to hurt Victoria. That's why Jessica is in jail, sweetheart. She murdered our baby. We're in love with each other. Don't listen to her." I nodded and dropped my head onto his shoulder. He wiped my tears from my face.

"Edward, you know you're going to have to go to see Mr. Green, don't you?" Mrs. Ammon asked.

"No, please, Mrs. Ammon," I begged. "You know he hates Edward. It won't be good. Please, just let it slide."

"No, Bella. I lost control. I have to accept the consequences for my actions. I'll be back. I love you," Edward said, and he leaned over and kissed me on the lips, much deeper than he should have.

"That's a freebie, Edward. No more PDA's in school. You two know the rules," Mrs. Ammon said.

"Yes, Ma'am," Edward said, and he stood after giving me another hug. Looking back at me, he walked out of the door towards the principal's office. I was worried because of the history between the two of them. When Jessica had accused Edward of raping her during our sophomore year, before Edward and I got together, Mr. Green had tried to kick Edward out of school. Of course Edward had been cleared of the accusation, but Mr. Green had believed the worst in Edward. He'd never really believed in Edward's innocence, even after his name was cleared. Then when Mr. Green found out about my pregnancy, he'd kicked me off of the cheerleading squad. To say that Mr. Green had it out for the two of us was an understatement, and now, Edward had to go face him again. This time, for something he did do. I was truly worried that it wouldn't turn out well at all.

"Gee, I didn't mean to get Edward in trouble," Jill said.

"LEAVE, NOW!" I said, my teeth gritted and my lips not moving.

"You'd better leave. And don't come back," Alice said, reaching across the table to take my hand in hers. Jasper reached across the table and took my other hand.

"What do you think Green will do to him?" Jasper asked.

"Oh, God! I don't know! I hope he doesn't suspend him. What will Coach Davis do if he gets suspended?" I asked Jasper.

"It may affect his playing time. He may not get to play Friday night," Jasper said, "but he can't suspend him if he didn't throw a punch, can he?"

"Green hates Edward, you know that. He'll throw the book at him," Alice said.

"Maybe he'll just get licks," Jasper said.

"We can only keep our fingers crossed," Alice said.

"Yeah, he's just lucky Anthony and Thomas got to him in time. If he'd thrown a punch, I'm sure he wouldn't be playing Friday night. I'm sure that he'd be suspended for three days, and Coach won't allow you to play if you miss that many days, not even Edward," Jasper said.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer – All things Twilight belong to Stephenie Meyers. No copyright infringement is intended.

A huge thanks to my wonderful Beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 2

Licks

EPOV

I hated leaving Bella, but the sooner I saw Mr. Green, the sooner I would make it back to her. I wasn't looking forward to it. I knew I was in the wrong, and I knew I deserved to be punished for it, but I also knew that Mr. Green wouldn't be objective about it. I'd arrived at the door to the office. _Oh well, better get this over with_. I pushed on the door and walked inside. Mrs. Hope greeted me as soon as I walked in, and she grimaced when I told her why I was there.

"Have a seat, Edward, and I'll tell him you're here," Mrs. Hope said. I sat down in one of the uncomfortable chairs in the outer office. I wasn't there long before Mr. Theo Green, our principal and my nemesis, stepped into the room and motioned for me to follow him into his private office. I got up and walked to the back where it was located.

"Have a seat, Mr. Cullen. School hasn't been in session for an entire day, and you're already in my office. May I ask why?" Mr. Green asked.

"I got angry at something a freshman said and lost control in the cafeteria. A couple of friends were able to stop me before I was able to attack her," I said.

"_Attack her?_" Mr. Green asked. I nodded.

"Yes, Sir. It was a girl who made the statement. I was ready to strangle her, but they stopped me before I could touch her," I said.

"What was her statement?" Mr. Green asked.

"She said Bella tricked me into getting her pregnant and then lost the baby on purpose. Then she propositioned me right in front of Bella," I said. "It infuriated me."

"I see. The truth hurts sometimes, doesn't it, Cullen?" Mr. Green said. I clenched my teeth and hands together. It wouldn't do me any good to blow up at him.

"Mr. Green, what do you have against Bella and me? You know I didn't rape Jessica, and you know Jessica pushed Bella down the stairs. There were witnesses, and she was found guilty in a court of law. Why do you still hold a grudge against Bella and me? What did we ever do to you? Is it because we're so happy together?" I asked. It was the wrong thing to do. He became red in the face, and I could almost see the steam rolling off of his ears.

"Cullen, I will have order in my school. I really wish that your friends hadn't stopped you. Then I could've suspended you. As it is, you have a choice. One day's suspension or five licks," Mr. Green said.

"I'll take the licks. Does that make you happy? You finally get to hit me, after all these years? Make it good, because it's the last time you'll ever hit me," I said. A grin lit his face as he turned to the filing cabinet and pulled out a sheet of paper that he filled out.

"I need you to sign here signifying that you understand that you are choosing to get licks instead of suspension," Mr. Green said. I took the pen he offered and signed the paper where he indicated. Then he signaled for me to stand. I did so, and he said, "Put your hands on the edge of the desk. Don't take them off."

I did what he said, and he took his paddle off of the wall. He walked to my side and drew the paddle back. He swung and hit me. It stung. He swung back even further. He hit me again. He swung it back a third time. This time when he hit me, it hurt. I refused to jump, though. My dad's licks hurt worse than that, and while I didn't get into too much trouble growing up, when I did, he made sure I knew it. He swung back a fourth time, and when he made contact, the pain was intense. He swung back a fifth time. When he hit me, the pain was piercing.

He put the paddle down and returned to his seat. He had worked up a sweat. He looked into my face, and I hoped he saw resolve. "You may return to lunch, now, Cullen. Don't let me see you back in my office," he said.

"Yes, Sir," I said, leaving the room. Mrs. Hope looked at me with pity in her eyes as I exited the office. I just nodded at her and left the building. I was in a hurry to get back to Bella. I knew the others would take care of her, but comforting her was my job. I made my way to the cafeteria. As soon as I entered the door, Bella stood up. I went straight to her and gave her a peck on the cheek. I sat gingerly down beside her.

"Well, what happened," Bella asked before I got down all the way.

"I got licks," I said. "Five of them. Everything's okay."

"Are you okay?" Bella asked, taking my hand.

"Yeah, my ass is a little sore, but I'm okay," I said. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I've been so worried about you. I haven't had much energy to devote to what Jill said," Bella said.

"Well, then at least a little good has come out of this," I said. "He offered me a day's suspension instead. I turned him down flat."

"We were worried about that and what Coach Davis would say if you had," Jasper said.

"I would have never taken that choice, given it was a choice," I said. "My grades are too important."

Just then the bell rang, signaling the end of lunch. We went to Spanish. The period was spent handing out the textbooks, but Mrs. Martinez did assign us a passage to translate for the next day. Our final academic class was AP Chemistry, and Alice was in the class with us. Jasper had no use for the sciences, because he was going to major in history if his ACT score turned out to be good enough to get into college. Bella, Alice, and I had been working with him, hoping to help him get his score up. Bella and I had no reason to worry about ours, though. We'd taken ours during our sophomore year, and we had both scored a thirty-two on it, the highest in our class. We didn't take it last year, but we were going to take it once this year for the fun of it. Mrs. Zimmerman also taught this class, and she lectured to us for the full hour, giving us another ten pages of notes. We had the first section's problems to do for homework. The first day back was turning out to be a killer.

At last, the academic part of the day was over, and it was time for football. As Jasper and I made our way to the field house, we reminisced about what it was like to have Emmett, my older cousin, with us. He had been my center since I was a freshman and had taken over as starting quarterback for the Forks Spartan's football team. He and his girlfriend, Jasper's big sister, Rosalie, had graduated the year before, and they were both going to the University of Washington. Emmett was a shoo in for starting linebacker that season and was attending on a football scholarship. Rosalie was one of the cheerleaders. We had all been together since we were in kindergarten and Rose and Emmett were in first grade, getting together every weekend to play video games or whatnot. Their absence was a big adjustment not just for us, but for the team, as well. In Emmett's absence, I was having to get used to a new center.

As we entered the field house, I heard, "Cullen, in my office, now." I hit Jasper on the back and made my way to Coach Davis's office. I knocked when I got there and walked in. I closed the door behind me and sat down. "What's this I hear about you getting licks today?"

"Yes, Sir. I went after a freshman in the cafeteria. Thomas and Anthony held me back," I said.

"Why?" Coach Davis asked. I told him about the incident.

"Okay. You owe me ten laps after practice. Understood?" Coach Davis said.

"Yes, Sir," I said, wondering where I was gonna find the energy to run ten extra laps.

"Dress out," he said.

"Yes, Sir," I said, and I stood up and opened the door.

"Edward, one more thing," he said. I stopped in the door and turned around to look at him. "How's Bella?"

"She's doing as good as can be expected. She's hurting that someone would say something like that after all this time," I said.

"Give her my best," he said. I nodded, and I left the office to go change for practice. Most of the team had already dressed and left for the field, but Jasper had waited on me.

"What did he say?" Jasper asked me.

"I have ten laps after practice," I said.

"You got off easy," Jasper said. I nodded. I knew I did.

When practice was over, I gathered Bella, and we grabbed a pizza on the way home. As soon as we walked in the door, we sat down and ate, and then we headed upstairs for our shower. I got in, and the hot water felt so good running down my back. Bella began washing my hair, and though I had to lean over to allow her to do it, it felt so good for her to run her fingers through my hair, I didn't mind the inconvenience. When she was done, I fully intended to reciprocate, but I leaned against the wall for just a second, and the next thing I knew, Bella was waking me up. I had fallen asleep standing in the shower. She had already finished her shower and was washing my body. It felt so good I just let her finish. I rinsed off and got out of the shower. I was so relaxed, and the bed looked so warm and inviting. Bella took my hand, however, and led me to our work area. We had several hours of homework ahead of us, and I was so tired. I had to get up at four thirty the next morning, and it was already eight thirty at night. My legs and ass were sore from the activities of the day, so I got up and took some ibuprofen, hoping that it would kick in soon. Four hours later, we packed up our bookbags, and I took them to the car. I had to be up in four hours. The schedule I was on couldn't continue, or I would drop. I would have to talk to Coach about morning practices later on.

The alarm seemed like it went off too soon. I struggled to get out of bed and made my way to the bathroom to shave and wash my face. I didn't know how I was going to be able to get through another day, much less the entire week of practices. If I could hold my head up on Friday, I would be amazed. I made my way downstairs and grabbed a breakfast bar and a bottle of water. I quickly wolfed it down and stepped outside to wait on my dad to pick me up. He was making a special trip by our house that early to take me to practice so Bella could have the car to get to school. When he drove up in the driveway, I ran down to his car and got in.

"How are you this morning, Son?" Dad asked.

"Tired, and you?" I said.

"Yeah, me, too," he laughed. "How was school yesterday? The classes going okay?"

"Yes, Sir. The classes are fine. I got in trouble, though. I got five licks. First and last time Mr. Green will ever hit me," I said.

"Care to tell me what that's about?" he asked me in a hard tone. I was still his son, married and living on my own or not.

"Some freshman spouted off to Bella about Victoria, and I went after her. If it wasn't for a couple of friends, I would have gotten to her, and things would've been much worse," I said.

"Is Bella okay?" Dad asked.

"No, not really. She's dealing, but she's not okay. She's not where she was before. She cried all night. She just went to sleep about an hour ago. She tried to keep it quiet, but I know she was crying," I said.

"Well, let's try not to get into trouble again, Son. You remember that sticks and stones and yadda, yadda, yadda," Dad said.

"Yeah, the problem is that words do hurt, Dad. Especially Bella," I said as he pulled up to the school. I opened the door and got out. "Thanks for the ride. Hopefully this'll be the last one. I'm gonna talk to Coach about ending morning practices."

"Good. They can't be helping now school is back in," Dad said. "Don't forget what I told you." I waved him away and ran towards the field house.

Morning practice was good, though I had a hard time concentrating, and my timing was off. I couldn't seem to get any of my passes to connect this morning. When practice was over and Coach had called for everyone to hit the showers, I hung back.

"I'm sorry about practice, Coach," I said.

"Everyone has off days, Cullen," Coach Davis said.

"Coach, look, I need to talk to you about something. I need you to cut out morning practices, or, at least, cut back the time. I'm running on empty. I didn't get into bed until midnight, and I'm taking four advanced placement courses. I'm exhausted all the time, and I can't pay attention to anything I'm doing, school work or football. Something's gotta give," I said.

"If it was anyone but you asking me this Cullen, I'd make them run laps, but you're still in the running for valedictorian, aren't you?" I nodded. "Okay then, I'll announce in afternoon practice that all morning practices have been cancelled."

"Thank you, Coach," I said. I shook his hand and started running towards the locker rooms. I wouldn't have much time to get a shower and meet Bella. I wouldn't have any time to eat, either.

I showered as quickly as I could, and when I was dressed for school, I raced outside to find Bella. She was standing by Alice and Jasper. Jill and Amanda were hanging around, but trying to not be too obvious about it. I made my way around them and took Bella into my arms and kissed her, more than I should on school grounds. Hopefully no one noticed, except for Jill and Amanda.

"Mmmm, what did I do to deserve that this morning?" Bella asked me.

"You're you. Besides, you didn't get good sleep last night. You're gonna be as tired as I am today. Maybe we should talk to Dad about getting you back on your sleeping medication for a little while," I said.

"No. I don't need anything to sleep. It was just a bad day. Everybody is allowed a bad day every once in a while, aren't they?" Bella asked.

"Yeah, sweetheart, I guess they are. I certainly had one. I broke a twelve year streak of never getting licks yesterday," I said.

"It was time you became a man," Jasper said. "It just wasn't right that you've gone through twelve years of school and never once gotten licks, Edward."

"Yeah, well, Dad didn't agree with you," I said.

"You told him?" Bella asked.

"Yeah, you know I tell him everything, well, not everything now," I said, blushing.

"Yeah, I know. How'd he take it?" Bella asked.

"He acted like he wanted to give me licks, too," I said, laughing. "He always said if I got licks at school, I'd get them at home, too. Does that mean you have to spank me, Bella?"

"Kinky," Jasper said.

"But I'd rather do other things with you," Bella said, "especially after that kiss. If we wouldn't be late for Calculus, I'd take you behind the cafeteria and make your day."

"Promises, promises. Tonight, I'm gonna take you up on that, wife," I said.

"If you can stay awake long enough, I'll certainly accommodate you," Bella said.

"Ewww, whatever happened to 'I don't kiss and tell'?" Alice asked.

"You two have done more than we've even dreamed of doing. Don't ewww, me, Alice Cullen, or you can't come over after the game Friday night," Bella said.

"You're right. I'd take Jasper up on the spanking," Alice said as the first bell rang. I grabbed our backpacks, and we ran so we wouldn't be late to AP Calculus.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer – All things Twilight belong to Stephenie Meyers. No copyright infringement is intended.

A huge thanks to my wonderful Beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 3

The Test

BPOV

The rest of the week was the same, except that Edward could sleep in with me. The homework load never lightened, in fact, the teachers seemed to keep piling it on. Edward and I spent every evening after football practice studying until midnight or later just to keep up with our classes. It was going to be a tough year.

Friday morning finally arrived. Edward dressed in his football jersey, and I dressed in my cheerleader uniform. We barely made it out of the house on time for school because of how attractive Edward looked in his uniform. For some reason, my hormones have seemed to be out of whack lately, and all I could think about was Edward and his sexy body. Luckily, his mind was on school and not sex, so we made it to school just as the first bell rang. We were able to slide into our seats before the tardy bell rang. Mrs. Sims gave us a dirty look, but I couldn't help grinning back at her. She just shook her head at me.

We were on the pep rally schedule, so we didn't even have time to start our homework in any of our classes, and by the time we were supposed to be in the gym, we already had a load of it. We had already gathered our books before last break, and on the way to football, Edward had dropped them in the car. The other girls and I had been putting the final touches on the run through banner for our first game, which was home this year, when the announcement was made for the band students to leave their classes to get ready for the pep rally. We gathered the banner, took it into the gym, and placed it against the stage where everyone could see it. I'd had to back away from it because all of the magic marker smell was making me nauseated, but I helped the others get the banner placed.

About that time, the band started setting up in the stands, and the band major began taking them through some warm up music. I gathered the girls together and went over the cheer arrangement for the pep rally. I wanted to make sure all of the new cheerleaders knew the routines inside and out. We would be sticking to the most basic cheers for the first one, though we might try some of the harder cheers later that night at the game.

The bell rang signaling the end of the school day and the start of the first pep rally of the year. Mrs. Hall, our coach, waved us into position, and we started to jump and shout, waving our pom-poms into the air. We watched as the student population filled the gym bleachers. Then Mr. Green stepped in front of the microphone and waved for everyone to be quiet.

"All right. All right. That's enough. Settle down. Before we begin, I have a few words. This year has gotten off to a great start. Everyone has done their share to make sure this year has been my best year at Forks High since I first started here in 2000. Now, there is still some illegal parking going on; you know who you are. Starting next week, anyone without this year's sticker will be towed at the owner's expense, so get those parking permits. Also, there are still some lab fees that are due. Let's get these financial matters dealt with, people. And now, your cheerleaders and your football team," Mr. Green said.

The band started the fight song, and we did our routine while Coach Davis and the football team came out onto the floor of the gym. When we were done, Coach Davis came to the microphone.

"Are you ready for some football?" he asked.

The crowd went wild. We cheered.

"Well, let me introduce you to your captains: starting at quarterback, senior, number fifteen, Edward Cullen; starting at wide receiver, senior, number ten Jasper Hale; starting at linebacker, junior, number sixty-six Anthony Clemmons; starting at linebacker, junior, number sixty-two Thomas Thompson; and starting at running back, sophomore, number twenty-two Michael Rhodes."

We all cheered, and the crowd yelled at the top of their lungs. The five boys stepped back into the crowd of football players who clapped them on the backs. Then we started our cheering. We did all of the usual cheers, and some of the crowd yelled along with us. Then the band struck up one of their songs for the year, and we did our dance to it. During the middle of the song, the nausea I'd been feeling returned, and I couldn't finish the song. I had to leave the floor and rush into the girls' locker room where I sat down with my head between my knees. I was certain I was going to throw up, but I hated to vomit more than anything in the world, so I just sat there praying the feeling would pass.

Mrs. Hall followed me into the locker room. "Bella, are you all right?"

"Yes, Ma'am. I'm just nauseated. The magic markers made me feel sick earlier. I must be coming down with the flu or something," I said.

"Let me get you a cold rag," she said, getting some wet paper towels from the bathroom. She brought them back to me, and I wiped my face with them.

"Thanks, I must have gotten too hot," I said.

"Well, take it easy. Do you need to stay home tonight?" she asked.

"There's no way I'm gonna miss Edward play, flu or not," I said. "I'm better now, thanks." I stood and walked out of the locker room to see everybody filing out of the gym and Edward anxiously waiting for me across from the door.

"Bella, what's wrong? Why'd you leave like that?" he asked.

"I just got sick to my stomach. I'm okay, now," I said, taking his hand and pulling him towards the parking lot. I wanted to get out of there before the busses started leaving or it'd be forever before we got home.

"Did you throw up?" he asked. I shook my head.

"Nope, just felt like it," I said. "I'm really okay, now. It passed pretty quickly."

Edward and I went to the car and barely made it out of the parking lot. Edward drove us home and carried the books to our bedroom while I went to make him a light supper. I couldn't eat with him; my stomach just wouldn't let me. We spent the rest of the time before the game lying on the couch, cuddling with each other and exchanging the types of kisses we couldn't exchange at school.

All too soon, it was time to leave for the game. After I packed some water for me, we drove back to the school. Alice and Jasper were already there, and the boys left for the field house to dress out. The first words out of Alice's mouth were about me cutting out of the dance routine. I explained about the nausea, and she was quiet for a little while.

"Penny for your thoughts," I said.

"You won't like them," she said.

"Why not? Tell me anyway," I said.

"Are you pregnant?" she asked me.

"No, Alice. I'm on the rag. I started Sunday, just like I was supposed to," I said. We girls shared everything.

"Is it normal?" she persisted.

"A little lighter than usual, why?" I asked.

"'Cause you've been moodier than usual, too. I've got a test in my locker, just in case. Come on, let's go take it. Just to be sure," she said.

"Alice, there's really no reason to. I'm on my period, and I'm on the pill. I haven't missed any doses," I said.

"Yeah, but you were on antibiotics last month for that sinus infection, remember. Sometimes antibiotics can make the pill ineffective. You need to take this test. For me, please," she said.

"Oh, okay, if it will shut you up," I said. I followed her to her locker, and she took out the pregnancy test and handed it to me. I walked toward the bathroom with her trailing behind me and went into a stall. It was one of the easy ones that you just had to pee on, so I did. Then I looked at my watch to time five minutes. After I cleaned up, I walked out of the stall and over to Alice. "I hope that you know this is a waste of your money," I said.

"I hope so," she said.

We waited the five minutes, and then I looked at the stick. A clear plus sign stared back at me. "Oh my God!" I said. "This can't be right. I'm on my period."

"How heavy are you bleeding?" Alice asked.

"Not much but enough to still need a pad," I said.

"You could be miscarrying," Alice said.

"Oh, shit," I said. "I can't cheer tonight. It could be hurting the baby. I could be losing the baby. I'm pregnant. I've got to sit down."

"Not here. Not on this filthy floor. Let's get you to the stands," Alice said.

We walked out of the bathroom, and I was still holding the test wand in my hand. Alice led me to the empty stadium stands.

"I need to talk to Edward. Please," I said.

"You can't tell him before the game. He'll be beside himself. Wait until after the game. Just tell him you aren't feeling good, and you're gonna sit this one out, okay?" Alice asked.

"Yeah, okay. You're right. He'd worry about me and get himself hurt. In fact, don't get him at all. I'll just tell Mrs. Hall I'm not feeling well and watch the game from the stands," I said. "I'll tell him once we get home tonight."

So, that was what I did. I told Mrs. Hall I wasn't feeling well, which I wasn't, and I sat in the stands with Carlisle and Esme. I'm sure they suspected something was going on, but they didn't pry. I wanted to ask Carlisle about the baby so badly, but it would be unfair for Edward's father to find out about the baby before he did. It was bad enough Alice was the first to know. When Edward came to the break-through banner, I saw him talking to Alice, and then he looked at me in the stands. I knew he would worry about me being sick, but it was better than the alternative.

The game was wonderful. Edward and Jasper were amazing. I'm pretty sure there were college scouts at the game because there were men in suits sitting together behind us talking about Edward and Jasper. I wanted to turn around and praise both of the guys, and I'm pretty sure Carlisle and Esme did, too. We ended up winning a blow-out, Forks Spartans 52 – North End Trojans – 0. I did so love to beat the Trojans.

When the game was over, I said goodbye to Carlisle and Esme and told them I had a feeling we would be seeing them the next day. Then I went down to the tree where Alice and I always met the boys after the game. Unfortunately, Jill and Amanda were there, too. They were gathered around the door to the field house, trying to get invited to the after-game party. Most of the guys just passed them by without saying a word to them, but a couple seemed interested in seeing if maybe they might be girls for them to _date_, if you know what I mean. Edward and Jasper came out next, and Jill jumped on Edward, kissing him on the cheek. He promptly turned his face away from her and put her on the ground, pushing her away. He walked over to me, clearly upset.

"I'm sorry about that, Bella. Please forgive me. I didn't expect her to be there," he said.

"It's okay. I know you didn't do anything," I said. "Edward, I need to talk to you. Can we go home?"

"Sure. Are you two coming over after the party?" Edward asked Jasper.

"Yeah," Jasper answered.

"No," Alice said. "Jasper, we're gonna let them have tonight to themselves."

"But that means we have to sleep apart. Alice, you know I wait for the weekends so I can be with you," Jasper said.

"Then we'll camp out. Think of it as an adventure," Alice said. "Bella, can we drop by and get our sleeping bags before we head to the party?"

"Yeah, sure," I said.

"There's no reason for you guys to camp out. You can just stay in your room. Whatever Bella needs to tell me, we can stay in our room."

"No, we're gonna leave you two alone," Alice said.

"You're scaring me. What is it Bella?" Edward asked. "What's wrong?"

"When we get home. I'll tell you when we're home," I said, worried about him being too upset to drive if I told him before we got home.

"No, Bella. It's obvious Alice knows what's wrong, so Jasper can know, too. What's happened?" Edward asked.

I looked at Alice, and she nodded her head. I took Edward's hand in mine and looked around at all of the people still around us.

"There's still too many people around. This is private, for us only, Edward. I don't want anyone else overhearing." He took my hand and pulled me back towards the cafeteria where we were known to make out before games.

When we were alone, he turned me around. "All right, we're alone. Now what's wrong, Bella? What's gotten you so upset?"

"I'm pregnant," I whispered. "Alice made me take the test before the game, and it came back positive."

"I thought you were on your period? How can you be pregnant? Did you miss any pills and not tell me about it?" he asked.

"No, Edward! No! And I thought I was on my period. I guess I'm spotting. I don't know. All I know is the test is positive, and I'm bleeding. I'm probably miscarrying our baby."

"Oh, Bella. Oh my God. This isn't happening. This can't be happening. I have to take you to the hospital," Edward said.

"I don't think they can do anything. If I'm losing it, I don't think they can stop it," I said.

"Did you ask Dad?" he asked.

"No, I wanted to tell you first," I said.

"Well, we've got to call him," Edward said.

"Are you mad at me?" I asked him.

"No, Bella! Why would I be mad at you?" he asked.

"About being pregnant? I thought you'd be mad," I said. "Neither one of us wanted a baby right now."

"Now isn't a great time, but I couldn't be happier," he said. "Now let's get home and call Dad."


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer – All things Twilight belong to Stephenie Meyers. No copyright infringement is intended.

A huge thanks to my wonderful Beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 4

What Could Have Been

EPOV

As soon as we walked in the door, I grabbed my cell phone and dialed Dad's number. It rang several times before a sleepy voice answered.

"Hi, Mom. I'm sorry I woke you up, but I need to speak to Dad. It can't wait 'til tomorrow," I said. I heard Mom call out to Dad who must not have been in the room.

"What's wrong, Edward. Are you and Bella all right?" Mom asked.

"No, I need to talk to Dad, please," I said.

"Okay, he's in the bathroom. He's on his way. What's wrong, Edward? Can I help?" Mom asked.

"No, you won't have the answers to the questions I have, but I'll talk to you after I talk to Dad, okay?" I said.

"Okay, here he is," she said, and Dad came on the line.

"What's going on, Edward? Why are you calling so late?" Dad asked.

"Bella took a pregnancy test tonight. It was positive, but she's bleeding. What do we need to do? Do I need to take her to the hospital?" I asked.

"Woah, what do you mean, Bella's pregnant?" Dad asked. "I thought she was on the pill."

"She is, and she didn't miss any. I don't know what went wrong, but she was feeling nauseated earlier this afternoon, and Alice made her take the test. It was positive, but we thought she's been on her period all week, though, she said it's been lighter than normal. She's been bleeding since Sunday when her period was supposed to start. What do we need to do?" I asked.

"Is she cramping?" Dad asked. I repeated the question to Bella, and she nodded.

"Yes, Sir. Some, but we thought that was her normal period," I told Dad.

"Has she passed anything that looks like tissue?" Dad asked. I again repeated the question to Bella, and she shook her head.

"No, Sir," I said.

"Has she had any blood clots?" Dad asked. I asked Bella, and she shook her head once more.

"No, Sir," I told Dad.

"Well, it's hard to say, Edward. She could be having normal, first trimester bleeding, or it could be a miscarriage. There isn't anything you can do tonight. You need to get her a doctor's appointment as soon as possible, though, and no sex until she sees Dr. Bush. If she passes anything that could be tissue, you need to save it and take it with you to see Dr. Bush."

"Yes, Sir," I said, and I repeated everything to Bella. "Are you sure there isn't anything they can do in the emergency room?"

"Yes, Edward, I'm sure. The only thing they could do is an ultrasound, and they'd have to call in a tech to do it. No one in the ER is qualified to decide what exactly is going on tonight. She needs an OB's expert opinion, and they're not going to call in an OB for a possible miscarriage. They're just gonna tell you to follow-up with her OB on Monday," Dad said.

"So, what do we do in the meantime?" I asked, the frustration coming through in my voice.

"Have Bella take it easy. That's all you can do, Son. Now, your mother is reaching for the phone. Did you want to talk with her?" Dad asked.

"Yeah, I'd better," I said, ending the call with him.

"Hi, Mom. I guess you've gotten the gist of what's going on. Bella's pregnant. We just found out tonight."

"How did this happen, Edward?" Mom asked.

"Well, when a mommy loves a daddy," I started.

"Edward!" she said in a louder than normal voice.

"What do you want me to say, Mom? We're not celibate," I said.

"But what about school?" she asked.

"What about school? We don't intend to drop out. We're just gonna have a baby, the Lord willing," I said, taking Bella's hand in mine. She squeezed it, and I looked her in the eyes. "Look Mom, I need to get back to Bella, okay. We'll talk again tomorrow."

"Sure, Edward. You two get some sleep," Mom said. "Bye."

"Bye, Mom." I hung up the phone and leaned over to kiss Bella. "Well, sweetheart, Dad said there's nothing we can do until you see Dr. Bush. We'll have to try to get you an appointment for Monday. In the meantime, you're not supposed do anything strenuous."

"That's why I didn't cheer tonight. I didn't know if it would matter or not, but I wasn't gonna take any chances. Really, Edward, I still can't believe that we're gonna have another baby. It's almost surreal."

"I know. What do you think happened? I know you didn't miss any pills. I'm sorry for suggesting that earlier."

"Alice said it may have been because I was on antibiotics last month. Sometimes they negate the pills. I guess that could be it."

"Well, the doctor should've warned you about it if they did. He didn't say anything about it, did he?"

"Nope. I would've remembered something like that."

"Well, what's done is done. Now we just have to hang onto this little one. What do you want? A boy or a girl?" I asked.

"A healthy baby is all I care about," she said.

"Funny, before Victoria, I thought things like the sex of the baby mattered, but now, all I want is a healthy baby, too."

I took her into my arms and carried her to our bedroom. Laying her on the bed, I helped her get situated and changed out of her cheerleading uniform and into her nightgown. I got dressed for bed once she was settled. After our nighttime routine, we snuggled and talked for a while longer about the baby and what we thought about the possibility of being parents again. We drifted off not long afterwards in each other's arms, sleeping peacefully and dreaming of the future.

Alice and Jasper came over the next day. We told Jasper the news and brought both of them up to date with the information Dad had given us the night before. We were trying to keep our spirits up, not even giving the possibility of a miscarriage the time of day. We played around with the video games until it was time for the UW football game.

We sat glued to the television when the game started, watching Emmett play for the team. He had a really good game, and the huskies won easily. It was hard for Bella not to stand up and cheer like the rest of us when Emmett did something good, but she couldn't help but squeal when Rosalie appeared on the t.v. with the rest of the UW cheerleaders. They'd been friends for so long, and I knew she missed Rose as much as I missed Emmett. The two of them had been a constant part of our lives for the past ten years. They should be with us sharing our news. We knew we'd have to call and tell them about the pregnancy and the possible miscarriage, but we didn't want to spoil their trip back to UW. We'd probably tell them sometime the next day.

Alice and Jasper spent the night with us, and though Uncle George was in denial, they shared our guest bedroom. The next morning, we got up and Bella and I went to church while Alice and Jasper slept in. When we got back from church, we decided to call Rosalie and Emmett. We figured they were together; they usually were.

Bella dialed Rose's number. It rang for several seconds before she picked it up.

"Hi, Rose. Don't tell me you weren't up, yet. It's after one o'clock in the afternoon," she said, putting the phone on speaker. "By the way, you're on speaker. The gang's all here."

"Hell yeah, I was still sleeping. We didn't get in until after one o'clock this morning, then the partying started. I didn't make it to bed 'til almost six," Rose said.

"Well, do you want me to call you back later, or do you wanna hear the gossip?" Bella asked.

"Gossip, of course. I'm awake," Rosalie said.

"Is Emmett with you?" Bella asked.

"No, he's still sleeping. You know he's in the athletic dorm. They had a three o'clock curfew," Rosalie said.

"And you stayed out 'till six? Without him? Do tell," Alice said.

"Yes, do tell?" Edward said, mocking Alice.

"It wasn't anything. I stayed out with some of the girls from the squad. We were drinking and got pretty sloshed. I passed out in Sarah's car, and she ended up bringing me back to the dorm," Rosalie said.

"Uh huh. You don't drink like that, Rosalie. What's gotten into you?" Bella asked.

"Just the party life here, I guess. Now, what's the gossip that made you call and wake me up?" Rosalie asked.

"I'm pregnant," Bella said.

"Holy shit! Again! Don't you two know what causes that?" Rosalie asked.

"Yeah, we obviously do," Bella said, "and we're obviously good at it."

"Is this a good thing?" Rosalie asked.

"Well, it's not a bad thing," Bella said, "but, there might be a problem. I'm bleeding. I might be having a miscarriage."

"Oh, no, Bella. I'm so sorry. Are you okay?" Rose asked.

"We're not really entertaining that thought right now," I said. "We're making Bella take it easy, and we're gonna get her in to see Dr. Bush as soon as we can. Hopefully, this is just normal for the first trimester."

"So, you're both happy about the prospect of a baby," Rose asked.

"Yeah, we are," I said.

"Well, congratulations then," Rose said.

"Thanks," Bella said, "Oh, by the way, we saw you on t.v. You looked great!"

"I was so nervous. It was like I'd never cheered before. You wouldn't believe the crowd, and it was an away game!" Rose said.

"I'm so happy for you, Rose. It's quite an accomplishment to make the squad as a freshman," Alice said.

"Yeah, and Emmett did great, too," Jasper said.

"Yeah, he did, didn't he?" Rosalie said.

"Yeah, tell him we said so," I said.

"Okay, I will. I'm supposed to meet him in an hour for lunch. I'll tell him your news, if that's okay?" Rose asked.

"Yeah, that's fine," I said.

"Well, I'd better go get pretty," Rose said.

We all told her, "Bye," and she hung up. I could tell it did Bella good to talk to her. I would have to make sure she got to talk to her more often.

After lunch, Alice and Jasper said goodbye, and Bella and I started our homework. Doing homework on Sundays was nothing new. We'd decided dedicating a full afternoon and evening one day a week on our studies would help us keep up our heavy course load. So, doing it that day wasn't a big leap for us. The only thing we weren't used to was the amount. By the time we finished the assigned homework, we didn't have time to work a full week ahead. This year's schedule was going to be a killer. It was possible we might have to cut some of our extra time with our friends on the weekends.

After I took our books to the car, I came back inside to find Bella in bed crying. I rushed to her side and tucked her into my arms. I pulled her close and asked, "Bella, what's wrong?"

"I went to the bathroom while you were outside, and, and I passed a big clot of blood and some tissue. I put it in a Dixie cup, like your Dad said to do. I think I just miscarried our baby," she said.

"Oh, no, Bella, no." I left her and went into the bathroom, and, sure enough, inside the Dixie cup was a half dollar sized blood clot and something that sure looked like tissue to me. I left it, went back to Bella, and took her into my arms. "It's gonna be okay, Bella. I promise. We'll get you in to see Dr. Bush tomorrow, and everything is gonna be okay."

"How can you say that?" she sobbed into my shoulder. "Our baby is dead, again."

"I just feel it. It's okay, Bella. It's okay."

"Why aren't you upset? I just lost our baby! It's gone. Don't you have a heart?

"Bella, we don't know that for sure. Let's wait until Dr. Bush tells us one way or another before we get all upset. There's nothing to get upset over until we know for sure," I said, trying to console her. My head, however, was spinning. I knew it was true. Our baby was lost. Why was I trying to put off our grief for a day? Would it make it easier for her to deal with the loss if we waited until the appointment to find out it was real? Maybe. That's all I had to go on. I lay down on the bed and pulled her down on top of me. I ran my hands through her hair and rubbed her shoulders until she fell asleep. Then I tried to go to sleep. It wasn't easy. I kept thinking of what could have been.


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer – All things Twilight belong to Stephenie Meyers. No copyright infringement is intended.

A huge thanks to my wonderful Beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 5

Baby

BPOV

The next morning, we slept in. Neither of us had gotten a good night's rest, and we knew that we needed to call Dr. Bush's office as soon as it opened. We managed to get a work-in appointment at ten o'clock, and we were at the doctor's office by nine thirty. I signed in, and I held Edward's hand. Several of the older women in the office stared at us as we sat there with our hands interlaced, and I made sure my wedding ring was visible. It didn't stop the stares we got, though.

When my name was called, we followed the nurse into the back hallway where she weighed me and told me they needed a urine sample. Edward held my purse while I was in the bathroom. It was amazing how easily he'd adapted to things that would have embarrassed him two years prior. When I put the urine in the little slot in the wall which led directly to the lab and came back out of the bathroom, the nurse led us to an exam room.

"Well, Bella, it isn't time for your annual exam. What brings you two in today?" she asked.

"I took a pregnancy test Friday night, and it was positive," I said.

"Well, are congratulations in order?" she asked.

"I don't know. I've been bleeding, and last night I passed this clot and tissue looking stuff. Carlisle told us to watch for that and to bring it in if I passed anything, so here it is," I said taking the Dixie cup in a ziplock bag out of my purse.

"I see. Well, let's get your vitals, and we'll get Dr. Bush in here as soon as we can, okay?" she said.

I nodded, and she proceeded to take my temperature, pulse, respiratory rate, and blood pressure. Next, she had me change into a gown and gave me a blanket to cover up with. It reminded me of our first visit when Edward and I had found out we were pregnant the first time. Edward was so nervous about me getting undressed in front of him. Now, he just took my clothes and folded them for me. No embarrassment at all. Times had definitely changed over the past two years.

I sat back down on the exam table and tried to wait patiently for Dr. Bush to come in. She usually didn't take too long after the nurse was finished, but we had been worked into her schedule, and I wasn't sure how long we would have to wait. I tried to look at some of the magazines in the room, but I couldn't focus on anything. Edward eventually walked over and stood beside me, taking my hand in his. He began to kiss me, gently at first, then with more passion. I could never ignore his kisses, especially lately. I was so wrapped up in what we were doing, I didn't hear the door open and Dr. Bush enter the room.

She cleared her throat, and Edward broke off the kiss. I blushed, and so did Edward.

"I'm sorry, Dr. Bush. I was nervous, and Edward was distracting me," I said.

"I'd say he was," she said. "That's what got you two into this situation again, you know? Well, what that leads to, anyway."

"Yeah, I know," I said, smiling, and I felt the blush go deeper.

"Well, Josie told me what is going on. Let me see the tissue, please," she said. I handed her the ziplock bag, and she looked inside of it. "It does look like you've miscarried, but I need to do an exam and an ultrasound to be sure. Let's get you into position." She helped me slide down on the table, and then she examined me. "Your cervix is definitely opened some. This doesn't look promising, Bella, but let's get the ultrasound anyway."

I held the gown around me, and put my panties back on. We followed her to the ultrasound room where the tech was waiting. I lay down on the stretcher and, by the time that Edward was situated, the tech was ready to start the procedure. She moved the probe around and then she called Dr. Bush. Dr. Bush repeated the movements for several minutes, taking several pictures. She mumbled to herself the whole time. Finally, she seemed content with what she was seeing, and she told me to get dressed.

Edward and I waited for her in her office. She came in five minutes later and sat down behind her desk. "Bella, Edward. The tech came to get me because what you have going on is a pretty uncommon event. She wanted me to confirm her findings. Bella, you are pregnant. You seem to be carrying a healthy embryo. I'm gonna need to get some serial blood work to make sure this embryo is healthy and remains healthy because you did miscarry its twin."

"Ma'am? I don't understand. Am I pregnant, or did I have a miscarriage?" I asked.

"Yes, to both. You were pregnant with twins, Bella. You lost one of them. The other one seems to be healthy so far, right at two weeks and two days," Dr. Bush said.

"So, I lost a baby?" I asked, the shock of it just now hitting me fully.

"Yes, but you are still pregnant," Dr. Bush said. "I need to get you on pre-natal vitamins. Are you having any nausea or other symptoms?"

"I'm nauseated from time to time, and my breasts are sore," I said.

"Okay, I'll get you some phenergan for the nausea, as well," Dr. Bush said. "I'm going to draw your blood today, and I want you back on Wednesday afternoon, after school is fine, for another blood draw."

"Yes, Ma'am," I said.

"Do you have any questions?" she asked.

"Yes, Ma'am. What is Bella allowed to do? Can she go to school or does she need to be on bed rest?" Edward asked.

"She can carry on as usual. Nothing she did caused this miscarriage. It wasn't her fault. It's just the way things happened," Dr. Bush said.

"What about cheering?" Edward asked.

"I wouldn't necessarily be doing flips and such, but jumping and shouting is okay as far as I'm concerned," she said.

"Thank you, Dr. Bush," Edward said.

"Anytime, Edward. Tell your Dad, 'Hello' from me," she said.

"Sure thing," Edward said.

We left the exam room and paid for our visit and the labwork. We got school excuses and went back to school. Morning break was already over by the time we arrived, and we joined classes in fourth period. Edward seemed happy about the situation, but I couldn't let go of the fact I'd just lost a baby. It didn't matter that one had survived; I'd still lost a baby. I felt like crying, and it was all I could do to hold in the tears as we discussed our short story for the day.

When the bell rang, we went to lunch and met up with Alice and Jasper. They immediately wanted to know about the doctor's visit. I hung my head. Alice came around the table to sit by me.

She whispered in my ear, "Did you miscarry?"

I nodded and buried my head into her shoulder, letting the tears fall. I couldn't help the sobs that escaped my throat, and Edward leaned over to pull me away from Alice. I didn't let go. I just hung on tighter.

"Bella, what's wrong? Are you upset that you're pregnant? Talk to me!" he whispered into my open ear. I shook my head.

"Wait, I thought you said you miscarried. You're pregnant?" Alice whispered. I nodded. "How can that be?"

"Twins," I managed to gulp out before I pulled myself together and sat back up. Jasper was watching the commotion with wide eyes. He'd heard what we'd said, and the table behind us had heard what we'd said as well. Anthony and Thomas were looking at Edward and me with wide opened eyes.

"Don't say a word to anybody," Edward warned them. They nodded, knowing it was a bad idea to cross their quarterback. Once Edward was satisfied they'd stay quiet, he turned back to me. "Bella, why are you crying?"

"Because I lost a baby. Don't you get it? I lost another baby. That's two I've lost, now. It's not fair. What's wrong with me? Am I just a baby killer? This is ridiculous. I can't believe I've lost another one, and you don't seem to be the slightest bit upset by it. You weren't upset last night, and you aren't upset today. I don't know what your problem is, Edward Cullen!" I said.

"Bella, I told you last night I had a feeling it was gonna be all right, and it is. We're still gonna have a baby. Dr. Bush said this baby looks good. She's gonna follow it closely to make sure, but it looks fine. Don't dwell on the other one. She said it wasn't your fault."

"I know it wasn't my fault, but it doesn't change the fact we lost a baby, Edward. Why are you missing that fact?" I whisper-yelled at him. "I don't want to discuss this here. It's not the right place or the right time." I turned my back on him and buried my head in Alice's shoulder again. I felt her run her fingers through my hair.

"Sometimes men just don't get it, do they?" she asked. I shook my head.

I didn't speak to Edward for the rest of the school day. I got to cheerleading practice, and though Edward had semi-cleared it for me to continue cheering, I didn't want to take a chance with the baby I was still carrying. I asked Mrs. Hall if I could speak with her.

"Mrs. Hall, I'm pregnant. I'll turn in my uniform tomorrow," I said.

"Woah, Bella. When did this happen?" she asked.

"I found out this morning. I had twins, but I miscarried one of them over the weekend. That's what the nausea was last week. I don't want to take a chance with the other one, even though my doctor said I could continue to cheer as long as I didn't do flips."

"You didn't have to tell me this early, you know. You could've kept it a secret and continued to cheer for a couple of months, probably through the end of football season," she said.

"Yeah, but the health of the remaining twin is too important to me. I've already lost its sibling, and I don't wanna chance losing this one. You do understand, don't you?" I asked.

"Yes, Bella. I do, and I respect you greatly for it. I'll miss having you on the squad," she said.

"I'll miss being on the squad," I told her, "but Alice can handle the rest of the girls fine without me. I can still be around to help, if you want me to be, maybe as an advisor or something?"

"Sure, that would be great," she said. "I'd love to have you advise the squad. Now get in there and start advising."

"Yes, Ma'am." I went into the gym and told Alice what I'd done. She gave me a hug and assured me that we'd tell the squad together. I let her know I wasn't ready to tell them why I was quitting, and she agreed that Edward and I needed to be on the same page before we announced to the school that we were expecting again.

After we gathered the girls together, we told them I was stepping down from the squad, and they all wanted to know why. I explained to them my course load was too hard, and I needed more time with Edward. None of them mentioned that quitting cheerleading wouldn't help me with any of those goals. I hoped they just took my decision at face value. Anyway, I sat in the stands and helped Alice with the team by telling her when someone was off.

When football practice was over, I met Edward at the car. We drove home in silence. When we entered the house, the phone was ringing. Edward ran over to answer it. It was his Dad wanting to know what Dr. Bush had to say, so he relayed our visit to him. I went to the bedroom and took a shower while he was on the phone. When he came into the bathroom, he just looked at me.

"Why did you start without me?" he asked.

"I'm upset with you," I said.

"Why Bella? I don't understand. What is it you want from me? Do you want me to mourn a baby we didn't know existed? Not to mention the fact we were lucky the other twin is healthy."

"Can't you see I've lost two babies? What if I lose this one, too? Aren't you the least bit afraid? And yes, I'm mourning the baby I lost. It was a part of me. If we weren't having another baby, wouldn't you be mourning the one we lost? I would, and I am! I don't understand why you've cut off your emotions for that baby!"

"Because we've got another one to focus on. Dr. Bush said that it's growing fine! She's gonna watch it, but it is fine! Don't borrow trouble!"

"I'm not borrowing trouble! I'm being cautious! I don't want to lose a third baby!" I ran from the bathroom and threw myself down on the bed. Edward slammed the door to the bathroom, and I could hear him swearing as he started the shower. I was furious with him for not understanding my point of view. I curled into a fetal position. When I heard the shower cut off, I was still lying there in the same position. Edward took his time drying off, and when he came into the room to get dressed, I didn't meet his eyes.

"Are we having supper?" he asked me.

"There's sandwich meat in the fridge," I said. "Feel free to make your own."

"Fine," he said, and he slammed the door on the way to the kitchen. Several seconds later, I could hear the sound of cabinets and drawers being slammed open and shut as he made himself some supper. My tears escaped my lids as I realized we were in the middle of our first real fight when we should be holding each other, both happy and sad over the news of the day.


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer – Stephenie Meyers owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.

A special thanks goes out to my beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 6

Gone

EPOV

We did our homework in silence, and for the first time in almost three years, I didn't kiss Bella goodnight. I didn't know what she wanted from me. She was lying on her side of the bed, curled up in a little ball, crying. I, for the life of me, couldn't figure out why. I knew she had said she was sad because we'd lost the baby's twin, but if she could only see the bigger picture, that something good had come from the loss. We would have a hard enough time taking care of one baby and getting through our senior year of high school, much less two babies. When Dr. Bush first mentioned twins, I'd felt the bottom drop out. Then, when she said Bella had miscarried one of them, to be honest with myself, I'd been relieved. That's why I couldn't bring myself to grieve for the one we'd lost. I didn't think Bella had thought through the consequences of what our lives would've been like if she hadn't lost the other baby, and I don't know how to explain it to her. It wouldn't matter if I tried at the moment anyway; she wasn't listening to a word I was saying.

This fight was ridiculous, and we should be happy. We were still having a baby, for God's sake! I knew it was going to be hard for us to get through school with our schedules and a newborn, but I thought we'd be okay; I hoped. Anyway, I refused to dwell on what I could only see as a good thing.

I was finally able to drift to sleep, and I dreamt about holding our newborn daughter. She looked just like her mommy, and I was already in love with her. She was born healthy, and that time, nothing went wrong. When the alarm clock went off, I woke up happy. So happy, in fact, I had forgotten that Bella and I were fighting. I rolled over to take her into my arms and kiss her good morning, just like I've done every morning since we found out we were expecting the first time, and she turned her head and pushed me away.

"I'm still upset with you, Edward. I don't suppose you've come to your senses and realized we lost our baby, yet, have you?"

Reality came crashing back down on me. I still refused to grieve for something I saw as a fortunate turn of events.

"Bella, I understand you have a need to grieve for the miscarriage, but I don't. I think it was God's way of leaving us with only one baby, which honestly is all I think we can handle. I don't feel the need to grieve for a loss when we have a perfectly fine baby that you are carrying. I think we should be happy. We should be looking forward to the baby we're having, not backwards to the one we're not."

"So we shouldn't grieve for Victoria anymore? Is that what you're saying?"

"No, Bella. We had Victoria for seven months. She was real to us. She moved and kicked. We saw her on ultrasound and counted her fingers and toes. We listened to her heartbeats time and again. We had a baby to hold when she died, not some tissue fragments."

"I thought you said you believed life begins at conception! That's why we didn't even consider aborting Victoria! Have your ideas changed about that now?"

"No. I believe you are carrying our baby. It's just not formed, yet."

"And if I lose this one, too, are you gonna be so heartless. Do you want me to have an abortion? Just get rid of the tissue. After all, you don't care about the tissue! You don't love it! You just want convenience!" Bella got up from the bed, went into the bathroom, and slammed the door. I ran my hands through my hair. That conversation didn't go the way I'd wanted it to go. She just didn't see the difference.

As we gathered our things to take to the car, I noticed Bella had her cheerleading uniform with her. "Why are you taking your uniform? We don't have a pep-rally today."

"I'm turning it in to Mrs. Hall. I told her yesterday that I'm expecting, so I'm off the squad."

"Why the hell did you do that? Dr. Bush said you could still cheer. I asked her on purpose."

"I don't wanna take any chances with this baby, and I can't keep sitting out."

"Well, don't you think you should've at least talked to me before you told someone else about our situation?"

"It was my decision to make, and I made it. I didn't tell anyone else, and she won't tell anyone. Besides, it would be like you talking to Coach Davis. You do that all of the time."

"I would never have told him you're pregnant without you telling me it was all right. Just like I wouldn't tell anyone else about it. You were wrong to discuss it with her before at least talking to me first. We're supposed to be married, Bella, and that means discussing things like that!"

"It's my body, and you didn't really seem to care about the baby either way. If I miscarry this one, you won't give a damn, so I'm the only one who's here to take care of it!"

"Screw you, Bella! That's not true, and you know it. I'm the one who asked Dr. Bush about your limits. I'm the one who asked her if you could cheer. She's the one who said it was okay for you to continue, not me."

"Screw me, Edward Cullen, Screw you! All you care about is whether I'm on your damned bus to the away games! Well, Mrs. Hall said I could stay on as her assistant, if you give a damn, so I can still ride your precious bus!"

"That's not it at all, Bella! I just said that we needed to discuss these things before you go and tell them to the school! What if I wasn't ready to tell anybody else right now? What if we lose this one, too? Then what?"

"That's what I'm trying to avoid! I don't wanna take any chances!" The tears were streaming down her face in rivulets by the time she finished her rant, and as we pulled into our parking space, she jumped out of the car and walked around to the trunk to get her backpack.

"I'll carry it. Remember, you're not supposed to do anything strenuous," I said.

"Just give me the damned backpack," she said.

"No, I said I'd carry it. Don't be a stubborn asshole. Just meet me at your locker," I said, and she walked away. I got both backpacks and made my way through the crowded hallway to our lockers. There was no Bella when I got there. I started putting my books up, and when she didn't show, I put hers up as well. I waited on her 'til the first bell rang, and then I headed for our first class. When I got there, Bella was already in her seat, talking to Alice, a wet paper towel in her hand.

I put her books beside her desk and sat down in mine without saying a word to either of them. I got out my homework to pass to the front of the class. I didn't even look at Bella during the entire class period, and when the bell rang, she jumped up from her seat, and, leaving her books, she left the room. I repacked both of our bookbags and headed to our second period class. It was the same during second period. Neither of us even looked at each other.

When the bell rang for morning break, Bella left me and went on ahead. I stopped by our lockers and traded out the books we would need for the rest of the morning. Then I walked outside to our spot. Bella and Alice were still talking, and I walked up to Jasper.

"Trouble in paradise, man?" he asked.

"Yeah. We're fighting," I said.

"Wanna talk about it?"

"Nope."

"Okay." So we spent the rest of morning break talking about some new plays that Coach wanted to try during the week. When the bell rang for us to go back in, Bella's eyes were red and swollen, and her face was again tear streaked.

The rest of the day was the same, and when Alice and Bella decided to sit at a different table than Jasper and me during lunch, the rumors started spreading that we were splitting up. Her red eyes didn't help the rumor mill in the slightest. I continued to carry her books to our afternoon classes, but by then, she still wouldn't even look at me, much less speak to me.

By the time football came around, I was glad to finally get out of the spotlight. Jasper and I made our way to the field house, and I started changing for practice. We worked on some new plays, and it felt good to get away from my problems.

When practice was over, I made my way to the car where I was supposed to meet Bella, but she wasn't there. There was, however, a note under the windshield wiper blade. I took the note off of the car and read it. It basically said Bella was going to spend the night with Alice. She didn't think she could be around me without fighting, and fighting wouldn't be good for the baby at the moment. I crumpled the note up and pulled out my cell phone. I dialed Bella's number and waited for her to pick up.

She never answered but let it go directly to voice mail. I waited until it beeped for a message, then I said, "Damn it, Bella! Don't do this! You are my wife, and I expect you home where you belong. How are we gonna work this out if you run away?" I clicked the phone shut, and then I called Alice's cell. After a few rings, she answered the phone.

"She doesn't wanna talk to you, Edward," Alice said.

"Yeah, well, I wanna talk to her," I said.

"She needs some time to get her thoughts together. She's gonna stay over with me tonight and maybe a couple more. It depends on how things go," Alice said.

"Damn it, Alice. Don't get in the middle of this! This is between Bella and me, and you're butting in where you don't belong!" I said.

"I'm her best friend, and she came to me, not the other way around," Alice said.

"Then you should've been a friend and told her to come home so we could work things out, not made them worse! She's my wife, and she belongs home with me," I said.

"Not when you make her feel the way she's feeling right now," Alice said.

"Fuck you, Alice! This is none of your business!" Alice hung up the phone. "Fuck!" I screamed at the top of my lungs, and then I kicked the car leaving a nice sized dent in the driver's side door. It helped me blow off some steam, so I kicked it again. Then I felt strong arms surrounding my upper body.

"Enough, Edward. In my office, now." I looked around to see Coach Davis. He let me go and started walking to the field house. I looked around the parking lot to see many of my teammates staring at me and at my car. "Now, Cullen." I started to follow Coach Davis back to the field house. Once inside, he led me to his office. "Close the door and take a seat." I did as instructed. "Now, care to tell me what that display was all about?"

"Not really, Coach. This time it's personal," I said.

"Every time it's personal, Edward. I just saw you lose it for the second time this year, and we're barely in the second week of school. You don't lose it, and you don't cuss, and you just did both. Now what's up?"

"It's nothing, Coach," I tried again.

"It doesn't have anything to do with the rumors about you and Bella fighting, then?"

"Rumors are just that…rumors. Don't believe everything you hear, Coach."

"And don't lie to me, Edward. What are you two fighting about?"

"Look, Coach, I don't get involved in your married life, and I'd appreciate it if you didn't get involved in mine."

"I could always bench you until you talk to me or someone else about what's bothering you."

"Then, by all means, please, bench me, Coach. As soon as my mind isn't on the game, please, feel free to bench me. It's only football. Are we done?"

"Yes, Edward, we're done. You know my door is always open to you."

"Yes, Sir. I know." I got up and left his office. I walked back out to the locker room and changed back into my practice shorts. Then I went back out onto the football field. I started running laps. Sometimes just running would help me process my thoughts. Sometimes the wind in my hair would help me work things out, and boy did I need to work things out.


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer – Stephenie Meyers owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.

A special thanks goes out to my beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 7

Football

BPOV

I knew the phone call was from Edward even before I'd listened to it, and after I had, I knew I'd made the right decision to stay over at Alice's. Edward was still pissed, and I didn't need the added stress. My Aunt Cindy and Uncle George by marriage were somewhat reluctant to let me stay. They told Alice it wasn't their place to come between Edward and me if we'd had a fight, and Alice should stay out of the middle of it. I'd told them I'd just go to a hotel if it would be easier on them, and they finally consented to let me stay one night.

Alice and I had a good time. We hadn't had much girl time since I'd gotten married almost two years before, and we gave each other mani/pedi's. We didn't talk about the elephant in the room at all.

I'd gotten my books from the trunk of our car before we'd left school, so I did my homework. That night was the first time in ages, at least six or seven years, that I'd done my homework without Edward by my side. The tears started again when I sat down to do it, and Alice grabbed my hand and squeezed it. She instinctively knew what I was thinking.

After I'd lay down, I had a hard time falling asleep. I missed Edward's warm body next to mine. I missed his breathing. I even missed the noises he made when he rolled over during the night. Somehow, I knew I would be going back home the next day, fighting or not.

When the next morning arrived, I woke up sick to my stomach. My nausea medicine was at home, so I had to deal with it. Alice leant me some of her clothes, and we arrived at school after Edward did. The first thing I noticed was the dent in the car. Had he been in an accident? Was he okay?

I jumped out of the car and grabbed my books. I ran to my locker hoping to meet up with him, but he wasn't there. Then I went to our first period class, but he wasn't there, either. I didn't know where to look for him. The first bell rang and still no Edward. Where was he? As the second bell rang, he slid into the room, apologizing to Mrs. Sims for being late. He handed her a slip of paper, and, after she read it, she nodded and told him to take his seat. He came further into the room and sat down in the seat next to mine. He occupied himself with getting out his homework. I tried to get a good look at him, so I could see for myself that he was all right. I didn't see anything wrong with him, but he wouldn't look at me, so I didn't get a very good look at all.

When first period was over, he left the room as I was gathering my books. I followed him to AP Biology, and he wasn't walking as if he were hurt. We got to class, and he sat down before I got there. Once I sat down, I turned to talk to him, but he was talking to someone else on the football team. They were talking about some stupid play that Coach Davis had them working on. By the time Mrs. Briggs called the class to order, I didn't have time to speak to him.

When the bell rang for break, he again left me behind. I knew I would catch up with him at our area, so I took my time. I planned out what I was going to say to him. As I walked outside, I looked over to our area, and Jasper and Alice were there, but no Edward. I walked over to them.

"Where's Edward?" I asked.

"What do you mean? We thought you two were held up in class or something. He hasn't made it out, yet," Alice said. I looked at Jasper, and he wouldn't meet my eyes.

"Jasper, do you know where he is?" I asked.

"I'm not getting between you two. I'm not Alice. Edward didn't tell me where he was going, no," he said.

"What do you mean, 'You're not Alice?' That's not a nice thing to say. She was here for me when I needed her to be," I said. "I'm the one who asked her to let me spend the night, not the other way around."

"Wait, you didn't go home last night? No wonder he was so upset! How could you, Bella?" Jasper asked.

"Don't start in on her! You obviously don't know what they're fighting about, 'cause if you did, you'd understand why she didn't want to go home last night, Jasper Hale!" Alice said.

"What? Did he hurt you? Hit you?" Jasper asked. I shook my head. Edward would never raise a finger to hurt me, physically anyway. "Then there's nothing that could be so bad that you should've stayed away from your home. I know he didn't cheat on you."

"No he didn't, it's just that . . ." I said.

"No, don't tell me. He doesn't want me to know, and I respect his wishes in the matter. If he wanted me to know what you two were fighting about, he would've told me himself," Jasper said. "As it is, Alice you're in way over your head. I want you to step back and get a grip on reality. This is their problem to work out, and I don't want you to get involved."

"Who are you to tell me what to do and not to do Jasper Hale?" Alice asked, venom in her voice.

"I'm your fiance', and you getting in the middle is just making things worse for both of them. You girls and your gossip. That's all you do. No wonder he was so mad last night! I don't blame him for losing it!"

"What'd he do? Is he all right? I saw the car. Did he get into an accident?" I asked.

"No, he kicked in the door after getting off the phone with you, Bella," Jasper said.

"I didn't talk to him last night," I said.

"I did," Alice said. "I told him Bella didn't wanna talk to him and that she was staying over at my house."

"So now you've got his Uncle George and Aunt Cindy choosing sides against him. Way to go, Alice. Some cousin you've turned out to be," Jasper said. Then he turned and walked away.

"Jasper Hale, you get back here this minute!" Alice called out after him, but he just continued to walk away, not looking back. "Oh, I'm so not done with him! He's gonna be so sorry when I'm through with him! He's gonna think twice about walking away from me in the future!"

"Alice, don't you and Jasper start fighting because of Edward and me. It's so not worth it," I said. She shook her head.

"Where does he get off telling me who I can talk to, and who I can't? Who does he think he is? Just because Edward wants to stay tight lipped about what's going on, doesn't mean that you can't vent to your best friend, does it? He's jealous, that's all! He just wishes that Edward and he were as close as you and I are! That's all!"

"Well, at least I know Edward is all right. I just wish I knew where he is," I said. The bell rang for the end of morning break, and we made our way inside to our government class. Edward made it in just before the tardy bell rang, and again, he refused to look at me. I tried to take notes, but the scare I'd had that morning, that he might have been hurt, had brought me at least partway back to wanting to speak with him, but he was having none of that.

During AP English, I heard his voice live for the first time in two days when he was called on to answer a question. I thought his answer was well thought out. He'd obviously not been too upset to do his homework the night before. All I had to do was make it through the period, and I'd be able to try to talk to him at lunch.

When the bell rang, I hurriedly gathered my books and took them to my locker. He was beside me, but he wouldn't look at me. Once he'd gotten his books put up, instead of heading towards the cafeteria, he went towards Jasper's locker. They spoke for a couple of seconds, and then they turned and walked the opposite direction of the cafeteria. I didn't know what to do, so I decided to follow them. I trailed them to the field house where they went inside. They stayed there for about ten minutes, and then they came outside dressed in their practice clothes. They went out onto the football field, and Edward started throwing the ball to Jasper. Coach Davis came outside to watch them, giving them some instruction along the way, and with about ten minutes until the next class, he called them in.

"Good work-out boys. Those scouts are really gonna like the things you two are working on. I'm sure you two are gonna get picked up. You two need to start thinking about where you wanna play your college careers," he said.

"I don't know, Coach. There's so much going on right now," Edward said.

"Remember, my door is always open, Cullen. When you're ready to talk about it instead of taking it out on your car, let me know," Coach Davis said.

"Will do, Coach. Thanks for the pointers this morning. I think we've got this new route down. We can try it with the team this afternoon," Edward said.

"If I don't bench you for losing it again," Coach Davis said.

"Yeah, if you don't bench me," Edward said, laughing. Then they went into the field house.

I went back to the cafeteria and told Alice where I'd been. She was upset that both of the guys had skipped out on us without even telling us where they'd be. I was upset, too, but at least they were playing football. They could've been getting into much worse trouble.

When the bell rang, we went to Spanish. Again, he refused to even look at me, but in AP Chemistry, he was forced not only to look at me, but to speak to me as we were lab partners, and we had a lab today. His answers to my questions were short and to the point, but he was speaking to me. When lab was over and we'd cleaned off our space, he went back to his seat as if nothing had changed. After the bell rang for us to go to afternoon break, I was sure that he would go straight to football, but I needed to talk to him. So when he went to get up from his seat, I grabbed his arm.

"Edward, wait a minute, would you?" I asked. He looked at my hand on his arm and shrugged it off. Then he walked out of the room to our lockers. I followed him. "Edward, I need to talk to you, please," I said. He stopped at his locker and put his head against it.

"What do you want, Bella? You didn't wanna talk to me last night, remember?" he asked.

"I need the keys to the car. I have to go get my blood drawn today, remember?" I asked. "I figured you were going straight to football, and I wouldn't get another chance to ask you." He reached into his pocket, pulled out the keys, and handed them to me.

"Will you be coming back, or does Jasper need to take me home?" he asked.

"I'll come back. It's just a blood draw," I said. "There's no reason for you to worry about coming with me."

"I didn't say I wanted to come with you. I asked you if I needed a ride home. Are you bringing the car back, or are you going home? Or are you going to Alice's again?" he asked.

"I'll bring the car back to you. I planned on coming home tonight, if that was okay with you," I said.

"Whatever you want, Bella. Whatever you want. My wishes don't matter to you in the least bit anyway, so do whatever you want," he said, and he turned and walked away.

"Edward, don't say that," I called to his back as he walked down the hallway. Several of the students stopped walking and talking to look at the two of us as he walked away from me. I reached up to wipe the tears from my eyes and turned back around to my locker, laying my head against it.

"Don't worry about it. He'll come around in time. You're having a baby together. You know he'll be back to himself in no time," Alice said, putting her arm around my shoulders. "Did you wanna come back over tonight?"

"Yes, but I can't. It'll just piss him off worse, and I don't need that drama right now. I have to go. I have to get my blood drawn this afternoon. Have you spoken to Jasper?" I asked.

"No. He's gone to football practice. Would you at least stay until break is over? I don't wanna be alone," Alice said.

"Yeah, I'll stay. I'm gonna check out after break, though. I'm not needed at cheerleading, and I'll be back by the end of school. You're not staying over this afternoon, are you?"

"Nope. We're taking the afternoon off. Are you staying?"

"Yeah. I'm gonna watch the scrimmage. I'll have plenty of time to think about things."

We'd walked outside to our regular spots, just Alice and me, and we were still talking. "You know, Alice, I still don't understand why he doesn't understand I'm grieving for the one that we lost. I feel as if a part of me is gone, even if we don't have anything to bury. I lost that baby just like I lost Victoria, and he isn't even seeing it like that. What can I do to show him that it was a baby, too?"

"I don't know, Bella. I know Rosalie never really mourned the baby she lost. She was relieved she wasn't pregnant anymore, and she got over it pretty quickly. I know she doesn't think of it as a baby. She never really saw it that way. She was just scared shitless and was afraid someone would find out besides us, like hers or my parents. She was thankful she miscarried."

"Maybe it has something to do with Victoria. Maybe it has something to do with the fact I already know what it is to be pregnant and lose a baby, to have one born dead."

"Maybe it does. I don't know, but it's obvious Edward doesn't feel the same as you. He's focusing on the one that you are carrying."

"But then he yelled at me for quitting cheerleading. If he's so worried about this baby, I would think he'd be okay with me quitting. He just wants me on that stupid bus with him." I had started crying again.

"Bella, I don't believe that for a second. Edward is excited for this baby. All you had to do was read it in his eyes. He wouldn't want you to do anything that would jeopardize it."

"Then why did he yell at me?"

"I don't know? Maybe he's under a lot of pressure, too." The bell rang, and I gave Alice a big hug. Then I picked up my books and headed to the office to check out.

I replayed mine and Alice's conversation during the ride to the doctor's office. I didn't know why Edward was so upset. It didn't make sense to me. I wasn't doing anything but protecting our living baby and grieving for our dead one. Why couldn't he see that? Why couldn't he support me?

Once I got to the doctor's office, they called me right back and drew my blood. Dr. Bush told me to come back on Friday afternoon for another blood draw, and I told her okay. She said she would be in touch with the results of this one, probably tomorrow afternoon. I told her about quitting cheerleading, and she said she thought it was a good idea.

I drove back to school and went to the football stands to watch the practice. Edward and Jasper were working hard to get their new play to work. I just sat there, watching. I must have fallen asleep, because the next thing I knew, Edward was shaking me awake.

"Come on. It's time to go," he said. I got up from the stands and followed him to the field house. I stood by the tree while he got dressed, and when he came out, we walked to the car. He opened my door for me, and I got in.

He got in and started the car. "How'd practice go?" I asked.

"All right."

"You and Jasper working on a new play?"

"Yes."

"We've really got a lot of homework, don't we?"

"Look, Bella. You didn't come home last night. I haven't forgiven you for that. I'm not up for small talk."

"Edward, I was hurting, and you didn't care. At least Alice cared."

"Damn it, Bella, I cared. I'm your husband, for God's sake. Of course I cared. I may not understand it, but I care. You, on the other hand, you go and start making decisions without talking to me about them, and then you spend the night away from home. What am I supposed to do, Bella? Just forget it? We're supposed to be a team, and when we have our first fight, you run away!"

"I didn't run away. I just needed some space to think."

"That's bullshit, Bella! You've been spilling your gut to Alice, and you run into her arms at the first sign of a problem. Who are you closer to, me or her?"

"You, of course! Why would you even ask me that?"

"Because, you've told her everything! You've told her all of it! It's our life, Bella! Yours and mine. I haven't told Jasper or Coach Davis or even Dad, even though all of them are there for me. It's our problem, yours and mine! Not Alice's."

"But she understands where I'm coming from, and you don't! You don't even seem to be trying! You just say there's nothing to grieve over and to get over it!"

"I never told you to get over it! I just don't see why you're so upset. We've got to get our act together and keep this baby healthy, and getting upset like this isn't helping." Just then, a siren and flashing lights came on in the rearview mirror. "Shit!" Edward pulled over to the side of the road.

"Where's the fire, Edward?" the police chief, my father, asked as he came up to the car.

"No fire, Charlie. I just wasn't paying attention to the speedometer," Edward said.

"It looked like you and Bella were having quite a conversation. Is everything okay?" my dad asked.

"Yes, Sir, everything's just fine. Just having a little spat. We need to talk to you soon, though" I said leaning over Edward's shoulder.

"Okay, let's see if you can get home without breaking the sound barrier, Edward, okay?" Dad said.

"Yes, Sir. Sorry about that," Edward said.

"Oh, what happened to the car?" Dad asked. "I didn't hear about any fender benders."

"Well, I got a little upset and kicked it," Edward said. "Don't worry, it's fixable."

"On your budget? What's going on between the two of you? Do I need to be worried about my little girl?" Dad asked.

"Of course not. I'd never hurt her," Edward said. "I'm not the one who's hurt her."

"Well, you two get home," Dad said.

"Yes, Sir," Edward said. "Bye, Charlie." We drove off and made it home without any further incidents.


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer – Stephenie Meyers owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.

A special thanks goes out to my beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 8

Working it Out

EPOV

The rest of the week and the next were pretty much the same. At home, things hadn't gotten any better. Bella and I were not on speaking terms, and we basically co-existed in the same house. I'd started sleeping on the couch the previous week, and we weren't even doing our homework together. I didn't know what to do to make everything right again. I refused to give in and grieve for the miscarried baby. Bella refused to forgive me for it, and I refused to forgive Bella for leaving our home and staying with Alice. She hadn't even apologized for it.

Coach Davis had continued to try and get me to talk to him, and in that moment, I thought I might do just that. I had been going to the field house to go over plays with Coach during morning break ever since our fight had started, but when morning break rolled around, I stepped into Coach's office and shut the door.

"Can we talk this morning, Coach?" I asked.

"It's about time, Edward. What's going on between you and Bella?" he asked.

"We're fighting, and it's serious. Neither one of us is giving in. I thought I could fix it on my own, but it's just getting worse."

"What started it?"

"Bella is pregnant again."

"And you aren't happy about it?"

"No, I couldn't be happier. It's not that at all. She was pregnant with twins, but she miscarried the second baby. I can't find it in my heart to grieve over the miscarriage, and she's holding it against me."

"Oh. I see."

"She got so upset about it she stayed with Alice. She left me for a night, and she hasn't even apologized for it. That was the day I kicked the car, by the way."

"I see."

"I can't forgive her for leaving me, for leaving our home."

"Edward, you're in a tough situation. There isn't an answer for what you're going through. The two of you should be happy about bringing a new baby into this world, and instead, you two are focusing on little, trivial things that won't matter a hill of beans when you hold your baby in your arms, if you two are still together, that is."

"I love her, but she left me Coach. I can't get over that."

"Why not, Edward? She came back, and she loves you. She just needed some time with her friend. You all used to spend time with each other, and you wouldn't have ever denied her time with Alice. What changed?"

"She didn't even talk to me about it. She just took off. She left me a note. We aren't communicating, and that's the problem."

"Look, Edward. I want you to talk to Bella. I want you to tell her you forgive her for going with Alice, but you are upset with the way she did it. Can you do that?"

"Yeah, I think I can do that, if she will listen."

"Don't come back at lunch, Edward. You go to your wife, and you start working things out with her. You have too much to lose."

"Yeah, but we've got to work on our plays as well. The scouts have been at the games . . ."

"Did you hear me, Edward? Your marriage is on the line. That's more important than any college scouts. You and Jasper get your personal lives back on the right track."

"Yes, Sir."

The bell rang for the end of break, and I ran to make it to government. I looked at Bella when I made it to class, but she wouldn't look at me. The animosity between us had to stop. Dad had said I would learn how to grovel to keep my marriage intact. I guessed it was time to start.

The rumors about us fighting had continued and spread all over the school, and I guess it was obvious. I'd said during my wedding vows I'd never leave Bella's side, and yet, there I was, not only leaving her alone during the day to face everyone and the rumors, but I was sleeping on the couch. I had to do something to fix our problems before they got any further out of hand.

When the bell sounded for lunch, I followed Bella to our lockers. I put my arm in front of her to stop her from continuing down the hallway towards the cafeteria.

"Bella, please wait. I'd like to talk to you," I said. "In private." I added, looking around at all of the people who were still in the hallway and headed towards the cafeteria.

"I don't have anything to say to you, Edward," she said, and my heart dropped into my stomach.

"Please, Bella. We've gotta find a way to work this out. There's too much at stake to continue to fight like this. I'd like to talk to you, to tell you how sorry I am for my part in this whole thing, for not understanding your feelings, for not being there for you when you needed me to be," I said.

"It's not that you weren't there. You were. It's just that you didn't care. Edward, I can't get into this now. I don't wanna cry at school again, and I don't want anyone to overhear our conversation. We can talk tonight, after practice," Bella said.

"Do you promise?" I asked her.

"Yes, I promise, but I don't promise everything is gonna work out. There's been too much water under the bridge for things to just go back to the way they were," she said.

"Don't say that, Bella. What we have together is good. One fight isn't enough to destroy what we have," I said.

"I hope not," she said, "but there's a lot at stake here. We haven't even told my dad our news, and we definitely haven't told any of our parents that we're fighting. I hope we can work it out, but we've got a long way to go."

"Can I sit with you at lunch?" I asked.

"I thought you and Jasper had to see Coach Davis again," she said, sarcasm in her voice.

"No, he told me to get my life with you straight. He won't let me go back to the field house at lunch anymore. He said you are too important," I said.

"So, you're here because Coach Davis sent you, not because you want to work this out," she said.

"No, Bella, I went to him for advice on how to work it out, and he told me I needed to start by facing you and not avoiding you. He forced my hand," I said. "So, can I join you for lunch?"

"Sure, but don't expect to discuss our situation. That topic is off limits, okay?" she said.

"Okay. Until we get home tonight," I agreed.

I followed her to the cafeteria, and we sat down at our usual table with Jasper and Alice. As soon as I sat down at the table with the girls, I saw several people at surrounding tables begin to talk behind their hands. They were staring at Bella and me. We were again the topic of conversation. However, I honored Bella's request, and we talked about our classes and the upcoming ballgame. We even talked about some of the college scouts Jasper and I were trying to impress, but we never talked about the elephant in the room.

When football practice was over, and we'd gotten into the car, I reached out to take Bella's hand. She instantly pulled it away from mine. It was the first time I'd tried to touch her since we'd started dating she'd ever pulled away from me. It hurt. I stared straight out the windshield the rest of the way home, not even daring a glance at her out of the corner of my eye. When we got home, I carried her bag in, as usual, but when we entered the door, I stopped and turned towards her.

"Okay, Bella, we're home now. I wanna talk about this. I'm sorry we lost the other baby. I'm even sorrier that I wasn't the husband you needed me to be when you were grieving for the other baby. I'm not sure what I could've done differently. I held you, and I tried to give you comfort. I'm sorry I didn't cry over the other baby. I just think I was a little relieved that we weren't having twins."

"Edward, I didn't need you to cry. I needed you to acknowledge that another baby existed, and we lost it. The way you were acting was like it was just a fingernail I'd cut off. Like it was unimportant. Like I could just grow another one to take its place. Edward, it was a baby!" Bella was starting to cry now, tears running down her cheeks, her voice cracking.

"I know, Bella. And maybe I didn't tell you how I felt in adequate words. My comments were in no way meant to belittle the fact that we lost another baby. However, I couldn't say that I was totally unhappy about it either. Bella, I didn't want twins. I didn't really want another baby at the time. This all came as quite a shock, if you'll remember. I find out on Friday night that you're pregnant, and on Monday morning, you've lost one baby, and you're still pregnant with another. That's an awfully big pill to swallow, especially when we're supposed to be protected against getting pregnant."

"Do you think it was any bit less of a shock to me? Do you think I intentionally got pregnant? Do you think I knew longer than you? I told you hours after I found out. You found out everything else exactly when I did. I didn't wanna be pregnant either. I didn't want twins either, but I would've rather have had twins than lost another baby, Edward. That's two babies I've failed to protect and provide a home for. Don't you see that somewhere I'm letting our children down. Who's to say that I can even carry this one to term? What if I lose this one, too?"

"Bella, most miscarriages happen because there's something wrong genetically, not because of something the mother did or didn't do. There was something wrong with the baby, not you. You haven't done anything to lose either one of our babies. This one will grow fine. Dr. Bush hasn't said anything to make you think differently, has she?"

"No, her latest phone call said all the labwork has been looking good. She does want me to come in next week and do another ultrasound just to be sure, but she says she isn't worried."

"Why haven't you told me about the appointment?"

"We haven't been speaking…or did you forget?"

"No, I haven't forgotten, but something like that should have been communicated to me somehow."

"I would've let you know before I went."

"The same way you let me know about your going to Alice's."

"Probably."

"I'm still angry about that. You could've told me to my face you were gonna spend the night with Alice. I would've never tried to stop you, but the way you did it was wrong. I don't understand why you did it; why you didn't just tell me."

"Alice was leaving, and I wanted the ride. I didn't have time to track you down and tell you. I didn't think I had to have your permission to spend the night with Alice. I'm still my own person, whether we're married or not."

"But as your husband, it would've been common courtesy for you to have told me you were going."

"I let you know where I was gonna be. Alice was leaving, and I wanted to ride with her."

"I could've taken you over to her house if you would've only waited and told me."

"But I was upset with you. I didn't want to talk to you at that moment. I didn't want anything to do with you, and I'm not sure I still don't."

"Bella, remember our wedding vows. We promised each other that we'd stick together through thick and thin. I didn't think we'd split up over our first fight. I thought we'd be able to live together for eternity. My love for you hasn't changed, Bella."

"My love for you hasn't changed either, Edward, but I can't tolerate your callousness towards your own child."

"I'm not being callous, Bella. I'm being realistic. I want you to be healthy, and I guess it's a good thing you quit cheering. It's just…it hurt you so badly last time with Victoria when you got kicked off the team, I didn't want the same thing for you. I wasn't thinking anything about the football bus; I was thinking about you being kicked off of the team again."

"Really? You weren't worried about me riding the football bus with you to the away games?"

"No, Bella, and it hurts me you would think that about me. You were devastated when Mr. Green kicked you off of the cheer squad when he found out about Victoria, and I wanted you to be able to continue to cheer as long as you wanted to. Sure, I love the fact you could've been on the bus with me, but the health of our baby is so much more important than that."

"Edward, I'm so sorry I jumped to conclusions. I don't know why I did. Maybe I was upset because I knew I couldn't ride on the bus if I told Mrs. Hall about the baby. Maybe I was just throwing my guilt onto you."

"That's okay, Bella. We've just gotta work the rest of this out. Come sit down on the couch with me." I took her hand, and this time she didn't pull away. We talked for a couple of more hours until I could hear her stomach growling, and then I got up and went into the kitchen and made us both some sandwiches. We ate in silence, deliberating about the things we'd talked about earlier.

Finally, after we'd finished eating, I suggested that we go and work on our homework.

"I'd like that," Bella said, taking my hand into hers and pulling me back to our bedroom.

When we were finally finished with our homework, I told Bella I needed a shower. She told me to go ahead and take mine first, that she'd take hers after I was finished, so I did. I was a little disappointed we couldn't shower together, but at least we were talking again. After our showers were complete, I asked Bella if I could return to our bed, and she said it would be fine with her. I was pleased that we were moving in the right direction.

The next morning, I rolled over to give Bella a good morning kiss, and she didn't pull away from me. I only gave her a chaste kiss, not taking it any further, but again, it was a start.

"Bella, we need to tell your dad we're expecting again. Do you wanna invite him over for burgers tonight? I'll grill. We should get out of practice a bit earlier than usual. Coach said he has somewhere he needs to be tonight," I asked.

"Sure. Do you think we can get through today without fighting? I don't wanna invite him over with us not speaking to each other," Bella said.

"I think we can make it through one day without fighting, don't you?" I said.

She nodded, and then she picked up her cell and called her dad to invite him over. Luckily for us, he said he'd be happy to join us.

We drove to school, holding hands. It was nice, like when we were first together. It had been so long since I'd touched Bella in any way. It made my fingers tingle. I wondered if it made her feel the same way.

When we made it to school, I picked up both backpacks, and we walked beside each other to our lockers. We didn't hold hands, but we were walking together which was an improvement. At break, the four of us talked about our day. I stood close to Bella, my hands inside my pockets to try not to take her hand in mine. I didn't want to push her too far. Unfortunately, that was the day Jill and her little friend decided to come back into our lives. They walked up to us as soon as we walked outside.

"Hi, Edward. It's good to see you back at break. I've noticed you've been gone, and the rumors around school are you and her are having problems. I just wanted you to know, I'm here if you need someone out of your regular circle to talk to."

I moved up to Bella's side and took her hand in mine. "Jill, Bella and I are fine. I've just been working out during break and lunch. However, I've decided that leaving Bella alone and the rumors that has been causing isn't worth the extra practice time. I've asked you before, please leave my wife and me alone." Bella squeezed my hand and smiled at me. I smiled back at her.

"Is that why she's been crying so much?" Jill asked.

"I didn't know she's been crying. Bella?" I asked.

"Well, I've missed you. You know I carry my heart on my sleeve," she said.

"No wonder people have thought we've been having problems," I said.

"Yeah, I've been overly emotional and missing you," she said.

"That's not what I've heard. I even heard that you left him," Jill said. "And Edward kicked in his car door because he got so mad at you."

"I wouldn't believe all you hear," I said. "Bella and I are fine." I reached over and kissed her, and she kissed me back.

"Yeah, I'm just more emotional than usual," Bella said. She looked at me, questioning in her eyes. I could tell that she wanted to tell Jill about the pregnancy, and I really didn't have any reason not to let everyone know. I'd been holding out to keep her in cheerleading, and she fixed that problem herself.

"Before your dad?" I asked.

"Sure. We're telling him tonight, so why not. I'm tired of being an emotional wreck, and people not knowing why," she said.

"Okay, it's fine with me," I said.

"Jill, we're fine. I'm just more emotional than usual. I always get emotional when I'm pregnant. Edward and I are having a baby, so, you can see, we're fine."

"You're joking. You can't be pregnant and at school," Jill said.

"We're married. We certainly can be pregnant," I said. "We're looking forward to this baby. It's why Bella quit cheering. Now if you didn't have a reason to leave me alone before, you certainly do now."

"Well, I was just offering a shoulder to cry on if you wanted it because of the rumors, but if you don't want it, I can take a hint," Jill said.

"I certainly hope so," I said.

The bell rang for class, and we went inside holding hands. I listened in class, and when the bell rang for lunch, we walked hand in hand to the cafeteria. As we took our seats we leaned back to the table behind us and told Thomas and Anthony that we were letting people know, so they could now tell people, if they asked, that we were expecting. We thanked them for keeping our secret for as long as they had. Then we talked during lunch about school and our school projects. We both had appointments that afternoon during last period with our mentor, Mr. Thompson, about our senior projects. They weren't like research projects or anything like that. They were more community service projects. I thought I might spend some time playing the piano for the nursing home in the area, and Bella had thought about candy striping at the hospital. It had been before we found out about the baby, though. We'd have to run it by Dad before we made any final decisions about her project.

The meetings went well, and we attended them together. We told Mr. Thompson about the baby, and he was happy for us, but he agreed Bella may need to find another project. Being around sick people may not be the best thing for the baby. He gave her another week to think about it and research it, and they were to meet at that time. He approved my project after an audition. I told him I'd been playing all my life. He wanted to hear a sample, so we went to the music room which, thankfully, was empty. I played him a sample of some Chopin, and he was thoroughly impressed.

That afternoon, practice was short, and, when we got home, I fired up the grill while Bella made the hamburgers. Her dad arrived shortly after I got the patties on the grill, and we talked in the backyard while they were cooking. When we finally sat down at the supper table, he looked at Bella and said, "Okay, why did you two call me over this evening. What's going on?"

"I'm pregnant," Bella said.

"Oh. Okay. Not what I was expecting. I thought you two were taking precautions against that," he said.

"We were. It just happened. We've known about it for about two weeks now. I was carrying twins, but I lost one of them. We've been waiting to tell you until we were fairly certain this one would make it," Bella said.

"You mean you've had a miscarriage? Oh Bella, I'm so sorry. Is there anything I can do?" he asked.

Bella stared at me, and I grimaced. "No, Daddy. I'm okay now, but it was hard to accept at first."

"I guess the Cullens already know," he said.

"Yes, Sir. We called them when we first realized I was pregnant and bleeding. We wanted to know what to do to try to save the baby. Carlisle told us there wasn't anything we could do, and we ended up losing that baby," Bella said.

"Well, what are the two of you gonna do? Don't you have a really tough year this year?" he asked.

"Yes, Sir. Our year is gonna be difficult, but we'll support each other. We'll both take care of the baby, and we'll make it through. We may not be valedictorian like we always wanted to be, but that's a small price to pay to have our family," I said. "I'm certainly not gonna let Bella bear all of the burden of taking care of the baby by herself. If I could help her carry it, I would."

"Now you're being silly, Edward. I can do that by myself," she said.

"Yeah, but I'll be beside you every step of the way. I promise," I said, taking her hand and kissing it.

"Well, I still think you two are too young to be parents, but you seem desperate to prove me wrong about that," he said.

"Let's just get through this pregnancy, and then you can tell us, 'I told you so' all you want to," Bella said.

"Nothing is gonna go wrong, Bella. Dr. Bush said everything looks good with this baby," I said.

"Yeah, but I've already lost two of three babies. My batting average isn't all that good, do you think?" she said.

"Actually, you know as well as I do that batting three-thirty is actually a not a bad batting average, right Charlie?" I asked.

"Right, Edward. You keep stats for the baseball team, Bella. You know that's not a bad batting average," he said.

"I was just sayin'," Bella said.

"I know what you were sayin' sweetheart, but don't let it worry you. This baby is gonna be fine. I promise," I said.

"You can't make that promise, Edward. We thought Victoria was gonna be fine, too, and look what happened. Anything can happen at any time, so don't go and make promises you can't keep," Bella said.

"Okay, Okay. But I need you to quit worrying all the time. Please, for me," I said.

We finished the meal with small talk, about the baby, about school, about nothing in particular. Charlie left right after supper to allow us time to do our homework, and we finished at a decent hour. That time, when it was time to get into the shower, I invited Bella in with me. She turned me down, but she thought about it first. I think we were still making progress. When our showers were over, we watched television for the first time since school started back. There really wasn't anything on, so we put in a DVD and enjoyed snuggling anyway. When we went to bed, Bella allowed me a goodnight kiss, though it was without tongue. I felt as if we were getting there, though we still had a long way to go.


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer – Stephenie Meyers owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.

A special thanks goes out to my beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 9

The Hangover

BPOV

Edward was speaking to me again, and he'd apologized for not being who I'd needed during the time right after I'd lost the baby. However, that just wasn't enough. He seemed to think that just saying, "I'm sorry," made everything all right, that all of the hurt would be gone, but it wasn't. It couldn't be, because the hurt ran too deep. The foundation of my relationship with Edward had been shaken to its core. Everything he was saying was the sort of thing I expected him to say to get out of the fight we were in. I didn't know if he meant it or not.

We were making an attempt to appear to be together at school. It wasn't anyone's business that we were having such a major problem with our marriage. It just gave people like that little Jill permission to move in on Edward. I guess I was still possessive of him because I couldn't stand the thought of anyone else being with him, even if I couldn't stand the thought of me being with him at this moment. I knew I still loved him; I just didn't like him very much at the moment.

Friday came around, and we had a home game. I sat on the sidelines with the cheerleaders as Mrs. Hall's assistant. We won the game 56 to 3. Edward and Jasper did very well, and I'm sure the scouts were happy with what they saw. When the game was over, I waited at our tree for Edward to come out of the field house.

It took some time, but eventually he and Jasper came out. They walked over to Alice and me and asked us if we wanted to go to the after game party. I told Edward that I really had no desire to go. I was tired and wanted to go to bed, but he could go to the party if he wanted to. He decided to go home with me. He was tired, too. Alice and Jasper decided to go to the party. They said they'd be over afterwards, so we said we'd leave the door open for them.

They offered to sleep somewhere else, but we told them they could stay with us for the weekend. We went home, and I got my shower. Edward had already had one at the field house. We talked some about the game and the possibility of scouts being there. We'd started talking about where we wanted to go to college. We thought about going to the University of Washington. The school was good, and we could both major in our chosen specialty, pre-med. We didn't know if we wanted to go to UW for med school, but their pre-med program was okay. We would also be relatively close to our parents if we needed a baby sitter. Edward said we could always hire someone to be a nanny during our classes, and then we would take care of the baby after we got home.

When we went to bed, Edward leaned over to kiss me, and I allowed him to give me a chaste kiss. When he moved to deepen the kiss, I pulled away.

"No, Edward. I'm not ready to go there, yet. I'm still not ready to forgive you."

"Bella, this is ridiculous. I told you that I'm sorry I wasn't there the way you needed me to be. What else can I do? I love you, and I know you love me, too. We've gotta move forward, and you've gotta forgive me for not being what you needed me to be, or we'll never get over this."

"It's not as easy as just saying, 'I'm sorry, and I love you, so everything is okay,' Edward."

"Why not? Why are you holding onto all this hurt?"

"I don't know. I just know that it's not that easy to let it go."

"Bella, you hurt me, too, but I'm willing to let it go to save our marriage. I love you enough to let it go. We're gonna make mistakes. We can't hold them against each other if we're gonna work out,"

"It just doesn't work that way with me, Edward. I can't just forget."

"Fine. I'm going out." Edward said. He went into the closet and got dressed. He left the room and the house. He drove away, leaving me home alone. I didn't know where he was going, and I didn't really care. I just wanted to be alone.

I got into bed and curled up into a ball. The tears started streaming down my face as I wondered why it was so difficult for me to let go of what had happened. Edward was right in theory. I should be able to forgive him for it if I loved him, and I did love him, more than life itself. I just couldn't get past the fact that he didn't feel anything for the baby we'd lost. I couldn't. It was like I was seeing a whole new side of him that I didn't like. I cried myself to sleep.

The next morning, I woke up alone in my bed. I got up and ran to the bathroom, sick to my stomach. The bathroom was empty, and when I was done, I rinsed out my mouth and went into the living room where I found Edward asleep in his clothes on the couch. He smelled of alcohol which was unusual for him. He never drank. I looked outside and noticed that our car wasn't there. Thank God he hadn't driven home the night before. He must have ridden home with Alice and Jasper.

I went into the kitchen and took my nausea medication. Then I sat down at the kitchen table and drank some juice. I didn't keep it down. I ran to the bathroom, and I guess I woke Edward up, because when I came back into the kitchen, he was standing there with a bottle of water. He looked at me, but he didn't say anything.

"You were drinking last night?" I asked.

He nodded.

"Why? You know what would've happened if you'd been caught," I said.

He shrugged.

"You're back to not talking to me?" I asked.

"Why not, Bella? You can't get over it. Why should I keep trying?" he asked.

"I don't know, Edward. I can't stand the silent treatment. I can't stand knowing you've done something so stupid. I do still love you."

"You don't show it," he said, and he turned and left the room. I leaned against the counter and hit it with my fist. One step forward and two steps back. It seemed that was the way our lives were going. It wasn't that I didn't want to forgive him for his attitude...I did. I just couldn't forget the way he so callously got over our baby's death. It was a side of him I didn't know existed. It was a side of him I didn't like at all. I didn't know there was anything about Edward that I didn't love with my whole heart, so it had come as an utter shock. I wasn't able to just let it go. I didn't know why because there was nothing I wanted more at this moment in time than for him to take me into his arms and make love to me. I wanted to be his again, but the thought of him touching me or hearing his voice made me cringe. I screamed and took the glass I'd been drinking out of and threw it against the wall. It shattered, sending glass shards scattering across the cabinet and the floor.

Edward came running into the room and saw me standing there amidst all of the broken glass. He was barefooted like I was.

"Don't come in here. There's glass everywhere," I said.

He nodded and walked back out of the room. I bent over and started picking up the pieces of glass that were around my feet. A minute or two later, Edward came back into the kitchen with a pair of shoes on, and he handed me a pair of my shoes.

"Put these on," he said. I leaned into a clean spot on the counter and put on the shoes. Then Edward came into the room with the broom. He started sweeping the shards of glass into a pile. "What happened?" he asked.

"I threw the glass," I said.

"Are you cut?" he asked.

"No, I'm fine," I said.

"Okay." He helped me clean up the mess in silence. When all of the glass was gone, he took the garbage bag to the outside trash. Afterwards, he came back in and looked me in the eye.

"Were you trying to hurt yourself?" he asked.

"No. I was just angry," I said.

"Okay." He walked away, back into the den, without saying another word.

Alice walked into the kitchen and came up to me. "When are you two gonna work this out. This is ridiculous."

"I know. I know. I just can't seem to get over the fact that he's being so callous."

"He's trying to work things out with you. You're gonna have to get over it. He was miserable last night. He just got drunk, and he wouldn't talk or dance with anyone. He just sat there and drank himself silly."

"Well, I'm glad he didn't dance with anyone. I'd have to kill him if he had. And as far as talking to girls goes, he'd better be glad he didn't do that either."

"He wouldn't even dance with me, Bella. I was trying to get him away from the alcohol. All he wanted to do was get wasted."

"Well, I'm pissed that he got so drunk. Where's the car?"

"We made him leave it there. I drove us home. Jasper can take him back to get it today."

"Well, thank God he didn't try to drive home."

"That's just the thing, Bella. He did try to drive home. He was in the car when we stopped him. We had to fight him for the keys."

"That's not like him."

"That's what I'm telling you. This whole situation has to stop. Both of you are under way too much stress! This isn't good for him; this isn't good for you; and this definitely isn't good for the baby."

"I'm trying. I want to be in the same room as him. I want to talk to him. I just don't want him to touch me. The problem is that when I try to talk to him, we always end up fighting."

"How long has it been since you two have been together?"

"Since we found out we were pregnant."

"That long?"

"Yeah. We've been fighting that long. I haven't let him touch me since the Monday when we lost the baby. He didn't react well, and I blew up at him."

"How many more of our problems are you gonna tell her, Bella?" Edward asked from the open doorway, and he turned and walked away. I watched him go and heard the backdoor open and slam shut.

"Go after him," Alice said.

"No, it's my business if I talk to my best friend about what's bothering me," I said.

"No, not if he doesn't want you to talk about it. He's always been a very private person about your relationship. Go after him and talk to him! Make this right!" Alice said.

I nodded. I walked out of the kitchen and followed Edward outside. He was sitting in a lawn chair with his face on his hands. He didn't look up when I came outside.

"Edward, I'm sorry I was talking to Alice about our problems. She's trying to tell me that I'm being ridiculous about holding the baby against you. I know that I am. It's just, I've never found anything about you I didn't like, and this is something I couldn't live with. I don't know what else to do. I want you back, but I'm scared because of what I'm feeling towards you."

"Bella, I've got one hell of a hangover, and I can't think about this right now. You do what you wanna do. You're gonna do it anyway. You know how I feel about these things. You're just gonna have to live with the consequences." He got up and walked into the house leaving me alone on the patio.


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer – Stephenie Meyers owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.

A special thanks goes out to my beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 10

The Hotel

EPOV

Bella had really done it that time. She knew how I felt about discussing our problems with outsiders, and she just had to open her big mouth to Alice. I went inside and saw Jasper sitting on the couch.

"Can you take me to get the car?" I asked him.

"Sure, man. You okay to drive?" he asked.

"Yeah. I've gotta get outa' here." I said. "If I don't, I'm gonna say something to Bella that I'll regret later."

"Okay, let me get the keys from Alice," he said, walking into the kitchen. He came back a few seconds later and motioned towards the door. I got up and followed him out. We drove to the scene of last night's party in silence. When we got there, he handed me my keys, and I got out of Alice's car. I went to my car and got in. I drove to the lake on the back of my parents' property, hiking to my private spot where I always went when I needed to think. I took off my shoes and socks, rolled up my blue jeans, and hung my feet into the wading pool. I lay back and looked at the clouds. I just relaxed there all morning, thinking about the problems Bella and I were facing.

I didn't know what to do. I finally decided the problems we were facing were twofold. First was the lack of communication between the two of us. Bella didn't seem to lack the ability to communicate her feelings with Alice, just with me. I seemed to have a problem getting my feelings across to her as well. Secondly, the other problem was forgiveness. I thought I could forgive Bella for leaving me and staying with Alice, but she continued to do things she knew pissed me off, like bringing Alice into our situation. Then, she still wasn't able to forgive me for not mourning that damned baby. Well, she was just going to have to get over that. I couldn't force myself to do it. I couldn't be that superficial. Or could I? No, I couldn't. It wasn't in me to lie. Bella would have to accept the real me or no me at all.

When the sun started to set, I began making my way towards the car. I drove home, only to find my parents' car in our driveway. That was just great! I was sure I still smelled of the alcohol I'd drunk last night. I walked into the house and made my way to our bedroom where I managed to take a shower before anyone knew I was home. After I was finished, I walked into the living room.

"Hi, Mom, Dad. What are you doing here?" I asked as I came into the living room.

"We decided to stop by and see the two of you. We haven't heard from you in a couple of weeks, and that isn't like you," Mom said.

"Where have you been, Son? Bella said she didn't know where you were," Dad said.

"I've just been out, thinking," I said.

"Bella said you two have been fighting," Dad said.

"Oh? And what else has Bella said?" I asked looking around for Bella.

"She said the two of you aren't speaking," Dad said.

"Just where is Bella?" I asked.

"She went home with Alice," Dad said. "I encouraged her to. I thought we might need to talk a little, and she doesn't need to hear what I think I need to say to you."

"Butt out, Dad," I said. "I'm not in the mood for one of your lectures. I have a headache, and I'm hungry." I got up from the couch and walked into the kitchen to make myself a sandwich.

"Edward Cullen, you will listen to me. What the hell is going on between you two? Are you seriously fighting?" Dad asked.

"That's not any of your business?" I said. "Nobody asked your opinion."

"Bella said you came home drunk last night," Dad said.

"Bella has a big mouth," I said.

"So, it's true?" Dad asked.

"Yeah. What of it?" I asked.

"Edward, what's gotten into you? You know better. You don't want to be back in trouble with the courts do you?" Dad asked.

"No, of course not," I said.

"Then what are you thinking? Getting drunk? You're under age. You know better."

"I'm so not in the mood for a lecture."

"Well, you're gonna get one. Edward, what's happened between you and Bella? Why are you two fighting when you should be happy about the baby? Or is the baby the reason why you're fighting?"

"I'm not gonna get into this with you, Dad. This is between Bella and me, and I'm not gonna discuss it with you. Do you know if Bella is coming home tonight, or is she staying with Alice?"

"She didn't say anything about not coming home. Why would you think that she wouldn't come home?"

"No reason."

"Edward, talk to me! What is going on between you two?"

"We're fighting, okay. That's it. It has nothing to do with the baby she's carrying now. It's stupid, and I can't get her to see it. She keeps running away from the situation, and she won't give us another chance."

"That doesn't sound like Bella. What did you do that she's so unforgiving about?"

"I really don't wanna get into it. It's our business. I don't pry into your marriage, and I'd appreciate it if you didn't pry into mine."

"Edward, I'm just trying to help."

"Then don't get in the middle. Don't take sides."

"Edward, you know that we're going to be on your side. You're our son, and we're going to stand behind you through thick and thin. We always will, no matter what she thinks you've done or no matter what you've done."

"I haven't done anything to her. There hasn't been any violence or betrayal or anything, so you can rest your minds."

"I know that, Edward. You love Bella, and you would never hurt her that way. But both of you are hurting right now, and we want to help."

"Then. Butt. Out. Please."

"Fine, but we're here if you need to talk."

"Fair enough."

"And Edward, no more drinking. Do you hear me?"

"I hear you."

"Okay then. Bye son."

"Bye."

As soon as they left, I sat down in the living room and pulled out my books. I began my homework, not waiting on Bella to get home. I was able to get a lot accomplished by the time that the door opened later that night. Bella walked in and sat down on the couch beside me. I could tell that she'd been crying again. Her eyes were red and swollen. Her nose was red, and she was sniffling. I didn't say anything to her. I just continued with my homework.

"I came home," she said.

"I see that," I said. "Do you want me to do a happy dance?"

"No, I guess not. I just wanted you to know I didn't stay at Alice's tonight."

"I saw you sit down."

"Did you want me to stay gone?"

"I really don't care, especially after the conversation I ended up having with my dad. Thanks for letting them in on our problems, too."

"I thought they might be able to help us. They've been through so much in their lifetimes."

"So you thought you'd volunteer that I got drunk last night. That's supposed to help us, how?"

"I'm worried about you, Edward. You never get drunk."

"Bullshit. I call bullshit on that one. You were looking to get them on your side. Well it didn't work. If I'd told them anything, they would've been on my side. They're my parents, Bella. Wrong move."

"I wasn't trying to get them on my side. I was trying to get us both some help."

"If you want someone else to know about our problems, why don't you just announce them to the school on Monday? I'm tired of trying to work things out with you. I think it's time for us to just separate. I'll leave. You can have the house. I'll keep paying the bills, and I'll buy you a car. I'll go to a hotel until I can find somewhere else to live. I'll go pack my bags."

"Edward, don't be ridiculous. You can't move out. This is just a little fight. This isn't anything to get so upset over."

"Bella, you've known how I felt about involving other people in our affairs, yet you continue to tell everyone about what we have going on. I can't trust you anymore, and if I can't trust you, I certainly don't wanna be married to you."

"Are you asking for a divorce?"

"I don't know. Maybe not yet. Maybe there is still a chance for us. Maybe we can still make things work. I just don't know." I gathered my books and packed them into my bookbag. Then I went into the bedroom and took out a suitcase. I packed several pairs of jeans and shirts to wear to school, and then I packed my toiletries. Once I was done, I went to the car and loaded things up. I looked once more at Bella who was crying in the doorway, and then I drove away. I went to the local hotel, and I checked in for a week. I went to my room, and plugged in my cell phone. It almost immediately began to ring. I looked at it, and it was Jasper. I answered it.

"Hello, Jasper. What do you need?"

"Bella called Alice hysterical who called me. Did you really leave her?"

"Yeah, but I don't wanna talk about it."

"Edward, things have gotten way out of hand, man. I've let you be silent for the longest time, and I haven't pushed you to talk to me about what's going on, but this has gone too far. You need to let this out, and you and Bella need to get into some counseling."

"Maybe, maybe that would help, but, right now, I'm just tired of her, and her not paying attention to anything that I say. I've had it up to my eyeballs, and I can't even think of being in the same room with her."

"How long are you planning to stay away from her?"

"I booked the room for a week. I'll see how I feel at that point."

"Edward, man, I think you're taking this too far. She's really torn up about you leaving."

"At least I told her to her face. I didn't leave her a note to find like she did me when she left me and spent the night at Alice's."

"Edward, what she did was wrong, but your leaving isn't right, either. You know you need to be at home, trying to work this out."

"At this point, I'm not sure there's anything left to work out."

"Don't say that, man. You and Bella were meant to be together if any two people ever were. You can't let this argument split you two up."

"It's too late for that, Jasper. I'm sorry it has involved you and Alice, but for now, Bella and I are separated. Do you think Alice can give her a ride to school on Monday?"

"I'm sure she can, but I still think you're taking this a bit far."

"Well, this is the way it's gonna be for a while. Look, I've got homework to do, so I'm gonna let you go, okay."

"Yeah, okay. Just think about what I've said."

"Yeah, all I've got time to do is think."

And I did think. I didn't sleep well that night or the next. By the time Monday morning came around, I was a walking zombie from lack of sleep. I didn't want to go to school and face everyone, but I knew that I must. I drove into the parking lot and noticed that Alice's car was there. Bella would already be there, as well. I missed her greatly. I didn't know how hard it would be to be away from her for that long, nor did I know how hard it would be to be in the same room as her and know she wasn't mine anymore, to know I'd basically thrown her away. Oh, well, I guess I had to face her at some point. I gathered my bookbag and walked to my locker. There was a note taped to the inside of the door. I picked it up and read it. It was from Bella.

It said,

"_Edward, please come home. I'm sorry for everything I've done. I need you in my life. I promise we can work this out, and I know I've done so much the wrong way. I've been talking to other people when I should've been talking to you, and I promise that from now on, I'll only talk to you. Bella_."

I folded up the note, slipped it into my book, and walked to first period. She tried to catch my eye when I entered the room, but I avoided her gaze. One apology wasn't going to fix the myriad of things that were wrong in our marriage.

However, the more I thought about it, the more I thought it may be a start. I wasn't ready to move home by any means, but I thought that maybe, just maybe, I may be ready to speak to her. During second period, I met her gaze when she looked my way, and I even gave her a slight smile. She grinned back, almost shy in her demeanor. I looked back to the front of the room, taking notes, not ignoring her, but not paying her any attention either.

When morning break rolled around, she went immediately to Alice and Jasper, and I hung back. I didn't want to go to them like nothing was wrong. Bella and I were separated, and I didn't want to give her any false hopes that we would be getting back together, so I went to the area where most of the football players hung out. I stayed with them for morning break, and though they questioned why I wasn't with Bella, I just told them that it wasn't any of their concern. They didn't press for any more information, and I was thankful.

I met up with Bella at our lockers before our next class, and she asked, "Why didn't you hang out with us at break?"

"Nothing has changed. We're still separated. I didn't wanna give you the wrong idea by standing with you at break. I won't be with you at lunch either."

"But what will everyone think?"

"I don't care, Bella. This is between us. Everyone else's opinion doesn't matter to me. When are you gonna figure that out?"

"I just didn't want the whole school to know we're apart."

"Well, it's too late for that, don't you think?"

"No, really. Please Edward. For the baby, please."

"I'm never gonna abandon the baby, Bella. You should know that. I wanna be there at the ultrasound if you'll allow me to be."

"Of course you can be. It's scheduled for tomorrow afternoon."

"We've gotta get to class." I walked away from her, and she followed me to government. We walked in and took our seats. Alice and Jasper were in this class with us, and they stared at us as we came in. I met Jasper's eyes, and I shook my head. He looked down at his book, disappointed. I took notes for the rest of the period, and we went to English. Bella was called on to answer a question, and she wasn't able to answer it to the teacher's satisfaction. That was the first time I'd ever seen Bella unprepared for a class. I guess my leaving was affecting her pretty badly, but I couldn't let it affect my decision. Our marriage was in danger, and if I had to get away for us to make any headway, then so be it.

During lunch, I sat with the same football players I'd spent break with. I didn't answer their questions about Bella and me; I just told them it was none of their business. We talked about the upcoming game. We had gone undefeated for three seasons so far, and we had won the past two state championships, so we had a reputation to uphold, and the team we were playing next thought they could beat us.

"There's no way, especially if you can keep your mind on the game, Edward," Sam St. Cloud said.

"What do you mean, 'if' I can keep my mind on the game? My mind is always on the game," I said, and a couple of guys at the table high-fived me.

"Come on, Edward. We're not blind. Something is going down between you and Bella, and she means the world to you. How can your mind stay on the game in those circumstances?" Sam asked.

"I've already told you once, and I thought I made myself clear. Bella and I are none of your business," I said, my voice harsh.

"Hell, yes, it's all our business. If you don't show up to play, it's all our business," Sam said, standing up.

"When have I not shown up to play?" I stood up to face him. The rest of the guys at the table stood up as well, two holding me back, and two holding Sam back.

"I'm just worried that you won't. That your personal life is gonna come crashing in on all of us rather suddenly when you lose it again," Sam yelled.

"I'm gonna lose it upside your ass if you don't stay out of my personal life, you little pipsqueak of a sophomore," I said, making a lunge at him.

"All right, break it up boys," Mr. Thompson said as he broke through the circle surrounding our table. "Mr. Cullen, Mr. St. Cloud. Is there a reason for all of this drama?"

"No, Sir," I said, staring at Sam as I sat back down at the table.

"No, Sir," Sam said, following my lead.

"Then do you think you can keep your conversation down to a slight roar?" Mr. Thompson asked.

"Yes, Sir," we both agreed. Mr. Thompson walked away.

"Let me make something clear to you, St. Cloud," I said in a low tone, so low he had to lean in to hear me. "My personal life is just that, personal. It has been for the past three years. I've never once allowed it to interfere with one game of football, basketball, or baseball, and I never will. You need to do your research before you make accusations." I stood and walked away to another table full of football players. They wanted to know what the ruckus was about, and I gave them the gist of it. They stared at Sam, and if looks could kill, he'd be in trouble. As it was, I didn't want to be him on the practice field this afternoon.

Sure enough, when practice time had come, Sam took some hard hits when he was in the line-up, harder than he should have, at least. After three or four hits, I called the defensive unit together and said, "Okay guys, I think he's gotten the message. Let's lay off him. No more singling St. Cloud out, okay?" Several of the guys nodded their heads, and several of them clapped me on the shoulders. I knew they had my back. They might not if I hadn't always brought it when we played, but I'd always been here for them, whether times were bad or not.

At the end of practice, I asked coach about going to Bella's appointment with her, and he seemed thrilled I wanted to go. "They're doing another ultrasound on the baby, just to make sure that everything is going okay. I wanna be there for it," I said.

"Sure thing, Edward. Are you two talking again?" Coach Davis asked.

"No, Sir. In fact, I moved out last weekend. I'm staying at the hotel for a little while, just to clear my head. I guess we're officially separated," I said.

"Oh, no, Edward. That's horrible," he said. "Is there anything I can do?"

"No, thank you though. I just need time alone…time to work on things," I said.

"How do you expect to get back together when you aren't even able to be in the same room as one another?" Coach Davis asked.

"I don't know, Coach. It doesn't look good. Maybe I'm to the point I don't wanna work it out. Maybe I just need to be alone for a while," I said.

"Edward, stop," he said. I stopped walking and turned to face him. "Do you still love Bella Cullen?"

"Yes," I said without hesitating. "Yes, I do, Coach, but I don't think that is enough anymore."

"Why would you say that?" he asked.

"Because I can't stand to be in the same room as her. Most of the time, I look at her, and I grimace. I just wish I could go to another room, or make her shut up, or just make her disappear. I don't think of her and smile anymore."

"Then how do you know that you love her?"

"I don't know. I just feel like I do. I try looking at the future without her in it, and it's so bleak, so desperately empty that I know that I want her there."

"Then tell her that. Nothing more. Not right now. Just tell her you want her in your future, and you want to work towards that."

"I can do that, I think."

"You can do that. I know."

"Yes, Coach."


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer – Stephenie Meyers owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.

A special thanks goes out to my beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 11

Laundry

BPOV

I couldn't believe that Edward had left me. The undeniable fact was…he'd packed a bag and driven away Saturday night. Then, at school, he wouldn't stand beside me at break, and he had almost gotten into a fight over us at lunch. He didn't seem to be having as much trouble adjusting to the situation as I was, but on a high note, he was going to take me to my OB appointment the next day. I had to make sure to dress nicely for him. I didn't want to embarrass him.

Alice and Jasper dropped me off at home…no my house. Without Edward there, it wasn't a home. I understood how Edward had felt when I'd stayed at Alice's. I realized we needed to be together, not staying nights away from each other. I could attempt to justify myself and say that Alice was my friend, and I was spending the night with her, but if I was honest with myself, I was spending the night away from him. His decision to leave was the same thing, but he had the guts to call a spade a spade.

I was lost without him. I walked into the empty house and threw my books down next to the table. I had tons of homework as I'd done none over the weekend. It had shown when, earlier, the teachers had called on me to answer questions. I was thoroughly embarrassed when I had nothing to say.

Edward, of course, was prepared. What did that mean? He was obviously able to do his homework over the weekend. Did that mean he didn't miss me? Wasn't it obvious? He didn't need me. He never did. He just humored me by doing homework with me. I was the dependent one, and I had nothing to offer the relationship. I had nothing to offer him. He was fine without me. I was suffering without him, I missed him something awful, and I wished he would just talk to me again.

Of course, I'd have another chance to talk to him the next day. He was still going to take me to our visit, and I could talk to him then. Yes, I could talk to him then. Now I had to do this homework. If only I could keep my mind on it. Not a chance. The more I tried to study, the more I thought about why Edward should be with me. I couldn't even finish the calculus homework that was assigned, and I'd been working on it the better part of two hours. Maybe he'd answer my call.

I picked up my cell and dialed his number. It rang and rang. No one answered, and I looked at the time. He should have been home, back to his room, by that time. I hoped nothing was wrong. I hung up the phone without leaving a message because I didn't want him thinking I was checking up on him. I went back to the calculus I couldn't seem to get the hang of. It should be easy, I knew. I picked it up so well in class. Was Edward the only reason I did well in my classes? Did I even deserve to be ranked where I was in our class, or was it all Edward's work that paid off for me?

I was still working the same problem twenty minutes later when my cell rang, making me jump sky-high. I looked at the number, and it was Edward. I smiled to myself.

"Hello, Edward. How are you doing?" I asked.

"Is everything okay? Are you and the baby okay?" he asked.

"Yeah, we're okay. Why do you ask?"

"I saw your number on my phone, and I got worried. Why did you call?"

"Oh, well, it's embarrassing, now."

"Well, what is it? You've got me on the phone."

"I need some help with my calculus. I'm thoroughly stuck," I laughed. He chuckled.

"I haven't picked it up, yet. Is it that bad?"

"No, I'm just not able to remember a thing from this morning, and the book doesn't make any sense to me, and I'm just stupid. If it wasn't for you, I'd be a nothing."

"Don't say that. You've helped me as much as I've helped you. Let's see. What number are you having problems on?"

"Number thirty-three."

"Okay, give me a second. The answer's 6x+5, right?"

"Right, how'd you get that?"

"You just take the second derivative."

"Wait, what about the x squared?"

"You take the derivative, Bella."

"What do you mean?"

"The second derivative of x cubed is 6x, Bella."

"Oh, yeah. I get it. I feel so stupid."

"Is this really why you called?"

"Yeah. I've been working on it for two and a half hours."

"Gee, mental block."

"Yeah, I guess so. Homework hasn't been great without you."

"I know what you mean. Look, Bella. I do see us together in the future. I'm not sure exactly when that is, but I do see us together. I don't wanna divorce from you. I'm not ready to let you go, officially, to let you back on the market, so don't go and get any ideas that I've given up on us. I haven't. I just need time, okay?"

"When, Edward? As in before the baby is born? Or are you gonna make me go through labor without you by my side?"

"If I was smart, I'd say that I'd make you go through labor alone. Then my hands might survive the delivery," Edward laughed.

"You think you're funny? That isn't funny. I didn't squeeze your hand that hard. I was holding back," I laughed.

"Yeah, well, I need to get on this homework," he said.

"Yeah, me, too. Can I call you back if I get stuck again?"

"Yeah, you'd better. I wouldn't want you up all night because of a calculus problem."

"Night, Edward."

"Night, Bella." He hung up the phone, and I cradled mine to my ear. What he'd told me finally made sense. It was a stupid mistake on my part. I didn't know how I would ever live this one down. I quickly finished the rest of my homework, and I tried to study some for the upcoming week. I did my reading out loud so that the baby could hear it. It was never too early to begin reading to your child, or so the baby books said anyway.

The next morning, Alice was there to pick me up right on time. I sat in the back seat. Jasper wanted to, but I insisted. I wasn't going to kick him out of his seat just because Edward had kicked me out of mine. I met up with Edward at our lockers. I didn't say anything to him, and he didn't even look my way. Our easy banter of the night before was a thing of the past. Maybe we needed to just communicate on our cell phones.

I tried to pay attention in classes, but my attention kept being drawn back to Edward. He looked so good that morning. I tried to ignore him, but it was impossible. Mrs. Briggs called me to stay after class when she'd called on me for an answer, and I hadn't even heard the question. Unfortunately, her class bordered morning break, so she had all of the time in the world to yell at me.

"Bella, what has gotten into you lately? You've never come to school unprepared, and to not be paying attention! It's almost as if you're drooling over Edward. I'd almost say you have a school girl crush on your husband. What is going on with you?"

"Trust me, I'm not drooling over Edward, Mrs. Briggs," I said.

"Then what is going on? You can't keep your eyes off of him during class, and you're not paying attention."

I guess the tears started flowing without my noticing, because Mrs. Briggs handed me a tissue. "Thanks. I'm looking at him, but I'm not drooling. I just wish that…Oh, it's nothing."

"What's nothing, Bella?"

"I can't talk about it. Edward wouldn't like it. Talking about our problems is why I'm in this mess to begin with." I stumbled through the sentence.

"Bella, what are you talking about? You aren't making any sense."

"He left." I was crying hard now. I wiped my eyes with my hand. "He left me."

"What do you mean, 'he left you?'"

"He's gone. He moved out. He left me."

"Oh, Bella. I'm so sorry. I didn't know. No wonder you've been distracted. How are you doing?" I shook my head. She pulled me into an embrace. Just then Mr. Thompson walked by, and he stuck his head in the door.

"Everything okay here?" he asked.

Mrs. Briggs shook her head. "Bella, as your advisor, he should know when you're going through something like this." I shook my head.

"I don't want everyone to know," I said.

"What's wrong, Bella? You know you can tell me anything. As your student advisor it won't go past me unless you're being hurt in some way. Edward hasn't done anything to hurt you has he?"

"Not like that," I said, wiping my eyes. "He would never raise a hand to hurt me. He would protect me with his life."

"Then what's wrong, dear?" Mr. Thompson asked.

"Edward left me. He moved out last weekend. I'm just overly emotional right now because of the baby," I said.

"What baby? You're pregnant?" Mrs. Briggs asked. I nodded.

"I see. That makes a big difference in this class, Bella. You should have told me immediately. We could have already done dissections. You must wear gloves when you dissect."

"I hate gloves when I dissect," I said.

"I do, too, and most of my students do, but because of the preservatives, you have to wear them. I'm sorry," Mrs. Briggs said.

"Yes, Ma'am," I said.

"What do you mean 'Edward left you?'" Mr. Thompson asked.

"Yeah. I'm not handling it very well. I go home to an empty house, and I cry all night. By the time I get my homework done, it's midnight or later, and then I have nightmares about him leaving all over again. I don't think I've slept three straight hours since he left. But you can't tell him I told you. He doesn't like other people knowing our business. It's why he left. It seems that I can't keep my mouth shut about our lives. I told his parents about our fighting, and he left."

"Well, he won't hear it from either of us. Let me know if you need anything, dear," Mrs. Briggs said.

"Yes, Ma'am. Am I excused?"

"Yes, dear. And Bella, do try to pay attention to my lecture, not Edward during class."

"Yes, Ma'am."

I went back out to break with Alice and Jasper. They had, of course, wondered where I'd been, and I explained to them that I'd gotten in trouble for not paying attention in class. I got a bottle of water and took one of my phenergans for the nausea I'd been struggling with all morning, and just as I finished swallowing the pill, the bell rang for government and Mr. Thompson's class. I took the bottle of water with me and asked Mr. Thompson if I could keep it with me at my desk as I was nauseated, and he told me, "Of course."

Half-way through class, I gave up. I got up and ran from the room to the bathroom and threw up my breakfast. It was the first time I'd vomited at school, and I felt horrible for it. I rinsed out my mouth at the sink and made my way back to government. Everyone looked at me when I came back in the door.

"Are you okay, Ms. Cullen?" Mr. Thompson asked. I nodded and took my seat. I got my water and took another of the phenergans, figuring that since I could have one to two every six hours and I'd only had one, that I could have another. So what if it made me drowsy? That was better than puking my guts up.

About the time I put the water down on the floor, Edward slipped a note onto my desk. It said, "Are you okay?"

I wrote back, "No Stupid, I'm pregnant!" and passed the note back to him, just at the wrong time. Mr. Thompson was looking our way.

"Mr. Cullen, would you like to share that note with the rest of the class?" Mr. Thompson asked.

"No, Sir," Edward said to everyone else's disappointment.

"Bring it to me," Mr. Thompson said. Edward got up and took the note to him. He read it and looked at the two of us. "Okay class. The Cullens' just bought you a pop-test. Take out your paper and number it one to ten." His choice had been to read it aloud anyway, or to keep our privacy and give the entire class a pop-test. I guess he was still feeling sympathetic to me from our earlier talk.

The test was easy, at least to me it was. I'd gleaned at least that much from my reading the night before. I hoped Edward had gotten around to reading, as well. I felt so off not knowing how he was doing. It was foreign to me.

I made it through English by the skin of my teeth; I was so drowsy. Luckily, she didn't call on me that time. The bashing I'd gotten the day before was enough for awhile, I guess.

Lunch time came as a blessing because I was able to put my head down on the table and sleep. I know it wasn't a long nap, but it was needed badly. Once I thought I heard Edward's voice ask about me, but I know I must have been dreaming. Why would he pretend to care? When the bell rang for our next period, Alice woke me up.

"You should get sick more often. It brings distant husbands out of the woodwork," Alice said.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Well, Edward nearly tripped on his own feet trying to get over here to check up on you," she said.

"Why didn't you wake me up?"

"You needed the sleep."

"I needed Edward."

"You didn't need to appear desperate for Edward."

"I needed Edward," I said punching her arm.

"He needed to know he couldn't just walk back into your life. I told him Jasper and I are taking good care of you, that he doesn't have to worry about you."

"I needed Edward," I punched her in the arm again. "I don't care what I have to do to get him back."

I walked up to my locker, and Edward was waiting on me.

"I'm sorry about in government. I didn't mean to get us in trouble," he said.

"I'm the one who didn't watch. I'm sorry." I said.

"Well, at least he didn't read it to the class," he said.

"You could've. We're out at this point, aren't we?" I asked.

"Yeah, but it's our business, Bella. When are you gonna get that through your thick skull. Just…nevermind," he said, and he walked off. I followed him to our next period class. I took my seat next to him.

I leaned over to talk to him, but he didn't meet me halfway. I looked at him, and he didn't meet my gaze. I just settled back into my seat. We were back to not speaking. Wow. We spoke for all of ten minutes. _I'm just so good_. Next time I'll go for fifteen. _Yay, me_!

Class was monotonous, but I paid attention. I actually took notes. When class was over, Edward gathered up his things. I leaned over to him. "Are you still going with me to my appointment?"

"Yes," he said. We walked together to the office and checked out for a doctor's appointment.

We walked together to the car. Edward drove us to the office, and I signed in. Dr. Bush's nurse called me back relatively quickly, and I didn't have to face all of the stares that I was getting used to while I was waiting in the reception area. She took my vital signs and had me pee in a cup, and then she took me to the ultrasound room in the back of the building. There, the technician had me get into one of the gowns, and she performed the ultrasound. We were at eight weeks plus three days gestation and doing well. Edward was excited to hear the heart beat on the machine. Dr. Bush told us we were too early to catch the heartbeat on our Doppler machine. I was crushed because I'd hoped the thought of the Doppler would bring Edward back home. It would be another two weeks before our baby would be big enough to pick up its heartbeats at home. I couldn't live alone for another two weeks. Edward had to move back before then.

When Dr. Bush told us the ultrasound looked good, I felt the relief wash over Edward. So, he did care about this baby. Alice was right about that. I was glad he at least had feelings for our baby, if not for me. I knew our baby would always have his love, even if I didn't anymore. I couldn't help the tears that escaped my eyes.

"What's wrong, Bella? Are you hurting?" Edward asked as I was getting dressed.

"No, not physically, anyway. I'm just so glad you're gonna be here for the baby. I wasn't sure you loved it," I said.

"Of course I love it. I love you, too. I just still need time by myself," he said. "I need time to work through my thoughts. I want us to work out, and me being mad at you every time I see you isn't gonna work, Bella. We need times like these when we can see each other and not fight. We need times when we can be alone together and not blow up at each other."

"Then this is a good start. Would you like to come over and do our homework together?" I asked. "I could make you some supper. I know you couldn't have been eating good."

"Not tonight. I have too much to do. I have to do my laundry and . . ."

"Bring it. You don't have laundry facilities at that hotel, do you?"

"No, but I'm not gonna move out, and then come back and take advantage of you. I'm the one who moved out. I'll go to a laundry mat, and I'll get take out. Don't worry about me. I'll be fine," he said.

"But don't you see? I wanna worry about you. You're my husband, and I love you. I want you back home, and if it takes doing your laundry and making you a meal to get you home for just one night, then I'm more than willing," I said.

"That's just it, Bella, I wouldn't be coming home. I would be visiting at best. I would have no intention of staying the night," he said.

"Oh, well, then, just for the visit, then. I could handle that. Just for the visit," I said.

"No expectations?" he asked.

"None. I'll just make some supper, and I'll do your laundry while we do homework. It'll be good. You'll see," I said, "Please."

"All right. We'll try it. We have to try it sometime. I'll be over after my shower, okay?" he asked.

"Great. I'll have supper ready. What do you want?" I asked.

"Whatever you make is fine by me," he said. "Don't go to any trouble."

We walked out of the office after paying for the ultrasound and the visit. Then we walked back to the car. He dropped me off by the house, and then he went back to football practice. I went inside and started cleaning the house. I wanted it to be spotless when he came over, and I hadn't cleaned it since he'd left. Then I went into the kitchen and pulled out some pork chops to thaw. It was one of his favorite meals, and I wanted everything to be good for him.

I timed everything to be ready about thirty minutes after we would normally get home. He wasn't but about ten minutes later than that. He brought in his bag of dirty clothes, and put it into the laundry room. I immediately went in and sorted out the clothes, putting in a load of lights. Then I came back into the kitchen and put supper on the table.

"Pork chops. I told you not to go to any trouble," he said.

"It wasn't any trouble, and I know you like them," I said.

"Well, thank you. They're awesome," he said, taking a bite.

"You're welcome."

We ate in companionable silence. When we were finished, he helped me with the dishes, and we knocked them out in no time. It was nice to be working together again. By then, his whites were done, and I went to put them in the dryer and started a load of darks. He met me in the doorway of the laundry room, and, when I turned around from the washer, he was standing behind me. He took me into his arms, and I leaned into him, wrapping my arms around him. He leaned over and rested his chin on the top of my head. I didn't wanna do anything to upset his mood, so I stood there until he withdrew from the embrace.

"Come on, we've got homework to do," he said, his voice kind of rough.

"Yeah," I agreed. I took his hand, and he let me have it. I led him back through the house to our bedroom where we always did our homework. He hesitated before we went inside. "Well, come on in. I won't bite. Much."

He laughed and went to his desk. He started pulling out his books, and looking around the room, he finally sat down. "Starting with calculus?" he asked.

"Sure," I said, taking out my calculus book.

We worked for several hours. It felt good to have him back, to go over things with…to talk to him. At some point during our homework, I got up and changed out his laundry again. I folded his whites and put his darks on to dry. He told me thank you because he'd forgotten all about it. When the dryer went off again, I went to finish his laundry. He again followed me to the laundry room. I got everything folded for him, and I put everything into a clean bag for him to take with him. He thanked me again, and that time he wrapped me in his arms. I turned to face him, and returned the hug. I laid my head onto his chest, and he stroked my hair. I turned my face to look up at him, and he leaned down and kissed me on the forehead. I held my breath, and he leaned down farther, and he kissed me on the lips. I returned the kiss, although it was chaste, and his hand cupped the back of my head. We stood there several minutes, just kissing, chastely, and with me not making a move. When he broke the kiss, he was nervous. He was stammering, and his cheeks were reddened.

"Why are you embarrassed?" I asked.

"I told myself I wasn't gonna do that," he said.

"Why not? We are married. We're allowed to kiss, and we do love each other. It's okay. No one is gonna get mad at us for a little kiss. In fact, they would all probably jump for joy," I said.

"That's why, Bella." He pulled back and turned away from me.

"Oh, No, Edward. I don't plan on telling anyone anything. I swear it. They don't even know you're over tonight. Nobody does. I swear it. Just you and me know what's going on, and I don't plan on telling anyone else. I promise."

"You haven't told anyone I was coming over tonight?"

"No, no one. I swear it. And I wasn't planning on it. It's our business, right?"

"Right." He turned back towards me and took me back into his arms. "Bella, I don't like our business being spread all over kingdom come. It's up to us to work this out, not anyone else. You and me, Bella."

"I can accept that, Edward, as long as we work on it. You staying at the hotel isn't us working on it. I want you to move back here so we can begin again."

"I'm not ready, yet. I still have a lot to think about. Maybe I could come over again to do homework tomorrow night?"

"Yes, that would be great. I wish you would consider staying."

"Don't push this, Bella, or I won't come back."

"Okay. I just want you to know one thing. Your baby and I need you, Edward."

"I know that, and I'm working on it. I'm working on trusting you again, Bella. Until I do, however, I can't live here."

"Okay. I'll see you in the morning. Drive safely."

"Yeah, I will. I'll see you in the morning." He gathered his clothes and walked out the front door. I heard the car start up, and he backed out of the driveway. I heard him pull out into the street, and I fell back against the door. It was a good night, though it ended too soon. I hated the fact he'd left again, but at least he'd kissed me. That was progress, wasn't it?


	12. Chapter 12

Disclaimer – Stephenie Meyers owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.

A special thanks goes out to my beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 12

Realizations

EPOV

As I drove away from my home and the woman I loved, I thought about the events of the day. The ultrasound had gone well, and our baby was still healthy. It looked like a little bean. We hadn't seen an ultrasound of Victoria at that stage, and I was amazed that a baby could grow from the little bean on the ultrasound at this stage of Bella's pregnancy. Then I went back to football practice. We ran some new routes, and they worked out great. Jasper and I were shoo ins to any college in the area according to Coach Davis, assuming we could keep Jasper's grades up this year. Then there was the visit with Bella. I really didn't want to give her the wrong idea by kissing her. I didn't want to let myself get all emotional over being home because I was afraid I wouldn't be able to leave when the time came. She was just so appealing to me. It had been so long since I'd kissed her, and she was so beautiful. She was so enticing. I wanted to do more, and I'm glad I was able to stop while I was ahead. It was why I ran like a scared puppy. And I committed to going back the next night! How were we going to work things out if I couldn't keep my hands off of her? How were we going to be able to talk through our problems if every time we were together, I wanted to touch her and worse?

I made it back to the hotel in no time. I put up my clean clothes and got into bed, but sleep kept evading me. I kept replaying the kiss over and over. It was wonderful. I knew if I started going back over there, there was no way I would be able to stop my passion from taking over. How were we ever going to work through our problems? I couldn't figure it out. What I would give to be in bed with my wife at that moment, but our problems weren't fixed, and, at that point in time, my attraction for her was mostly physical. That wouldn't do.

I must have fallen asleep, because my dreams of Bella were of better times, times when our child had been born, and we were living as a happy family, the three of us, together. When my wake-up call came from the front desk, I got up and got dressed for school.

I made it in plenty of time, and I waited for Bella at our lockers. She finally arrived, and I leaned over to talk to her. Instead, I ended up kissing her, chastely, on the lips.

"What brought that on?" she asked.

"I just felt like kissing my wife. I had a good time last night," I said. "And I can't wait until tonight."

"I had a good time, too. What would you like for supper?"

"Surprise me," I said, taking her hand in mine. We walked that way to our first class. I walked her to her seat, and then I took mine. There were some whispers from our classmates, but I ignored them. We were well prepared for our classes, and I held Bella's hand as we walked from class to class. I decided it wouldn't hurt to stand with the gang at break, either, so when morning break rolled around, I walked up to the three of them.

"May I join you?" I asked.

"Sure," Bella said, and Jasper shook my hand.

"Are you sure, Bella? You don't wanna get hurt again," Alice said.

"Alice, butt out," Bella said. "This is a move in the right direction." She took my hand, and I let her hold it. She brought it up to her mouth and kissed the back of it. I didn't stop her, but I didn't reciprocate.

We talked about a variety of things, not our relationship or about our getting together later on. Bella was invited to go shopping with Alice after school, but she turned her down. I realized what a big step it was for Bella, and I appreciated the gesture.

The whispers continued during lunch as I took my seat at our usual table. Bella and I sat side by side, and I held her hand during lunch. It felt good to be touching her again, and I missed the days when we touched each other without it meaning anything special. When the bell rang for the end of lunch, I never let go of her hand, and I pulled her back, letting Jasper and Alice go on ahead.

"Bella, would you like for me to take you out for supper tonight? It would be fine with me if we went out instead of you having to cook," I whispered to her.

"If it's all the same with you, I'd rather cook for you. I'd rather have the alone time with you," she said. I nodded. I could see her point. We didn't need the public around us when we talked.

"Okay. If you're sure you don't mind cooking," I said.

"It's a small price to pay in order to be alone with you," she said, and she squeezed my hand. We walked to our next class together, and I walked her to her desk, to the fascination of the class. We were truly the talk of the school.

After school, I went to football practice, and Alice took Bella home. I had a hard time keeping my mind on practice. I kept thinking of what I wanted to tell Bella when I got home. Coach called me on it after practice, calling me back after everyone else had headed to the locker room to change.

"Cullen, hold on a minute, please," Coach Davis said.

"Yes, Coach," I said as I hung back from the rest of the team. I knew that I was busted, and I was worried about what he was going to say to me.

"Where were you this afternoon, Edward?" he asked me.

"With Bella, Coach," I answered him. The truth had always been my way, and I wasn't about to start lying.

"Things not going well?" he asked.

"Things may be looking up for the first time in a long time, Coach. I'm going over for supper," I said.

"What do you mean, 'going over?' Where have you been going after practice?" he asked.

"Not home. Not for this week. I've been staying at the hotel since the weekend. I don't wanna talk about it, please," I said. "I just wanna get home to Bella tonight."

"Edward, you know how I feel about players not being on their game," he said.

"Yes, Sir," I said. "I know. I'm sorry, and I promise that I'll do better tomorrow."

"You'd better. I'll still bench you, and you know I'll do it, right?"

"Yes, Sir. I believe you," I said.

"Look, Edward. You're the best natural talent I've ever coached. You can go far, possibly even further than college ball. I've never told a student that before. But you, you can do it, if you get your personal life in order. No college scout is gonna want to take on someone with your baggage."

"Coach, I've got another baby on the way. Don't you think I wanna fix this with Bella? It's all I think about. It's all I dream about at night. My family is the most important thing to me, more important than playing college ball," I said.

"Then what's keeping the two of you apart? If she's so important to you, then go make things right, Edward. Don't let little things stand in your way," he said.

"I know, Coach, but even though I have the best intentions, something always happens to set me off again. She'll do something or say something that infuriates me, and I leave again," I said. "But I have high hopes that tonight will be different."

"Well, you'd better get going then," he said.

"Yes, Sir. Thanks for the talk,"

"And Edward, I want you mind on practice tomorrow, or you're gonna be benched."

"Yes, Sir," I said as I jogged to the locker room. I changed as fast as I could and then drove to the hotel where I took a quick shower and then headed towards home. I knew I was going to be later than Bella expected, so I gave her a quick call.

"Bella, I'm sorry, but I'm running late," I said when she answered.

"Thanks for calling. I'll hold off on putting the bread on," she said.

"What are we having for supper?"

"Spaghetti. I know how much you like it."

"Yeah, I love your spaghetti. Thanks. I'm turning onto our street now."

"Okay, I'll put in the bread."

"Bye, I love you."

"I love you, too."

Five minutes later, I was pulling into our driveway. She'd left the lights on, and I carried my book bag to the door with me. I walked in without knocking, and the house smelled wonderful. I dropped my books in the foyer, and I headed to the kitchen where I found Bella stirring the spaghetti. I looked at the bread in the oven, and it was ready, so I grabbed a pot holder and took it out, dishing it into a bread basket.

"Thanks," she said.

"No problem," I said. She took the spaghetti and put it on the table. We sat down and ate with little in the way of communication. I told her how good it was; she always made the best spaghetti. I took seconds, and then thirds.

She smiled when I took the third helping, and blushing, she said, "I had forgotten how much you could eat. I hope I made enough."

"You made plenty. I was just hungry," I smiled at her, turning red with embarrassment.

When I finished, we got up and cleaned up the kitchen together. It was nice to be working side by side again. When she put up the final plate, I grabbed her around the waist and hugged her. I rested my head on top of hers, and then I spun her around in my arms. I tilted her face up with one hand, and with the other one on her lower back, I leaned down and kissed her, firmly and passionately. I took one hand and placed it behind her head, and then I let my tongue seek out hers. She responded instantly, and we deepened our kiss to allow our tongues to dance with each other. She reached her arms up to encircle my neck, pulling herself closer to me. I eventually broke the kiss, pulling away from her.

"That was amazing," I said. "Thank you."

"No, thank you."

"We'd better get busy on our homework, or we may not get there tonight," I said.

"Yeah, we'd better. And then maybe we can talk a little later, okay?"

"Yeah, okay," I said.

We went directly to our bedroom, and that time I didn't hesitate before I went to my desk. We did our homework, and we finished around ten thirty. I repacked my book bag, and we went into the den and sat on the couch. I took her hand in mine, and I sat on the couch facing her.

"Bella, I love you so much, and I hate being away from you. I want to work this out with you, and I'm willing to forgive and forget everything that has gone wrong between us lately. The only thing I'm gonna ask is that you don't discuss our lives with anyone. We have a family, and we're about to expand on it. We have to be able to take care of our own problems, not go ask everyone else their opinions. Can you do that for me?"

"Edward, I didn't mean to discuss our problems with the world. I just wanted help to get us back on the right track. I didn't think you'd hold it against me to talk to my best friend about the things that were bothering me. I didn't grow up with a mom to talk to or to have as an example. I only had your mom, and I felt like I could talk to your parents like they were mine, especially your mom. I didn't feel like I was going behind your back, and I'm so sorry!"

"What about what started all of this? Are you gonna hold the miscarriage against me?"

"I don't understand why you don't feel the way I do, but you are entitled to your own beliefs. I can't enforce my beliefs on you, and it's taken me a while to figure that out."

"Are you sure? I don't wanna move back in here and face a stone wall."

"Please move back in, for my sake and for the baby. I'm not sleeping good. I hear everything moving in the night. I'm scared to move around the house at night. I'm ready to call Dad to come over and look around the house by three am 'cause I'm sure that there's something out there."

"So you want me back so you won't be scared?"

"No! Well, that's one reason. But the main reason is because I miss you, and the baby misses you. I love you so much, Edward. My life isn't complete without you."

"My life isn't complete without you, either. Can I come home?"

"When?"

"Tonight. I brought my things, and I was hoping that we could talk things out tonight."

"Yes! Please! Let me help you bring your things in."

"No, you stay inside. I'll get them." I stood, and so did she. She stood on her tiptoes and reached up to hug me. I leaned over to kiss her, and we pressed up against each other like it was the first time we'd really kissed. We kissed like new lovers. I finally broke the kiss and said, "Let me go get my things." She nodded.

I left the living room, went to the car, and got my clothes and toiletries. I brought them back inside and into the bedroom and master bathroom. Bella followed me and helped me put my things back up. Then she took me in her arms and reached up to kiss me again. It felt good to be back in her arms where I belonged. After we broke the kiss, we got dressed for bed, me dressed conservatively, and Bella dressed in one of her nightshirts. I crawled into bed next to Bella, and took her into my arms, pulling her head onto my chest.

"Are you still spotting?" I asked.

"No, I stopped spotting about a week and a half ago. I've been fine since then," she said.

"Except for the morning sickness?"

"You mean the all day sickness? Yeah, except for that. I've been having to get up an hour early just so I'll be okay to get to school. I've been throwing up left and right. The phenergan isn't really helping."

"Have you told Dr. Bush, yet?"

"No, not yet."

"Why not? Maybe there's something she can do?"

"I haven't had a ride to go to another appointment."

"Oh, Bella! I'm so, so sorry. I told you that I'd buy you a car of your own, and I need to do that. You need to be able to get anywhere you need to be. You don't need to be counting on me for a ride. But you know all you had to do was tell me, right? No matter what, I was always there for you and the baby."

"Yes, I knew it, but I don't know what else she could do."

"Bella, no offense, but you're not a doctor. Let's see if she knows anything else, okay."

"Yeah, okay, but I don't need a car. One is enough for the two of us."

"Well, I don't think so. Besides, I've gotta get mine fixed. It's too much of a reminder of what's gone wrong with our lives."

"You know you scared me to death that day, don't you? I thought you'd had an accident, and I was worried that you'd been hurt."

"I was hurt that day, Bella, just not physically."

"I know. I'm sorry."

"Let's not talk about it. We need to get some sleep."

"Okay, night, Edward."

"Night, Bella. I love you."

"I love you, too."

The next morning came too soon, and I got up and went to get Bella some crackers and Coke for her upset stomach. It didn't matter, and I ended up holding back her hair while she vomited in the toilet. She was sick for almost two hours before it settled down enough for her to get a shower and get dressed. She wasn't ever that sick with Victoria. I was worried about her and the fact that she was loosing weight. I wanted her to go to the doctor…and soon. I don't know why she didn't bring it up at her appointment just a couple of days before.

While I got my shower, Bella got ready. As soon as I got dressed, she had breakfast on the table, despite the fact that she wasn't able to eat it. "Thank you," I said. "I'm so sorry you feel so badly."

"It's nothing new. I've been this way since before you left. You just didn't notice, you were so mad at me at the time," she said.

"Well, there's no excuse for that. I'm so sorry, Bella. I really am," I said.

"It's okay, Edward. Those were hard times, and we're starting over. I'm not gonna dwell on those times, and you aren't either, right?" Bella said.

"Right. Did you think to call Alice and tell her you don't need a ride this morning?" I asked.

"Yeah. I called while you were in the shower. I told her you were here, and you were taking me in. I didn't tell her anything else, I promise."

"You had to tell her something to explain why you didn't need the ride. Did she try and talk you out of seeing me again?" I asked

"No, she just told me to take things slowly and talk everything out. She doesn't want my hormones to take over and do my talking for me."

"What hormones? The ones that make you wanna do this . . . ?" I said, and I swept her into my arms and kissed her soundly.

"Yeah, those hormones," she said, after we mutually broke the kiss several minutes later.

"Oh, I don't know, those hormones talk pretty well."

"You beast!" she said as she pushed me away, laughing. "We've gotta go or we're gonna be late."

"Yeah, I really wanna skip today, though. I wanna continue to work things out with you. I think that we've made great progress, and I wanna keep it up," I said.

"We've gotta go to school, Edward. You know we do," Bella said.

"Yeah, I know," I said. "I just don't have to like it today."

We got in the car together for the first time in almost a week, and it felt good. Once again, I held her hand like we were dating. Every once in a while, I would take her hand to my mouth and kiss it. She would do the same, and it felt good. When we pulled into the parking lot together, we were the subject of stares. I went around and helped Bella out of the car, leading her to our lockers. I could hear several of the people talking behind our backs, wondering if we were back together. I didn't think it was any of their business, so I just kept walking, a smile on my face.

Alice met Bella at our lockers. "Are you all right?" she asked.

"Of course I'm okay. In fact, I'm better than okay. The phenergan seems to be working this morning. I'm not really nauseated right now," Bella said.

"You know what I mean, Bella Cullen! Are you and Edward okay?" Alice asked, pressing the issue.

"Alice, you know the major part of what made Edward so upset was that I was talking about our business with other people. I'm not gonna make that same mistake now," Bella said, and I took her arm and gave her a kiss, chaste enough for the hallways of the school, but a kiss none the less. I hoped Alice got the message.

"But I'm your best friend. I've stood beside you during this whole mess," Alice said.

"Yes, and I appreciate that, but you've gotta back off now and be my friend. Just know we're working things out, okay. That's all the information I can give you," Bella said.

"Okay, if that's the way you're gonna be. I'll be waiting the next time you two have a fight," Alice said.

"Hopefully, there won't be a next time," Bella said, and she turned to me and shut her locker door. "Walk me to class?" she asked.

"Definitely," I said, and taking her hand into mine, I led the way to the beginning of our school day which went great with Bella by my side.

Practice went better that afternoon. We had an away game the next night, and I was able to keep my mind "on the game" as Coach would've said. We worked hard, and even though we worked later than normal, it was a good workout. Bella stayed in the stands during the workout, waiting for me like usual, before we were fighting. Every so often, I would look up into the stands and see her sitting there. Then I would bring my focus back where it belonged, on the football field.

When practice was over, Coach Davis called me over to the sidelines. "You did better today. Could the reason be the young lady sitting in the stands?"

"Yeah, Coach. We're back together as of last night," I said. "It feels right, though we have a long way to go before everything is perfect."

"Well, I don't think I've ever threatened to bench anyone as often as I've threatened to bench you, Cullen, but you pulled it out again."

"Thanks, Coach. Can I get to Bella, now?"

"Sure, Edward, and congratulations."

I nodded at him and ran to the stands where Bella was waiting. "What was that all about?" Bella asked.

"He told me I'm not benched for the game tomorrow night. I didn't do so well in practice yesterday. My mind was on you," I told her.

"Oh, Edward, you know how nervous I get when you play, but for you to play and not be concentrating on the game. That's not acceptable."

"Yeah, you know Coach agrees with you on that point. I don't know how many times he's already threatened to bench me this year, and you know he'll do it."

"I don't know, Edward. I'm beginning to think that he's full of a lot of hot air and a whole lot of bluff. He says he's gonna bench you, and you get your mind on the game. I don't think he'd do it in reality. He needs you too much."

"He benched me when you got hurt, remember?" I said.

"Yeah, we were up by seventy points, remember?" she said.

"But I've never been benched since, no matter what the lead," I said.

"Well, he should bench you when we lead them by so much. You could get hurt," she said.

"Bella, I'm gonna go change, and then we can go home. Sound good?" I asked.

"Yes, sounds great!" she said.

After we made it home, we cooked supper together. Then we talked over our day while we ate. Bella even admitted how persistent Alice was being about our personal lives. What a breakthrough! After cleaning the kitchen, we started on our homework. It didn't take as long as usual, so we were able to snuggle on the couch for a while before we went to bed. We kissed each other quite a bit, just like you would on a date, only we didn't have to worry about parents barging in on us. We went to bed at a decent hour, and fell asleep in each other's arms.

Friday rolled around, bright and early. I was awakened by the sounds of Bella vomiting again. We really needed to get her to the doctor. I got up and went to her. She looked so pale, clammy, just like a ghost. I took her into my arms as I pulled her hair back.

"Bella, I love you. I'm so sorry this is happening to you."

"You can't help it. It's all part of having this baby."

"Yeah, but I can be sorry you feel so badly." She threw up again, and I stood to get her some water to rinse her mouth. "Here, sweetheart, try this." She rinsed her mouth out and immediately vomited again. "I'm gonna call Dad to come over and give you a shot, okay?"

"Isn't that getting someone else involved in our business?"

"Bella, you're sick. You need something so you can quit vomiting. You need some help. If Dad can help you, then I don't see why I shouldn't call him. Okay?"

"Okay. This has gotta stop. You're right."

I got up and got my cell. I called Dad and told him what was happening and asked him if he could come over and give Bella a shot to stop the vomiting. He said he'd be right over. I held Bella on the floor of the bathroom until I heard him knock on the front door. I released my hold on her and went downstairs to let him in. He followed me upstairs to see Bella leaning over the toilet vomiting again.

"How long has this been going on?" he asked.

"About two and a half hours," Bella answered.

"And it happens every day?" he asked.

"Yes, Sir. Every day. Most of the day I'm nauseated," she said.

"Why hasn't Dr. Bush given you anything stronger than phenergan for the nausea?" Dad asked.

"Because Bella hasn't told her about it," I said.

"Bella, for your health and the health of the baby, you've got to tell Dr. Bush. This vomiting isn't healthy for either one of you. I'm going to give you a shot of Zofran. It should knock out the nausea and the vomiting," Dad said.

"Yes, Sir," Bella said.

Dad gave her the shot, and she rested against me. After another fifteen minutes, she said that she felt good enough to stand up and try to take her shower. I wouldn't have any of that. She was so weak, I was afraid she would fall in the shower, so I got in with her. I washed her off and then quickly bathed myself. Then I got her out of the shower and toweled her dry. I left her leaning on the sink while I toweled off. Then I helped her into the bedroom where I helped her get dressed. I got dressed afterwards, and then we made our way to the front of the house. I grabbed a couple of breakfast bars which I wolfed down in no time, and I asked Bella if she could keep anything down. She said she'd try a banana, so I got her one to go. I carried our books to the car, and then I came back and carried her to the car. It was against my better judgment, but Bella insisted on going to school.

We arrived late, and we had to go to the office for a tardy slip. Mrs. Hope was there and asked us why we were late.

"Bella was sick this morning," I said. "Dad had to come over to give her a shot for the nausea."

"Oh, I'm terribly sorry to hear that, Bella dear. Are you feeling better now?" Mrs. Hope asked.

"Yes, Ma'am. I'm just weak," Bella said.

"Okay, you both know these are unexcused tardies, right?" Mrs. Hope said.

"Yes, Ma'am. We understand but better late than never," I said.

"Okay, here you go. Now get to class," Mrs. Hope said. We walked out of the office and straight to our calculus class. Mrs. Sims didn't look too happy to be interrupted, and she took our tardy slips with a grim look on her face.

"Okay, you two. Take your seats," she said, and then she went ahead with teaching the class. At the end of class, she asked us both to stay after. "What's going on with the two of you? Why were you late this morning?"

"I was sick and couldn't leave. Carlisle had to come over to give me a shot. This time the morning sickness is a lot worse," Bella said.

"Okay. Have you tried crackers and Coke before you get out of bed?" Mrs. Sims asked.

"Oh, yes, Ma'am. I don't even get that far. I wake up having to vomit immediately," Bella said. "It wakes me up."

"Oh dear, that's worse than I ever had. In the future, if you're ever late, don't go to the office, just come straight here. Three unexcused tardies count for an unexcused absence, and neither of you need that on your records," Mrs. Sims said. "We'll take care of it here in class. Now, I need your homework."

"Thank you, Mrs. Sims," I said, and we turned in our homework. Then we headed to our next class. The rest of the day went pretty well. The shot did wonders for Bella. She didn't get sick again all day.

By the time we had to gather for the busses for the away game, Bella had decided she didn't feel like going. I agreed with her one hundred percent. She was still weak, and she needed the rest. I thought going to the game would be too taxing for her, so I was glad she made the decision to stay behind, not that I wouldn't miss her. I drove to the school and got on the bus. The guys asked about Bella, and I told them that she wasn't feeling well as I made my way to my seat in the back of the bus across from Jasper and Alice. It was strange to be around them, especially without Bella. I knew that Alice was still angry with me over everything that had gone down between Bella and me, but that was gonna have to change, especially if they planned on spending the weekend at our place. I wouldn't have her going behind my back in my own house.

The first thing out of Alice's mouth when I sat down was, "Where is Bella?"

"She doesn't feel well. She decided to stay home and rest. We both agreed that the trip would be too much for her," I said.

"You both agreed, or you told her?" Alice asked.

"Alice, don't do this. She told me, and I agreed. Okay?" I said. "Hey Jasper, are you guys coming over this weekend?"

"Are you two sure you need the company? You've just moved back home, man," he said.

"It's okay with me, and I'm sure it would be okay with Bella. The only thing is she is sick, and I mean very sick with this pregnancy. If you don't wanna see that, you may not wanna come over. She says it's lasting all day, the nausea anyway," I said.

"Shouldn't you know that?" Alice piped in.

"Alice, we're doing the best we can right now. Things are getting better, and we don't need you trying to make trouble. Understand?" I said.

"Yeah, Edward. I understand that you hurt my best friend, and I told you two years ago if you hurt her, I'd make you pay. This is me making you pay," Alice said.

"Alice, you had it wrong back then. Bella and I worked that situation out, and by God, we'll work this one out, too, if you'll just butt out," I said.

"Alice, he's right. Please just leave this alone. There's no reason for you to get so involved in their personal lives. Please!" Jasper said.

"Rosalie is on our side, too," Alice said. "I've kept her informed of everything that's been going on, and Emmett's ready to kick your ass."

"Jasper, I've had enough of your girlfriend. I can't believe that she's brought Rosalie and Emmett into this, too. It's bad enough you two know about what's going on, but now Rosalie and Emmett! You'd better keep me away from her. Maybe you'd better stay away this weekend after all," I said.

"Yeah, that may be a wise decision," Jasper said.

"Look man, you can still come over, and Bella and I'll work on your ACT prep with you. We don't mind at all. Just leave your girl behind. Okay?"

"No, I'd better not do that. It might make her mad. She can help me," he said.

"But will she, or will you two just make out?" I asked.

"Making out is so much better than studying," he said.

"Yeah, but there is a time for studying and a time for making out, and tomorrow afternoon is a time for studying. Look, Bella and I'll be expecting you for lunch, and then we'll study until time for the UW game, okay?"

"Well, I don't know," he said.

"It's not an option. The exam is only three weekends away. You have to study. Period. If you must, bring Alice with you. She and Bella can go plot or shop or something. You and I are gonna study," I said, putting my foot down.

"Yeah, okay. What time is lunch? And will Bella be up to cooking?" he asked.

"It may be sandwiches, and I may be the cook," I said.

"That's fine by me," he said.

"Then eleven o'clock," I said.

"AM?"

"Yes, AM, you party animal. There's no after game party tonight, so you should be able to get up on time."

"Okay, eleven o'clock it is," he said.

We talked about random things the rest of the way to the ballgame, and it went great. We ended up winning our sixth game of the season by the score of 56 – 7. Jasper was great, breaking tackles left and right. All I had to do was get him the ball, and he was off to the races.

The ride home was lonely. Jasper and Alice were making out the whole trip home, and I was left to stew over Bella's and my relationship. We were definitely making progress, but I didn't know when I'd be comfortable touching her again, in a sexual way. It was almost like we were dating again, and that felt weird. The drive home took a couple of hours, and by the time we got home, it was already after midnight. I told Jasper and Alice and some of the other guys good night, and got in the car to go home. It took me fifteen minutes to get home, and when I pulled up into the driveway, I was shocked to see the lights still on. I got out of the car and headed into the house, calling for Bella. When she didn't answer, I figured she'd fallen asleep while waiting up on me, so I made my way to the master bedroom. When she wasn't in the bed, I became worried. I looked in the master bath, and found her lying on the floor next to the toilet. I tried to wake her up, but I wasn't able to rouse her. I grabbed my cell and called 911. I told them that my wife was passed out on the bathroom floor, that she'd been vomiting all day, and that she was eight weeks pregnant. They said they'd send an ambulance to get her. I hung up the phone and called Dad. I repeated what I'd told the 911 operator, and he said he'd meet us at the ER.

It didn't take long for the ambulance to arrive, and I led them to the bathroom where Bella was still lying because I was afraid to move her. They asked why she was in the floor, and I told them I'd been at the football game, and I'd just gotten home and found her that way. I didn't know if she'd fallen or had lain down, so I was afraid to move her. They picked Bella up and put her on the gurney, and then they took her to the ambulance. They offered to let me ride with them, and I sat up front while they were working on her in the back. I turned around to watch them the whole way to the hospital. They started an IV in her hand, hanging a bag of clear liquid after they took her vital signs. Then they called the ER and gave them a report on her condition. I didn't understand what they said, but it sounded bad to me. I was so worried about her; I couldn't believe that I'd ever left her home alone. What if she'd passed out before I'd moved back in? It could have been very bad. She could have laid there for several hours, if not days, before she had been found.

They wheeled Bella into the ER, and I followed. The nurses stopped me as I was walking after them so I could fill out Bella's paperwork. I stopped at the check in area and told them our information. I gave them our insurance information, and I told them that her doctor was Dr. Bush. Then the ER doctor came to get me. He needed information about Bella and her history. I followed him to her room and told him that she was eight and a half weeks pregnant and had been vomiting nonstop. I also told him that I thought that it had been better that day because Dad had given her the shot of Zofran earlier that morning. He asked me who my dad was, and I told him just as Dad walked into the room. He walked directly to me, and he hugged me. He started speaking to the ER doctor in doctor terminology, and I went to Bella and took her hand. He told the ER doctor that he'd already notified Dr. Bush we were on our way. I looked up at Dad, and he walked over to me.

"Why is she unconscious?" I asked him.

"Well, her mind has shut down so that her body can try to heal," Dad said. "She's going to be okay. Just give the fluids time to get into her system."

"Is this hurting the baby?" I asked.

"It isn't good for the baby," he answered.

"Is she gonna lose it?" I asked.

"No, Edward, but this is a lot of stress on the baby and her. You should've told me she was so sick this morning. I thought she was just having a little vomiting, not this much," he said.

"I didn't know it was this bad. She's been keeping it from me, I guess," I said. "It's all my fault. She hasn't wanted to worry me. I should have been more observant."

"It's nobody's fault. She's a young mother, and these things happen." At that moment, Bella started stirring. I squeezed her hand, and she squeezed mine back.

"Bella, sweetheart, are you all right? Wake up for me, honey. It's Edward," I said.

"Edward, where am I?" she asked.

"You're at the hospital, sweetheart. You passed out on the bathroom floor," I said.

"Really? I don't remember that," she said.

"It's okay. You've got an IV in, and they're giving you some fluids. How are you feeling?" I asked.

"A little better, I think. I'm a little nauseated, though," she said.

"I'll go and get the doctor," I said.

"You stay put, Edward. I'll go tell him," Dad said.

"Thanks, Dad," I said. Just then, Dr. Bush came into the room.

"Just what do we have here? Bella, Edward, what's happened?" she asked.

"Bella has been vomiting a whole lot. She passed out on the bathroom floor tonight while I was at the ballgame. I found her there when I got home," I said.

"Bella, why didn't you mention this to me during your appointment earlier this week?" she asked.

"I didn't want to worry you with a little morning sickness, even if it was going on all day," Bella said.

"It's what I'm there for, Bella. You should have let me know," Dr. Bush said. "I need an ultrasound machine, please," she said to the nurse who had accompanied her into the room.

"Yes, Doctor," the nurse said, and she left the room.

"Is the baby all right?" Bella asked.

"Well, we're going to find out," Dr. Bush said. Then when the nurse came back into the room, Dr. Bush said, "Can you give her 32 mg of Zofran IV now."

"Yes, Ma'am. Right away," the nurse said, and she immediately left the room and was back seconds later with a syringe which she slowly injected in Bella's IV. In the meantime, Dr. Bush had raised Bella's gown, put a towel over Bella's panties, and fired up the ultrasound machine. She was looking at the baby, and humming an upbeat tune.

"Well, is everything okay?" I asked.

"Yes, Edward. Everything looks just fine. The baby has a strong heartbeat and doesn't appear to be stressed at all," Dr. Bush said.

"Thank God," I said, squeezing Bella's hand again. Bella had tears running down her face, and I leaned over to kiss each one off. Then I kissed her on the lips. She turned her head, and I was confused. We'd been this far before, and I didn't know why she was pulling away from me now.

"What's wrong, Bella?" I asked, a hint of frustration in my voice.

"I haven't even washed my mouth out from the last time I threw up, much less brushed my teeth," she whispered. I leaned over and kissed her on the lips again. Nothing was going to keep me away from my wife from that day forward. Nothing. I rested my forehead against hers.

"I love you, Bella Cullen," I said.

"I love you, too, Edward Cullen," she said.

"Okay, let's get you admitted, Bella," Dr. Bush said.

"Admitted?" Bella asked. "You mean I have to stay? Why can't I just go home?"

"You have to get this vomiting under control before you can go home, Bella, dear. You'll be in here for a few days at the least."

"A few? How many are we talking?" I asked.

"At least through the weekend, and maybe into next week. We'll have to see how she does," Dr. Bush said.

"Okay. Bella, will you be okay while I go home and get a couple of changes of clothes? I'll be right back," I asked.

"No, you go home and sleep in our bed. You don't need to stay here. I'll be fine," Bella said.

"Absolutely not! I don't wanna leave your side, but Dad is here, and he can drive me home to get the car so I can come back later tonight. Otherwise, I'll have to call someone to take me home," I said.

"Edward, I don't want you to come back tonight. You can come back in the morning," Bella said. "There's nothing you can do here."

"I can hold your hand. Besides, you'd be much more comfortable in your own gowns, wouldn't you?" I asked, knowing that would be the deciding factor.

"Yes, I would," she hesitated, "but I can always suffer through one night of a backless gown."

"Don't be ridiculous," I said. "I'm going to come back. I've been gone from you long enough. Long enough for forever." She nodded. I went to ask Dad if he would take me by the house, and of course, he said he would. We waited until they gave us a room number for Bella, and then we left. As soon as I got home, I went straight to the bedroom and packed a bag for myself. I remembered to pack her a couple of night shirts and both of our toiletries, and then I headed straight back to the hospital. The night guard didn't want to let me in, but I told him that my wife had been admitted through the ER earlier that evening. He had to check it out, and he finally, after thirty minutes, let me through.

I made it to Bella's room about two a.m., and Bella was curled up in the bed asleep. The medications must have sedated her, so I put down my bag, and I pulled out the reclining chair and lay down for the night.

It wasn't three hours later when I was awakened by a feeble, "Edward." I jumped up from the chair and raced to her side where she was desperately trying to get out of the bed but couldn't because of all of the tubes connected to her. I could tell Bella was trying to get to the bathroom, so I started looking around for something for her to vomit in. I grabbed the first thing I could find, the blue basin they always give you when you check into the hospital. I tore it opened and threw the water container, the cup, and the tissues onto the bed and held it under her mouth just in time to catch the vomit that she couldn't hold in any longer. I pulled her hair back as I held the basin. She continued to vomit for a full five minutes straight, and I felt so bad for her. She couldn't catch her breath before she was retching again. I managed to push the nurses' call button, and when they answered, I let them know that she was sick.

The nurse came running, and she took the basin from me. I was able to run to the bathroom and wet a washcloth to wash Bella's face with between episodes. When Bella's stomach finally settled down enough for her to lie back down in the bed, the nurse emptied the basin and rinsed it out. She brought it back out to us in case we needed it again, and then she went to get Bella some more Zofran. Bella hadn't vomited anything more by the time the nurse got back with the medication, and after about thirty minutes, she seemed to be more comfortable. The nurse stayed with us until Bella was feeling better, and she asked Bella how long it had been going on.

"For the past two weeks," Bella answered her.

I just held her hand. I should've known the answer to that question, but I hadn't. I'd known she'd been sick, but not that bad, and for the past week, I'd had no idea at all. She could've died, and I'd have been none the wiser. I could kick myself for leaving her like I did…and for nothing. In the grand scheme of things, it was for nothing.

"That's an awful long time to be this sick. Was your first pregnancy this bad?" she asked.

"How did you know I've been pregnant before?" Bella asked.

"Your medical record. It said that you're a G2P0110 which means that this is your second pregnancy. It really doesn't make sense though, because it says you had one pre-term baby and one abortion, and no living children. This would be your third pregnancy then, wouldn't it?"

"No, this is my second. And I've never had an abortion!" Bella said, anger in her voice.

"Where would you get that idea? We've never had an abortion. We don't believe in that," I said. "There must be some mistake."

"Well, the first 0 means term babies, the second number, the 1 means preterm babies, the third number, the 1 generally means abortions, but it could mean miscarriages, and the fourth number means living children, in your case, 0."

"Well, that explains it. I miscarried this baby's twin," Bella said. "And Victoria was stillborn at twenty-six weeks."

"I'm so sorry. I didn't know," the nurse said. "I was just curious."

"Well, they say that curiosity killed the cat," I said, still angry that she'd assumed that we'd aborted our baby. We'd never do such a thing. Bella lost that baby. We didn't kill that baby. Wait. Why was I getting so upset? I was glad we'd lost that baby. Why did it upset me she thought we'd aborted it? Because it was our baby, that's why. Bella had been right all along. That was our BABY that she'd lost. Not some it. Not some tissue. Now I got it, and all it took was some insensitive nurse to make me see it.

Bella reached up and wiped at my eyes. Why did she do that? Was I crying? I didn't think I was, but my nose was running. What's up with that? "Can you please leave?" I asked the nurse. She looked at me, and then she looked back at Bella.

She nodded, and then she said, "I'm sorry," and she walked out the door.

"What's wrong, Edward?" Bella asked, still wiping tears from my face.

"It was a baby, Bella. You were right all along. We lost a baby, not some tissue. Why didn't I see it before? What kind of monster have I been? What kind of freak father have I been? I see it all so clearly now, Bella, and I'm so, so sorry for the way that I treated you."

"Oh, Edward, it's okay. I know what you're feeling, and it will get easier with time. It's okay. Victoria is seeing to her little brother or sister. I know that she is, so it is okay," Bella said to me while taking my hand. She pulled me down to her, and I rested my head on her chest. I could hear her heartbeat, and she ran her fingers through my hair, comforting me the way I was never there to comfort her. She was an angel on earth. I would never leave her side again.


	13. Chapter 13

Disclaimer – Stephenie Meyers owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.

A special thanks goes out to my beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 13

The Hospital

BPOV

I couldn't believe it. My Edward got it. He'd finally figured it out. It was a baby, not some _it_. He was having a hard time dealing with the guilt he was feeling because of his lack of sensitivity when I'd first miscarried, but I tried to reassure him it was all right. He understood, at least, and that was what mattered in the long run. I held him while he cried, while he got out all of his pent up grief. He was such a dichotomy, a six foot two inch, seventeen year old young man who looked like a lost little boy. I held him to my body with his face buried in my shoulder and his arms wrapped around my upper body. He melted into my five foot six inch frame.

After an hour or so, he began to pull himself together, wiping at his eyes, and then blowing his nose. He unwrapped himself from me, and he got out of the bed. He went and sat down in the chair he'd pulled out to sleep in the night before.

"Bella, how do you put up with me?" he asked out of nowhere.

"I love you more than life," I answered.

"I love you, too," he said, quietly, barely breaking a whisper. Then he was silent again for about fifteen minutes. "Bella, do you forgive me?"

"Of course I do," I said. "There's nothing to forgive. You did what you had to do to get to a place where you could come home to me. The big question is do you forgive me?"

"I do. I still want our problems to stay our problems, though. Can you understand that?"

"Not really, but if it is something that you need, then okay. I'll accept it as a part of you."

"Bella, I'm really so sorry for everything that I've put you through. I can't say how much I wish I could take everything back, could take back the pain I've caused you."

"Edward, it's okay. It's all water under the bridge. Forget all about it, and let's start new. We're having a baby, and I couldn't be happier about it, well, except for the morning sickness part." At that point, the nurse brought in breakfast which was liquid and didn't look at all appetizing. There was a broth, a popsicle, and a Sprite on the tray. I picked up the popsicle and tasted it. It was orange, one of my favorite colors, and I nibbled on it for a little bit. That was all it took before it started to come back up. Edward grabbed the pan, and we were able to save the rest of my breakfast tray, though I didn't think I'd be trying much more of it. _Maybe the Sprite a little later_.

Edward called the nurses and told them I hadn't kept down my breakfast, and they came in and gave me some more Zofran. It settled my stomach after about thirty minutes, and Edward had me try some Sprite at that point. I was able to keep it down, and we were both relieved. He climbed in the bed beside me and took me into his arms, cuddling me to him. He held me close while he whispered his love for me over and over. It was a wonderful feeling to be back in his arms again. It was almost as if nothing had transpired between the two of us. I realized how scared he must have been when he found me lying on the bathroom floor the night before, and I held him as close to me as I could, trying to reassure him that I was truly okay.

I must have fallen asleep against him, because his phone ringing woke me up. He apologized as he fumbled to get it out of his pocket.

"Hello," he said.

I could hear Jasper's voice in the background, but I couldn't make out the words he was saying.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, man. We're at the hospital. I found Bella passed out on the bathroom floor when I got home last night, and she's been admitted. We're in room 272. Come on up, and we'll work here."

Jasper talked some more. I could hear him arguing with Edward.

"Bella, would you mind if Jasper came over and we worked on his ACT prep for a little while?" Edward asked me.

"No, not at all. Of course he should come. We need to work on our prep as well," I said.

"Bella said that you should come. Did you hear her? We need to work on ours as well. So it's settled. We'll see you soon," Edward said. "Bye." He hung up the phone and looked at me. "Do you really feel like studying?"

"I do right now. I don't know about later. I generally feel pretty good, at least manageable during school hours," I said.

"Then I'm gonna go downstairs and get our books," Edward said.

"Okay. I'll be fine," I said. He left the room and several minutes later, he came back with both bookbags.

"I remembered to grab the ACT prep books last night."

"Good. We really need to study for that. It's only two weekends from today, right?"

"Yeah. We really don't have much time to work with Jasper. I'm worried about him," Edward said. "I'm worried he won't make the grade. You know how much he isn't into his classes."

"Exactly why he'll do fine. He's always passed without studying, Edward, and now he's putting forth a little effort, he'll do just fine. I have faith in him," I said. "Is Alice with him?"

"He didn't say," Edward said, "but when we made plans to meet today, she wasn't coming. She wasn't the nicest person last night."

"She was just taking up for me, I assume," I said.

"She needs to butt out. I mean it, Bella. You need to tell her before I do. It'll be nicer coming from you, I think," Edward said.

"I know. I'll tell her. I'll try to make her understand. Give me my phone?" I asked.

"Ummm, I don't think I picked it up last night. I'm sorry. You can use mine," he said.

"Thanks, I need to call Charlie and tell him I'm here." Edward gave me his phone, and I dialed Charlie's number.

"Edward, what can I do for you this Saturday morning?" Dad said.

"Charlie, it's me. I borrowed Edward's phone to call you. I have some bad news. I'm in the hospital. I've been throwing up too much, and Edward found me passed out in the bathroom when he got home from the game last night. Dr. Bush admitted me for fluids and to get the vomiting under control."

"Oh my God! Do you need me to come to the hospital, Bella, baby?" Charlie said.

"No, Charlie. I'm all right, and Edward is taking good care of me."

"Well, let me know how you're doing, okay?" Charlie said.

"Of course. That's why I called. Oh, Charlie, someone's beeping in, so I've gotta go. I love you."

"Love you, too. Bye," Charlie said.

"Bye, Charlie." I hung up the phone and handed it to Edward so he could answer it.

"Hello," Edward said. "Oh, hi, Alice. Yeah, she's right here. No she doesn't have her phone with her. Hold on. Here she is." He handed the phone to me.

"Hi, Alice. How are you?" I asked.

"How am I? How are you? I can't believe that you didn't call me when they took you to the hospital. You could have called no matter what time it was," Alice said.

"I wasn't exactly conscious," I said. "Edward called 911, and they brought me in by ambulance."

"Then Edward should have called me. I'm your best friend, and I should have known."

"I didn't get admitted to a room until after two a.m., and we didn't even call Charlie until just now. Edward took good care of me, Alice, and that's the way it should have been. We're back together, Alice, for good this time, and he's taking care of me."

"Sure, he'll just turn and run the next time he gets his panties in a wad. I'm the one who's always been there for you, Bella," she said.

"And I appreciate that, Alice, but my husband and I are back together, and he's taking care of me right now. It's not that I don't need you, but Edward is taking care of me, as it should be. You're welcome to drop by. Jasper's on his way over, and we're gonna study for the ACT with him. You're welcomed to join us if you wanna."

"Bella, I feel as if you are dumping me now that Edward is back," Alice said, hurt in her voice.

"Please don't feel that way, Alice. You're still my best girl-friend, and I love you. I've made a big mistake by confiding in you the way I did, and I can't make that mistake again, not if I want my marriage to work, and I do want my marriage to work. We can talk about anything else, Alice. Anything except my marriage. That topic is off-limits from now on. Edward and I have to work out our own problems. I'm not saying we're perfect, but I am saying we're together again, and that's what I've been praying for."

"Okay, if that's the way you want it. I don't think I'll be coming to the hospital for a while, at least while Edward is there," Alice said.

"I'm sorry to hear that, Alice. I want you two to get along again. You're cousins, and family should get along."

"Well, he hurt my best friend, and I'm not so forgiving. I'm not blinded by love the way you are, Bella. I still see things the way they are. He still doesn't see the baby as a baby, and you still don't have to forgive him for that," Alice said.

In my heart, I wanted to tell Alice that he did, that he'd had a revelation this morning, but it wasn't her business. It was between Edward and me. I didn't need to tell her he'd broken down and cried on my shoulder for the baby we'd lost, or the reason why. Just then, Dr. Bush came into the room. "Look, Alice, the doctor just came in. I'd love to see you later, but I've gotta go now. Bye."

"Bye," Alice said, and I hung up the phone.

"I didn't mean to get you off of the phone, Bella," Dr. Bush said.

"It's okay. The conversation was over anyway," I said.

"How are you doing this morning?" she asked.

"I'm okay for right now, but I usually am during school hours. I'm a little nauseated, but I don't try to eat or drink, so I don't vomit," I said.

"She didn't keep down any of her breakfast, but after they gave her some more Zofran, she was able to keep down some sips of Sprite," Edward said. "Not a lot, but she hasn't vomited it back up in the past hour."

"Well, that's good," Dr. Bush said. "Is that all she's had since you came in last night?"

"Yes, Ma'am," Edward said.

"Well, it's no wonder she was so dehydrated. She doesn't drink any more than that during the regular day at school?" Dr. Bush asked.

"Well, I usually try to drink some lemonade at morning break," I said.

"It's Crystal Lite lemonade, not real lemonade," Edward said. "She doesn't drink anything with any calories in it."

"I don't like that, Bella. I want you to start drinking some Sprite or Coke during your break. I'll write a note to the school if I need to. You need calories. The baby needs some calories," Dr. Bush said. Then she examined Bella. "Your stomach is very active this morning. I'm still very worried about you, Bella. I don't know when you're going to be discharged. You may be in here up to a week or more. Some women spend three or more weeks in the hospital with hyperemesis gravidarum if they don't respond to the meds."

"Hyper what?" Edward asked.

"Hyperemesis gravidarum. Hyper means too much. Emesis means vomiting. And gravidarum means pregnancy. So you see, all it means is too much vomiting with pregnancy. Big words for a common problem."

"Oh. Okay. That makes sense. The problem is school. What will we do about school?" I asked.

"You can get your assignments and do them here. I'll give you an excuse to miss school," Dr. Bush said.

"What about Edward?" I asked.

"I'll need to go to school, Bella. We have to have someone to take notes in Biology and Chemistry and Government," he said, "but I'll skip football and come right back here."

"No, Edward, you need to go to football, or you won't be allowed to play on Friday night," I said.

"It won't matter. My backup can take over if he benches me. I don't care," he said. "No football game matters more than you do, Bella."

"We'll see. Maybe I won't be in here that long," I said.

"Okay, I'm gonna order that you can have sodas between your meals. I want you to sip on them during the day, okay?" Dr. Bush said.

"Okay," I said.

"Oh, by the way, why did you put all of our history with Victoria in Bella's chart?" Edward asked.

"What do you mean?" Dr. Bush asked.

"All of that G and P stuff. Why did you have to put it in there?" Edward said.

"Well, Edward, it's part of Bella's history. It matters to any other doctor who may be looking at her chart. How do you even know about it?" Dr. Bush asked.

"Well, it seems to matter to the nurses, too," Edward said.

"What do you mean?" Dr. Bush asked.

"Bella's nurse this morning had to ask us about why the numbers didn't match up and about the baby we aborted. It was quite upsetting for the both of us," Edward said.

"Oh, Edward, Bella, I'm so sorry. That should have never made it back to the two of you. I'll take care of the situation immediately. Please forgive me for any uncomfortable feelings you had. Unfortunately, the number for miscarriages is also for abortions, and she made a mistake, an assumption based, I'm sure, on your ages. I'll take care of this."

"Thank you, Dr. Bush," Edward said.

Dr. Bush left the room, and I took the Sprite which was left over from breakfast and sipped a little from it. It had gone flat, and it was warm, but I thought I could keep it down. Edward took it from my hands and sat it on the edge of the rolling table where my breakfast tray had sat. A nurse came in and changed out the IV bag which was running dry. Then Edward pulled out our calculus books and notebooks. We started our homework, and before we were finished, Jasper knocked on the door.

"Come in," I said. He walked in with his bookbag thrown over one shoulder.

"How are you feeling?" he asked.

"So-so. I've been better," I said.

"I can leave. I know you don't need company when you don't feel good," Jasper said.

"Don't you dare, Jasper. We've been expecting you. Pull up a chair and get out your new study guide. Edward is ready to help you. He's blown past me in this calculus homework anyway. I need some time to catch up," I said.

"Are you sure, Bella? I don't mean to intrude," Jasper said.

"That's why it isn't an intrusion," I said. "Now do as I said. I think that after I'm done with this calculus, I might take a nap."

Edward put up his calculus homework and pulled his chair up next to the couch where Jasper took a seat. Jasper pulled out his study guide, and the two of them started going over the sample problems. They worked until they brought me my lunch tray which was again liquids. I again tried the popsicle, and this time, it stayed down without the help of more Zofran. I even drank some of the Coke that was on the tray. I didn't try the broth, however. I had to force Jasper and Edward to go down to the cafeteria to get themselves something to eat, though. Edward didn't want to leave me alone, but I insisted he needed to get something to eat. Eventually, Jasper convinced him to go with him, and they left. I lay down in the bed, and I dozed off for a little while. I wasn't even aware when they came back into the room.

When I woke up, they were back and working on the book again. Jasper was having problems with a physics problem, and Edward was frustrated because he couldn't get Jasper to understand what was going on. I interrupted them and told Edward to go get me a Coke from the nurses' station, and he left the room. Then I took a shot at explaining the problem to Jasper. He was also frustrated by that time, but I showed him a different way to work the problem, and he eventually calmed down enough to get it.

"I don't know what I'd do without the two of you," Jasper said. "Here you are laid up in a hospital bed, and you two are helping me study for this test. You two are the best friends ever."

"We think the same thing about you, Jasper. You were the best friend Edward needed while we were fighting, and you don't know what that means to me. I'd go to the ends of the earth for you, I want you to know that," I said.

"Thanks, Bella. That means a lot coming from you," Jasper said. Just then, Edward came back into the room with my Coke.

"Here you are, sweetheart. Don't drink it too fast. You don't wanna make yourself sick," he said.

"Yes, sir," I said, saluting him. I opened the Coke and took a sip. It tasted good going down. I took another sip, and it felt good on my stomach. I reached over to get my calculus book to do some more work on it, and all of a sudden the Coke decided that it didn't feel so good. "Edward!" I said, and he jumped up and grabbed at the basin. He didn't make it in time, and I vomited in my hand and on the bed. He shoved the basin under my mouth as I continued to vomit up the sips of Coke I drank.

"I told you not too fast," he said, holding my hair away from my face. I shook my head. I hadn't taken more than a sip, but once it started, it continued. "Jasper, can you go get me a wet washrag from the bathroom, please." Jasper got up and ran to the bathroom, and he soon returned with a wet washrag which he handed to Edward. Jasper was white and didn't look too good.

"I'm gonna step outside for a minute," he said.

"Yeah, okay," Edward said, and he washed my face off with the washrag. "Would you walk down to the nurses' station and let them know that she's vomiting again?"

"Sure thing," Jasper said, and he practically ran for the door.

I leaned over the basin, and tears started running down my face.

"What's the matter, Bella? Are you hurting?" Edward asked me.

"No, I just hate to throw up. I'm so tired of this. I didn't do this with Victoria. Why is this time so different? I only took a sip, honestly." It was all I had time to say before I had to let go again. Edward just held me close to him.

"I don't know, sweetheart, but I do know it'll be worth it when it's over. Our baby will be healthy, and we'll be so happy," Edward said, rubbing the back of my neck. A nurse came into the room, and Edward looked at her. "Sorry, I didn't make it with the basin the first time. Her bed is ruined."

"That's okay. We'll take care of it. Let's get some medicine in her. What set her off?" the nurse asked.

"She tried to sip on a little Coke," Edward said.

"She didn't guzzle it, did she?" the nurse asked.

"No, not at all. All she did was sip it twice," Edward said, as I vomited again. At that point, the door opened and Alice came into the room.

"Oh, Bella, I'm so sorry. Can I do anything?" she asked.

"No, we've got it under control," Edward said as he wiped my face. The nurse had gone to get another towel to wipe my hand on after she'd given me my medication dose. I cleaned my hand and lay back onto the bed, my stomach settled for the moment. The nurse took the basin and rinsed it out, and Edward washed off my face with the washrag. He leaned over and kissed me on the forehead.

"Are you feeling better, sweetheart?" he asked.

"Yeah, some. I could use a shower, though," I said.

"Aren't you too weak to stand in the shower?" he asked.

"I could sit, and let you wash me off," I said, winking at him.

"You must be feeling better, you're being a bad girl," he said.

"No, I'm not," I said. "I'm just stating a fact. I've thrown up all over myself, and I'd really like a shower. Why is it bad for my husband to help me?"

"It isn't," he said, "if that's all you want, but historically, you generally want more in the shower."

"I'm sick, Edward. Give me some credit," I said. "I just want you to help me take a shower. If you don't wanna help, I'm sure Alice will help me."

"Of course I would," Alice said.

"I never said that I wouldn't help you, Bella, I just said, Oh, never mind," Edward said, blushing. "Forget I brought it up. Ma'am," he said to the nurse when she walked back into the room, "my wife would like to get a shower. I'll help her. Would that be all right?"

"Sure, if she feels like it. That way I can change her bed. Let's get this IV unhooked for the time being, just long enough for her to bathe, and we'll get her to the bathroom," she said. She left the room and returned with a syringe of a liquid, and she disconnected the IV, and then she injected the liquid into the IV. She put a clear patch on the IV site, and then she helped me walk Bella to the bathroom. After making sure we were all right, she left us alone.

Edward helped me to get undressed, and then he lifted me onto the shelf that was across the tub. He got the water running and wet and shampooed my hair. I let my head fall into his hands, and he gave me a scalp massage. Then he got my body wash and washed my body, paying special attention to my shoulders and neck. When he was finished, he helped me get out of the tub, and he toweled me off. He got me one of my night shirts that he'd brought from home, and he helped me put that on. He helped me to balance, and he held my panties while I stepped into them, and then he pulled them up for me. Then he helped me stand at the sink while I brushed my teeth.

"I feel so much better now," I said as he carried me back into my room and laid me in the clean bed. "Thanks, Edward."

"You're welcome, sweetheart," he said.

I pulled the sheet up over me, and I lay down. I felt better, but I felt worn out. I didn't know how I was making it through school. I guess it was on will power alone. I turned over on my side, and I saw Alice and Edward whispering back and forth to each other. I couldn't hear what either of them was saying, but I could tell they were fighting. "Would you two just get over yourselves?" I asked.

At that point, Jasper came back into the room. "Is it all clear?" he asked.

"Yeah, if you don't count your girlfriend and my husband fighting," I said.

"What are they fighting over?" Jasper asked.

"Hell if I know. They were whispering," I said.

"Do you two care to let us in on what's going on?" Jasper asked. "Or is it personal?"

"Edward doesn't think I have any right to care about Bella," Alice said tears in her eyes.

"That's not what I said, Alice, and you know it. I said you needed to butt out of mine and Bella's relationship," Edward said.

"Well, who else is she gonna turn to when you fuck up again?" Alice asked, her voice raised too loud for the hospital.

"I don't plan to mess up again, Alice," Edward said, his voice matching hers. "We're back together, and it hurts you for some reason. I don't understand why you're so afraid for us to be together! You're not losing your best friend. She's just back with her husband."

"I never see her when she's with you!" Alice said.

"You see her as much as you did before we got married," Edward said, running his fingers through his hair. "We still get together every weekend. You still see her in school and at cheerleading."

"No, you two are studying more than ever. We don't have the weekends, and now she's pregnant again, I'm gonna lose her for good," Alice cried.

"What would make you say that, Alice?" I said.

"You two withdrew from us the last time you were pregnant, and we rarely saw you," Alice said.

"If you will remember, Alice, that was because I was on house arrest. I didn't have a choice. We couldn't go anywhere except home," Edward said.

"Bella could have gone," Alice said.

"And would you have gone without Jasper?" I asked.

"No, I wouldn't have," she said.

"Then why would you expect me to go without Edward?" I asked.

"I don't, but you two are doing it again. You haven't been to a party since you found out you're pregnant," Alice said.

"Alice, we've been fighting, and I've been sick. Would you have expected me to go with us fighting?" I asked.

"I guess not," Alice said.

"Alice, you're not making much sense. You need to get over this jealousy of Edward. Nothing is gonna change between us. You're still my best girlfriend, and you'll always be unless you make it so uncomfortable I can't be around you. You have to know I'm always gonna pick Edward over you, as much as it hurts you to hear it, just like you'll always pick Jasper over me. That's the way it should be," I said.

Alice turned away from me, and I reached for Edward. He came over to me and took my hand. I reached up and kissed him. Jasper went over to Alice and took her into his arms. I could hear them whispering, and after a few minutes, Alice turned around, and with tears in her eyes, she came up to me and Edward.

"I'm sorry, Edward, Bella. I'm not gonna get into your business anymore, but I want you to know I care about you both, and I'm very glad the two of you are back together. I'm gonna go home now, and let the three of you get back to your studying. If you need anything, please call me. I'm here to help," Alice said.

"I accept your apology, and you don't have to leave. Stay and keep Bella company while I work with Jasper, why don't you," Edward said.

"Jasper won't work with me here. He'd rather I go," Alice said. She came over to the bed and gave me a hug. "I love you, Bella. Feel better."

"I will. I love you, too, Alice," I said. She went back to Jasper and gave him a kiss, and then she left.

"I'm so sorry about that, guys. I don't know what got into her," Jasper said.

"I think that we got a lot into the open. We made some progress today. I think I understand why she's been so possessive of me lately," I said.

"I hope so," Edward said. "We don't need to be fighting, not now that Bella and I are together again. Anyway, let's get back to studying. Bella, do you want me to get you your calculus, or do you wanna rest?"

"I wanna do my calculus, I think," I said. He got me my books, and I started working the problems that we were assigned, and after thirty more minutes, I'd finished the assignment. "Edward, I wanna try some more Coke. Do you think that would be okay?"

"Sure, do you want me to go get you a fresh one?" he asked.

"No, I'll call the nurses' station," I said, and I did. They answered and said she'd bring me one in a little bit. I put up my books in the mean time. When she came in the room, she asked me if I was nauseated, and I told her that I wasn't. I told her I wasn't the last time I tried the Coke. She stayed with me while I took a sip with the basin handy. I took just one sip and put it to the side. I lay back in the bed, hoping beyond hope I would keep it down. I was so tired of getting sick. After fifteen minutes and not getting sick, I tried another sip of the Coke, and sure enough, as soon as I swallowed it, it came right back up. I was so disappointed.

Edward and Jasper jumped up. Edward came to me, and Jasper left the room. I realized he had a weak stomach. Edward sat on the edge of the bed and pulled back my hair, rubbing my neck. I only threw up that one time, however, so I was getting better. Edward brought me a glass of water and my toothbrush, and I brushed my teeth. Then the nurse took the basin and rinsed it out again. Jasper finally came back into the room, apologizing for having to leave.

"It's okay, man. Don't worry about it. We understand," Edward said.

"Yeah, I have a weak stomach, too," I said.

"Are you ready to take your practice test?" Edward asked.

"Yeah, I'm good," Jasper said.

"Okay, I'm gonna time you. Get comfortable. Turn to part one. Ready? Here's some scratch paper. Begin." Edward timed Jasper through the entire test. Then he took the book and scored it. Jasper did well, scoring a twenty-four, definitely enough to get him into the University of Washington, even on a football scholarship.

"Congratulations, Jasper. I knew you could do it. Do you wanna work again tomorrow?" I asked.

"No, I promised Alice if she would give me today, I would spend tomorrow with her," he said.

"Okay, just remember the test is two weekends from today. That gives us just next weekend to study," Edward said.

"Yeah, I know. I've had enough for today," Jasper said. "Thanks for working with me today, and Bella, I hope that you feel better soon."

"Thanks, Jasper. I hope I do, too," I said. He packed up his bag, and after giving me a hug, he shook hands with Edward and left. We were alone for the first time since early that morning. It was nearly time for supper. I told Edward he needed to go get something to eat, but he refused. He wanted me to get my supper first. I told him I wasn't going to eat much, and he finally agreed to go to the cafeteria before it closed.

The nurse brought my medication before Edward left, saying she wanted it to take effect before I tried to eat supper which arrived before Edward got back. It was liquids again. I had a red popsicle, which I hated, so I didn't even touch it. There was another Sprite on the tray, so I opened it and sipped at it. I managed to keep down a couple of sips by the time Edward came back. He sat down by me on the side of the bed.

"How are you feeling, sweetheart?" he asked.

"So far, so good," I said.

"How much have you drunk?" he asked.

"Just a couple of sips," I said, "but I've kept them down. I think the medication is helping."

I was able to drink half of the Sprite, and I kept down the whole amount. Edward sat with me the whole time. He asked me about the popsicle, wondering if I wanted him to go get me another flavor. I told him no, I would be okay with the Sprite. He seemed to be okay with that answer. He leaned over and kissed me on the forehead. He wrapped me in his arms, and I melted into him. It felt so good to be back in his arms, right where I belonged.


	14. Chapter 14

Disclaimer – Stephenie Meyers owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.

A special thanks goes out to my beta, shelikesthesound.

A/N - I'm so, so sorry for not updating yesterday. I passed out at work, and my staff sent me home. I was sedated for the rest of the day, and unfortunately, my update suffered because of it. Please forgive me.

Chapter 14

The Fight

EPOV

Bella finally kept down something for supper, but they gave her the medication before she tried to drink anything. I was getting more and more worried about her. After she kept down a little Sprite, we worked some more on our homework. I had to catch up on my calculus, and she got started on our English homework. I caught up quickly because she wasn't feeling well and had a hard time concentrating. We did the rest of it together, and I didn't work ahead anymore. When we were finished with the written homework, I called the nurse and asked if she could have another dose of the medication. The nurse came in and gave it to her, and after thirty minutes, I asked the nurse if she could have another Coke. She sipped on it, and she was able to keep it down. I was happy she was able to keep the entire drink down. After that, we started studying our notes. I read my notes to her and asked her questions. She was able to answer anything I came up with, so we went to bed about ten p.m. She needed her rest.

I lay down on the reclining chair and tried to get comfortable. I knew I wouldn't sleep well. The chair just wasn't that comfortable. It was about two feet too small for me. I just wanted Bella to sleep well. Unfortunately, the night nurse came in every four hours and woke her up to get her vital signs. When she woke her up at five a.m., Bella looked at me, and I jumped up and grabbed the basin. I got it under her mouth just in time. The sickness was always the worst in the early mornings, and today was no exception. She started vomiting, and it wasn't long until she was down to the bile she always vomited up in the mornings. I was sitting on the bed next to her, and I held her while she was sick. I had become immune to the sounds and smells. The nurse went to get a wet washcloth which she gave to me, and then she left to get Bella's medication. When she got back, Bella was still getting sick, and she gave her the medication.

"Does she do this every morning?" the nurse asked. It was a different nurse than we had the previous morning.

"Yes, Ma'am. She has about two hours worth. Then, sometimes, the phenergan would settle down her stomach enough to allow us to get to school. Every once in a while, it would take longer than that," I said.

"Poor girl, I'm so sorry this is happening to you. It should calm down soon. I've given you the Zofran," the nurse said. "How far along are you?"

"We're just nine weeks," I said as Bella vomited again. "I don't know how she is gonna be able to make it to twelve like this."

"Hopefully, it will be over before she makes twelve," the nurse said.

"It wasn't this bad the last time. She had some morning sickness, but it wasn't nearly this bad," I said. "I wonder why this time is different."

"You've had another baby?" the nurse asked.

"No, we had a stillborn," I said. "She had an abruption at twenty-six weeks, and the baby was stillborn."

"Oh, I'm so sorry. I didn't know," the nurse said.

"That's okay. This baby is gonna be all right. We're gonna be a family," I said.

"How old are you two, if you don't mind my asking?" the nurse asked.

"We're both seventeen," I answered, and Bella lay back onto the bed. I wiped her face with the washcloth. "We were fifteen with the first baby, I'm sure you wanted to know."

"I was curious. You both look so young," the nurse said. "Your last name is Cullen?"

"Yes, Carlisle Cullen is my father," I said.

"If I may ask, how did he feel about the situation?" the nurse asked.

"About the fact that his fifteen year old son got _his_ fifteen year old girlfriend pregnant? He was great. He was the perfect father. He was there for us all the way," I said. "Believe me, he is the perfect husband and the perfect father. Mom and I couldn't ask for a better person in our lives."

"He's dreamy," the nurse said.

"Yeah, he's taken," I said.

"Oh, I know. But we can all dream, can't we?" the nurse said.

"No, not about my dad. That's just gross. That's like thinking about my parents having sex. Ewww," I said.

"That's not ewww, that's romantic. Carlisle and Esme are great together," Bella said.

"They're my parents. That is ewww," I said.

"Whatever," Bella said. "But you're not allowed to fantasize about Carlisle."

Bella lay over on my chest while the nurse took care of the basin. She soon fell asleep against me, and I ran my fingers through her hair. I kissed her on the forehead. She was my life, and I didn't know what to do to make it better for her.

When the nurse came in at shift change, I wouldn't let her wake Bella up. It was the same nurse from the day before, and she understood. When she came in to give Bella her medication, she did it without waking Bella up. Then, about an hour later, she brought in Bella's breakfast. I gently woke Bella up and asked her if she was hungry. She said that she thought that she could eat something. She tried the popsicle, and she was able to keep it down. She was also able to drink the Coke they had sent with the tray over the span of an hour. She kept it down. She said that she felt pretty good, and she was ready to do a practice test for the ACT. I set it up, and we took the test together. Then we graded each other's. I did better on mine, and Bella was disappointed, but I reminded her that she was sick, and she was doing good to take it at all. From there, we picked up our homework, and we began working ahead for the next week. Most of our teachers knew that we did that, and they were pretty good about giving us the work load ahead of time so we didn't have to guess anymore.

After church, Mom and Dad dropped by. They wanted to visit and told us that Bella was on the prayer list at church. We thanked them and visited for a little while. The nurse came in and gave Bella her medication, and after thirty minutes, she delivered her lunch tray. Bella was able to drink the Sprite, and she was able to eat the popsicle. I was very happy to see her keeping her second meal down in a row. She wanted me to go get something to eat, but I didn't want to leave her. Mom said she would stay with her, and Dad would go with me. I didn't want to leave because Dr. Bush hadn't been there yet, but Mom and Bella ganged up and insisted.

Dad and I walked down to the cafeteria, and I quickly grabbed a chicken sandwich. I sat down and ate it. Dad wanted to know how Bella was really doing, and I told him I was really worried about her. It had only been the second meal she'd kept down in forever. He reassured me that the Zofran would work; it was just a matter of getting it to her at the right time. He told me it started as a drug for chemotherapy patients because their nausea was so bad. As soon as I finished eating, I rushed back up to Bella's room. I found her and Mom talking. She looked good. I came into the room and got into the bed beside her. I cuddled up next to her, and she melted into me.

"Did you tell your dad about that nurse this morning?" Bella asked me.

"No, I didn't even think about it," I said.

"What about the nurse?" Carlisle asked.

"Yes, what about the nurse?" Esme asked.

Bella told them about the nurse's conversation with us. Carlisle laughed, but Esme didn't. "I don't like it that the nurses are still, after all these years, fantasizing over you," she said.

"I can't help it, Esme. They are fantasizing about me, not the other way around," Dad said.

"I know, but I don't have to like it," she said.

"I know how you feel, Esme. Those freshmen won't leave Edward alone," Bella said.

"What do you mean, dear?" Mom asked.

"Well, there's these two freshmen who just keep flirting with Edward and Jasper. They keep coming after the two of them. They talk to them and Jill even jumped on Edward once after a ballgame," Bella said.

"Well have you explained your situation to them?" Mom asked.

"The entire situation. We've told them not only are we married, but that we're pregnant," I said. "They just won't leave me alone."

"That's awful," Mom said.

"Yeah, I know," I said.

We talked over many things including the infatuations the girls seemed to have over me and my dad. When the afternoon came, they decided to go, leaving us alone again. Bella called for a Coke, and the nurse brought her some medication and the Coke. She encouraged Bella to wait for the medication to have time to take effect before trying the Coke, and Bella did. When she finally drank the Coke, she was able to keep it down. Later that afternoon, after some more studying, I helped Bella get another shower, and then I took one. As night fell, Bella decided she wanted to go to bed early, so I stretched out on my recliner. Dr. Bush never came by that day, and I was upset that we didn't see her.

I got some uncomfortable sleep, and when the nurse came in the next morning to give Bella her medication, I got up and got dressed for school. I hated to leave Bella, but one of us needed to attend. I told the nurse to pay special attention to Bella because I would be leaving her for the day, and she promised to pass it on to the day nurse. I sat back down to get my books together, and Dr. Bush walked into the room.

"Hello, Edward. How is she doing?" Dr. Bush asked me.

"She had a pretty good day yesterday. She didn't throw up at all, but we made sure to give her the medication at least thirty minutes before she tried to drink anything. Why didn't you come by yesterday?" I asked.

"I spent yesterday with my family. The nurses kept me up to date with her progress," Dr. Bush said.

"Okay. They just gave her the first dose of medication, and if we wake her up before it gets into her system, she'll get sick," I said.

"Well, I hope not because I need to examine her," Dr. Bush said. She looked at Bella and walked over to her. She leaned over her and shook her awake. "Bella, honey, wake up. It's Dr. Bush." Bella stirred. She opened her eyes, and she looked around the room, her eyes meeting mine. She smiled at me and started to sit up in the bed. I had already started to move towards the basin, and she looked at me with panic in her eyes. I made it to the basin and got it in place just as she got sick.

"I'm so sorry, Bella," I said. "I was trying to let you sleep through it." She nodded, and I went to the bathroom to wet a washcloth for her. I came back and washed her face. She continued to vomit for about ten minutes, and then the medication began to take effect. She rested back against the bed, and Dr. Bush examined her.

"You really have it bad, don't you?" she asked.

"It's worst when I get up in the morning," Bella said. "It generally gets better during the day, until night time rolls around again."

"Well, Edward told me not to wake you up, and I'm sorry I didn't listen to him," Dr. Bush said. "I'm going to keep you on a liquid diet for today, but tomorrow I may increase you to a regular diet if you can keep today's diet down."

"Okay," Bella said. "I do pretty good as long as I have my medication."

"Well, good luck," Dr. Bush said.

After she left, I got Bella some water to brush her teeth, and then I washed out the basin. I brought it back to her and put it within her reach. I then went through her books and got her homework for the day and put it in my bookbag.

When it was time for me to go, I went to her side and asked, "Are you sure you don't want me to stay with you today? I'd do it."

"I'll be all right. I'll get some sleep, and I'll read my biology and chemistry and government. Are you gonna go to football practice?" Bella asked.

"No, I'm coming back here right after school," I said.

"Coach is gonna be pissed," Bella said.

"Well, then he's just gonna have to be pissed," I said. "You're more important to me than a football game." I gave her a kiss on the forehead, and I hugged her. Then I picked up my bookbag, and, after waving good-bye, I left my girl.

I made it to school with minutes to spare. I put my books in my locker and went to my first period class. I turned in both of our homework, and when Mrs. Sims asked how Bella was, I told her that she was doing a little better. Mrs. Sims said when Mom had told her that Bella was in the hospital at church yesterday morning, she didn't think that I'd be there that morning. I told her that one of us needed to be at school because of the classes where we needed to take notes. She brought the class to order, and I sat down and continued my homework.

I took notes in the next class, and I went to stand with Jasper and Alice at break. I told them Bella had a good day the previous day, and I was upset about leaving her earlier. I was going to check out after Chemistry and go back to her early, skipping football entirely, not just afterschool practice.

Lunch was boring. I called Bella's room, but she didn't answer. That worried me even more. Was she asleep, or was she sick? I was desperate to know which. I almost left school at that point. Only Jasper was able to keep me from jumping ship. He told me the nurses were paid to take care of her, and I needed to take notes to take back to Bella.

I made it through the end of the day, and once Chemistry was over, I went to the office to check out. Mrs. Hope was there, and she asked, "Where are you going, Edward? Don't you have football practice?"

"I'm going to the hospital. Bella is admitted, and I'm going to be with her. I'm missing football," I said.

"Does Coach Davis know?" she asked.

"No, he doesn't. I thought I'd go tell him on my way out," I said.

"Okay. Give Bella my best," Mrs. Hope said.

"Yes, Ma'am," I said.

I left the office and walked to my locker to get my books. I took them to my car, and then I walked to the field house. I opened the door, and I walked in. The rest of the team was still at afternoon break. "Coach Davis, are you here?" I called out.

"Yeah, come on back," he said.

"Coach, I'm not gonna be at practice today," I said.

"Is there a reason you're missing practice?" he asked.

"Bella's in the hospital. I'm going to be with her," I said.

"Okay. Do you have any idea when she's gonna get out?" he asked.

"It could be all week. We don't know. She's vomiting too much. She was passed out on the floor of the bathroom when I got home from the game Friday night. She's been in the hospital since then," I said.

"How's she doin'?" he asked.

"She's still vomiting everything she takes in unless they give her medication beforehand. I don't know when they're gonna let her out. She's vomiting every morning when she wakes up whether she's had anything to drink or not," I said.

"That's serious. Tell her I said to get better soon," he said.

"Yes, sir," I said. I left his office and got in the car. I waved at Jasper and Alice as I left the parking lot. I headed to the hospital directly from school, and I brought my books up to the room with me. Bella was sleeping when I entered. I silently sat down in the chair across from the bed, and I started reading the assignments for the next day. I knew I would reread them with Bella, but I needed something to do.

A little while before suppertime, the nurse came into the room and gave Bella her medication. I asked her how Bella had done during the day. She said that she mostly slept, and she'd been sick once. I nodded my head. Though we were whispering, Bella woke up. She looked around, and, when she saw me, she smiled. I got up and kissed her.

"How are you feeling, sweetheart?" I asked.

"All right," she said. "I had a pretty good day."

"I called you during lunch, but you didn't answer. Were you okay?"

"No, I was sick. I'm sorry. I wish I could've talked to you," she said.

"It's okay. Are you better now?" I asked.

"Yeah. Really I am. I feel pretty good. I'm ready to try something more than a popsicle," she said.

"Well, Dr. Bush did say that maybe tomorrow she'd upgrade your diet," I said.

"I hope so. I'm so bored with this diet. I'm ready to go home, Edward," she said, tears in her eyes.

"Bella, what's wrong? Are you hurting?" I asked.

"No, I'm just frustrated at being here so long. I wanna go home," she said.

"Bella, just hang in there. You're gonna feel better soon. Then you'll get out of here. Just think about the baby. You're stressing the baby when you get sick, and it's important that you get well before you go home," I said.

"I know it," she said, "but that doesn't make me wanna stay here any longer. I really would rather be in my own bed…in my own bedroom."

"We'll get you home soon. I promise. Soon," I said. "Do you feel up to doing some homework?" She nodded, and I pulled out our calculus. We started on it, and I finished it first. She had a couple of problems with it, and I showed her how to do it. She picked it up quickly, and we moved on to Spanish which we did together. We finished the rest of our homework, and then we worked on the next night's homework.

Bella was in the hospital for the rest of the week, finally getting discharged on Friday morning. I skipped school that morning in order to get her home and settled. She was on oral medication every four hours. She was keeping down food as long as we gave her medication as prescribed.

I figured that I was going to be benched for the game later that night. It was a home game, and I hadn't attended practice all week. I didn't think there was any way I'd be able to play, but I was going to go to the game anyway. Bella thought that she was going to be able to go to the game, but she was going to sit in the stands. We drove to the game at the usual time. We were playing another of our rivals, the Wildcats. I walked Bella to the stands where she sat down. I made sure she had her medication and a Coke. Then I walked to the field house.

When I walked in, some of the guys hit me on the back, welcoming me back and asking me how Bella was, and some of them just stared at me like I was destroying their peace on earth or something. I walked back to Coach Davis's office.

"Can I come in?" I asked, knocking on the door.

"Come in, Cullen," Coach Davis said.

I went in and took a seat. "Bella got discharged today. She's sitting in the stands," I said.

"Do you expect to play?" Coach Davis asked.

"No, Sir. I haven't worked out all week, and I wasn't even at school today. I just wanted to know if I could dress out," I said.

"If you don't play, you'd still wanna dress out?" Coach Davis asked.

"Yes, Sir. I still wanna be part of the team, even if it is from the sidelines," I said.

"Then go dress out," he said.

"Thank you, Sir," I said. I stood up and shook his hand. Then I went out to the locker room and started changing into my uniform. The others invariably stared at me. When it was time for us to go out to warm up for the game, I went with the team. We warmed up as usual, and then we went back to the field house, and Coach Davis stood in front of us.

"All right men. Tonight we're playing one of our major rivals. We've taken them to the cleaners for the past two years running, so you know this year they're gonna be out to get us. I'm here to say that I wanna take them back to the cleaners. I plan on doing that the best and easiest way possible. Now you all know that Edward hasn't been with us for this past week. Most of you know why, but if you don't, then don't worry about it. The point is I know why, and I approved his absences. Edward didn't come here expecting to play tonight, but he's gonna start as quarterback. If any of you yahoo's have anything to say about that, then speak up now."

He was quiet for a moment, and several of the younger players looked back and forth to each other. Jasper looked at them, and finally he said, "Coach, I think that it's great that Edward is playing. I know why he wasn't here, too, and I think you're right for allowing him to be on the field."

"Here! Here!" Anthony yelled.

"Woah, what about the rules? What about the participation rules? Are you saying that he's above the rules?" St. Cloud asked.

"No, St. Cloud. He's not above the rules. He's put in plenty of extra practices to make up for the ones he missed, but the most important fact is he missed practice because his wife was in the hospital having problems," he shut up rather quickly. "I'm sorry Edward. I almost told your business."

"It's okay, Coach. The team can know. Bella is pregnant, and she's been in the hospital since last Friday night. I found her unconscious after the game. She just got discharged today," I said.

The team broke out into a lot of mumbles.

"So, you can clearly see, Edward has been with his wife while she was admitted into the hospital. I think that was definitely a good enough reason to miss practice. Don't you? Anyone else wanna question me?"

"No, Coach!" the team yelled as one.

"Then let's get out there and beat those Wildcats. The normal captains. Spartans on three! One! Two! Three!"

We all yelled, "Spartans!" and we went outside to the breakthrough banner. I gathered with the rest of the team, and Jasper and I were two of the first to break through the banner. We ran through to the sidelines, and Jasper went to Alice to give her a kiss before the game. I looked into the stands to find Bella. She was sitting next to Mom and Dad, and she looked all right. I waved to her, and she waved back. Soon it was time for us to go to midfield for the coin toss.

Jasper and I walked in the center of the group of us, and the other team called the toss. They lost, so I told the referee that we'd defer till the second half. The Wildcats chose their side of the field, and our team's kickoff team took the field. We went back to the sidelines. I picked up a football and started throwing to Jasper. I hadn't thrown the ball in a whole week. It felt good to have the ball in my hands again. It didn't take me any time to get warmed up which was good because our defense held them to three and out.

They punted the ball, and it was time for me to take the field. I wasn't nervous. There was always the first pass of the game, and I always had to make it. I just wished I'd been able to run some routes before we'd been put into the game. It didn't matter at all, though. As soon as I called the play, and as soon as the ball was in my hands, I threw it straight to Jasper. He was brought down after only gaining fourteen yards. We picked up the first down, and then I handed off the ball to our running back. We picked up another first down.

For the next play, I passed to Jasper again. That time, it was a thirty yard pass which he ran another twenty yards. We were first and goal. When we got set up, I called the play, and I passed another one to Jasper, who was in the end zone. Touchdown. The point after was good. 7-0. The rest of the game was pretty much the same. They were out to get me. My offensive line was right on, never letting them through. I didn't get sacked the whole game. I threw everything on target, and Jasper caught everything that I threw him. If my other receivers were only as good as he was. My running backs were pretty good, though not as good as my former running back who had graduated last year, Reg. Well, they had to grow. We ended up winning the game 63-0. It was a big win for us.

I quickly took my shower, and I rushed outside to meet Bella. She was standing with Alice at the usual tree. I took her into my arms and kissed her.

"I didn't think you'd get to play," she said.

"I didn't either," I said. "I just came to dress out. Coach was on our side. Now, let's get you home." We said goodbye to Jasper and Alice and said that we'd see them the next morning, and we walked to the car. All of a sudden, someone came up behind me and pushed me in the back. I stumbled forward, almost taking Bella down with me. I turned quickly to see St. Cloud standing there.

"What the hell? What do you think you're doing, St. Cloud?" I asked, steadying Bella on her feet. I was holding her up, and he hit me on the shoulder that was farthest from her.

"I'm so sick of you, Cullen. You can't do anything wrong. You're so perfect. I should've gotten a chance to play tonight, but no, Coach let you play, and I was benched. It's not fair!" he said, punching me on the shoulder again. I towered a full foot taller than him, and I outweighed him by a good thirty pounds.

"Look, you'd better stop doing that. Bella is still sick, and I'm about to beat the shit out of you. If you come near her one more time, you'll be on your ass before you can say my name again," I said.

He clenched his fist and drew it back again, and that time, I let go of Bella and blocked the punch with my left hand while punching him in the stomach with my right hand. He doubled over with a whooshing sound, and I took Bella back in my arms. I turned and began walking her toward the car again.

"Who was that?" she asked.

"A sophomore who is jealous of me. He can't stand that Coach let me play tonight. He is the only one who raised an objection about it when Coach brought it up in the locker room," I said. Just then, someone jumped on my back, their arms interlocked around my throat. I let go of Bella, and bending over, I pulled the guy off of me and threw him to the ground on his back. Wrestling around with Jasper and Emmett had taught me to hold my own in a fight. It was St. Cloud again. He jumped up and quickly got into a fighter's stance. He started throwing punches which I brushed off. I didn't throw any back. I knew Coach's rule about fighting on the team, and I wasn't interested in getting Coach angry at me. Soon, several of our teammates gathered around us. They were egging St. Cloud on, knowing that I could beat his ass. A couple of them asked me why I was playing with the baby. I mostly just blocked the punches. Every once in a while, one or two of them would get through, though, and I would feel them. He wasn't holding anything back.

Not long after the fight had started, what I knew would happen, did. Coach Davis came in to break it up. "Cullen. St. Cloud. In my office, now. Any witnesses to this who wanna come forward, come now or forever hold your peace." Several of the football players walked off, but several of them followed us into his office, one of them escorting Bella.

Coach Davis walked into his office and sat behind his desk. "Come in and take a seat." St. Cloud took a seat, and I held the other chair in the room for Bella to sit down. I stood behind her. "Who started this?" I was quiet, waiting for St. Cloud to confess to his part in the fight. He was quiet, too. "I said, 'Who started this?'" Coach repeated.

When St. Cloud was again silent, I said, "He did, Coach. I was walking Bella to our car when he hit me in the back."

"Is that true, St. Cloud?" Coach asked.

"He hit me back," St. Cloud said.

"Edward?" Coach asked.

"Yes, Sir. When he almost hit Bella by punching me in the shoulder and drew back to do it again, I did hit him in the stomach. I'm sorry, and I'll take whatever punishment you decide is appropriate," I said.

"Coach, that wasn't what I saw," Anthony said.

"Me either, Coach," Thomas said.

"Nuh huh, Coach," the others in the room were shaking their heads.

"Well, what did you guys see?" Coach Davis asked.

"Edward was walking Bella towards their car when St. Cloud came up behind him and jumped him from behind, choking him. Edward flipped him off of him, and then he made sure Bella was okay. St. Cloud here jumped up and started swinging at Edward who just blocked his blows the best he could. St. Cloud must have thrown thirty to forty blows, and Edward never hit him, Coach," Thomas said.

"Is that what happened, Edward?" Coach asked.

"Pretty much, Coach," I answered.

"Well, why didn't you tell me that?" Coach asked.

"It wasn't my place to tell you. By our honor code, it was St. Cloud's place to admit it to you," I said. "I told you what I did, and he should have told you what he did."

"All right, the rest of you are excused. Bella, you may stay," Coach said. He waited until only the four of us were alone. "Bella, how are you feeling?"

"Weak, but starting to feel better. I'm a lot better than I was last week at this time. Thanks for letting Edward off to take care of me. You don't know how much I appreciate it. He's been my rock," Bella said.

"You're welcome. Now for you two. You both know the rule about fighting on the team. Edward, as a senior and team captain, I hold you to a higher standard than the rest of the team. You owe me ten extra laps every day for the next month. Do you understand? Maybe you will think about what you did while you're running them each and every day."

"Yes, Sir," I said.

"St. Cloud. You're off the team. I won't tolerate that kind of behavior from anyone at all on my team, especially after I've made my decisions known to you. If you'd had a beef with Edward playing, even after I explained why I decided that he could play, then that was between you and me, not you and Edward. Who plays and who doesn't play during games is my decision and my decision alone. You will not attack my players for my decisions. Turn in your uniform and your pads. I don't wanna see you in this field house or on my field again. Do you understand?" Coach said.

"That's not fair. There you go again with your double standards. He gets to run laps, and you kick me off the team. Where's the justice in that?" St. Cloud asked.

"Your offense was much worse. You attack him twice. He walked away from you once, only to be attacked again. You almost hit his wife. You threw thirty to forty punches, while he threw none. You didn't own up to your actions. You violated the honor code for this team in ways that I can't even begin to count. You're lucky I don't turn you over to Mr. Green for fighting. I won't do it because this is a team matter, but, bottom line, my decision is final."

"I'm telling my dad," St. Cloud said.

"Good. Please remember to tell him the reasons I'm kicking you off the team. If he has any questions, he can call me anytime," Coach said. "I'll be happy to discuss my disciplinary actions with him. Now you are dismissed. Bella, Edward, will you two stay, please?"

St. Cloud left the office, slamming the door behind him.

"Edward, Bella, how are the two of you doing?" Coach asked.

"We're doing great, Coach," I said, looking at Bella. I smiled at her and took her hand in mine.

"Back together, then?" he asked.

"Yes, Sir. We're together again. I almost lost her. It didn't take long after Friday night to make me come to my senses and see the errors of my ways," I said.

"We're doing great again. It's almost like we weren't ever fighting," Bella said. "We're back on the right track."

"That's great news. I'm so happy for you two," Coach Davis said. "Okay, you two, get home, and Edward, good game."


	15. Chapter 15

Disclaimer – Stephenie Meyers owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.

A special thanks goes out to my beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 15

Betrayal

BPOV

When Monday morning came, we gathered up my books, along with Edward's, and drove to school. I'd tried to get up and move around during the weekend so I wouldn't be so weak, but I had to admit, I didn't have much strength. I made it through my classes, though slowly, and I was thankful to realize that by Edward coming to school the prior week, I had managed to keep up pretty well.

One week rolled into the next. It was mid-October, and Edward had dug out our Doppler machine. We had finally been able to pick up the baby's heartbeat, and we were listening to it every night before we went to bed. We were at twelve and a half weeks, and we were so happy. We were entering our second trimester, and the nausea and vomiting were finally slowing down.

It was also time for the last game of the season. We had managed to hold onto our spotless record. We were about to go our third straight season undefeated. Edward had almost finished his punishment for fighting with St. Cloud. He ran his ten laps every day, including Saturdays and Sundays, just like Coach told him to. I was proud of him for following his instructions. As the day approached for the game, the teachers got less and less accomplished. They finally just decided to leave the heavy stuff for the next week and gave us worksheets to do during class and no homework. That was just fine with us. I wondered what it would be like when we were up for the championship game again. Would we be able to just skip school altogether?

The night of the game arrived, and Edward and Jasper were in rare form. They didn't miss one pass all night. Edward had to throw to other receivers of course, but they connected as well. I think only one of his passes was dropped the entire game, and that was the receiver's fault. Edward had thrown it right into his hands. He had just turned to run with the ball before he had caught it well enough. Edward didn't throw one interception during the whole season. His pass percentage overall was eighty percent, and to Jasper, it was over ninety-seven percent. He threw over sixty touchdowns for the year, most of them to Jasper. All said, the two of them had a great year.

Sometime during the year, they both started getting recruiting calls from college scouts. Most of the calls were from the area teams, but Edward had gotten some from as far away as Georgia. How the people in Georgia found out about him, I'd never figure out.

We got our ACT grades back, too. I know I wasn't feeling well, but that didn't ease the disappointment when Edward made a thirty-six, and I made a thirty-five. He was going to win the award for the highest ACT in the class. All of the teachers were going crazy over his score. Just because it was the highest score possible to make on the test, I didn't see what all the fuss was about. He was just the same Edward that he was before. Jasper did well on the test, too. He made a twenty-five. It was high enough that he'd get into any school he applied to.

The next week was the first playoff game. Edward and Jasper were unstoppable. They were fifteen for fifteen, all but three of those for touchdowns. We, needless to say, wiped the field with that team. That day was also Halloween. Something was in the air, and since we had home field advantage during the entire playoffs, all of the rest of the games would be played at home.

Edward and I decided to dress up and go to the aftergame party. It was at Anthony's house, and it was a blast. His parents put on the best Halloween party I'd ever been to. There was scary music, and the house was decorated to the hilt. Things jumped out at you no matter which way you turned. I held onto Edward the whole night. He held me close, and he laughed when I jumped at the Halloween decorations. After we'd been dancing for a while, I needed a break, so Edward and I moved to the side, and he leaned over and kissed me, non-chastely. We were getting into the kiss, and his hands were starting to roam, when Alice came up to us.

"You two wanna take that home? You're making some of the guys a little uncomfortable," she said.

We broke off what we were doing to find half of the room staring at us. I blushed and buried my face in Edward's chest. He just grinned at the people and pulled me closer. Then he walked me into the kitchen, away from the people in the room. He picked up where he was, kissing me open-mouthed, using tongue. His hands roamed down to grab my butt, and I pressed myself into him, feeling him pressing into me, as well.

"Bella, I want you, now," he said.

"I want you, too," I said. "Take me home." He nodded, and taking me by the hand, he led me out of the house and to the car. He opened the door, and helped me inside. We rode home, holding hands and rubbing our fingers together. When we got home, he came to open my door, and he picked me up and carried me inside. He carried me to our bedroom, and we picked up where we left off. It was a great night, and we made love for the first time since our fight.

Afterwards, we lay in bed together, talking to each other. We heard Jasper and Alice come in and go to their room. They were in early because we planned on going to the UW game the next day. It was a home game, and Emmett had scored us some tickets. We were so excited to be able to see them again.

We got up early the next morning, and we got on the road. It didn't take us more than two hours to get there, and we stood in line to get into the stadium. Edward and I held hands, and we were happy to be out in the fall weather. It wasn't too hot, and it wasn't too cold. The temperature was perfect for a football game. By the time that we got seated, the team was on the field warming up. We easily spotted Emmett, and we were so excited. It was a wonderful day for football.

The game was spectacular. Emmett played a wonderful game, rarely missing a block. He was on target, and we enjoyed ourselves immensely. Rosalie looked amazing. She was great in her role as cheerleader. We had a super time at the game, and when it was over, we waited outside the stands. We met up with Rosalie first, and she walked us to where she usually met Emmett.

It took almost an hour for the football players to come out of the field house. Emmett looked great. I swear he had grown another half a foot and had gained another fifty pounds. When he came up to us, he shook Jasper's hand and hugged Alice and me. He looked at Edward, and he frowned.

"What's this I hear about you and Bella fighting?" Emmett asked.

"We're not fighting anymore. Everything is okay now," Edward said, holding out his hand to shake Emmett's.

He didn't shake Edward's hand. "What's this I hear about you moving out of the house? I promised that I'd beat your ass, and I haven't forgotten that promise," he said.

"Emmett, we're back together. Don't involve yourself in what's past. It's over," Edward said, pulling his hand back in.

"Emmett, we're okay. There's nothing that needs to be taken care of. How did you even find out we were fighting, anyway? I didn't tell Rosalie," I asked.

"I might have," Alice said.

"Did you know about that?" I asked Edward.

"Yeah, I knew she told both Rosalie and Emmett. It's part of why we were fighting while you were in the hospital," Edward said.

"You didn't tell me?" I asked.

"You didn't need the added pressure. You were sick," Edward said, pulling me into his arms.

"Wait, when were you in the hospital, Bella?" Rosalie asked.

"Several weeks ago. I was vomiting too much. They had to get it under control," I said.

"Why didn't you call?" Rosalie asked.

"She needed her rest. I was there to take care of her," Edward said.

"I should still kick your ass," Emmett said.

"Go for it," Edward said.

"I should," Emmett said.

"No, you shouldn't," I said. "Emmett, we're back together and doing great. Let's don't get off on the wrong foot this weekend. We don't have that long together."

"Oh, okay. But if you ever hurt her again that way, I'm gonna beat the shit out of you," Emmett said.

We spent the rest of the day together, and that night, Emmett and Rosalie took us to a party. There was alcohol, and both Jasper and Edward started drinking along with Emmett and Rosalie. It didn't take long before the guys were sloshed. We danced together every dance, and I stuck to drinking Sprite or Coke, and only if Edward had gotten it for me. Once, one of the frat boys came up to me with a drink in his hand for me, and I politely tried to turn him down. He wouldn't take no for an answer, and Edward had to step in.

"I'm sorry, but she can't have that. Thanks anyway," he slurred.

"Who are you to say what she can and can't have to drink?" the frat boy asked.

"Her husband," Edward said, standing up to his full height.

"Oh, really? I don't believe you. You might be her boyfriend, but you're too young to be married," he said.

"Well, sorry to burst your bubble, but we've been married for almost two years," I said. "We got married young."

"Sure. Dance with me, darlin'," the frat boy said.

"I don't think so," I said. "I think I'll stick with my husband."

"Oh, come on, sweetheart. I won't hurt you. Just one dance," he said.

"Is there a problem over here?" Emmett asked, coming up behind me.

"No problem, Emmett. This guy doesn't wanna believe Edward and I are married," I said, taking Edward's hand in mine.

"Bryant, is that true? Are you bothering my friends?" Emmett asked.

"They're with you, Cullen? I didn't know. I'm sorry," he said, turning away. Then he turned back. "By the way, are they really married?"

"Yep, since they were sophomores in high school. He knocked her up," Emmett said.

"Oh, okay. Sorry, pretty girl," the frat guy said.

"Emmett, you didn't have to volunteer that information," I said.

"Well, it's the truth. I didn't think you were embarrassed about the baby. After all, you're preggo again," Emmett said.

"You're impossible," I said. "Now, leave me alone with my husband." Edward and I went back to our dancing, possibly some dirty dancing. I could feel the need in his body, and I rubbed up against him. We were staying near campus at a hotel for the night, and I asked him if he was ready to go. He said that he wasn't. He wanted to stay and party some more.

I had to go to the bathroom, so I told Edward that I would be back in a little bit. I left him in search for the bathroom. I found Alice and talked her into going to the bathroom with me. We finally found it and stood in the line for almost thirty minutes. Once we were finally finished, we went back to where we left the boys, but they weren't there. I couldn't find Edward anywhere. I looked all over the dance floor for him but couldn't find him. I went into the kitchen to look for him, and he wasn't there. I stepped outside to see if he'd gone outside for a breath of fresh air, and I couldn't find him there. I stepped back inside, and the frat boy from earlier came up to me.

"If you're looking for your husband, I saw him go upstairs with another girl. I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news," he said.

I brushed past him and went upstairs. I looked all around, and I couldn't see him. I saw several closed doors, though. I went to the first closed door and opened it. There was a couple in the bed. I apologized and shut the door. I went to the second door and opened it. There was another couple making out. It wasn't Edward. I breathed a sigh of relief. I again apologized and went to the third door. I opened it, and there was Edward. There was a girl kneeling in front of him, with his pants at the floor. She was about to put her mouth on him.

"Edward Cullen! What the hell do you think you're doing?" I asked, my voice barely carrying across the room.

"Who the hell are you, honey?" the girl asked.

"His wife, honey," I said, walking across the room. I walked up to Edward and slapped him across the face.

"Bella, what are you doing? Why'd you do that?" he asked.

"You tell me, you fucking asshole. What the hell are you doing?" I asked.

He looked around, saw the girl, and realized that his pants were down. "Oh God! What's going on here?" he asked.

"That's what I wanna know, Edward," I said. "What is going on here?"

"I don't know her, Bella. I don't know how I ended up in this situation. I swear it," he said.

"I think we'd better go, Edward," I said.

"Yeah, I think you're right," he said.

"I know I'm right," I said, the tears running down my cheeks.

I left the room, and Edward stumbled after me, fixing his pants. I went back downstairs and found Alice. I told her we were going on to the hotel, and she asked me why I was crying. I shook my head and left her. I looked around and found Rosalie. I told her we were going to the hotel, and she also asked me why I was crying. I told her I was okay, I was just tired, and she said she'd tell Emmett that I said goodbye.

I turned, and Edward was behind me. We walked outside, and the cool air felt good to me. I walked towards the car, knowing Edward would be following me. When we finally got there, I took the keys and unlocked the doors. He opened the door for me, and then he got into the car. I drove us to the hotel, and we went to our room.

"Bella, please speak to me," he said.

"I don't think I can," I said.

"Please, Bella. Forgive me," he said.

"What the hell happened back there, Edward?" I yelled, the tears starting up again. "How could you?"

"Bella, I swear! I don't know what happened! One second I was waiting for you, and the next, you're slapping me in the face. I don't know how I got there!" he said.

"I'm supposed to believe that I go to the restroom, and you end up in some bedroom with your pants around your ankles with some girl about to blow you, and you don't remember getting there?" I yelled.

"It's the truth, Bella! I swear it!" he said sitting on the bed with his head in his hands.

"I just don't believe you," I yelled. "I think you saw someone you liked and went for it. You just didn't think you'd be caught!"

The tears were running down my face and dropping onto my shirt. My nose was running, and I couldn't catch my breath. He was running his hands through his hair.

"Bella, I can go to bed with you anytime I want to. Why would I want someone else?" he asked.

"You can't touch me," I yelled, backing away from him, moving against the wall. He didn't move an inch.

"Bella, I don't remember. I'm so sorry. Maybe somebody slipped something in my drink," he said.

"Sure. Sure, Edward. You're a six foot two inch little girl just waiting to be taken advantage of. I'm sure that's what happened! You were ready for her to, to," I buried my face in my hands.

"Bella, I'm so sorry," he said again, that time he did get up and tried to come over and hold me. I wrenched myself out of his arms.

"I said, 'don't touch me,'" I pulled back from his embrace. He just stood there with his hands down at his side.

"I love you, Bella," he said.

"I hate you, Edward," I said. "Just don't come near me, not ever again." I ran for the bathroom and slammed the door. I fell to the floor and sobbed. Edward was going to cheat on me. I couldn't believe it. I couldn't fathom that he could find someone else to replace me with, especially now we were finally together again, after we'd made love last night.

He knocked on the door. "Bella, please come out of there. I'll go. I'll sleep in the car, okay. You just come out and get into bed. Please. I'll leave if you don't wanna be in the same room as me," he said.

I stood up and opened the door. "You can't have the keys. You've been drinking which is why I think you got with that girl," I said.

"No, Bella, I swear! I don't remember a thing after she brought me that drink. I think that she drugged me. I'm serious. Bella, please believe me! Please!" he said.

"I'll go down and unlock the car, but you can't have the keys," I said. "Hand them over."

"Bella, please, listen to me. Believe me!" he said.

"I'll go back into the bathroom, Edward," I said.

"Okay. I'm going. I love you, Bella. I swear it!" he said, opening the door and heading out to the car. I used the remote to open the door, and then I shut the door to the hotel room. I went to the bed and lay down on it. I curled up into a little ball and started crying again. My life was over. Edward had betrayed me in the worst sort of way. I didn't know what I was going to do. I wanted to die. I didn't know how I was going to get through the night, much less the next day when I was going to have to face our friends. Everything had been going so well! And now everything was worse than ever!


	16. Chapter 16

Disclaimer – Stephenie Meyers owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.

A special thanks goes out to my beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 16

Drugged

EPOV

I left the hotel room against my better judgment. I didn't want to leave Bella alone as upset as she was. I didn't blame her for feeling the way she did. She'd caught me in a compromising position ― one I had no idea how I'd gotten in. Hell, _I_ was upset. The last thing I remembered before Bella slapped me was that girl bringing me a drink. I was stupid to take it from her. We'd been talking, and I'd told her my wife had gone to the bathroom. She seemed so nice. When she brought me the drink, I didn't even question it. I took it, and though it tasted a bit salty, it was all right. Just a rum and coke.

I tried to stretch out in the car. There was no way to get comfortable. I was too big for the back seat, not to mention, I was nauseated as hell. It had turned out to be the worst day of my life. I didn't know how I was going to convince Bella I was telling the truth. Did it even matter? I'd done what she'd seen. Did it matter why? She'd busted me with my pants down for another woman. Nothing had happened, but that was because she'd broken up the situation, not because of me. Shit! What had happened? What was I doing? I must have been drugged. I must have been! There's no other explanation!

Could I even prove that to Bella? Could I go to Dad and get him to run some kind of test when we got back to prove I was drugged? Possibly. Would it matter to Bella? I doubt it would. She'd seen it, and I couldn't take it back. Was our marriage over? Had I ruined what we had? It was entirely possible.

I tried to go to sleep, but it was impossible. I heard when Alice and Jasper came back to the hotel, and I dropped down, not wanting them to know I had been forced to sleep in the car. I couldn't stand to face them. They would want to know what had happened, and I couldn't admit I'd really fucked up so badly this time. They would find out soon enough.

When morning came, I waited in the car for Bella to come to me. I hadn't slept, and I didn't move from the car the whole night. About seven o'clock, she came down to the car, her eyes red and swollen, and her hair disheveled. She knocked on the window, and I opened the door.

"Hi," I said. I didn't know what else to say to her.

"Come back upstairs," she said.

"Are you sure?" I asked.

"No. But you need a shower, and we need to talk," she said.

"Okay," I said, and I followed her upstairs to our room. I sat down on the bed and noticed that neither one had been slept in. "Did you sleep last night?"

"No. I thought all night. I don't know what has gotten into you, Edward. I can't believe you'd betray me like that. It's so not like you to do something like what I walked in on, but I can't ignore what my own eyes saw," she said.

"Would you believe me if I said that she drugged me?" I asked. "I'd be willing to undergo a drug test if you'd believe me, or if it'd make a difference."

"I don't know, Edward. That seems to be a convenient excuse. Why would she do that? Why would she pick you out of everyone there? There isn't any good reason that I can see," she said.

"I know. It so doesn't make sense. I don't know what happened, Bella. One second I'm talking to her, and the next, you're slapping me. I swear it," I said.

"Why would you be talking to her in the first place, Edward?" she asked.

"I didn't wanna be rude. I was telling her about you, how you'd gone to the restroom, and she gave me a drink. I took it. I didn't think anything of it. I was drinking, and it didn't occur to me that it was drugged. I know we don't take drinks from people for you because they're probably spiked, but since I was drinking, I didn't think it was something I had to worry about," I said.

"Edward, I don't know what to say. I really don't wanna be in the same room as you right now. Go get your shower," she said.

"Okay," I said, and I gathered my clothes and went into the bathroom. I took my shower and got dressed. I came back out into the room, and Bella was sitting on the bed, crying. "Bella, please, honey, please. Don't cry. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean for this to happen. Please."

"Don't call me honey. You betrayed me, Edward. You hurt me worse than you can imagine," she said.

"I don't wanna imagine how hurt you are. I don't know how you are in the same room as me, if I think about it, and I'm so glad you are allowing me to be in the same room as you," I said. "What are you gonna do? Are you gonna leave me? Kick me out? I'd deserve it." I sat down on the opposite bed.

"I don't know what I'm gonna do, yet, Edward. My mind is going a hundred miles a minute. One minute I hate you, and the next, I believe you, that there is no way that you would do such a thing, and I should give you a chance to prove to me that you were drugged. But then would that change anything that you did?" she asked.

"Of course it would. It would prove I wasn't in my right mind. It would prove I didn't know what I was doing. It would prove I wasn't doing it on purpose, Bella. Believe me, please. I wasn't even aware of what was going on," I said.

"Yeah, Edward. You've said that before. I heard you the first, and the second, and the third times," Bella said.

"I'm sorry, Bella. I just want you to believe me. I'm so sorry this has happened," I said, putting my head down into my hands. "What happens now? What are you gonna tell Alice?"

"Don't go there! I'm in my rights to tell her anything I damn well wanna tell her. You're the one who fucked up, Edward, and if I wanna tell her, I damn sure will," Bella yelled.

"No, that's not what I meant. I assumed you were gonna wanna ride back with them, so I just wondered what you were gonna tell them, if I needed to be ready for Alice's anger, too," I said.

"No, I don't think you're ready to drive. I'm driving home," she said.

"Then I'm riding back with them?" I asked.

"No, you can ride back with me," she said.

"Okay," I said. "Thank you."

Bella got up and walked over to me. She took me into her arms and held me close to her. I wrapped my arms around her waist. "I love you, Bella," I whispered.

"I love you, too," Bella said. I looked up at her, and tears were running down her face. She laid her face on top of my head, and she started crying harder, almost sobbing. I just held her and let her cry herself out. There wasn't anything else I could do about the situation. I had to let her cry. I couldn't take away the hurt I'd caused her.

Soon, before she was done crying, there was a knock at the door. She stood up and wiped at her eyes. I looked at her, and then I got up and went to answer the door. It was Alice, of course.

"Alice. To what do we owe this surprise?" I asked.

"Bella isn't answering her cell. Is everything okay?" Alice asked looking around me, searching for Bella.

"No, everything's not okay. Why don't you go sit with her? She probably needs a friend right now," I said. I walked outside as Alice walked past me into the room. I sat down outside of the room, just waiting for hurricane Alice to come back outside and attack me. After a little while, Alice did come outside.

"She wants you to go back inside. She won't tell me what's wrong, just that you hurt her last night," Alice said. "Do you care to let me in on the big secret?"

"No. If Bella didn't tell you, then I'm not," I said. "Let me get in to her." I stood up and walked past her and back in to Bella who was still crying. I walked up to her and pulled her into my arms. She fell into my grasp, and started sobbing.

"Bella, I'm so sorry! Damn it, I wish I could take back what happened last night. I wouldn't have had anything to drink. I swear, if you can find it in your heart to forgive me, I'll never drink again. I swear it to you. Never!" I said.

"That's a start. I wouldn't want you drinking when the baby gets here, anyway," she said.

"Does that mean you can see me in your life when the baby gets here?" I asked.

"It means I can see you in the baby's life, whether you're in mine or not," Bella said.

"Okay. Thanks for that," I said. "I don't know what I'd do if I lost you and the baby. I don't know what I'm gonna do if I lose you." The tears started building in my eyes, and I tried to blink them back. Bella didn't need any added pressure on her. Soon, my nose started running, and I excused myself to the bathroom to blow my nose.

"Are you ready to leave for home?" Bella called out.

"Anytime you are," I said. I came back into the room and gathered the suitcase. I carried it downstairs and to the car. Loading it into the trunk, I noticed Jasper walking outside to meet me.

"Are you guys gonna go to the continental breakfast?" he asked.

"No, I think we're heading back," I said.

"Alice said something is wrong between you and Bella again. Is everything okay?" he asked.

"No, it's bad. Really bad. I don't know if we're gonna be okay again," I said.

"What's happened? You two were great last night," he said.

"I don't wanna talk about it. Suffice it to say, I fucked up, and good," I said.

"I don't believe it," he said. "You wouldn't do anything to hurt her. You love her too much."

"Yeah, I do, but I fucked up, Jasper. It happened, and Bella found out," I said.

"I can't imagine you'd do something stupid," he said.

"Look, can we drop it? Okay? I really don't wanna talk about it."

"Yeah, okay man," he said.

At that point, Bella came downstairs, tears in her eyes, and she looked at Jasper.

"Good morning, Bella," Jasper said.

"Morning, Jasper," she said.

"Are you okay this morning?" he asked.

"Not really. I guess Edward told you we're having problems," she said. I nodded. She came over to me and said, "Are you ready to head home? I think you need to talk to your dad, don't you?"

"Really?" I asked. "Do you think that'll help?"

"I don't know, Edward. Maybe. I just don't know," she said. "Let's get on the road. Bye, Jasper. You two have a safe trip."

"Bye. You two talk this out. Whatever it is, talk it out. It's not worth splitting up over. You two can forgive anything. Look at Alice and me. She's forgiven me for more than I deserve to be forgiven for. If she can forgive me my past, I'm sure you can forgive Edward whatever he's done, Bella," Jasper said.

"Jasper, you weren't married when you cheated on Alice, were you?" Bella said.

"Well, no, but we both know Edward wouldn't cheat on you, Bella," Jasper said.

I hung my head and went to get in the car.

"Wait, you mean Edward cheated on you! No, Bella, I don't believe that for a fraction of a second. He would never," Jasper said.

"Jasper, just stay out of this. Please, don't say a word to Alice. I don't need her judgment. Edward and I are having a hard enough time dealing with this, okay?" Bella said. I just put my head in my hands.

"Of course. My lips are sealed, but you can't believe he would cheat, Bella. Someone is leading you astray. Someone is telling you a lie, Bella. Just trying to get Edward into trouble," Jasper said.

"Jasper, I caught him with another woman myself, okay? Now please…back off," Bella said, the tears starting again. She cranked the car, and Jasper backed away. The look on his face was one of shock. Bella backed out of the parking spot. She wiped at her eyes, and then she pulled forward out of the parking lot. We quickly got on the interstate and headed for home.

After thirty or so minutes, I looked at Bella and said, "Did you mean it about getting the drug testing done?"

"Yes, I'd like to know if you were drugged. It makes all of the difference in the world. If you were drugged, then maybe I can forgive you, but if you weren't, then there is no chance in hell that I can forgive you. Your betrayal is beyond hurtful. It is the worst thing you could have done to me, and I don't think I can trust you anymore," she said.

"Fair enough. I just hope the drugs are still in my system. I don't know what I'll do if they don't show up in my bloodwork," I said.

"Then you won't have a leg to stand on," Bella said.

"I understand," I said. I didn't know how I was going to explain this to Dad, though. He was going to be so disappointed in me, again. What if he refused to do the bloodwork? Then I was screwed.

Bella pulled into the driveway an hour and a half later. I got our suitcase from the trunk and took it inside to the bedroom. Then I took my cell phone into the den. I dialed my dad's number and waited for him to answer.

"Hello, Edward. How are you and Bella? Is everything all right?"

"No, Dad, everything isn't all right. I need your help."

"What's wrong?"

"I'm going to disappoint you again, Dad."

"Oh,"

"I was drinking last night at a frat party,"

"I see,"

"I think someone slipped something into one of my drinks,"

"Oh,"

"I got caught doing something I would never do, and I need for you to do a drug test to prove I was drugged, please,"

"Are you in trouble with the law?"

"No, Sir. With Bella."

"What were you doing?"

"I'd rather not say,"

"I want to know. I want to know if this was enough of a problem to teach you a lesson."

"Believe me, it was. I've promised Bella that if she can forgive me, I'll never drink again, ever."

"It seems it was something significant enough to change your mind about drinking."

"It was, trust me,"

"I'll do the drug test, but I want to know what you did, Edward. I want to know how you hurt Bella."

"I got caught in a very compromising position with another girl," I said.

"Who caught you?" he said.

"Bella did."

"What is a compromising position?"

"Dad, do you have to know the details?"

"I wanna know why you think you were drugged."

"Because she gave me a drink, and we were talking, and the next thing that I knew, Bella had slapped me and was asking me what the hell I thought I was doing."

"What were you doing?"

"Damn it, Dad. I had my pants around my ankles, and she was about to blow me, okay."

"And that's when Bella walked in on you?"

"Yes, Dad."

"Okay, meet me at the ER."

"Yes, Sir."

I hung up and called Bella. I told her Dad was going to meet me at the ER. I asked her if she thought I was okay to drive, or if she wanted to drive me. She stated that she wanted to go with me, so we got back in the car, and she drove me to the ER. I met Dad there, and he checked me in. He told me to get a urine sample. I got the sample for him, and he sat down in the room with me and Bella.

"How are you doing, Bella?" Dad asked her.

"I'm here. I don't know how I'm doing. Sometimes I want to take him in my arms and say this is a nightmare, and sometimes I want to kick him out of the house," she said.

"I don't blame her," I said.

"I've never been so disappointed in you, Edward. I don't know what it's going to take to convince you drinking is wrong, especially at your age. I've been through this several times with you, and you just don't seem to get it. If you'd only gotten it sooner, then this wouldn't have happened to you, Son," he said.

"I know it, Dad. I know. I hate it, and I can't take any of it back," I said.

"What's worse is the way you've hurt Bella. She's carrying your baby, and you do this to her, Edward. All because you wanted to get drunk? Underaged drinking. I've warned you! What's next? Illegal drugs? Pot? Coke?"

"Of course not. I'd never do anything illegal like that. It's against the law…and bad for you," I said.

"It's illegal to drink until you're twenty-one years old. It isn't healthy for you to drink alcohol, either," he said.

We waited for about an hour. The test finally came back, and it was positive for Rohypnol. Dad explained that these were known as Roofies, and they would cause me to not know what was going on. They would cause me to forget periods of time. He had confirmed I had been drugged. Now I just had to figure out what it meant for Bella and me.


	17. Chapter 17

Disclaimer – Stephenie Meyers owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.

A special thanks goes out to my beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 17

Nightmares

BPOV

So it was true. Edward had been drugged after all. He'd been telling the truth all along. It was possible, then, he wasn't aware of what was happening in that room, and he had no idea that girl was taking advantage of him. But, it was also possible he was aware of what was happening the whole time. How would I ever know the truth? Could I ever trust Edward again? How could I trust him after everything that had happened? How would I know when, or if, he was telling the truth?

"What now, Bella? Do you believe me?" Edward asked.

"I don't know, Edward. I just don't know. It's gonna take some time. Let's go home," I said. "Thanks, Carlisle, for everything."

"Bella, the test was very positive. It wasn't even questionable. He was drugged last night, and it was a pretty high dose, by the looks of the test. I know that doesn't excuse his behavior, but it may explain it."

"Yes, Sir," I said. "Thank you for your time. I'm gonna have to think about all of this. The hurt hasn't gone away just because the test was positive." I took the keys, and we waited for the nurse to come with the discharge paperwork. Edward signed the proper forms when she came in, and then I drove us home.

The ride home was silent. I didn't want to get into things, and Edward didn't say anything else until we got to the house. When we walked through the front door, however, he broke the silence.

"What do you want me to do?" he asked.

"Stay away from me," I said. "I don't want you anywhere near me right now."

"Do you want me to move out, or is another room far enough away?" he asked.

"For now, another room is adequate." I walked to our bedroom and sat down at the computer. I googled "roofies" and found several sites that listed the symptoms and the side effects of taking the drug. I researched it all afternoon, and I came to the conclusion that Edward's story could hold water. He could have been drugged in the thirty minutes I was gone, and he could have been put in that situation without his conscious knowledge of being there. The question was whether I believed my husband or not, and if I believed him, did it make any difference. Was I upset enough to hold it against him for taking a drink from a complete stranger, especially a girl? The answer to that question was a resounding yes! I was angry about that! He would never accept it if I took a drink from another guy. Why should I accept the reverse?

I got off of the internet, and I lay down on the bed. I didn't feel well, and I had missed one of my doses of medication while we were at the hospital. I needed to get it, but I didn't have the mental energy to get up and take it. I really didn't care about anything that was going on at the present. I just wanted to curl up in a little ball and die. The tears started flowing again as I closed my eyes, and the picture of Edward in front of that hussy with his pants at his ankles came into view. I couldn't sleep because every time I closed my eyes, that vision was what I saw. My husband. The love of my life. About to do something with another woman that was supposed to be only between us. Betrayal.

The sobs escaped my throat, and I couldn't stop them. I gasped for breath, and the longer I cried, the worse it got. Soon, I was screaming, "I hate you," at the top of my voice, over and over. It really didn't make me feel better, because I didn't hate him. I loved him. If I hated him, then his actions wouldn't have hurt me so badly. I loved him with all of my heart. Before long, I was all shouted out, and I started whispering, "I love you, Edward," over and over again to myself. It helped more than the ranting and raving had. I knew I loved him with all of my heart, but how was I going to get over all of this hurt? How was I going to get over all of this disappointment?

I eventually stopped crying, and about an hour later, after sundown, Edward appeared in the doorway. He had my medication and a Coke.

"I'm sorry to bother you, but it's time for your medication. I brought it so you wouldn't have to get up. I'm making you a sandwich. Do you have any preference in what kind you want? Ham, turkey, grilled cheese?"

"You don't have to make my supper. I'll get up and get it myself."

"It's no problem. I was gonna make me one, and it's no problem to throw you one together at the same time."

"I'll take a ham sandwich then. Thank you."

"No problem. I'll be right back with it." True to his word, he was back within five minutes with a sandwich which he put on the night table.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome. Do you need anything else?"

"To be alone."

"All right. Are we gonna do our homework together?"

"No. I don't think so, Edward. I can't look at you right now."

"Okay. Goodnight, Bella. I love you."

"Goodnight, Edward."

I ate the sandwich in silence. I loved him so much, and I realized he was drugged, so why couldn't I get over the fact he wasn't responsible for his actions? He wasn't even aware of what was going on. How could I hold it against him? Because it hurt so damned badly, that's why! If he was allowed to be mad at me for simply talking to Alice about our business, then didn't I have the right to be angry to him for stripping down in front of some strange girl? I thought I did, and I thought I was going above and beyond to allow him to continue to stay at the house. After all, I could have asked him to move out. Asking him to move to the guest room or the couch wasn't too bad, was it? I didn't think so.

I got up and thought about starting on my homework, but I couldn't concentrate. I did the best that I could and left it at that. I really didn't give a shit about any of it. What did it matter in the grand scheme of things? Nothing. Who cared about calculus, biology, or chemistry? Certainly not me. Edward had betrayed me in the worst way. I guess it could have been worse. She could have had him in the bed with her, making love to her. Yes, it certainly could have been worse, but it was definitely bad enough. I couldn't think about it anymore.

I went back to bed and tried to go to sleep, but it wouldn't come. Instead, visions of Edward doing all kinds of horrible things invaded my mind. Eventually, I must have dozed off, because the visions got worse. The scene progressed, and the two of them completed their activity. I cried out, "No!" and I sobbed as I ran from the room after Edward looked up at me with a grin on his face. He didn't even pretend he didn't know what was going on. The look he gave me said he knew exactly who I was and that he'd been caught. I couldn't stand it. I sat up in the bed, screaming, "No, Edward, No!"

It didn't take him long at all to reach my bedside. "I'm here, Bella. It was only a dream. I promise; it was only a dream. You're in our bedroom, and you're okay."

I pushed him away. "You did do it, Edward. Don't tell me it was only a dream," I said, the tears falling down my face.

"I'm so sorry, Bella. I'm so sorry. Please, please forgive me."

"It isn't that easy, Edward."

"I know. I can't imagine what I'd be thinking if the roles were reversed. I think you're doing amazingly well, considering the circumstances."

"Just go. Leave me alone. I'm okay."

"It doesn't sound like you're okay. Please, Bella, just let me hold you until you go to sleep."

"No, Edward. Leave me alone. I don't want you near me right now. I have to try to sleep so I can go to school tomorrow."

"Okay. I'm going. I love you." He left the room, and I lay back down. I shut my eyes and tried to go back to sleep. All I could think about was what I was going to do the next day at school. Maybe I wouldn't go. I didn't think I could face him all day, be near him all day without crying.

I fell back asleep, and when the alarm went off, I got out of bed and took my medication. It helped with the nausea I was still having, and then I went back to our bedroom. I still hadn't decided whether or not I would be going to school. My gut instinct told me not to go. It would be too hard to look at Edward all day long and pretend nothing was wrong, and I was tired of being "broken up." I was so tired of the school knowing our business. Besides, I never got around to actually doing all of my homework the night before. So, I guess my decision had been made. I wasn't going to go to school that day. Screw it. I needed to take a day for me.


	18. Chapter 18

Disclaimer – Stephenie Meyers owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.

A special thanks goes out to my beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 18

Semi-finals

EPOV

Bella didn't sleep well, at all, the previous night. I know, because I could hear her tossing and turning the entire time. I didn't sleep for the second night in a row. How could I sleep? I had totally screwed up my life…and all for a drink. How stupid could I get? At least I was able to prove I was drugged. Like Bella said, if there was no proof of my being drugged, I had nothing to stand on. As it was, I had very little. I really couldn't remember going upstairs with that girl, much less dropping my pants, but that had been the way Bella had found me. I couldn't deny the truth of the situation. I had disappointed Bella, my Dad, and me. And now Jasper knows. I was sure that he would keep my secret, at least, I hoped he would. I kept his, except from Bella, but Bella didn't tell Alice. She kept his secret, too. If he told Alice, the whole world would know. Alice wasn't able to keep her mouth shut for one second if the gossip was juicy.

I sat up when Bella came by to get her medication. She didn't even glance my way, much less speak to me. Well, I needed a shower, and my clothes were in our bedroom. I could get cleaned up in the guest bathroom, but I'd have to get my things out of our bathroom first. I listened for the shower to come on, but it never did. Eventually, I got up from the couch and walked to our bedroom. I knocked on the door.

"Come in, Edward," she said. I entered the room.

"I can take my shower in the guest bathroom. I just need my things out of ours," I said. She waved towards the bathroom, and I walked in and gathered my things. On the way out, I grabbed some clothes for school. I stopped in the doorway to look at her, but she didn't meet my gaze. I turned and walked down the hall to the guest bathroom. I got my shower and shaved. I dressed for school and came out into the hallway. Then I went up front to get my books together. Grabbing a breakfast bar and some water, I sat down on the couch to wait on Bella. When it approached time to go, I walked back to the bedroom and knocked on the door again.

"What do you want, Edward?"

"It's time to leave for school. Did you call Alice to pick you up, or are you riding in with me?"

"I'm not going today."

"Are you sick? Do I need to stay home with you?"

"No. The reason I'm not going is to be away from you. I can't pretend everything is okay today, and I'm tired of all of the drama when we fight at school, so I'm just not going."

"Bella, I'm so sorry."

"Yeah, you've said that more than once."

"I love you."

"I love you, too. Now go away." So I went away. I went to the car, and I drove to school alone. On the way, tears welled up in my eyes, and I blinked them back, which, of course, made my nose run. I wiped it when I made it into the parking lot. Jasper was waiting for me, and he walked up to the car as soon as I got out.

"Where's Bella?" Jasper said.

"She couldn't stand being around me today, so she's skipping," I said.

"It's that bad?"

"Yeah. At least that bad if not worse."

"Did she really catch you with someone else?"

"Can you say that any louder?"

"I'm sorry. That's just not like you. You love her, and I'm trying to wrap my mind around what she told me, and I can't."

"Yeah, Jasper. She told you the truth, but we found out yesterday afternoon I'd been drugged. Someone slipped some roofies into my drink. I wasn't aware of what was happening."

"Then she should forgive you."

"It's not that easy, Jasper. I hurt her immeasurably."

"But it wasn't you."

"Yes, it was me. I just wasn't aware of what I was doing. That doesn't change the fact it was me doing it. At least not to her it doesn't."

"What exactly were you doing? Kissing someone else?"

"I wish. No, Jasper, she caught me with my pants down for another girl."

"Oh, shit."

"Yeah. Please, Jasper, don't tell Alice. I don't need her wrath at the moment. Bella is hurting bad enough right now without an 'I told you so' from Alice."

"I would never tell her something you told me in confidence. You and Bella have helped me out too much this year for me to betray your trust like that."

"Thanks, man. We'd better get to class."

I managed to stay in school for the entire day, worried as I was about Bella. I played the worst afternoon of football I've ever played― from fatigue and just not caring one way or another. Coach didn't say anything to me, but I was sure he thought about it. When practice was over, I got in the car and went home.

"Bella, I'm home," I called out when I opened the door. I went straight back to our bedroom to find her at her desk working on homework. I told her what she'd missed in class and what our homework for the night was, and she told me thank you. Then she turned in her chair.

"Edward, you know I love you, right?"

"Yeah, I know."

"You know you hurt me, right?"

"Yeah, I know."

"I still don't know what to think. I know you were drugged, and that makes a huge difference. I believe you don't remember anything about being in that room, or how you got there. So the real problem boils down to what you were doing talking to that hussy to begin with. You didn't like me talking to that guy. In fact, you butted in and put a stop to it. So why your standards didn't apply to you bothers me, but it isn't the end of the world. What I'm trying to say is I think I can forgive you. I think."

"Thank you, Bella. I love you so much."

"I love you, too." I walked over to her and took her into my arms. I rested my head on hers. I held her close to me, and the tears started flowing from my eyes. "I thought I'd lost you forever," I said.

"So did I," she said, "but then I looked at it from your point of view. You don't even remember the reason you're in trouble."

"I don't remember until you slapped me, but then I remember everything so vividly. I realized what situation I was in, and the only thought I had was I was gonna lose you. I was so scared."

"I was furious."

"I don't blame you. I would have been, too. I am. I'm furious with myself for allowing the situation to happen. I swear to you I'll never drink again. As long as I live, I'll never touch alcohol again. This situation taught me that lesson. I don't ever wanna be unable to think clearly again. I know it was the roofies that caused it, but they never would have gotten into my system if I hadn't have been drinking."

"I'm glad to hear that, Edward. I've never liked you drinking."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"You're a grown man, old enough to make your own decisions and to live with the consequences of those decisions. Just like now. You're having to live with the consequences of your decisions."

"You're right. I thought I'd lost you forever. That's the worst feeling in the world."

"I love you. I guess I can forgive you. Just know… if I ever catch you in any compromising situation again, any at all, there will be no third chances. Ever, Edward. Ever."

"I understand. Completely. And there won't be any compromising positions ever again. I swear it. I'll never put myself in any situation where it can ever be misconstrued. I swear it!"

"You'd better not. We're having a baby, and that is the priority here. Now, can we both get started on our homework?"

"You bet." I picked up my bag from the front of the house and brought it back to the bedroom, and we worked on our homework for an hour or so. Then I got up and made us some supper. After we ate, we returned to our homework. I helped Bella to catch up from what she'd missed that day, and we worked on the next day's work for a little while. I was a little reluctant to quit, not knowing where she was going to want me to sleep for the night.

When she stopped studying for the night, I got ready to get a shower in the guest bathroom. Then I put on some pajama bottoms and came into the bedroom to tell Bella good night.

"Aren't you gonna sleep in here?"

"I didn't know if you wanted me to," I said, my fingers crossed.

"Yes, I want you to." She came up to me and gave me a chaste kiss. I kissed her back, and I got into the bed with her. I spooned her and put my hand on her lower abdomen. I always liked to sleep with my hand over our baby.

"Do you wanna hear its heartbeat tonight?" I asked, reaching for the Doppler.

"Sure," she said, rolling over to give her stomach to me. I used the Doppler to find its heartbeat, and we counted it to be at one hundred and fifty beats per minute. "Sounds good," she said.

"Yep," I agreed. "Little baby is active tonight. What are we, fourteen weeks now?"

"Yep," she said. I cleaned off her belly and put up the Doppler. I put my hand back over her belly, and she put her hand over mine. "I'm gonna have to buy some maternity clothes soon. It's starting to hurt to wear my regular pants over my stomach," she said.

"Why does your stomach hurt? Is something wrong?" I asked.

"I don't think so. I talked to your mom about it, and she said that her stomach hurt to be touched, too. I think it's normal, especially with your second pregnancy. I just know having my pants over my stomach is really getting uncomfortable."

"Can you wear any of your old pants, or do we need to go shopping tomorrow? Most of your tops were winter," I said.

"My clothes are in the attic, Edward. I can't get up there and get them. You're gonna have to get them, and it's dark when you get home. We're gonna have to wait until this weekend," she said.

"If you can hold a flashlight, I can go get them right now," I said.

"This weekend will be soon enough," she said.

"Are you sure? I can get them now. I don't want you to be uncomfortable."

"I'll be fine until this weekend," she said.

"Okay," I said.

We went to sleep, and the next morning, when we woke up, I rolled over to kiss her, and she returned it. I got up, took a shower, and got dressed. Then Bella got up to start her day. I prepared breakfast while she was getting ready, and she sat down and we ate. She did well with breakfast, and I carried both of our bookbags to the car. I waited for her to come out, and, not long after, she did.

"Are you ready?" I asked her.

"As ready as I'm gonna be," she said. I drove us to school. I got out and went around to open her door for her. I got both of our backpacks and took her hand. We walked together to our lockers, and we changed out our books. Alice and Jasper met us there. Jasper noticed we were holding hands, and he smiled at us. We walked to the office and got an excuse for Bella for missing the previous day, and we walked to our first period class. Bella took the excuse to Mrs. Sims who signed it. She turned in her assignments and took her seat. No one mentioned her absence, and I was glad. I guess they just assumed she was sick.

The rest of the day went well. We stood together at morning and afternoon break, and we sat together at lunch. She held my hand between classes, and she didn't seem to have any problems being around me during the day. Alice must have bought the "sick" story, because she offered to take Bella home after school was over, but Bella refused, wanting to stay and work with the cheerleaders. When they were finished, she came to the stands and watched our practice.

On the way home, though, things went downhill rather quickly. I reached to hold her hand, and she withdrew it from my reach.

"What's wrong, sweetheart?" I asked.

"I don't want you to touch me right now," she said.

"Oh. I'm sorry. I thought we were past that," I said.

"Well, we're not. I did good all day to be near you, to touch you as if nothing is wrong," she said. "Well, we're not in public now, and I don't have to act anymore."

"Of course not. You don't have to act at all, Bella. I deserve whatever you want," I said.

"Why are you being so good about this?" Bella asked.

"Because I'm guilty of what you're accusing me of. I know it, and you know it. Bella, I don't lie, especially to you. I never have, and I don't plan to start now," I said.

"But you were drugged. You have an excuse. You could be playing that card," she said.

"But does it matter to you? Obviously not," I said. "If it did, then you would've forgiven me."

"You're wrong. It matters a great deal. If you hadn't been drugged, it would have meant the end of us. As it is, you're still living at home, and you slept in our bed last night," she said.

"You're right. I'm sorry. I am grateful for everything that you've done for me," I said.

"It's just a bit much for me right now," she said.

"All right," I said as I pulled into the driveway. I carried both of our bookbags into the house and went into the bedroom to take a shower while Bella cooked us some supper. We ate together, and then we started on our homework. We worked the rest of what we didn't finish the night before, and we started working on the next night's work. We studied our notes, and when it came time to go to bed, I asked Bella where she wanted me to sleep.

"You can sleep in our bed, but I don't want you to touch me," she said.

"Okay," I said, crawling into the bed. I didn't even try to kiss her when we laid down.

The rest of the week went the same. We would appear to be fine at school, and once we would be on the way home, Bella would pull away from me. I was getting used to the yo-yo effect. I didn't know what else I could do except wait. She would have to come to me in her own time.

When Friday rolled around, we were in the second week of playoffs. The game went as expected. We played well, and we won a resounding blowout, 73-10. Jasper played very well. I could throw anything toward him, and he would catch it. He was amazing, and I knew he would be picked up for a scholarship. I just hoped we would be going to the same school. I think we both wanted to go to the University of Washington so we could play with Emmett. I knew they needed a new quarterback after the year was over as theirs was graduating. I was hoping I would get to play as a freshman.

The following week was the semi-final game of the State Championship series. I again started as quarterback, and Jasper started as wide receiver. The game became lopsided very early on. We were ahead by 56 at the half, and when we went to the field house at halftime, Coach told us his usual speech about not getting complacent. If they'd made it to the semi-final game of the State Championship Tournament, they surely could come back from a 56 point deficit. We told him that we understood, and we went back outside when halftime was over and took the field again. About halfway into the third quarter, something happened that hadn't occurred all year. My offensive line let me down. One of their defensive linemen jumped offside and managed to get around my offensive line to sack me. The next thing that I knew, Coach Davis and our trainer, Melanie, were leaning over me.

"Edward, are you okay, son?" Coach Davis asked.

"Yeah, Coach. I'm okay," I said. "What happened?"

"You got knocked for a loop," Coach Davis said. "Can you sit up?"

"Yeah, I think so," I said, and I sat up. I felt dizzy. "Woah, I'm dizzy," I said.

"Take it slow," Coach said.

"I'm better now," I said.

"Okay, let's see if you can stand," Coach Davis said. I stood up, and the dizziness returned. Melanie and Coach held me up, and they walked me off of the field. My backup ran onto the field, and they were able to hold us to three and out. I had moved us down field enough to get us a field goal, though.

Dad met us on the side line. "How are you, Edward?" he asked.

"A little dizzy," I said as I took a seat on the bench.

"Were you knocked out?" he asked.

"Yeah, I was," I said. "I don't remember anything after I got hit. I'm assuming that there was a penalty."

"Yeah, offside, defense," Dad said.

"Well, at least that helped," I said.

"Follow my light, Edward," Dad said. He shined a penlight into my eyes, and then he moved it in all directions. I followed the light.

"Well, that looks good, but you're done for the night," Dad said.

"Why, Dad?" I asked.

"Because you got knocked out. You don't play for the rest of the night," Dad said. "I'll tell Coach Davis."

"Dad, that's not fair," I said.

"I think we'll win," Dad said. "The defense will continue to hold them, even if we don't score again."

"Dad, you're not being fair," I said.

"No, I'd bench anyone who got knocked out for the rest of the game. You know I don't treat you any differently than the rest of the team," Dad said. He left me and walked up to Coach Davis. They talked together for several minutes, and then Coach Davis nodded. He looked at me and nodded again. Dad left the sideline and went back into the stands. I threw my helmet down.

Coach Davis walked over to me. "You're benched, Cullen. Take it easy and let the rest of the team bring this one home for you," he said.

"I can play, Coach," I said.

"Stand up, Cullen," Coach Davis said.

I stood up and immediately got dizzy. Coach Davis pushed my shoulder, and I sat down hard.

"I thought you were ready to play, Cullen," Coach Davis said. "You can't stand up."

"Okay, okay," I said. "I'll sit here…for now."

"Yeah, you do that, okay?" Coach Davis said. I nodded and watched as the second string quarterback took the field. They were again held to three and out. I was disappointed. This guy couldn't do anything. All he had to do was hand it off to the running backs, and they would do all of the work for him, and he couldn't even do that right. During the defense's turn, Jasper made his way over to me.

"Are you okay, man?" Jasper asked.

"No, Dad benched me for the rest of the game," I said.

"Why?" he asked.

"Because I got knocked out," I said. "I don't think there's any other reason."

"And Coach is going along with it?" Jasper asked.

"Yeah," I said. "It's not fair. I wasn't out long."

"Gotta go," Jasper said as the defense held them to three and out. Jasper ran back out onto the field. He was able to snatch a horrible pass out of the air and ran it for forty yards, gaining us a first down during our next possession, and Michael ran for another first down. All in all, he was able to advance us far enough to put us in field goal range, so we went up another 3 points.

When Jasper came back to the side lines, I congratulated him on his spectacular catch. He knew the catch was all him, not to mention the run. "You are an amazing player, Jasper. I'm honored to be able to work with you. You make me look good. You're even making Kevin look sort of good," I said.

"No, not even Michael and I can make Kevin look good. You make the two of us look good. When you lay the ball right into my hands, you make me look good. God, Edward, I miss you in there," Jasper said.

During the next defensive possession, Eric, one of the defensive ends, made an interception and ran it all the way back for another touchdown. Another 6 points, and the point after made it another 7 points. This team wasn't missing me. The end of the third period sounded.

The fourth quarter happened in much the same way. It was mostly back and forth, three and out, their possession, then ours. We held them scoreless, and we didn't score again. The final score was 69-0. By the time the game was over, I could stand without getting dizzy. I walked onto the field and shook hands with the other team's quarterback, and then I made my way back to the side line and began celebrating with the team. We made our way back to the field house where Coach Davis gave us our end of game speech and told us to hit the showers. I got my shower and met Bella at the tree outside of the field house.

"Edward, your dad told me that you got knocked out. Are you feeling all right?" Bella asked.

"Sure. I was a bit dizzy for a little while, but I'm okay now. I just have a little headache," I said.

"I'll drive us home," Bella said.

"Don't you wanna go to the party?" I asked.

"No, not really. I think we should go home and get you to bed. You had a head injury tonight, and I think we should take it easy," Bella said.

"Oh, okay. If you insist. You and Dad, treating me like a baby. I swear, you'd think I'm two years old or something," I said, taking her hand and walking her to the car. "I guess you wanna drive, too, don't you?"

"Yep," she said, hand held out for the keys. I handed them over with a sigh.

"Do you want me to suck my thumb for you, or are you gonna get me a pacifier?" I asked.

"Whichever makes you happy, Edward. Really, do you think I'm treating you like a baby? I'm just trying to take care of you. It would be worse if I didn't care enough about you right now to take care of you, wouldn't it?" Bella asked.

"Yeah, you're right. That would hurt much worse," I said. "Thank you for caring, Bella."

"I do love you, Edward."

"And I love you, too, Bella." I leaned over the seat and kissed her. She didn't pull away. It was the first kiss she'd allowed me to give her in a while, and it felt so good. I moved even closer to her in the car. I took her in my arms, pulling her body closer to mine, and she didn't pull away. I deepened the kiss, and she didn't pull away. I broke the kiss and whispered in her ear, "Thank you, sweetheart. That was exquisite." Then I kissed her under her ear, down her neck, and onto the front of her throat. That was when she pushed me away. Her eyes were closed, and she was breathing hard.

"Edward, no. Not here. We're not gonna do this here. We're not gonna do this right now," she said, and then she amended it to, "Not now."

I sat back up in my seat and pulled my seatbelt on. "Okay, Bella. Not now," I said, adjusting myself in the seat to make sitting a little more comfortable. She reached over and put her seatbelt on, and then she started the car and drove us home. Once we reached home, she didn't wait on me to open her door for her. She got out at the same time I did, and we headed for the house. I opened the front door for her, and we went inside.

We headed for the bedroom and got dressed for bed. I went to her side, and I took her in my arms again. I began to kiss her, at first chastely, then going deeper, finally allowing our kisses to take over my world. I fisted my hand in her hair and, with my other hand, pulled her body into mine, showing her how badly I wanted her. "Bella, please," I begged between kisses.

I picked her up as if she weighed nothing and carried her to our bed where I lay her down, climbing in beside her. I pressed my body into hers to show her my need for her, and she nodded. We undressed slowly, taking time to be gentle and caring. As I was about to make love to my wife, she acted as if she had come out of a trance, and she yelled, "No!"

I immediately stopped what I was doing and looked at her. She had started shaking and crying. I moved away from her and asked, "Bella, what's wrong?"

"Don't touch me!" she cried out. "Don't you touch me!" She curled up in a little ball.

I got out of the bed and put on my pajama bottoms. I went over and picked up her night shirt and took it over to her. "Here, Bella. Here's your night shirt. You wanna get dressed," I said, disappointment evident in my voice. She took it and pulled it on over her head. I turned and left the room. I went to the couch in the den and sat down. To say I was disappointed was putting it mildly, but I wasn't angry. Bella had to be able to forgive me in her own time. At least I was allowed in the same house. I had pushed too far tonight. Stupid me. If only I had stopped with the kissing, we might still be in each other's arms.


	19. Chapter 19

Disclaimer – Stephenie Meyers owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.

A special thanks goes out to my beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 19

The Headache

BPOV

I don't know why I panicked like I did. We had been about to make love, and a picture of him in front of that girl had popped into my head. I couldn't allow us to continue. I could hear the disappointment in his voice when he gave me my night shirt. I had to go to him. Carlisle had told me to stick close to him tonight, to make sure he was all right, and I had just shoved him away from me. How was I going to make sure that he was all right if he wasn't even in the same room as me?

"Edward," I called as I got out of bed.

"Yeah," he answered from the front of the house.

"I'm so sorry," I said. "I didn't mean to push you away."

"It's okay," he said. "I deserved it. I don't deserve you."

"Yes, you do. I'm just not ready, yet. Please understand. I close my eyes, and I still see you and her," I tried to explain to him.

"You weren't seeing her when we were kissing at the football field," he said.

"No, you're right. That was all you. I'm sorry. Come back to bed and hold me, please."

"Are you sure? Bella, I don't want to pressure you," he said.

"I couldn't be more certain of anything. Come on; let's go listen to the baby's heartbeat."

"Yeah, sure," he said, and I could tell he was disappointed by my choice of activity, but he followed me anyway. We crawled into bed, and I lay onto my back so he could use the Doppler, and we could listen to our baby's heartbeats. It wasn't long before he found it. We focused on the sound for several minutes, fascinated by the fact our baby was growing in there. We could hear it moving around, but I still couldn't feel it moving. It would be several more weeks before it was big enough for me to feel it, if it went anything like my last pregnancy.

Edward wiped the goo off of my belly, and put the Doppler up. Then he lay down next to me. He wrapped me in his arms, placing one hand over my stomach. It was comforting for him to sleep with one hand over our baby. It also made me feel protected. The other hand, he wrapped under my neck and usually held my hand until I fell asleep. Then he kissed me behind my ear.

"Good night, my Bella," he said.

"Good night, Edward," I said. "I hope you can have some wonderful dreams."

"You, too."

The next morning, we woke up in the same position we fell asleep in. Edward was still holding me. I needed to go to the bathroom something awful, and I didn't want to wake him up. I tried to slip from his hands unnoticed, but I wasn't able to.

"Where are you going? It's Saturday morning," he said, turning over to look at me as I walked across the room.

"To the bathroom. I've gotta pee," I told him. "I'm so sorry I woke you up. Go back to sleep."

"Would you bring me some Tylenol and some water? I've got a splitting headache this morning," he said.

"Sure. Do we need to call Carlisle?" I asked from the bathroom.

"No. Just some Tylenol," he answered. I finished up in the bathroom and brought him the Tylenol.

"Are you sure?" I asked. "He's only a phone call away, and you did hit your head pretty hard last night."

"I'm sure, Bella. I hit my head last night. I'd think I'd have a headache today, wouldn't you? Let's give the Tylenol time to work, and if it doesn't, then we can call, okay?" he said.

"Sounds like a plan," I said, coming back to bed. I crawled in next to him and wrapped myself in his arms. "I wanna snuggle before it's time to get up. Can we do that?" I asked.

"Absolutely," he said. "Nothing more than snuggle?"

"You have a headache, silly boy," I said.

"Damn headache," Edward said. I laughed, and I snuggled down into his body. He kissed the top of my head, and I sighed in peace. I just lay there, content and happy for the longest time. I may have even fallen asleep. I know Edward did, because the next thing I knew he was crying out for me not to leave him, and he was sorry for everything.

I woke him up, and he held me even closer to his body. He kissed me on the top of the head again, and soon those kisses progressed to real kisses, ones I returned. There were tears on his face, and I couldn't stand to see him crying over something that wasn't totally his fault. In fact, most of the situation hadn't been his fault. He wasn't complicit in the activities I was holding against him, and I kissed him even deeper, holding him tighter to me. I could tell when he shifted gears, when he shifted from kissing for the sake of kissing, to kissing as a precursor for making love. I thought about pulling away again, but that time my wits were with me, and I knew Edward wasn't responsible for everything that had happened. I was going to fight the picture of him that was threatening to invade my mind, and instead, I was going to concentrate on him and me, just the two of us and what was happening between us, right now. I could feel the changes coming in the way that he approached me, and I responded back the way that I knew that he wanted me to react. I kissed and touched him back. And when the time came, I didn't pull away, but instead, I pressed forward. I allowed him to make love to me that Saturday morning. I allowed for us to make love to each other. I think I had truly forgiven him, in that moment, for the first time.

After we had finished, and we were again snuggling in each other's arms, I looked into his eyes. "Edward, I love you," I said.

"I love you, too," he said.

"I really mean it. I love you with all of my heart. I'm ready to put all of this heartbreak behind us. I don't know what has happened to us this year, but I'm ready for all of this drama to stop. Aren't you?"

"Yeah, Bella. I am, too. I'm ready to get our lives back on the right path. I'm ready to have this baby and get our family on the straight and narrow," he said.

"Do you think we can do it?" I asked. "Just start over today, as if today is the start of our year?"

"Yeah. I think so. It'll be a short football season, but I think it'll work." We both laughed. "In that case, I think I should make love with my wife again," Edward said.

"Your wife agrees with you," I said. We made love again, and again, and again. We weren't quiet about it either, forgetting that Jasper and Alice were most likely just down the hall.

When we got out of bed, we found Jasper and Alice in the kitchen. They were making lunch for us. Jasper had a shit-eating grin on his face when we came into the room…one we couldn't help but return to him. Alice just looked at us.

"Having a good time?" she asked.

"Wonderful time," I answered.

"That's great. It's almost time for the game," she said. "I thought we were all gonna watch this one, so we decided to cook when it didn't sound like the two of you were gonna get up anytime soon."

"They've cooked for us plenty of times, Alice. It's the least that we could do to return the favor," Jasper said, still smiling at us, the two of us still holding hands.

"Hey, Jasper, did you know Bella and I have decided to start the year over today? Nothing that has happened this year before now counts," Edward said.

"Really? That's great, you two. I'm so happy to hear that," Jasper said.

"Yeah, it makes for a short football season, though," I said. Jasper laughed at the joke.

"Speaking of football, how's the head, Edward?" Jasper asked.

"Splitting headache," Edward admitted. "I think I could use some Motrin."

"But, you just took some Tylenol. You haven't even given it a chance to work," I said.

"It's hurting worse now," Edward said. "I just want some relief." He left to get some Motrin from the bathroom and then came back, drinking some tea and taking them.

"Are you sure we don't need to call your dad if you're hurting that badly?" I asked.

"Can't we leave Dad out of this? He benched me last night. I'm still kinda pissed at him," Edward said.

"Sorry, Edward, but we're starting over today. You can't be pissed at your Dad. Last night doesn't count," I said.

"Okay, I'm not pissed at him. I just don't wanna bother him with a simple headache, okay?" he asked.

"Okay," I agreed. We filled our plates with the tacos Jasper and Alice had made and headed into the den to watch the game.

The game was great. Unfortunately, Emmett got put out in the third quarter with an injured ankle, but we won anyway. We were so worried about Emmett, but we knew he would be calling his parents, and they would call Alice as soon as they heard anything.

After the game, Edward asked Jasper to help him in the attic to get out my maternity clothes. He remembered I'd mentioned it earlier in the week. I wanted to get at least the pants out because my blue jeans were hurting my stomach.

Then we played with the Wii until we got the call from Alice's parents. Emmett had only sprained his ankle. He should be able to play in next week's rivalry game. We were thrilled that the injury wasn't more serious. It had been a bad week for football. Luckily Jasper wasn't injured, too.

We played video games for the rest of the night, and then we went to bed. Edward and I held each other after we listened to the baby's heartbeat, cuddling with each other. He still had a headache, and I was worried about him. I was ready to call Carlisle about it, but he insisted he was all right. I finally gave in, and we fell asleep in each other's arms.

The next day, we went to church while Jasper and Alice slept in. We sat with Carlisle and Esme. When Carlisle asked Edward how he felt, Edward told him he was fine. He never mentioned his headache. I was about to mention it for him, but he squeezed my hand, and when I looked at him, he shook his head at me. I nodded at him against my better judgment.

On the way home, I asked, "Edward, why didn't you tell your dad you're still having headaches?"

"I don't wanna take any chances he'll bench me from practice. He's a little nuts sometimes, and I don't wanna give him any excuses," he said.

"But if he thinks you shouldn't play with a headache after you got knocked out, then he should know all of the facts, don't you think. I don't think he'd bench you for no reason," I said.

"I'd rather not take a chance. Besides, the headache is down to a dull roar now," he said. "I'm sure it'll be better by tomorrow. It's gotten better every day so far."

"But if it's only down to a dull roar, that's still a pretty bad headache. I think you should tell him."

"No, Bella. That's my final decision on the matter."

"Okay. I just don't agree with it. I don't want you getting hurt worse."

"I'm not gonna get hurt. It's just a headache."

"But you never have headaches."

"Please just drop it, okay?"

"I don't agree with you."

"You've said that before."

"I just want you to understand it."

"I do, but it is my body."

"No, it's my body, too."

"Bella!"

"Oh, okay."

"Then you'll tell your dad."

"No."

"Please."

"No. Discussion is over."

"Edward, you are supposed to listen to your wife."

"And you are supposed to listen to your husband, and I said, 'No,' and I meant it. End of discussion."

"Edward,"

"No, Bella. End of discussion."

I huffed into the seat of the car. I didn't like losing debates with Edward, especially when I knew I was right, like this one. I knew I should tell Carlisle that Edward was having bad headaches and had been since he was knocked out Friday night. Edward was blinded by wanting to play football. I was worried about him.

When we got home, Edward joined Jasper and Alice and went to play some video games while I cooked us some lunch. After we ate and cleaned up the kitchen, I begged off from playing video games and said I wanted a little nap. No one objected, and I went into our bedroom and closed the door. I went straight to the computer and looked up "concussion" and "head injury" and "headache" on the internet and found out that after a concussion, an ongoing headache was common and didn't always mean something was wrong. I also learned that it could be bad. I wasn't any further along in dealing with Edward's headaches at the end of my search than I was at the beginning. It could be normal, or it could be bad. I really wanted Carlisle to know about the headache so he could check Edward out and decide for sure if there was something wrong with him, but Edward was being a stick in the mud.

I eventually came out of the bedroom and joined the others. I played some video games with them until it was time for Alice and Jasper to go so we could work on our homework. Edward and I went to the bedroom and worked until supper time, and then we sat down at the table to eat. During supper, I asked him about his headache, and he said he was fine.

"Are you lying to me? I thought that was the one thing we would never do was to lie to each other," I said.

"Okay, Bella. It still hurts, but not as bad as it did this morning. I took some Motrin, and it calmed down some," he said.

"Okay, does it hurt on one side more than the other?"

"Yeah, it hurts on the right side, mostly. Why do you ask?"

"Just wondering," I said. "Are you nauseated with it?"

"Sometimes, when it hurts the worst."

"Have you puked with it?"

"No."

"Any blurry vision?"

"No. Where are these questions coming from? Did you talk to Dad?" he asked.

"No. I wouldn't go behind your back. I looked it up on the internet," I said.

"Bella, I'm fine. It's just a headache. I got knocked in the head, and now my head hurts. That's normal."

"Edward, you got knocked in the head two nights ago, and you're still having severe headaches. That's not normal. Why don't you just let your dad check you out?"

"Because he would bench me, that's why!" Edward yelled.

"You don't know that," I yelled back.

"Yes, I do," Edward said.

"What makes you think so?"

"Because I have a headache, and I got knocked out. It's a no brainer. He would bench me, Bella!"

"Then maybe you need to be benched," I said.

"Not for the championship game," he said.

"The game isn't important when it comes to your health, Edward."

"The game is all important. It matters for Jasper to get his scholarship, for me to get recruited, and for the school to win three in a row."

"Not at the expense of your health, Edward."

"Nothing is wrong with me, Bella. It's just a headache."

"You can't be sure of that Edward. For me and the baby, you have to take care of you first before the team and before the game. If you were to get hurt again, this time it could be serious. What would the baby and I do?"

"I'm not gonna get hurt again! I've only been sacked once in the past two years. What's the chance I'll be sacked again?"

"Next to none. I know that, Edward, but that doesn't mean that's the only way you could get hurt. Please, for the baby and me," I said.

"Okay, Bella. When you put it that way, I don't have a choice. I'll call Dad." I handed him his cell phone. He reluctantly took it, and he dialed his dad's number.

"Dad, hi. Bella is making me call you. I've got a headache. I've had it ever since Friday night. It's pretty bad, and I can't get it to go away with Motrin or Tylenol." He listened for a little while and answered Carlisle's questions. "Okay, we'll meet you at the ER in fifteen minutes." He hung up the phone, and said, "You win. We'll get it checked out. You wanna drive?"

"Sure, no problem. Let's go," I said. I drove us to the hospital, and we checked Edward in. We told the nurse that his dad was coming in to see him, and she led us to a room to wait for him to get here. She took Edward's vital signs and recorded them in his chart. We looked at the magazines while we waited. Soon Carlisle came into the room.

"So you've had this headache since Friday night?" he asked. Edward nodded. "Where is the headache?" Edward pointed to the right side of his head, near his temple. "What does it feel like?"

"It's a sharp pain, on and off, but it's throbbing most of the time," he said.

"Are you nauseated with it?" Carlisle asked.

"Not really," Edward said.

"Any light sensitivity?"

"No, Sir. Not really," Edward said.

He then examined Edward. He tested his eyes, head, and neck. Then he ordered a CT scan. The radiology people soon came to get Edward and took him to do the CT. Carlisle and I waited in the exam room for him to get back. He asked me how we were doing, and I told him that things were getting better.

It wasn't long before the radiology tech brought Edward back into the room, and Carlisle left to go discuss the CT scan with the radiologist who was on duty. That left Edward and me alone. I went over to him and hugged him as he stepped back onto the gurney in the room.

"You sure are making a big deal out of nothing. Are you gonna eat your words when this test comes back normal?" Edward asked me.

"Sure. I just wanted to make sure you're all right. That's all. I don't wanna risk losing you," I said, and I leaned over the gurney and planted a kiss on his lips. Our kiss was broken by someone clearing their throat in the doorway. I blushed as I looked up and into Carlisle's face. "I was just keeping him occupied," I said.

"Mmm hmm," Carlisle said. Then he walked into the room. "There is an obvious coup-contra coup injury to your brain, Edward, but I kind of expected it because you were knocked unconscious Friday night, and it isn't that bad. That's the bad news. The good news is there isn't any bleed."

"In English, please, Dad," Edward said.

"Your brain is bruised on the front and the back from the lick you took, however, there isn't any bleeding from the bruises or from any injured blood vessels. The bruises are what is most likely causing the headaches."

"So I can still work out with the team?" Edward asked.

"No contact work outs or weight lifting until the headaches are gone," Carlisle said.

"But I can still throw the ball if they don't play contact with me even if I still have the headaches?" Edward asked.

"Sure, Edward, but I mean no contact," Carlisle said. "I'll write you a note to Coach Davis."

"Thanks, Dad," Edward said. Carlisle left the room to get the note and a prescription for some pain medication.

"There, see? He didn't bench you," I said.

"Okay, you were right," Edward begrudgingly admitted. "You don't have to say, 'I told you so.'"


	20. Chapter 20

Disclaimer – Stephenie Meyers owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.

A special thanks goes out to my beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 20

Championship Game

EPOV

The next week was the week of the football finals. Needless to say, the teachers weren't able to keep the students focused on school work. The funny thing, though, was they seemed to be as excited as we were. People were wishing the football team good luck from all directions. They would come up to our table at lunch and at break. People we didn't know would wish Jasper and me luck out of the blue. They wanted to shake our hands or pat us on the back. It didn't take long to begin to wear thin on me, and Jasper seemed to get tired of it just as quickly as I did. Unfortunately, it wasn't just strangers. Jill and her sidekick seemed to be wherever we were.

"Edward, Jasper, we're so proud of you!" Jill said on Wednesday at morning break as she pushed past Bella to get into my face. Bella, who had started wearing her maternity clothes on Monday, almost fell from her push.

"Would you get the hell away from me?" I shouted as I reached to keep Bella on her feet. I pulled her into my arms, and, shaking, held her close to me. I'd had a flashback of Bella falling down the stairs two and a half years ago. I rested my head on top of Bella's as I held her close to me.

"Edward, I'm okay," Bella said. "I didn't fall." She wrapped her arms around my neck. "Edward, baby, I'm okay. It's okay." I slowly stopped shaking.

I looked up at Jill. My voice hard, I said, "If you ever come near my wife again, there will be hell to pay. I don't care what happens to me, if you ever touch her again, I will see to it that you never set foot in this school again."

"Edward, I'm okay. Don't get in trouble again. Not because of her. She's so not worth it," Bella said.

"I will protect you and our baby. Your protection is of the utmost importance to me. I don't give a shit if I get licks or even suspended. If she touches you again, I will track her down, and I will see to it that her infatuation with me is ended."

"But Dad might have to pay you a visit again, and we don't want that," Bella said under her breath.

"If it means protecting you, I don't care. He can arrest me again, and I'll go to jail. I don't care, Bella. Nobody is gonna hurt you, ever again," I said louder than I should have.

"You've been arrested before?" Jill asked, her eyes wide and her mouth open.

"That's none of your business," Bella said. "Our lives are none of your business."

"Just get out of here," I said.

Right about then, Mrs. Ammon came up to us. "What's going on over here? Edward, I can hear your voice all the way across the yard. What's wrong?"

"Mrs. Ammon, if you don't get this little girl away from me, I will," I said.

"Jill, isn't it? What's going on?" Mrs. Ammon asked.

"Well, I just came over to wish Edward and Jasper good luck on Friday, and he blew up at me," Jill said.

"Edward, everybody has been wishing you well all week. I know that the two of you have a history, but surely you can just say thanks, and she'd go away," Mrs. Ammon said.

"You'd think so, wouldn't you? She's a stalker, Mrs. Ammon. She nearly pushed Bella down to get to me, and you can imagine what that did to me. She just won't leave me or Jasper alone. I'm ready to get a restraining order against her," I said.

"Mrs. Ammon, he threatened me. He said if I ever came near her again, that he'd do something horrible to me," Jill said.

"Then maybe you'd better take the hint and not go near him or Bella again," Mrs. Ammon said. "Jill, they are married, and Bella is expecting again. They are a family, and your insistence on interfering with their family is getting annoying, even to the rest of us."

I could see that Jill was standing there with her mouth wide open and tears gathering in her eyes. I didn't feel sorry for her in the least. At last, someone else had told her like it was.

"By the way, congratulations, you two. I don't think I've told you how happy I am for you about the new baby, yet. If anyone deserves to catch a break, it's you two."

"Thanks, Mrs. Ammon. That means a lot," Bella said.

"Now, Edward, try to keep the threats down to a minimum. By all rights, I should have sent you back to see Mr. Butler. You can't threaten freshmen, not even if they are tiresome."

"She almost pushed Bella down. I won't tolerate that. If she comes near Bella again, I'll give her something to think about."

"You can't tell me that, Edward."

"Sorry," I said. Mrs. Ammon walked away when the bell rang to end morning break.

The rest of the week went better than Wednesday morning did, and by Thursday I was back to full workouts with the team. By Saturday, we were raring to go for the State Championship game. We would be playing in Seattle, again. We arrived at the school by noon in order to leave on time, as the game was at seven o'clock that night. We rode the busses to the stadium and began our workouts. The cheerleaders began putting up banners on the sidelines. I ran through some routes with Jasper and the other wide receivers as we began to get ready for the game. I noticed several men in suites watching us warm up. When Coach took us into the locker room to dress out, he came up to Jasper and me and told us that those men were scouts, and they were here specifically to watch us play. I could tell Jasper wasn't the least bit nervous. After all, we'd been playing in front of scouts since the first game of the season. Why get nervous now?

When the time came to do our final warm-up, we took the field again. By that time, the other team was also on the field. I could tell they were nervous because they paused in their warm-up to look at us as we made our way onto the field. Their coach didn't miss a beat in getting their attention right back onto the task at hand.

We completed our warm-up and went back to our locker room. Coach gave us our peptalk, and we got ready to take the field for the game. Our captains were the same five of us, with me being the center captain.

The time came for us to take the field. We walked down the hallway that led from the locker room to the field. I had done that walk for the past two years. That year, my third year, would be my last. I was kind of nostalgic, and I was no longer in awe of the stadium as I was my first year here. I enjoyed the walk down the hallway to the field and to our breakthrough banner. When the band started our fight song, Jasper and I took the lead and broke through the banner on our way to the sideline. We gathered around Coach Davis who gave us the signal to get ready to go to mid-field for the coin toss.

When the umpire called us to mid-field, Jasper and I went with the other team captains to the fifty yard line. We were playing as home team, so the other team got to call the coin toss. They won the toss and chose to get the ball during the second half, so I picked the goal we wanted to play, and we took the field to receive the ball. Our special receiving team took the ball at the fifteen yard line and ran it back past the fifty to their forty-five yard line. Then I took the field with the offense. We played the half of our life. We scored on every possession, leading the other team by 63 at the half. When we went back to the locker room during halftime, Coach Davis just congratulated us. He told us we were playing the game of our lives; we were doing wonderfully; and all we needed to do was to keep up the good work. He didn't give us our usual pep talk.

When we went back out onto the field for the second half, we just continued to control the game. We finished the game with a resounding win, 94 – 14. Jasper was spectacular. I knew he would get to go to any team he wanted to play for. I had a feeling I would be able to, as well. When the game was over, they set up the stage mid-field to award the state championship trophy and the most valuable player trophy. I'd won it two years running. I hoped it would go to Jasper this year. He played just as well as I'd played, and he was never recognized for it.

Coach Davis and Mr. Green made their way to mid-field with Mr. Bradley, the State Football Federation Representative. Mr. Bradley said, "May I have your attention? I'm here to award the State Championship trophy. For the first time in the history of the Washington State High School Football Association, a team has won the state championship for three years in a row. Today, I have the honor of presenting the trophy to Forks High School under the leadership of Coach Leo Davis." He handed the trophy to Coach Davis. The crowd went crazy. "Now, Coach Davis. It is your responsibility to name your player of the year."

Coach Davis stepped in front of the microphone. "Hi, everyone. I don't think this is gonna come as a surprise to any of you. Our player of the year is none other than

Edward Cullen." The guys on the team clapped me on the back as I made my way up to the microphone. I shook Coach Davis's hand and took the trophy from his hand. I turned and walked back to the team. I walked up to Jasper and apologized.

"Dude, I'm so sorry. You deserve this as much as I do. I wish that you'd gotten it."

"Nah. You deserve it. Without you, we've proven that there is no offense," Jasper said. "I feel sorry for the team next year."

"Yeah, they're gonna have a hard time, but it's without both of us, not just me," I said.

"Yeah, that's true," Jasper said, and we high fived each other. The team came over to me and offered me their congratulations. I shook their hands. We basically just stood around on the field.

Finally, Coach Davis left the microphone and joined us on the field. The crowd was still standing and clapping. "Congratulations, Edward. I have a feeling that you'll be hearing from the recruiters soon. You and Jasper have definitely made quite a name for yourselves."

By that time, Alice had made her way through the crowd and into Jasper's arms. "Congratulations, baby!" she said. "I knew you could do it! Congratulations to you, too, Edward. Both of you played a great game."

"Thanks, Alice," I said.

I left the field to go into the stands and found Bella. I took her into my arms and kissed her. "I'm so proud of you," she said. "I knew we would win, but not by this much. You did so well. I knew he would pick you as player of the year again!"

"Jasper deserved it, too," I said.

"No, you deserved it," Bella said.

"Well, thank you," I said. Everyone near us began to congratulate me. I thanked them, and as the team began to make the way off of the field, I told Bella I was gonna go clean up, and I hoped she'd wait on me. She told me of course she'd would, so I left to go to the locker room with the team.

When we made it to the locker room, Coach Davis told us how proud he was. Then he told us to hit the showers. Once we were cleaned up, he made sure we had all of our equipment. Then we went back out to the field. Most of the fans were still in the stands. They stood as we walked back into the stadium and began to clap again. Coach Davis held up his hands, and the crowd got quiet.

"Thank you, folks. This team has been an amazing group of boys to work with. I can't tell you how incredible the past three years have been. I thank you for allowing me to work with your kids for the past three years. Now, let's go home," Coach Davis said. The crowd applauded again, and then they began coming out of the stands to find the player they had come to support.

I found Mom, Dad, and Bella again. They each hugged me, and Mom had tears in her eyes. Bella took me into her arms, and I kissed her again. We walked towards the bus, and as I got ready to board, I pulled her with me. She waved at Mom and Dad and walked with me to my seat. I pulled her into my lap, and I kissed her again. The people sitting around us started to tease us, and I broke things off to tell them to back off. Then I went back to kissing Bella. By the time that we were on the road, we were making out quite heavily. I was kissing her deeply. The surrounding guys were still watching.

"Don't you guys have anything better to do?" I asked.

"No, not really. You two are hot together," Thomas said.

"Well, I highly recommend finding your soul mate and marrying her," I said, and Bella blushed.

"No thanks. I'm not ready for a kid, yet," Thomas said.

"Well, I guess we can understand that," I said, "but it isn't the end of the world. We're excited about our baby. We can hear its heartbeat, and we should be able to feel it move soon."

"Yeah, but my dad would kill me if I got my girl pregnant," Thomas said.

"Tell me about it," I said. "The first time was interesting, to say the least."

"I didn't mean to interrupt you two," Thomas said.

"No, it's okay. What's up, Thomas? Is something wrong?" I asked, noticing the way that he didn't turn around.

"Yeah, Edward. I think Karen is pregnant. I don't know what to do," Thomas said.

"Has she taken a test, yet?" Bella asked.

"No, I don't think so. She's late," Thomas said. "I'm scared."

"Well, we need to get her a test," Bella said. "We'll stop by the store when we get home. Then you can take it to her."

"Have you talked to Coach?" I asked.

"No," Thomas said. "Why would I talk to Coach?"

"'Cause he's a great friend to have in this situation," I said. "He takes care of you. You should talk to him."

"I don't know. I'm just glad to talk to you. I've wanted to say something for a couple of days now, but I didn't know how," Thomas said.

"You should have just said something. I would've been here for you. You know that, at least I hope you know that," I said.

"Yeah, I guess so," Thomas said.

We went back to making out, and when we got home, Thomas followed us to the drug store where Bella went inside and bought a pregnancy test. She brought it outside and handed it to Thomas. "Here you go. Just get this to Karen. All she has to do is pee on the stick. A plus sign means that she's pregnant. A minus means that she isn't," Bella said.

"Give us a call if you need us," I said. I shook his hand and wished him good luck. It was close to midnight by the time we got home, and we went straight to bed. We woke up early the next morning to go to church where everyone congratulated me. You'd think everyone at church was at the game. After church, no one was talking about the sermon, and everyone was talking about the game. I had never shaken more hands in my life. Everyone was asking me where I was going to play college ball. I just told them we hadn't decided anything, yet.

When we got home, Jasper and Alice were up, and they had lunch started. Jasper told me that Thomas had called, and I excused myself to go to our bedroom to call him back.

"Thomas, this is Edward. I'm sorry I missed your call. Did you get your answer?" I said after he picked up the phone.

"Yeah. It's bad news, Edward," Thomas said.

"You can't talk," I said.

"No. Not right now. I'm having lunch with my family," Thomas said.

"Do you wanna call me back when you can talk?" I asked him.

"Sure. That sounds like a plan," Thomas said.

"Okay. I'll be looking for your call," I said. "Bye."

"Bye," Thomas said, and he hung up the phone.

"What'd he say?" Bella asked me.

"Just that it's bad news. He couldn't talk. He must have been around his family," I told her. "He's gonna call back later." I got dressed in more comfortable clothes and went back up front.

"Is everything okay?" Jasper asked.

"Yeah. He just wanted to talk," I said. "He'll call back later."

We ate lunch and sat down to play video games. Halfway through our third game, my phone rang again. I got up and went to our bedroom to answer it. It was Thomas. We talked for about thirty minutes about Karen, him, and their new problem. He wasn't ready to ask her to marry him, and he didn't want to become a father. He wanted her to have an abortion, but he didn't have the money to pay for it. He didn't think that he could go to his parents for the money. He didn't know what Karen wanted to do, and he was scared. I promised I wouldn't tell anybody besides Bella, and I hung up the phone after I told him that he needed to talk to Karen.

I went back up front and nodded to Bella. Jasper just looked at me. I sat back down, and we started playing again. "I guess you aren't gonna tell me what's going on, are you?" he asked.

"I promised Thomas I wouldn't talk to anyone else about it," I said.

"Okay. I can guess why he'd be talking to you. I would guess he and Karen are in trouble, aren't they? I overheard him talking to you on the bus. I'm sorry for him. Karen's parents aren't gonna be happy at all. They're a really religious family. She's gonna be in for it," Jasper said. "I think they're Catholic, even."

"Oh, man. I didn't know that," I said. "Poor Thomas. He never mentioned that."

"Yeah, she actually had an attitude about you and Bella when you got pregnant with Victoria. She had some things to say. I was glad you never heard some of her opinions," Jasper said.

"What kind of things?" Bella said.

"It was nothing," Jasper said.

"It was obviously something if you brought it up," Bella said.

"Oh, just that you two were sinners, and you both would burn in hell for being together, and things like that. Just Catholic stuff."

"And I was trying to help them," Bella said.

"Thomas is my friend. I still wanna help them," I said. "He can't help what a girl he happens to be dating has been taught all of her life. I'm sure she would take everything she said back if she had a chance," I said.

"Boy, things do come back and bite you in the ass, don't they?" Bella said.

"Yep. But I wouldn't wish this on anyone. Especially people who aren't willing or able to handle it," I said. "He isn't willing to step up and be a father. He wants her to have an abortion."

"Oh, no. That's too bad," Bella said. "What a shame!"

"Not all of us are as mature as you two are," Alice said.

"What do you mean, Alice?" Bella asked.

"I wouldn't keep it if I got pregnant," Alice said. "I'm not ready to give up my freedom."

"You're kidding? I can't believe that, Alice!" Bella said. "You wouldn't kill your child!"

"I just hope I'm never faced with that situation," Alice said.

"Me, too. Keep taking those pills, sweetheart," Jasper said.

Alice laughed, and Bella took my hand. I squeezed hers, and she leaned back into me. I rubbed her stomach, glad we made the decision we did. I couldn't wait to have our baby, and I leaned forward and whispered that into her ear. She leaned back and turned her head so I could kiss her.

"I love you, Bella Cullen," I said.

"I love you, too, Edward Cullen," she said.


	21. Chapter 21

Disclaimer – Stephenie Meyers owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.

A special thanks goes out to my beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 21

Trust

BPOV

Edward and I went to school on Monday. There was a ceremony first thing in the morning to present the State Championship trophy to the school. Coach Davis chose Edward to present the trophy to Samantha O'Neill, the Student Council President. Mr. Green was furious he wasn't able to accept the trophy, but Edward had started the tradition three years before when he presented the first championship trophy to the then student council president as the representative of the school. The student body went wild after Edward handed the cup to Samantha, and the band played the fight song for the last time of the season.

The rest of the day was more laid back. The teachers all congratulated him, and they all wanted to know where he was going to play next year. He told them we hadn't decided where we wanted to go yet.

I was one day from being eighteen weeks, and we couldn't be happier about it. I was feeling the baby move, and an ultrasound was scheduled in two weeks to determine the sex of the baby.

When the day came, we were excited to be there. Despite the disapproving looks we received in the waiting room, when the nurse called my name we stood up and followed her to the back of the office with smiles on our faces. She had me change into a gown and lay on the ultrasound table. Five minutes later, the tech, after knocking, entered the room.

She put my name into the computer and said, "Hi," to both of us. We greeted her back, and she began the ultrasound. She measured the head, waist, and femur length of the baby and told us the due date still coincided with my growth. She then looked at the heart, spine, and each of the internal organs. Finally, she looked for the baby's sex. She asked us if we wanted to know, and we told her, "Yes."

"Well, Mr. and Mrs. Cullen, it does seem that you are having a little girl," she said. I grabbed Edward's hand and squeezed. Another little girl. Everything was falling back into place. We'd have to pick out another girl's name. I couldn't wait to tell everyone we were having another girl. Everyone would be so happy. They'd be excited if we were having a boy, but I thought they would be overjoyed because we knew we were having another little girl. My prayers had been answered.

Edward leaned over me with tears in his eyes. He kissed me on the lips, and then he whispered in my ear, "I'm so happy, Bella. I couldn't be happier. We're having a little girl who'll look just like her mother. The world is perfect. I can't wait to tell everybody!" I just nodded and turned my head to kiss him again.

By that time, the technician was wiping off my belly, and she told me to keep on my gown. The nurse would be right with us. She walked out of the room, and our nurse came in. She led us to my exam room and told me to go to the bathroom for a urine sample. I did as she said and then went back to my room. Edward and I waited for Dr. Bush to come in for the rest of my exam which went as expected. Dr. Bush said everything was progressing normally. She had us make an appointment for the next month, and she told me to take it easy on the Christmas treats. I promised her I would, and we went back to school.

During lunch, I told Alice and Jasper that our "it" was in fact another "she," and they were stunned. Alice was convinced it was a boy because I'd had so much trouble with morning sickness. I told her I was sorry, but we were having a little girl, and she could help baby-sit any time she wanted. She was not so enthused about that little fact.

Alice and I talked some more at afternoon break, and we decided we'd go Christmas shopping the next weekend. The guys would have some free time together. We decided to go to Seattle for the day Saturday, and we'd take Alice's car. Edward wasn't thrilled with the idea, but he caved when we invited him to go with us. He decided he'd rather spend the day with Jasper instead.

When Saturday rolled around, Alice and I got up early and headed for Seattle. We shopped all day, and we got most of our shopping done. I even bought some baby clothes. I was so excited about my purchases because it felt like I was really going to be a mom this time. We'd never bought the first thing for Victoria. This time, I was ready. This baby was going to be fine, and we were going to be parents. Our trip home was uneventful. When we pulled into my driveway, I went in to get Edward to come outside and help me unload the car. He was dozing off on the couch with a football game on the TV. I woke him up as gently as I could. I could smell the beer in the room. I was hurt and angry.

"Edward, wake up. I need some help with my packages," I said as I shook his shoulder. He woke up immediately. He sat up, stood from the couch, and followed me to the car. He walked steadily and didn't seem to be drunk. I didn't know when they'd been drinking or where they'd gotten the beer, but I'd seen the cans on the floor. Edward helped me with my packages by taking them all to our bedroom. I kissed him, and while his breath didn't taste like beer, it did taste like toothpaste. He turned to go get another load of packages, but I took his hand and pulled him back into the room.

"Edward. Wait a minute," I said. He stopped and turned around. "Have you been drinking?"

"No, Bella. I promised you I wouldn't ever drink again," he said. "I haven't broken that promise."

"Do you swear it?" I asked.

"You don't believe me?" he asked, pulling his hand away from mine.

"I don't know, Edward. The evidence against you is pretty strong," I said.

"What evidence?" he said stiffly.

"Well, you were asleep when I got here…" I started.

"What? A guy can't take a nap in his own home?" he asked.

"And there were beer cans by the couch, and your breath smells like toothpaste," I said.

"Jasper was sitting on the couch, and I had onions on my burger at lunch. Don't you trust me?" he asked.

"I want to," I said. "I really want to, but you've got to admit your track record isn't all that great."

"I've never lied to you," he said, and he turned and walked out of the room. I followed him through the house. He went to the den and picked up the beer cans and took them to the garbage can in the kitchen, and then he went outside into the backyard, slamming the back door. I leaned against the kitchen counter.

Alice came into the kitchen. "What's going on?"

"I accused Edward of drinking," I said.

"Why'd you do that?" she asked.

"I don't know. He promised me he wouldn't drink again, and then when I saw him asleep on the couch and the beer cans on the floor, I just jumped to conclusions," I said. "He's pissed off."

"Then go apologize to him," Alice said.

"I don't know if I believe him," I said.

"You know you do. When has he ever lied to you?" Alice asked.

"You don't know everything we've gone through, Alice," I said.

"Then tell me," she said.

"I can't do that. That would betray him, and I won't do that," I said.

"Bella, I thought you said your year started over, whatever that means," Alice said.

"Yeah, we did. You're right. I need to go talk to him," I said. "Thanks for the talk." I gave her a hug, and I opened the door to the backyard. I turned on the outdoor light, and I spotted him leaning against the fence. I walked over to him.

"Edward, I am so sorry for accusing you of drinking."

"What made you change your mind?" he asked.

"Alice reminded me we started this year over. You haven't done anything at all to make me distrust you this year," I said.

"So, you still believe I drank the beer. You're just choosing to ignore what you believe because we started over," he said. "I don't accept your apology, Bella."

"Edward, I don't know what I believe. You've been under so much pressure lately, and you like to escape the pressure. I know you like to drink, and we were gone all day. I know you said you wouldn't drink again, but you are in your own home, and what could you do wrong here?" I said.

"Nothing, except break my promise to you," he said, "which I would never do. Bella, the last thing I would ever do is betray your trust. I don't ever wanna be that out of it ever again, whether I'm in my own home or out on the town. I promised you I'd never drink again, and I didn't mean any exceptions associated with that promise."

"Fine, Edward. I hear you, and I'm sorry I accused you. I believe you," I said.

"No, you don't. You're just saying that."

"No, Edward, I'm not. I believe you."

"Well, I don't believe you. Just go back inside," he said.

"Not without you," I said.

"Fine, I'll come back inside." I turned to go back to the house, and he followed me. I sat down on the couch, and he sat down in the recliner across the room from me. He wouldn't look at me.

"Edward, you won't believe what I bought. I got some of the cutest little outfits today. The baby is gonna look so precious in them," I said trying to break some of the tension in the room. "Do you guys wanna see them?"

"Of course they do," Alice said. "Let's go get them." She got up from her seat in Jasper's lap and pulled me up from the couch. We went back to my bedroom, and she helped me get the outfits out of the bags. We could hear Jasper and Edward talking about our fight. I just sat down on the bed and put my head into my hands.

"When am I gonna quit putting my foot in my mouth, Alice?" I asked.

"When you quit loving him," Alice said. "Until then, you're gonna continue to screw up."

"That's not fair. I wanna trust him without a doubt, but so many things have happened I just don't," I said.

"And you won't tell me what," Alice said.

"I can't, Alice. I just can't," I said. "It would ruin my marriage."

"Okay. I believe you, but I can't help you, either, except to tell you he loves you, and you love him, and whatever it is he's done to make you distrust him had to have been major, but bottom line, Bella, is I've never seen Edward love anyone the way that he loves you, and you've been in love with him for as long as I can remember. That has to count for something."

"It does. Trust me. If I didn't love him this much, and if I didn't know he loves me, we wouldn't be together right now."

"That bad? It happened at the frat party, didn't it?"

"Yeah, it did."

"It must have involved his drinking at the party if he promised he wouldn't ever drink again. He did something when he was drunk. Bella, if he was drunk, he couldn't really be held responsible for his actions. He wasn't in his right mind. After all, he didn't cheat or something that bad, did he?" I was silent. I didn't look her in the face. "Bella, did he?" I continued to look into my lap. She took her hands and put them on my shoulders. "Bella, no. Oh, sweetheart. No! I'm so, so sorry. That's why you were crying the next morning. You caught him cheating. What was he doing? Kissing another girl? Come on Bella! You can't go through this alone." I shook my head.

"No, Alice. It wasn't that. Don't worry about it. Okay. Edward and I have moved past that night. I don't wanna think about that night ever again. Please. Don't ever bring that night up again. As my best friend, don't ever bring that night up to either one of us again. Just suffice it to say that whatever happened, he swore he would never drink again."

"Bella, you can't live by his rules. You've gotta be able to talk these things out with your friends. You're gonna go crazy if you have to keep things this serious bottled up inside. You have no one else to talk to about things," Alice said.

"I don't think I would have talked to anyone about this anyway. I'd be too embarrassed," I said. "Now let's get the baby clothes and show the guys."

We finished gathering the clothes and walked up to the front of the house. The guys had finished their conversation and were just sitting there quietly. Alice and I sat down on the couch and held up each of the outfits. The guys "ooh'ed" and "aah'ed" at the appropriate times, and we took the clothes back to the bedroom when we finished showing them. When we came back up front, I heard Edward saying he was getting excited about the baby, and he was really glad we had bought the baby clothes.

I went back and sat on the couch. I could tell that Edward was still angry at me, but I still didn't know if I was sure he was telling the truth or not. I didn't like the feeling of not being able to trust him. How could we get that trust back? I wasn't sure. Would I ever trust him again?


	22. Chapter 22

Disclaimer – Stephenie Meyers owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.

A special thanks goes out to my beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 22

Accidents

EPOV

Bella had accused me of drinking after I'd promised her I wouldn't ever drink again. I hadn't even had the urge when Jasper brought in the beer. I remember all too well what had happened to me the last time I got drunk: I almost lost my family…Bella and my daughter. I know Bella said she wouldn't have taken our daughter away from me, but in the long run, I would have lost them both. And now, now Bella wasn't even able to take my word for the truth. That hurt. I wasn't angry. I knew I'd hurt her, and she had a right to be hurt, but I'd never lied to her, even when it made me look the worst. I'd _never lied_ to her. So for her to not trust my word hurts me to the core.

She tried to cover it up by bringing out the baby clothes, but that just hurt me even worse. I'd always thought we'd buy the first baby things together. Not her and Alice, her and me. Boy, I must be PMS'ing big time. Why are things getting to me so badly? I don't know, but I can barely face her without wanting to cry. That's not me. I'm the football star. If Jasper knew how I really felt, he'd laugh me right out of my own house. Never mind, Edward, you're just being overly sensitive because of the baby. _Yeah, right. I'm sure that's it_.

I didn't know what to do at the moment, but the last thing I wanted to do was stay in this room, listening to those three talking about nothing. Why did I feel as if my life was falling apart? I knew everyone thought my life was just fine and dandy. I had the girl of my dreams. In fact, I was married to her. We were able to sleep together every night. Everyone thought our life was perfect. Not. She didn't trust me. She wouldn't even let me touch her anymore. We were having a baby, and we were only teenagers, though that wasn't really bad. I'd gotten used to that idea. It was, after all, our fault. We'd never really had the chance to be a normal couple because our friends were over every weekend and whatever free time we did have without them was spent on homework. Then, there was an enormous amount of pressure to keep our grades up from everyone we knew, and that was only going to get harder to do once the baby comes. It made me want to scream! But instead, I just sat here, in our den, pretending everything was all right.

"You wanna play some Wii?" Jasper asked. I nodded my head.

"Sure. I don't have anything better to do at the moment," I said. So, we played the Wii for a while. We decided to go to a movie that evening, and Bella wanted to hold my hand during the screening, so I held her hand. However, I drew the limit when she wanted to make out during the movie. I was still upset about her accusing me of lying. When we got home, we went to bed. I went straight to sleep without a goodnight kiss.

The next morning, we woke up and got ready for church. We left in plenty of time to go to Sunday school, but when we got there, I looked around until I found Brother Tucker in the hall. I waited until he was finished talking to Mr. Ross, and then I asked him if I could talk to him at some point that day. He said he had a few minutes, and he escorted me to his office. He motioned for me to sit down, and I took a seat. He sat on the edge of his desk in front of me.

"How can I help you, Edward?" Brother Tucker asked me.

"Brother Tucker, I feel like I'm ready to scream. I've done something to betray Bella's trust in me, and now she doesn't trust me with anything," I said. "I'm afraid I've ruined everything between us forever, and I don't know how to fix it."

"I see. Don't you think Bella should be in on this discussion, Edward?" Brother Tucker asked.

"I don't know. I guess so. I just wanted to know what to do to get her to trust me again," I said.

"Do you think you should be telling your story without her knowledge? Should you be going behind her back?" Brother Tucker asked.

"No, you're right. I'm sorry I bothered you," I said getting up from the chair. "I shouldn't have come."

"No, Edward. I want to talk to both you and Bella. Why don't you go and get her?" Brother Tucker asked me.

"No, that's okay. It's my problem, not hers. I didn't mean to put you in a compromising situation," I said. I left his room and shut his door - pretty much in his face. I walked down the hall and into the men's room. I closed and locked the door. I leaned over the sink to wash my face with cool water. I couldn't help the tears escaping my eyes. My nose started running as well, and I wiped it with a tissue. I allowed myself to cry for several minutes, and then I got myself together. Instead of going to Sunday school, I made my way to the sanctuary where I just sat and thought about where I was in life.

All too soon, Sunday school was over, and I was joined by Bella and my parents. Bella wanted to know where I went, and I told her I wanted to talk to Brother Tucker. She didn't ask me why, and I didn't volunteer any information. That was the first thing that had gone right this weekend. That lasted until we got into the car to go home.

"Okay. Why did you wanna talk to Brother Tucker?" she asked.

"It's personal," I said.

"I thought you weren't gonna lie to me," she said.

"I'm not lying to you. It is personal. I just don't wanna tell you," I said.

"Well, I wanna know," she said.

"I'm sorry. I'm not gonna tell you," I said. "It's personal."

"Since when have you started keeping secrets from me?" she asked me.

"Since now. I'm just having some problems, and I wanted to talk to my preacher about them. That's none of your concern," I said.

"Edward, your problems are my concern," she said.

"No, Bella. This is my problem. I'm sorry," I said. "Just drop it."

By the time we got home, she wasn't talking to me, again. I didn't know what to do about it. I guessed I could have caved in and told her that I was looking for advice about her lack of faith in me, but I didn't want her to know I was upset about it. She had every right to not trust me, and I didn't want her to know I blamed her for it.

We did homework that night alone. It was just too easy to be apart these days.

The next week, Bella would ask me every morning if I was ready to tell her what I was talking to Brother Tucker about, and every morning I would tell her I wasn't. The rest of the day, it was like I didn't exist to her. The following week was the same. Jasper and Alice had no clue what had happened, and neither of us would tell them. It was like walking on eggshells around us. Neither of us was speaking to the other except through Jasper and Alice. If Bella wanted me to know something, she would tell Alice to tell Jasper to tell me what it was. I would generally not tell her anything, but if she had to know something, I would tell Jasper to tell Alice to tell her what she just had to know. It had gotten utterly ridiculous. We were still sleeping in the same bed because both of us were too stubborn to sleep on the couch. I felt as if I was right. What I chose to speak to my preacher about was between him and me. Period.

Things weren't better by the time for our next prenatal visit. Bella had told Alice there was no reason for me to accompany her on her visit, and I told Jasper to tell Bella there was no way in hell that I was missing it, especially since I was driving.

So we both went to the next pre-natal visit. Bella and I sat in the waiting room, still not speaking. When the nurse called Bella's name, I got up with her and followed her to the door. When we got there, Bella told the nurse she didn't want me to come back with her. The nurse looked at both of us, and then she looked at Bella.

"Bella, you've always let Edward come back with you. Are you sure you don't want him back with you this time?" she asked.

"Yes. I'm sure. We're fighting, and I don't want him with me, please," Bella said.

"Bella, don't do this," I said the first words to her in three weeks.

"I'm sorry, Edward. You can't come back. You need to wait out here," the nurse said.

I punched the wall and turned around, storming out of the office and to the car. I started the car and peeled out of the parking lot. It just so happened I'd pulled out in front of someone who hit me broadside, spinning my car into a parked car causing me to hit my head on the driver's side window shattering it and cutting my temple. When the car came to rest, I tried to open the door to get out, but it was stuck. I looked to the other side, but my car was resting against the parked car.

"Damn it!" I swore, hitting my hands against the steering wheel. I looked at the window frame, and realized it was bent too badly to allow me to get through.

"Are you all right?" the man who was driving the other car asked me as he came up to my car.

"Yes, Sir. I'm so sorry. I wasn't watching. I'll pay for everything," I said. "Are you all right?"

"Yes, son. I'm fine, but you're bleeding. Are you sure you're okay?" he asked.

I reached up and felt my face. I realized that there was blood dripping down my cheek and onto my shirt. I looked into the rear view mirror to see the damage and realized that I had a nice sized gash just above my left eyebrow. I released the seat belt and removed my shirt, wadding it up and holding it against the cut.

"Yes, Sir. I'm fine. Nothing a few stitches won't fix. The insurance should cover it as well," I said.

"So, you have insurance?" he asked.

"Yes, Sir. I have insurance," I said.

By then, the people from the OB/Gyn's office had come into the street. "We've called the police," a girl dressed in scrubs said. "Someone should be here soon. Here, let me get a dressing on that cut." She proceeded to take my shirt away from my face and apply pressure to my temple with several pieces of gauze which she taped into place.

"Great," I said.

"We have to involve the police, son," the man that hit me said.

"Yes, Sir. I know. The chief is just my father-in-law. He's gonna be thrilled."

"Can you get out, son?" the man asked.

"No, sir. I can't budge the door," I said. He tugged on the handle a couple of times, but he couldn't open the door either.

The sounds of sirens in the distance came closer and closer as the minutes passed. I just sat there in the glass from the window waiting. Eventually the chief's car pulled up. I knew that would be my luck. Charlie got out of the car and walked toward me.

"Edward, are you okay?" he asked.

"Yes, Sir. I'm okay. It's just a little cut. Looks worse than it is," I said.

"What happened? Where's Bella?" he asked.

"She's at her appointment. I pulled out in front of this man," I said.

"Why isn't Bella with you?" he asked.

"Because she wouldn't let me go back with her, and I left her. I was gonna send Alice to pick her up," I said. "We'll talk once you get me out of the car, okay?"

"Well, now you'll be here when she finishes, won't you?" Charlie asked.

"Yeah, I guess so," I said.

"I've gotta go talk to the other man now, Edward. I'll notify fire rescue that you need the Jaws of Life," Charlie said, and he walked off. More sirens sounded in the distance and soon the fire department arrived to get me out of the car. They put a blanket over me, and then they cut the door open. I stepped out of the car and looked at the damage. I knew it would be bad, but not this bad. I shook my head as Charlie came up to me.

"I'm not happy with you leaving Bella stranded at the doctor's office, Edward," he said.

"I can understand that," I said. "I'm angry at her, and I think that us being apart right now is a good thing."

"Well, I spoke to the gentleman, and he said you pulled out in front of him," Charlie said.

"I told you I did. It was my fault. I'm responsible for the accident," I said.

"How are you two gonna pay for this? Edward, I'm worried about you. I don't know what's going on, but you and Bella are gonna have another baby, and you're doing stupid things like this. What's gotten into you?" Charlie said.

"Hey, don't be too hard on the kid. Accidents happen," the newest victim of my transgressions walked up and said. "My son has been in several, and you just love them all the same and thank God they weren't hurt."

"Where do you want the car towed to, Edward?" Charlie asked.

"I don't know. Wherever you think is best," I said.

"Fine. Randy Herrington's it is, then," Charlie said, and he called for the tow truck.

Before the tow truck could get there, Bella came outside and ran up to me. "Are you okay?" she asked. I nodded. "What happened?"

"I pulled out in front of this man. It was my fault," I said.

"You were leaving me?" she asked.

"Yes. I was gonna call Alice to come get you," I said.

"Oh. I see," Bella said. Charlie came up to us then.

"Hi, baby. How was your appointment?" he asked.

"Wonderful. Everything is right on track. The baby is doing just fine," she said.

"It's good to hear that," I said, sarcastically.

"I'm glad you think so," she said.

"What's going on between you two?" Charlie asked.

"Nothing," she said.

"Nothing," I said at the same time.

"Funny, I don't believe you," he said. "Do you want me to take you to a rental car place or to the house?"

"Please, Daddy," Bella said. "Would you take us home?"

"Yeah, that would be great, Charlie. Thanks," I said.

By that time, both tow trucks had arrived, and the cars had been loaded. The other man had been given a copy of the accident report with my name on it, and he recognized my name from the news. He came over to congratulate me for the championship game, and I thanked him. I apologized again for the accident and told him that my insurance would take care of everything. He said it was okay, and I introduced him to Bella. He looked stunned that she was expecting because he now realized I was still in high school. He shook her hand and said she must be proud to have a husband as famous as I was. She just shrugged her shoulders.

When he walked away, she looked at me and said, "That must have been good for your ego."

"No, I actually don't like it when people, strangers, recognize me. It bothers me."

"Are you ready, guys? Things are cleared up here. Let's go," Charlie said. So, Bella got in the front seat, I got in the back seat, and he drove us home. I didn't say anything the whole trip home, flashbacks of my last ride in the back of his car foremost in my mind. When he pulled into our driveway, I got out of the back as quickly as humanly possible. He just laughed.  
>"Bad memories, Edward?" he asked.<p>

"Yeah, to be honest, there were," I said.

"Well, let's not have to put you there again…officially. What'd'ya say?" he grinned.

"Agreed," I said. I walked to the house, and opened the door. I went to the back of the house, and, pulling out my cell phone, I called my insurance agent. I explained about the accident and asked for him to okay a rental car until I could get a new one. He didn't have any problem with it, and he said he'd call the rental car agency right away. I then called Dad and told him about the accident. I didn't want him hearing about it from somebody else. He asked me if I was okay, and I told him about the cut and the pieces of glass. I asked him if he could drop by, stitch me up, and take me to the rental car agency on his way home from work. He agreed to, and when his shift was over, he came straight to the house. He insisted on giving me a complete exam before he would put in the stitches, which I passed, and then he put in thirteen sutures and took me to get the rental car.

At the rental agency, I was able to sign for the car, and I got a nice Volvo, a silver one. I drove it home, and Bella met me in the driveway with her hands on her hips. I knew I was in trouble, at least in her eyes.


	23. Chapter 23

Disclaimer – Stephenie Meyers owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.

A special thanks goes out to my beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 23

Gone Again

BPOV

I met Edward in the driveway as he pulled up in the rental car. He was going to explain why he tried to leave me at the doctor's office alone. With my hands on my hips, I watched as he got out of the car and tried to walk past me into the house. I grabbed his arm, and he turned towards me.

"Edward, why did you leave me?" I asked.

"Why didn't you let me come in with you?" he asked me.

"We were fighting," I said. "I was angry with you."

"The same," he said.

"You were really leaving me?" I asked. "For good?"

"I don't know. I wanted to get as far away from you as possible. I don't know where I was going. I still don't know if I'm leaving," he said.

"Do you even remember why we're not talking?" I asked.

"Yeah, I do. You quit talking to me when I wouldn't tell you why I wanted to talk to Brother Tucker. I don't know if I need to live with you if you can't give me my privacy, if you don't trust me. I don't know if I need to live with you if you aren't gonna include me in the baby's life. I think I might need to go again, Bella. I just don't know about us anymore."

"Why do you run when we have problems, Edward? I'd be willing to bet your dad doesn't run away when your parents have problems," I said.

"I'd be willing to bet Mom never kept Dad out of one of her prenatal visits," he said.

"I'm sorry. I was angry with you. I never should have done that. It gave the wrong message, especially after you hit the wall. I had to answer all sorts of questions about whether you were abusive. It was embarrassing. I should have just let you come with me," I said.

"I'm not going to hash this out in the front yard, Bella. I'm going inside," he said, wrenching his arm from my hand and walking around me to the front door. He walked inside, and I followed him in.

"Edward, please don't go. Give us another chance," I begged him, not thinking that it would help at all.

"I think I'm gonna go for a while. You placed the last straw on my back today. I'm sorry. I'll call Alice and see if she'll pick you up," he said.

"No, that's okay. I'll call her," I said as he walked back to the bedroom. I walked to the couch and took out my cell phone. I waited until Edward left, and then I dialed Alice's number.

"Hi, Alice. Can you pick me up for school tomorrow?"

"Yeah, why? What's wrong with Edward?"

"He left me. He's gone to a hotel again. I really screwed up this time," I said.

"What happened?" she asked.

"Well, you know we haven't talked since the weekend when I accused him of drinking. Well, when we went to the doctor's office today, I wouldn't let him come into the exam room with me. He got mad and got into a bad wreck. He probably totaled the car, and now he's gone," I said.

"Is he okay," she asked.

"Yeah, he's okay. I'm sure he'll be sore for a couple of days, and he has a pretty bad cut on his temple, but he's okay overall. Carlisle checked him out," I said.

"Was it his fault?" she asked.

"Yeah, it was. He pulled out in front of someone. They were great about it, though. They didn't threaten to sue us or anything," I said.

"I guess that's because they didn't think you have anything," she said.

"Yeah. Well, can you pick me up?" I asked.

"Of course. Do you want me to call him?" she asked.

"No, it's my fault. I should have let him in the exam room. I really pissed him off. I can't take that back," I said.

"No, you can't, but is that enough reason for him to leave you again? You can't work things out if you aren't together. Is he filing for divorce?" she asked.

"He didn't say he was, but he took two suitcases with him. I don't think it'll only be for five days this time," I said.

"Bella, I'm sorry for what's happened. I wish you could take it back," she said.

"Yeah, me too," I said. "Bye, Alice."

"Bye, Bella," she said.

I decided to do my homework for the night. There wasn't that much to do, and I finished it in no time. I changed into my pajamas and went to bed early. I had all the time in the world to think about all the things that were going wrong in our marriage, and there were plenty to think about.

I finally dozed off about three a.m., but I didn't rest well. Nightmares filled the rest of my night. I kept seeing the accident, only Edward wasn't all right. In my dream, he had a bad head injury. He was bleeding from his scalp, and he was knocked unconscious. They had to call an ambulance for him, and at the hospital he had to be transferred for brain surgery. He was in a coma for several weeks, and when he woke up, he didn't remember me. I woke up crying. I knew everything we were going through was my fault. I'd accused him of breaking his word to me, and the one thing he'd never done was lie to me. I knew that in the depths of my heart, but on the surface, I'd had doubts since I'd caught him cheating. The insecurities were so ingrained, I didn't know any other way to act. The truth be told, I was insecure about my marriage.

When I woke up for the day, I got ready for school. I didn't want to go, and I didn't want to see Edward. I didn't want to face him after yesterday, but Alice showed up right on time, and she made me go. When we pulled up in the parking lot, the rental car was parked in our parking place. He was here. I got out of Alice's car and walked to my locker. Edward wasn't anywhere to be seen. I walked into our first class, and he was already seated. I walked by him and sat in my seat. He didn't glance my way.

We were back where we were before. Not talking. Not looking at each other. I'd bet that he wasn't going to stand with us at breaks or sit with us at lunch. I was right. Edward was an absent member of our group. He again hung out with the football players. I was alone, though Alice and Jasper were with me. They tried to keep my spirits up, but they were unsuccessful.

One week turned into two, which turned into three, then four. Once again, it was time for another doctor's visit, and Edward still wasn't home. I was devastated by the fact that, not only were we not talking to each other, but we hadn't communicated at all in the past month. I was twenty-eight weeks pregnant by this time, and my next appointment was the next day. I wanted to ask Edward to go with me, but I didn't know how he'd react. I gathered my wits, and during morning break, I asked for divine help and walked up to Edward's new gang.

"Edward, can I speak with you?" I said, placing my hand on his arm. He turned and looked down his nose at me.

"I don't have anything to say to you," he said.

"Please, Edward. Just for a minute," I said.

"Come on Edward. Give her a chance," Thomas said. "She asked nicely."

Edward gave him a dirty look, a "don't butt in" look, but he stepped away from them and faced me. "You have a minute," he said to me.

"I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow. I wanted to invite you to go with me to the appointment," I said.

"You want me to go? I thought you didn't want me with you. You made that pretty clear on your last visit, Bella," he said.

"I told you I was wrong. I made a bad decision last month. This is your baby, too, and you deserve to be at the appointments," I said.

"I don't know, Bella. I'll think about it," he said. "I'll let you know tomorrow." He turned back to his group, dismissing me.

I walked back to Alice and Jasper, tears in my eyes.

"What happened?" Alice asked.

"He said he'd tell me tomorrow, that he'd think about it," I said.

"What the hell is his problem?" Alice asked.

"He's hurting just like you are, Bella. I know he's not happy," Jasper said.

"You could've fooled me. He doesn't even look at me at all. I don't think he loves me anymore. We've been apart for a month now, and there's nothing that makes me think we'll be getting back together anytime soon," I said.

"Don't worry, Bella. I'm sure he'll come around," Jasper said.

"I wish I could be sure," I said. "I feel so hopeless."

The next day, Edward met me at my locker before first period. "I decided I wanna go with you to your appointment. I still wanna be involved in my child's life, no matter what happens with us," he said. "I'll drive us."

"Edward, isn't there any way we can at least start talking again?" I asked. "I am so, so sorry for everything I did. I know you've never lied to me. Hell, even when it was the worst thing ever, you never lied."

"You finally figured that out, did you?" he asked.

"Yeah. I figured it out," I said. "Even then you didn't lie."

"Well, it's too late for that now," he said.

"No, it's not. I screwed up, but when you screwed up, I forgave you. And if I can remind you, you screwed up worse. I'm so sorry if your actions made me a little skittish about trusting you, Edward. I'm so sorry if your actions gave me reason to make me question your faithfulness," I said just a little too loudly. People in the hallway stopped to look at us. I had tears running down my face.

"Great, Bella. Just air our dirty laundry right here, in the hallway at school. Exactly where I want to talk to you about our problems," he said.

"You won't talk to me about our problems anywhere else," I said.

"Maybe I don't wanna talk to you. Maybe I'm tired of trying to talk to you," he said.

"Then file for a divorce. I'm tired of just hanging out, not knowing what we're doing," I said. "And don't worry about this afternoon. Alice will take me," I said. I ran away to the girls' bathroom. Alice followed me and took me into her arms. I cried onto her shoulder for several minutes until I could get myself under control.

"I'm sorry. I created a scene, didn't I?"

"It's okay. He deserved it," she said.

"No, he didn't deserve it. I love him, and he didn't deserve to be embarrassed," I said.

"You're too generous," she said. "I would have embarrassed him on purpose."

"You're not me. I love him more than life," I said.

"You're crazy," she said.

"Yes, I am," I said.

"Are you ever gonna tell me what he did that weekend?" she asked.

"I asked you not to bring up that weekend ever again," I said.

"You said he deserved for you not to trust him after he made you question his faithfulness. What did he do?" she asked.

"ALICE! That's our business," I said.

"Okay, okay. I give," she said.

"Let's get to class," I said. "We're already late." We left the bathroom, and to my surprise, Edward was waiting outside of the bathroom.

"Let's go somewhere and talk," he said, grabbing my arm and pulling me towards the door of the building. I jerked my arm away from him.

"I've gotta get to class," I said.

"No, we're gonna go talk," he said, grabbing my arm harder. He pulled me towards the door, and I reluctantly followed him. He dragged me to the new car and pushed me into the passenger seat.

"How do you like the new car?" I asked.

"Fine. We're not here to talk about the car. Why did you say all of that in front of all of those people?" he asked.

"I don't know. I was angry. I didn't mean to embarrass you. I'm sorry," I said.

"Do you want a divorce?" he whispered.

"No. Do you?" I asked.

"No," he said.

"I can't continue this way, Edward. I can't continue to live this way. Either we're together, or we're not. I love you more than life, but I won't continue to be married to you if you won't be my husband. I won't continue to live alone and raise our child alone…and be married to you. It will break my heart, but if you insist on living apart from me, you might as well talk to your Uncle George and file for divorce."

"I don't want that," he said.

"Then move back home," I said.

"I don't know. I can't live with someone who doesn't trust me. The one thing I've never done is lie to you. Even when it's been bad for me, I've never lied to you. The one thing I have is my word, and when you don't trust me and my word, then I feel as if I don't have a relationship with you anymore," he said.

"I told you I was wrong. It was a gut instinct that resulted from your betrayal. It was hard for me to trust you. You betrayed me in the worst way possible, Edward. You don't understand how badly that hurt me. You don't understand how much I wanted to just leave you standing there with your pants down and run away from you. But I didn't. I brought you with me. I gave you a second chance, and then that day it looked like you betrayed me again." The tears had started again. "Then you refused to talk to me. You wanted to talk to the preacher, but you wouldn't talk to me," I said.

"You didn't trust me," he started.

"You didn't give me a reason to trust you," I said, crying out loud now.

"I know, but I've never lied to you," he said.

"Edward, we're just going around and around. This isn't helping anything. Bottom line is that if you're gonna stay gone, just call your Uncle George," I said. I started to get out of the car, and he grabbed my arm to prevent me from getting out.

"Wait a minute, Bella. Do you expect me to just move back in? Don't you just think we should be talking first? Don't you think we should be able to be in the same room together for a little bit without biting off each other's head before I move back in?" he asked.

"I think you need to move back in. I'm tired of living alone. I think we can work on the rest of it when we're together. If it will make you feel better, you can move into one of the guest bedrooms," I said.

"If you're sure," he said.

"I'm sure," I said. "I want you back home."

"Let's just start with the doctor's appointment. How 'bout it?" he said.

"Okay. It's a start," I said.

That time when I tried to get out of the car, he didn't try to stop me. We went back inside the building and waited until the bell rang for the next period. We went to class and sat down next to each other. I looked at him, and he looked at me. I had a smile on my face, and he grinned back at me. I took notes and tried to ignore the fact he was watching me. He decided to stand with us at break. We didn't talk very much, but he was there, and then he sat with us at lunch. He and Jasper mainly talked about basketball.

When school was over, we walked to the car together. He drove us to the doctor's office, and it wasn't long before we were called back. The nurse looked at Edward when he followed me back to the exam room. He just took a seat by my head.

When the doctor came in, she examined me and told me that everything was looking good. We were right on track. She looked at Edward, and she asked us if we were all right.

"We're still having some problems," I said. "We're not perfect, but we're working on it."

"There isn't any violence in the relationship, is there?" Dr. Bush asked.

"No, Ma'am," I said. "Edward would never hurt me, not physically anyway."

"That's good to know," she said.

"Edward is my best friend. He would protect me with his life," I said.

"But you two are having problems?" she asked.

"It's personal," he said. "I, for one, would rather not talk about it."

"I see," she said.

"I agree," I said.

"You are good to go, then. I'll see you in another month," she said.

"Great," I said.

We left the office, and Edward took me home. "Would you like to come in?" I asked.

"No, not really. I don't think that would be a good idea," he said.

"But…we really need to talk, Edward," I said.

"I know, but I'm all talked out today. I think being accused of abusing you is the last straw for me today," he said.

"I defended your honor," I said.

"Yes, but if you hadn't kept me out last time, there wouldn't be any reason for her to question me, would there?" he said. "I think I just wanna go back to my room, get my homework done, and go to bed. I'm ready for today to be over."

"I guess so. I'm so sorry," I said.

"It doesn't matter. It's done," he said.

"Won't you forgive me?" I asked.

"Sure, I forgive you, but just like with my mistake, yours has consequences, too," he said.

"I understand," I said. I got out of the car and walked to the front door. I let myself in, and once I shut the door, he backed out of the driveway. I went to the bedroom and did my homework. I made a sandwich and then went to bed.

The next morning I got up. When I got to school, I searched out Edward and found him sitting in the classroom. When I sat down across from him, I leaned over to talk to him. "Good morning, Edward," I said.

"Morning, Bella," he said.

"Would you stop by the house after practice tonight?" I asked.

"I don't know. It depends on how today goes, I guess," he said.

I held my breath all day long hoping that nothing would ruin his day so that he would come over. I didn't know what I would do later that night, but I needed him around me, especially at this time in the pregnancy. We were past the point we'd made it with Victoria, and I was nervous. I didn't know what to do at this point. She was moving all over the place. We didn't have any baby furniture, no additional clothes, or anything else prepared for her. We needed to get going on the preparations for her arrival. I needed his help, and we needed to do this together.

When I got home, I got out some furniture flyers and some catalogues I'd gotten from various stores. I had my favorites, but I wanted Edward's opinion. I put them on the end table by the couch. Then I went and got out some pork chops to make for supper. When it was time to start cooking, I put on some vegetables and started the pork chops. Before they were done, my cell rang. It was Edward.

"Hello," I answered the phone.

"Hi, Bella. I don't think I'm gonna come over tonight. I'm just tired, and I wanna go back to my room and just crash," he said.

"But Edward, I've almost got supper finished. Are you sure you won't come over? It's pork chops," I said.

"That really sounds good, but I'm really tired. I didn't sleep very well last night. I had a lot to think about. I don't wanna be out late," he said, "and I just know if I go to your house that I'll be gone for several hours."

"My house. So…it's my house now?" I asked.

"No, that's not what I meant. I'm sorry, that's not what I meant," he said.

"Edward, please. Please come over," I begged. "Please."

"Fine. I'll be there in about five minutes," he said.

"Thanks," I said.

I finished preparing the meal and put it on the table. Five minutes later, I heard a knock on the door. I went to the door, and when I opened it, Edward was standing there.

"When did you start knocking on your own door?" I asked.

"When I moved out," he answered.

"You still live here," I said.

"No, Bella, I don't. I moved out. I live at the Holiday Inn," he said. I turned around and tears filled my eyes. I left him standing in the foyer and walked into the breakfast nook where I'd set the table. I took my seat, and Edward followed me in and sat down. He said grace, and we began eating. Edward didn't say anything else during supper, but once supper was over, he said, "Let me help you with the dishes."

"Thanks," I said.

"No problem," he said.

We cleaned up the kitchen, and then I asked him to go into the den with me. He followed me to the couch and sat down. "I don't wanna stay very long. I'm tired, and I have homework to do," he said.

"I know. I have homework, too, but I wanted to go over some things about the baby with you. I'm already further along than I was with Victoria, and we don't have anything for her yet. We don't have any furniture or any supplies or any basic clothes. I don't wanna buy anything else without your input. You should be a part of this," I said.

"Why? You didn't see the need to involve me in buying her first clothes," he said.

"You're jealous I bought those clothes with Alice?" I asked.

"No, not jealous. Hurt. I wanted to be with you when you bought her things. I thought you would've known that," he said.

"I'm sorry. You didn't wanna go shopping with us," I said.

"You didn't say you were shopping for our baby," he said.

"I didn't know I was. I just found those precious outfits and couldn't pass them up," I said. "I didn't mean to hurt your feelings."

"Well, you did," he said.

"Well, I'm asking you now. I wanna pick out a nursery set, and I want your input. I've got a favorite, but I don't wanna pick it out by myself. Here are some flyers and catalogues with baby furniture, and I wanted to look over it with you. Will you look at it with me?" I asked.

"Just get your favorite," he said.

"You may not like it," I said. "It's pretty girly."

"Well, we are having a girl," he said.

"We're most likely having a girl. Ultrasounds have been wrong," I said.

"Dad agreed it's a girl," he said.

"Well, at least look. You may like something else. Please," I begged.

"Okay. I'll take them back with me and look at them," he said. He got up from the couch with the brochures and walked to the front door. I followed him to the door, and grabbing his arm, I turned him around to face me.

"Edward, please look at me. What's keeping you from coming home? What's the biggest problem? What can I do to get you back home?" I asked.

"The fact you don't trust me, Bella. I can't live with someone who doesn't trust me. I know I did something to betray your trust. I realize this is my fault, and that's why I moved out, because this is my fault. Otherwise, I would have asked you to leave, but it's not your fault. It's mine."

"Edward, I've forgiven you for that. You weren't in your right mind. We've started over. That is behind us. We've moved past that, and I'm not holding it against you. I didn't ask you to move out because of that incident."

"But you don't trust me because of what I did. You can't help it. You may not consciously hold it against me, but subconsciously you do, Bella. I can't live with you when you don't trust me."

"I do trust you. I was wrong to accuse you. I'm sorry. Please forgive me and move back in. How am I gonna prove I trust you if you won't move back in?"

"I don't know, Bella. I don't know, but I do know I'm not ready to move back in, yet. I'm leaving now. Don't make this hard, or I won't come over anymore."

I let go of his arm, and he opened the door and walked outside. I walked him to the car, and he got in. I stood by the car while he drove away, tears running down my face. Before I could go back inside, my neighbor, Mrs. Garrett, walked up to me.

"Things not going any better between you two?" she asked me.

"No, not really," I said.

"When I saw the car in the driveway, I got my hopes up that he was back for good," she said.

"No, not yet," I said. "I'm working on it, though. Thanks for asking." I turned to walk back in the house.

"Bella, if you need anything, you know you can call me. Anytime," she said.

"Thanks," I said, "I'll remember." I walked back into the house, went to the bedroom, and did my homework. I cried myself to sleep. I was beginning to have no hope.


	24. Chapter 24

Disclaimer – Stephenie Meyers owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.

A special thanks goes out to my beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 24

Shopping

EPOV

Bella was pushing me to move back in, but I wasn't ready to do that yet. I also didn't want to divorce her. She meant the world to me, and I loved her more than life itself. I just didn't think I could live with her while she didn't trust me. I arrived back at the hotel and went straight to my room. If I'd ever wanted a drink, it was tonight. I wanted to get drunk and forget what it was like to be with Bella. I wanted to be so drunk it didn't hurt to think about her. But! But I promised myself I wouldn't ever drink again. If I ever screwed up again, I knew she wouldn't ever give me another chance. Hell, I might as well break my promise. I'm not home and not planning on going home anytime soon. I might as well give her a reason not to trust me.

What am I saying? I've already given her a reason to not trust me. The reason I wasn't home was all my fault. I couldn't sit here and blame her. I could go home anytime I was ready to. I thought back to the last time I moved out. I promised myself I'd never leave her again, yet here I was, and I'd been gone for over a month. What if she fell down? What if she got sick again? I certainly wasn't taking care of her. I needed to get back in that house. I needed to take care of my wife and my child. I was afraid to. That was the bottom line.

I picked up my cell phone and dialed Jasper's number. He answered on the second ring.

"Hi, Edward. What's up?"

"Jasper. I just wanted to talk. Are you busy?"

"Never too busy to talk to you. I'm with Alice. Let me step outside."

"Thanks, man."

"Okay, I'm alone. What's up?"

"I went over to Bella's tonight. I'm supposed to look at baby furniture and get back to her."

"And this is a problem, why?"

"Because I should be with her. I've left her alone too long."

"Then go home. She wants you home. What's the problem?"

"She doesn't trust me. She says she does, but she doesn't. She hasn't trusted me since that party when I screwed up."

"She has reason not to trust you, but you'll earn that back. That'll just take time."

"How can I live with someone who doesn't trust me?"

"Well, you live day to day. You don't do things that put your trust in question. You take care of her, and you show her by your actions she can trust you. It's as simple as that."

"Are you saying I should just give in, swallow my pride, and move back in with her?"

"That's exactly what I'm saying."

"I don't know if I can do that, Jasper. What if it doesn't work this time?"

"Then you won't work, and you might as well divorce her. You two aren't acting like a married couple right now, anyway. You're just growing further and further apart. Soon, your marriage won't be worth saving. Do you wanna be married to her? Do you wanna be a family with your daughter, or do you want visitation in a hotel once she is born?"

"I want my family."

"Then go get them."

"Thanks for the talk."

"Well, did you get anything from it?"

"Yeah. I'm at least gonna look at these baby furniture brochures. I'll be able to talk to Bella tomorrow about them. Maybe that will brighten her day tomorrow. Then maybe we can talk, and maybe we'll get somewhere."

"You need to go home, Edward."

"I know. I need to talk to Bella, first."

"You need to go home."

"I know. And hopefully I will get there soon. Thanks for the talk."

"You're welcome. Anytime."

I hung up the phone and took my shower. I worked on my homework, and then I got into bed. I picked up the brochures and the catalogues and started looking at the baby furniture. I quickly found one set I particularly liked. It was a soft oak color and was a feminine design. It looked really nice, and the crib was one of those that changed to a toddler bed and then could be turned into a double bed as the child grew up. It had a dresser with a changing table on top, and it had a chest of drawers as well. I marked the page and closed the brochure. I lay down in the bed and quickly fell asleep. Unfortunately, the sleep didn't last long. I had a nightmare that Bella had our daughter, but I wasn't allowed in the delivery room. I was only allowed to see her through the window. When they went home, Bella wouldn't let me see her, and I had to go to Uncle George to obtain visitation. I got every other weekend, and I had to pay spousal and child support. Bella had filed for divorce. I woke up in a cold sweat. I couldn't go back to sleep.

I swore if there was any chance I could get back home, I would work towards it happening in the next few days. I couldn't lose Bella and my baby. I just couldn't. What was I thinking? Was I crazy? I was still staying here because of my pride? What a fool! I picked the baby furniture information back up and looked through it again. I chose out a second and a third favorite. I wanted to have options for Bella to choose from, because I didn't want her to have to compromise her choices. Surely, one of the choices I'd made was one of her favorites.

It was only six a.m., but I couldn't go back to sleep. I looked again through the furniture and imagined my daughter lying in one of the baby beds. Then I got dressed and headed for school. I wanted to catch Bella before she went to class, so I waited at our lockers. My new gang wanted me to go talk to them, but I waved them off, telling them I was waiting for Bella. Thomas was excited about the fact I wanted to talk to her. He had become a much closer friend since I'd leant him the money to pay for his girlfriend's abortion.

"It's about time, Edward. You and Bella need to talk. Good for you," he said.

"Yeah, I know. I'm gonna try to do it right this time. It's time we worked things out," I told him.

"See ya later," he said, and I nodded at him. I waited for Bella. Soon she approached her locker. I looked at her, and she smiled at me.

"Hi, Bella. I looked at the furniture last night, and I found several I like. Do you want to look at them with me?"

"Sure. Come on. Let's go ahead and sit down in Calculus. We have time to look at them before class starts."

"Great. I can't wait to show you what I found. I got so excited looking at them."

We went to sit down in our desks, and I pulled out the brochures. I turned to my favorite. "This one is my favorite. I like the fact it would grow with her. It is also feminine. Do you like it?"

"Yes. It was my second favorite. This one is my favorite," she said taking another brochure out and turning to my third favorite.

"That one is my third choice. I think it is nice. We can get it if you want it."

"No, I like the one that you picked out. It is really pretty, and you're right. It will grow with her, and that's nice."

"Well, we can afford to buy her other sets for when she grows. We can buy her your favorite. I like it, too."

"Well, your favorite was my second favorite, and my favorite was your third favorite, so it makes sense to buy your favorite. I like it a lot. Let's get your favorite. Or we could ask Alice and Jasper to break the tie…or your parents."

"No, we should decide. Let's keep this decision between us. We can get my favorite. I really do like the fact it will grow with her. If you're sure you don't mind."

"I don't mind. I think that's a great idea. When do you wanna go get it? I think we need to get the nursery set up soon. We could have her any day now."

"Why don't we go this weekend?"

"You'll go with me?"

"Of course. I wouldn't miss it for the world."

"Edward, Bella, would you like to share your conversation with the rest of the class?" Mrs. Ross asked.

"No Ma'am," I said. "I'm sorry. I didn't hear the bell ring."

"Well, I'll see you both after class," she said.

"Yes, Ma'am," I said.

When class was over, Bella and I went to Mrs. Ross's desk. "I'm sorry, Mrs. Ross. I really didn't hear the bell ring."

"What were you two talking so intently over?" Mrs. Ross asked.

"We were picking out baby furniture," Bella said.

"I see. Did you find something you liked?" Mrs. Ross asked.

"Yes, Ma'am. We did," I said.

"It's good to see you two speaking," Mrs. Ross said.

"Yes, Ma'am," Bella said. "It's good to be speaking again."

"Are you back home, Edward?" Mrs. Ross asked.

"No, Ma'am. Not yet. We're working on it, though," I said.

"I don't understand. You two are so much in love. I just don't understand what could have happened between the two of you to have put you out of the house for so long, Edward. This disappoints me. I've seen other teenagers get into trouble during my years of teaching, but I really thought that the two of you would make it," Mrs. Ross said.

"We're gonna make it. Nothing is gonna keep me from Bella and my daughter," I said.

"That's good to hear," Bella said.

"Get to class. Here is an excuse for the both of you, just in case you're late," Mrs. Ross said.

"Thanks," I said. I took Bella's hand, and we walked out of the room. We walked to our next class and turned in our excuse to Mrs. Briggs. She told us to sit down, and she went ahead with her lecture.

At morning break, we showed Alice and Jasper which furniture set we picked out, and they said they liked it. Then we talked about going to Seattle to buy the set. We made a date for Saturday.

We got up early on Saturday, and I drove us to Seattle. We went to the store which had the baby set on sale, and we bought the entire set. We arranged to have the set delivered the next weekend. Then we went to several baby boutiques. We quickly agreed on a bedding set for the crib. We would be decorating her room in Baby Disney characters. We then bought sheet sets, towel sets, some onsies, and other clothes for her. We spent over five hundred dollars in clothes alone, and we were just getting started. I was happy to be sharing the day with Bella.

While we drove home, we talked about our marriage. We talked about the things keeping us apart ― such as my being hurt by the fact she didn't trust me. She again apologized for it, and she said she was doing her best to trust me. I told her I understood, and I was ready to try to come back home, if she would have me.

"Of course I'll have you," she said.

"You do understand this is only a trial run?"

"Yes, I do. But after all, a trial run is better than you not being home at all."

"I agree. Let me drop you and the packages off at the house, and I'll go and pack."

"Will you be back tonight?"

"Sure. Tonight is as good as any." So after I dropped off Bella and the packages, I went back to the hotel and packed my suitcases. I checked out of my room, and I left the hotel for home.


	25. Chapter 25

Disclaimer – Stephenie Meyers owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.

A special thanks goes out to my beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 25

Meagan Elizabeth

BPOV

The people from the furniture store delivered the baby furniture the next weekend…right on schedule. Edward and I had been getting along well during the week he'd been home. We hadn't argued all week, and we were on cloud nine when the furniture arrived. We immediately started setting it up in the baby's room, putting each piece in its place. It was actually fun, and we laughed and kidded around as we set up each piece.

I had washed the bedding and her clothes, so we playfully argued as we found places to put up each type of clothing. Edward made her bed for the first time, because I couldn't reach the other side of it to tuck in the sheets. He really got a kick out of that little fact. He swore he wasn't calling me fat, but I didn't see it that way, and he got a knock in the back of the head for his mistake. He should've known better than to make fun of a pregnant me. I may not get over that so easily.

When the room was complete, we sat down in the den and watched a movie together. It meant so much to me that we were doing things together, that when he changed from movie mode to make out mode, I didn't stop him. In fact, I encouraged him. When he lay me down on the couch and started roaming with his hands, I not only encouraged him, I reciprocated. By the time the movie was over, we were nearly naked and ready to go to the bedroom. I stood up, and, grabbing his hand, I led him to our bed.

"I love you," I said.

"I love you, too," he said between kisses.

"Make love to me," I whispered, and he complied without hesitation. It had been so long since we had been together, that positioning was a bit problematic, but we managed all right. Afterwards, we snuggled with each other, and I fell asleep on my Edward's chest.

The next morning when I got up to go to church, my back was aching. I didn't think it was anything to be concerned about, figuring I'd slept wrong. We got dressed, and by the time we'd finished breakfast, even Edward could tell I was hurting. He rubbed my lower back, and it felt better. He asked me if I wanted to stay home, but I said I wanted to go to church. I wanted to let people see we were back together. I was so happy to be a couple again. So, we went to church.

During Sunday school, we sat in our classroom with the high schoolers, and Edward rubbed my back. When class was over, our teacher, Mrs. Buchanan, asked me if I was feeling all right. I told her my back was hurting ― that I slept wrong last night. She asked me if I was sure, and I told her I was pretty sure, and then we went to the sanctuary where Carlisle and Esme were sitting.

Edward again rubbed my back after we sat down, and Carlisle asked me if I was okay. I told him I thought I'd just slept wrong, and he asked me about my backache.

"I'm hurting in my lower back. It's just a steady aching," I said. "It's nothing."

"Well, I want to know if it continues," Carlisle said.

"Yes, Sir," I said.

When we went home, we ate a simple lunch, and I laid down for a little while, thinking my backache would feel better after lying down. Unfortunately, it only got worse, which only worried Edward more.

"I think we need to call Dad and ask him what we need to do," he said.

"It's just a backache, Edward. I'm sure it's just the way I slept last night," I told him. "Pregnant women have backaches."

"You would make me call him if it were me," he said.

"You would never be pregnant," I said.

"Don't be a smart ass. When I'm hurt or sick, you make me call. Payback is hell, Bella."

"Fine, call him. You'll see. It's just a backache."

"Fine." He picked up his cell phone and dialed Carlisle's number. "Hi, Dad. Bella's backache is worse. Is this anything we need to worry about?"

He listened to his dad talk for several minutes, and then he hung up the phone. "Get up. We're taking you to the emergency room."

"Why?" I asked.

"Well, Dad said you could be in early labor. We need to get you checked out. He's gonna meet us there."

"He's not gonna check, right?"

"No, I don't think so. I think he just wants to be there to support us."

"Okay, I'll go. Anything to protect our daughter." I got up and followed Edward to the car. He drove us to the emergency room. When we got there, I checked in telling them I was having lower back pain, and Carlisle wanted me to come in to rule out pre-term labor. They weren't busy, and they got me into a room right away. The nurse told me to undress all the way and to put on a gown. I did as I was told and had a seat on the table in the room. It was only a couple of minutes before the doctor came in to see me.

"Well, Mrs. Cullen, I hear you've had a backache. How long have you been hurting?"

"Since I woke up this morning."

"And where are you hurting?"

I pointed to my lower back.

"Are you having any abdominal pain at all?" the doctor asked.

"No, Sir."

"Have you had any leaking?"

"No, Sir."

"Well, why do you think that you may be in labor?"

"Dad said so," Edward said. "He told us to come in and get her checked. He's been worried about her since this morning. He said she looked a little swollen at church this morning."

"I see. And who is your father?"

"Dr. Carlisle Cullen. He usually works the ER. You're moonlighting here, aren't you?"

"Yes, this is my first time at this ER," the doctor said.

"I knew I didn't recognize you," Edward said.

"Well, it's nice to meet you," the doctor said.

"You, too," Edward said. "Now, back to Bella. She is a little swollen in the legs, and her face is a little swollen."

"I'm not that swollen," I said. "You're not being nice, Edward."

"Well, you're blood pressure is up. I want you to get me a urine sample. Can you do that?"

"I'm pregnant. I can always pee."

"You're seventeen," he asked.

"Yeah," I said.

"And this is your first pregnancy?" he asked.

"No, my second," I said.

"And your first pregnancy was full term?"

"No, pre-term," I said.

"Oh, how many weeks?"

"Twenty-six."

"May I ask what happened? Why did you have a twenty-six week delivery?"

"I had an abruption secondary to a fall. She was a stillborn."

"I'm so sorry."

"It's okay. It was almost two years ago, now."

"Okay, go and get me that urine."

I left the room and got the urine sample. I brought it back into the room, and the nurse came back to put the baby monitors on me. She explained one was to monitor the heartbeats, and the other one was to monitor me for contractions. As she was getting the monitors hooked up, Carlisle came into the room.

"How are you doing, Bella?" he asked.

"So far, so good," I said. "The doctor is new and didn't know who we were, so he asked a lot of questions."

"Well, that sometimes happens when we have the young docs come in to work overnight."

"I understand. It was just strange having to talk about Victoria again."

"I can see that," Carlisle said.

Carlisle walked over to the baby monitor and looked at the sheets that were printing out. "You're having contractions, Bella. They're not very strong, but you are contracting."

"Oh my God! Is the baby in danger?" Edward asked. "We're only thirty weeks."

"Thirty weeks is still seven weeks early, but contractions don't necessarily mean labor. You don't necessarily have to be dilating your cervix. Has he checked you, yet?"

"No, not yet," I said.

Someone came into the room with blood work equipment. "Hi, I'm MaryAnne. I need to draw some blood from you," she said. I held out my right arm, and she drew my blood. Before she was finished, the doctor came into the room.

"Hi, you must be Dr. Purvix. I'm Carlisle Cullen. This is my son and daughter-in-law."

"It's nice to meet you, Dr. Cullen. Call me Mike."

"Mike, how did her urine look? Any protein?"

"Yes, Sir. She has three to four plus protein, and her blood pressure is up. I'm gonna start an IV and start some magnesium."

"Without her LFT's. How high is her BP?"

"One forty over ninety-seven."

"Oh. Okay. Have you notified Dr. Bush?"

"Not yet. I was gonna check her strips and go from there."

"She's contracting. Low volume, but every six to eight minutes."

"Dad, English please," Edward asked.

"Sorry, Son. Bella is most likely suffering from something called pre-eclampsia. That is something that happens to young mothers. It is dangerous for both her and the baby. The only treatment is to deliver the baby, and she isn't ready to be delivered. She's pre-mature. What we're talking about is starting a medication to try to prevent Bella from having a seizure which can happen to women who have pre-eclampsia. We're not certain, yet, though. Not all of the lab work is back."

"I need to check your cervix, Mrs. Cullen. I need to see if you are dilating," Dr. Purvix said.

"I'm going to step outside and give you some privacy," Carlisle said. He walked outside into the hallway. Dr. Purvix stepped into the hallway and called for a nurse to come into the room with him. When she came in, she helped me into the stirrups and placed a sheet over me. Dr. Purvix came back into the room, and to my embarrassment, he checked my cervix to see if I was dilated. After he was finished, the nurse stepped into the hallway to get Carlisle, and he stepped back into the room.

"Mrs. Cullen, I'm afraid I have to tell you that you are starting to dilate. You are already to fingertip. You are in labor. I'm going to get you started on some fluids and see if that will help to stop the contractions. I'm also going to get in touch with your OB. You said that he is Dr. Bush?"

"She," I said.

"Excuse me?" Dr. Purvix asked.

"She. She is Dr. Bush," I said.

"I see," Dr. Purvix said. "I'm sorry. I didn't know. I'm going to call her right now."

"Okay," I said, and he walked out of the room.

"Carlisle, I'm scared," I said.

"I am, too," he said, "but Dr. Bush is a great doctor, and she'll take good care of you. Just lay back and rest."

Edward came to my side and took my hand. He leaned over me and kissed me. "I'm so sorry."

"Why are you sorry?"

"Because of last night. We shouldn't have made love last night. I knew it. This is my fault."

"No, Edward. This isn't your fault. It just happened."

"Bella is right, Edward. It isn't anyone's fault," Carlisle said. "This just happens to young mothers. It could have happened any time. It's just coincidental that you two made love last night."

"You're not just sayin' that, are you?" Edward asked.

"Of course not," Carlisle said. "I wouldn't sugar coat it."

"Thanks, Dad," Edward said.

Dr. Purvix came back into the room. "I've spoken with Dr. Bush. She was very nice. She agreed with the Magnesium Sulfate, and she's coming in to see you, Mrs. Cullen."

"Great! She's a wonderful doctor. She'll take good care of you, Bella," Edward said.

"I'm going to get you admitted to labor and delivery right now. Dr. Cullen, if you want to go over my orders, I'd appreciate it," Dr. Purvix said.

"I'd be happy to, Mike. Let's go look at them," Carlisle said.

They both walked out of the room, and I looked at Edward. "I'm scared. What if we have to deliver her early? What if she doesn't do well?"

"I know, Bella. I know. I'm scared, too, but Dr. Bush will be here soon, and she'll do everything that she needs to do to protect both you and the baby," he said. He leaned over and kissed me on the lips. I kissed him back with more passion than I should of in the hospital room. Luckily, nobody walked in on us. Maybe our luck was changing for the better. "You know, we haven't even discussed names for her."

"I haven't even thought of any names. I've been too distracted by our fighting to worry about baby names," I said.

"Me, too, but the chance she'll need to be delivered is real, at least according to Dad, so we'd better begin thinking of names pretty soon."

"Yeah, all right. What about Meagan? I've always liked that name."

"It's okay. I like it. What about Elizabeth for a middle name?"

"I think that Meagan Elizabeth sounds like a great name."

"It is pretty. I like it, but what about everybody else?"

"She's our daughter. We have to like it, not everybody else, Bella."

"Okay. Megan Elizabeth it is. Anything else?"  
>"Nope. Now that we've named her, she's ready."<p>

"But she's not ready. She's at least seven weeks early. You heard your dad. She's not ready to be born, yet."

"Maybe the rest of the labwork will be better."

"We can only pray it will be."

Dr. Purvix and Carlisle walked into the room interrupting our conversation. Carlisle walked up to me and said the liver function testing and the other testing they did weren't as bad as they thought they were going to be, so they were going to put me on bedrest for the time being. The nurses had the orders and were about to move me to my room.

Once they got me settled, I asked Edward for my cell phone. I called Alice and told her what was happening. She wanted to come to the hospital, and I asked her to stop by the house and pick up our bookbags and Edward a change of clothes for school tomorrow. She agreed to do that for us, and she arrived about an hour later. We both thanked her, and she sat down, making sure not to bother me. Edward and I started our homework, and Carlisle came into the room.

"What do you think you're doing, Bella?" he asked.

"My homework," I said.

"That's not resting," he said.

"I have to get my homework done so Edward can take it in tomorrow," I said.

"You have to rest. Anything that is stimulating is bad for you right now. You are still contracting, and your blood pressure is still up. Do you have a headache or a stomachache?"

"My head hurts a little, but it's nothing bad."

"Then absolutely no homework. Put it up. Now. Edward, she's to have nothing but bedrest. I thought I made that clear."

"We thought bedrest meant she couldn't get out of bed. I haven't let her get out of bed, even to go to the bathroom. I've made her use the bedpan." Edward said.

"No, when I said 'bedrest,' I meant 'do nothing.'"

"Okay, I get it. Give me your books, Bella," Edward said.

"I need to get this homework that's due tomorrow done. Just that much," I said.

"NO! Bella, you'll be absent tomorrow. You don't have to turn in your homework," Carlisle said.

"Come on, Bella. This is for our daughter," Edward said.

"All right. Here you are," I said, giving Edward my books. I lay down in the bed curling up into a little ball facing Edward and Alice. "I feel stupid just lying here."

"It's important for your health and the baby's health, Bella," Carlisle said.

"I said, 'all right.'"

"Carlisle is right, Bella. No activities. I'm gonna check your cervix now, okay?" Dr. Bush said, coming into the room. I nodded, and Alice got up to leave the room behind Carlisle. Edward came to sit next to my head which I'd lowered after I gave him my books.

"Okay, you're still just fingertip. You're not progressing. That's good," Dr. Bush said as she pulled off her gloves and flung them into the trash can. She went to the door and told the others they could come back in. They followed her back in, and she repeated to them I hadn't progressed. "Bella, this condition is serious. Your blood pressure is still up, and your urine has protein in it. I'm going to give you some steroids to help mature the baby's lungs in case we have to deliver her in the next couple of days."

"The next couple of days? She's too early. We can't have her this early," I said.

"That's why it's so important that you're on complete bedrest. That's the only thing that will possibly prolong your pregnancy," Dr. Bush said. "Otherwise, get ready for me to go ahead and induce your labor. Your life is in danger, Bella, and I'll deliver this baby in order to save your life."

"It's that serious?" Edward asked, his eyes and mouth wide opened. "Don't worry, Dr. Bush. She'll be at complete bedrest. I didn't understand the risk to Bella or the baby. Bella won't lift her head. I'll see to it."

"Edward, I have to move. I can't lie perfectly still. I'll go crazy," I said.

"I'll hold you, Bella. I'll hold you in my arms, and we'll talk. I'll keep you entertained. You won't know you're on bedrest."

"You have to go to school and do your homework. Otherwise we'll fall way behind."

"You are my first priority, Bella. I love you. I'll do whatever it takes to take care of you."

"You need to go to school, Edward," Carlisle said. "Your education is too important. You have to bring Bella back the information."

"If you two aren't gonna let her study, what is the point of bringing her back the information?" he asked.

"I didn't say she wouldn't be able to work on it indefinitely. Just not right now when her blood pressure is up and while she has protein in her urine. It is possible in a few days she will be able to work on it. Only time will tell, Edward. I agree with your Dad and Bella. You should go to school. The nurses will watch after Bella while you are gone," Dr. Bush said.

"Quit ganging up on me. Bella is my wife, and I'll make the decision."

"That's right. I'm your wife, and I'm telling you to go to school. Your being valedictorian is too important for you to lose. Please Edward. For me."

"What about you being valedictorian? I don't want an unfair advantage over you. That's not fair."

"That's just not gonna happen, Edward. That's not gonna be possible for me, what with this illness and with the baby coming, but there's no reason why you still can't be. You need to at least try for it. If I can't be, I want you to be."

Dr. Bush, Carlisle, and I won. Edward went to school the next morning.


	26. Chapter 26

Disclaimer – Stephenie Meyers owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.

A special thanks goes out to my beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 26

Bigger By One

EPOV

I caved in. Bella wanted me to come to school, so I did. I worried about her all day, and I was barely able to concentrate during school. When basketball practice was over, I showered and went by the house to get some changes of clothes for me and some nightgowns for Bella. I knew that she would be more comfortable in her own gowns. By the time I made it to the hospital, it was dark. Bella was asleep in the bed, so I sat down in the reclining chair and did some of my homework.

When they came in at shift change to do her vitals, I asked them how she was doing. They said her blood pressure had remained elevated all day, despite the bedrest. She still had protein in her urine, and they were about to give her a second dose of steroids to try to mature the baby's lungs. When the nurse left the room, I went to Bella's side, crawled into the bed beside her, and took her into my arms.

"How was your day?" I asked her.

"Boring. Yours?"

"I missed you."

"I missed you, too."

"You know, Bella, going to school isn't doing me much good. I can't concentrate without you there. My mind just isn't there, and my heart isn't in it."

"Well, you need to be there. Your grades depend on it. You know that."

"I don't care about grades right now. My family is in trouble, and my place is here with you."

"There's nothing you can do here. It would be different if we were out of high school, but we're not. You have that responsibility, too."

"What responsibility? What could be more important than my family?"

"It would be different if you could be doing something for me, but there's nothing you can do. You would be wasting time here. You're only a phone call away if I need you."

"How is being here with my wife, who is sick, a waste of time? Sitting in a classroom and being distracted is a waste of time."

"Edward, don't argue with me. You're just getting my blood pressure up more. You need to go to school, at least for the classes where they give notes. You know your notes are the only ones I trust besides my own. It's been that way for years, and I'm not changing now. Not when it counts the most."

"Okay, okay, whatever." I leaned over her and planted a kiss right on her lips. It was useless to argue with my Bella. I could never win. We snuggled back down into the bed. I took her into my arms and held her close. I still felt responsible for what had happened, even though Dad had said I hadn't caused her condition. I knew making love could help labor progress, so it was possible I was responsible. I nuzzled her hair, loving the smell of her shampoo. It was a smell I just identified as Bella.

I couldn't believe we were in this situation. Bella's life was in danger, and our daughter was at risk of being born pre-maturely. This had to be doing wonders for Bella's self-esteem. She was so worried about being able to carry a baby to term, especially after miscarrying this baby's twin, and now, we were in danger of having this baby pre-maturely. I was afraid she was going to slip back into the funk she was in after the miscarriage.

Hopefully not. She hadn't given me a reason to think she was going to, yet, and I thought she would if she started feeling as badly as she did then as she'd mentioned it to me before. I was an ass about it, but I repented. I realized what it meant to lose that baby, late, but better than never. So, I think she would let me know if she was down about the pre-term labor and the pre-eclampsia.

I just held her. Tight. I kept her close to me while she slept. I dozed off and on, but I pressed her head to my chest, and she seemed to sleep comfortably. The nurses came in a couple of times to change the paper in the monitor, and they would smile at me as we lay there. When it came time to wake her to get her vital signs the next morning, I got out of bed and sat in the reclining chair to finish my homework. Bella argued with me that I should have finished with it the night before, but I told her I did what I needed to do then. I asked the nurse when she came in about the contractions, and she said they had gotten stronger during the night.

It was then I made the decision that I was waiting on Dr. Bush to make her rounds before I left for school. Bella didn't agree with my decision, but my mind was made up. Usually she made her rounds pretty early, so I wouldn't miss much school, if any. I sat back down in the recliner and waited. Dr. Bush came in right at eight o'clock. She examined Bella, again checking her for how dilated she was, and unfortunately, she had progressed to one centimeter dilated overnight. Her labor was progressing. She checked her reflexes, and they were still good, so she increased the magnesium sulfate hoping it would stop the labor. I asked about Bella's labwork and blood pressure, and Dr. Bush told me her blood pressure was down, and her bloodwork was much closer to normal. Her urine had almost no protein in it, and the swelling was going down. At least the pre-eclampsia had improved. She was still going to give Bella another dose of steroids just in case we couldn't stop the labor, but it looked like we weren't going to have to deliver Meagan early because of the pre-eclampsia.

I looked at Bella and said, "Honey, I don't know about going to school today. What if your labor progresses instead of lets up?"  
>"Well, I'll give you a phone call. Just keep your phone on vibrate instead of turning it off. I'll text you if I need you, okay?" she said.<p>

"She's not really in labor, yet. She has to get to four centimeters before she is in active labor, Edward. That could take weeks or it could happen today. You can't miss school based on what happened overnight," Dr. Bush said.

"Okay. Promise me you'll text me if anything changes. And I do mean anything," I said.

"Promise," Bella said. I nodded and leaned over her to give her a kiss. Then I stood up and grabbed my bookbag. "I'll see you after basketball practice." She nodded her head, and after another kiss, I left the room and headed to school.

I arrived late for Mrs. Sims's room, and I walked in and took my seat.

"Edward, stay after, please," Mrs. Sims said. I nodded, and took out my book and notebook. I caught up with the class in no time, and started my homework. When the bell rang, I put up my stuff and went to Mrs. Sims's desk. "Why were you late?"

"I was waiting for the doctor to make her rounds. Bella is still dilating, and her contractions are stronger. They can't get them stopped right now, but her pre-eclampsia is under better control," I said. "I wanted to make sure it was all right for me to leave her before I left."

"I guess her doctor told you to come on in," Mrs. Sims said.

"Yes, Ma'am. They told me to keep my phone on vibrate just in case," I said.

"Fair enough. Go on to class," Mrs. Sims said.

I nodded and headed for my next class. I didn't hear from Bella all day. As soon as basketball practice was over, I went back to the hospital. I went straight to Bella's room, and she was sitting up in bed, eating. She sent me to the cafeteria to get something to eat, and as soon as I got my tray, I went back to her room. We ate together, and then I sat down to do my homework at her insistence. They still weren't letting her do anything at all.

As soon as I finished my homework, I lay down in the bed next to her and took her back into my arms. We lay that way for the rest of the night. She had a rough time falling asleep, so we talked about our baby. We talked about how pretty we knew that she would be, but we argued about why. She said that she would be pretty because she would look like me, but I said she would be pretty because she would look like her mother. We laughed and joked around, and Bella finally fell asleep about two o'clock that morning. I dozed off a little while after she did.

About three hours later, Dr. Bush came into the room and woke both of us up. "Good morning, Bella, Edward. How did you sleep last night?" she asked.

"Not too well. I couldn't sleep. I was hurting last night," Bella said. "If it wasn't for Edward, I wouldn't have slept at all," Bella said.

"You didn't tell the nurses you were hurting?" Dr. Bush asked.

"No, I figured they could see the monitors. They could tell if the contractions were getting stronger or not," Bella said.

"Well, they were," Dr. Bush said. "I don't like the fact you were feeling them again."

"I'm sorry," Bella said.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I asked.

"I didn't wanna worry you," Bella said.

"I could've rubbed your back," I said.

"It wasn't my back that was hurting."

"You were having real contractions, and you didn't tell me?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"Bella. You promised to tell me everything."

"Well, let me check you," Dr. Bush said.

"Okay, I'm getting up," I said.

I got out of the bed, and Dr. Bush sat down on the other side. She pulled back the covers and checked Bella to see if she had dilated any more, and sure enough, Bella had dilated to four centimeters.

"Well, Bella. We're gonna have a baby today. You're in active labor," Dr. Bush said. "I'm going to add some Pitocin to get the contractions into a better pattern."

"Our daughter's birthday. I need to call Mom and Dad. And we need to call your dad, Bella. I'm so excited. I can't believe the day is finally here," I said.

"Don't forget Alice and Jasper. They'd kill us if we forgot them," Bella said. "How long do you expect it to take?"

"There's no telling. It could take sixteen hours, or it could take four hours. It all depends on your body, Bella. Now, I'm going to go write the orders to get you started," Dr. Bush said.

"All right. Edward, if you'd make the phone calls, please," Bella said.

"Sure thing," I said, and I started with Mom and Dad who were excited but worried about the baby being early. Both said they'd be over soon. Then I called Charlie. He said he'd make arrangements and be over as soon as possible. Then, I called Alice. She was already awake, and she squealed loud enough to wake the rest of the house. I had to speak to Uncle George when Alice threw her phone at him. He offered me congratulations, and gave the phone back to Alice with permission to miss school. She said she'd be right over. I told her I'd call Jasper and tell him, and I did. I woke him up, but he didn't mind when I gave him the news. He was also given permission to skip school and come to be with us. Alice, who doesn't listen well, beeped in on our conversation, so I let him go to make arrangements for Alice to pick him up. Then finally, I went back to Bella.

"I'm scared, Edward," she said.

"I know. I'm scared for you," I told her. "I don't want you to hurt."

"I don't want any pain meds," she told me. "I don't want anything that will affect the baby."

"I don't think epidurals affect the baby at all," I said.

"I don't know, Edward. That seems awful selfish to me," she said.

"Not to me. You're gonna have a baby, and that's really painful. I want you to get an epidural, Bella. I don't want you in pain," I said. "Please."

"I'll think about it, but if it has any affect on the baby, I don't want it at all."

"I understand," I said.

The nurse came in to start the Pitocin, and I asked her about the epidural. She said it wouldn't affect the baby. It would just keep Bella from having pain, so I requested Bella have one as soon as it was medically all right for her to do so. The nurse said that she'd inform Dr. Bush.

By the time everyone had arrived, Bella was starting to really feel the contractions. I had laid back down with her, and I could feel several of them myself. It felt as if her stomach was getting hard, then relaxing. It was the weirdest feeling. We hadn't been through our natural childbirth classes, yet, so Mom was coaching Bella through her breathing, and Bella was doing fine.

About twenty minutes later, an anesthesiologist came to Bella's room. He asked us all to leave because he was going to start her epidural. I asked if I could stay to hold her hand, and the nurse said everyone had to leave. I didn't want to go, but I left with the rest of the family. We walked down the hall to the waiting room and took a seat. The others tried to reassure me Bella would be fine during the procedure, but I was a nervous wreck anyway. I paced up and down the room. Charlie watched me as I walked back and forth. Finally, he just had to speak up.

"Edward, are you back for good this time, or is your presence temporary, again?" he asked.

"I'm back for good, I hope," I said. "Megan is coming today, and assuming she does well, we'll be taking her home in a couple of days."

"That doesn't mean you'll stick around. You've been gone more than you've been home lately. Bella doesn't know she can count on you to be there for her or the baby," Charlie said.

"I'm planning on being there, assuming nothing else goes wrong between Bella and me," I said.

"So you can't guarantee me you'll be there for my daughter," Charlie said.

"I'm gonna be there," I said.

"Charlie, there isn't any reason to assume there are going to be any more problems between the two of them. Let's give them the benefit of the doubt," Dad said.

"I can't do that. They're teenagers about to bring a baby home, and Edward has proven twice in the past that when there's trouble between them, he runs away leaving Bella to manage things alone. I don't trust him to help her with this baby. I don't trust him as far as I can throw him," Charlie said. "He's lost all of the respect I've had in him."

"Charlie, you don't know what's going on between Bella and me. Maybe if you did, you'd have agreed with me for leaving when I did. I don't know. But bottom line is I did what I thought was best at the time. I'm back now, and I don't plan to leave Bella with my daughter alone," I said.

Just then, the nurse came to get us saying the epidural was finished. I bolted back to Bella's room. I took her into my arms and hugged her. She seemed to be much more comfortable. There was a small tube sticking out of her back which was held in place by medical tape. She was lying on her side, breathing more easily with her eyes closed. I kissed her behind her ear, and she smiled at me.

"How are you feeling, sweetheart?" I asked.

"Better. I'm not feeling the contractions anymore," she said.

I tucked in behind her and held her in my arms while we listened to Meagan's heartbeats. About thirty minutes later, one of the nurses came in to check Bella's progress. I got up from the bed and stood by her head while everyone else went outside. The nurse said she had advanced to five centimeters. The baby was engaged into Bella's pelvis, so the nurse said she was going to get Dr. Bush to come and place some more accurate monitors on the baby. We waited about twenty more minutes, and Dr. Bush arrived. She asked everybody but me to leave the room, and she broke Bella's water. She placed a small tube into Bella's uterus to monitor the contractions and a wire on the baby's scalp to monitor its heartbeats. I asked Dr. Bush how we were doing, and she said that Bella was now six centimeters dilated, and we should be ready to deliver in two to three more centimeters because Meagan was premature. Bella would probably deliver her before she was the whole ten centimeters dilated. Dr. Bush asked how the epidural was doing, and Bella told her she wasn't having any pain. Dr. Bush then took the opportunity to ask us how we were doing.

"We're doing good. We're back together, and we're doing really good. Thank you for asking," Bella said.

"I'm glad to hear it," Dr. Bush said.

"Me, too," I said, taking Bella's hand. I leaned over and kissed her.

Dr. Bush left the room and the others came back in interrupting our kiss.

"Get a room," Alice said.

"This is our room," Bella said, laughing.

We talked for the next hour with Charlie giving me the evil eye every chance he got. I ignored him as best as I could. When the nurse came in to check Bella again, this time we were up to seven centimeters. We were progressing the way they felt that we should. Bella was doing so good that she was able to continue her conversations with the rest of us. She was still on Magnesium Sulfate to make sure she didn't have a seizure, and that made her sleepy, so while her conversation came and went sometimes, she fought to stay awake and insisted we talk to her.

The next hour came and went rather quickly. When the nurse came in, she felt as if Bella was "complete." She decided she was going to call Dr. Bush and see if it was all right if for her to start pushing. Dr. Bush said it was all right, so after emptying the room of the visitors, the nurse put Bella in the proper position in the bed and had her start pushing. She said Bella was doing well as she was starting to move the baby down with each push. She pushed with us for approximately thirty minutes, and then the nurse told Bella not to push anymore and to breathe through the contractions. She called the nurse's station and told them to notify Dr. Bush and the nursery that we were ready to deliver. I was excited but nervous. The nurse started breaking down the bed into a delivery bed. She took off the end of the bed and put up the stirrups. She got Bella positioned in the stirrups and breathed with her while we waited for Dr. Bush to arrive to deliver the baby. The nursery staff arrived and started setting up the equipment for the baby. Five minutes later Dr. Bush arrived. She got dressed in her gown and gloves, and she went to stand in her position. She had Bella start to push again, and within ten more minutes, our daughter was born.

She was taken to the warmer, cleaned off, and given some oxygen to help her pink up. Her breathing was a little bit off, and they helped her breath for a little while, but by the time that Dr. Bush was finished with Bella, Meagan was breathing on her on. They continued to keep her on oxygen because she was still having a little trouble breathing. They put her into an incubator and brought her over to see us. They let us touch her before they took her to the nursery to check her out. We wouldn't be able to keep her in our room, at least for a little while because of her trouble with her breathing, but she was alive. We had a daughter! Bella was doing fine! She had done it! I leaned over and kissed her. Our family was bigger by one.


	27. Chapter 27

Disclaimer – Stephenie Meyers owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.

A special thanks goes out to my beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 27

Going Home

BPOV

My daughter. Meagan Elizabeth Cullen. She was so tiny. Only four pounds and five ounces, but she was beautiful. My nurse put me into a wheelchair and took Edward and me to see her in the intermediate nursery. She was in an incubator because of the fact that she was still having some retractions between her ribs when she breathed in. They had her on oxygen to help her with her breathing, but luckily she didn't need a breathing tube.

Her doctor told us it was common for a premature baby to have slight problems with their breathing, and all in all, she was doing very well. So far, the oxygen was the only thing needed to help with her breathing, and they were quickly weaning her off of that. Her nurses allowed Edward and me to hold her for a little while, and I cried when they put her into my arms.

The fact she was breathing, moving, and crying was overwhelming to me. The nurse asked me if I wanted to try to nurse her, and I said we wanted to try, so she took us into a private room in the nursery and helped me to attempt to nurse for the first time. Meagan seemed to take to nursing like a champ. It was an amazing feeling for her to latch on to my breast and feed from me. I didn't know what to expect, but it was like nothing I've ever felt before.

"Bella, is she hurting you?" Edward asked, reaching up to wipe the tears from my face. "You don't have to nurse. We can bottle feed if it hurts."

"No, it's not hurting. It feels amazing," I told him. "I can't explain it, but it doesn't hurt."

"It looks amazing. You're feeding my daughter, and I couldn't be happier."

"Neither could I. She's perfect."

"You know it. I've never been happier."

"Neither have I, Edward. Thank you for everything."

"I didn't do anything. You did all of the work. You carried her and delivered her, and now you're feeding her. I feel so totally useless."

"No, you're not useless. Believe me. Once we get home, I'm gonna be counting on you to help me with everything." The nurse came back in and told me it was time to switch breasts. She showed me how to unlatch her and how to hold her on the other side so she could latch on again. That side didn't feel as good, and the nurse had to work with me to get her latched on properly. She seemed insatiable. She was so hungry. The nurse said she'd want to nurse every two hours. I didn't know how she could be so hungry.

I finished feeding her, and her nurse came and put her back in her incubator. We went back to my room, and Alice and Jasper were there waiting on us. They were so excited, and wanted to know what took us so long.

"Bella fed Meagan. It went really well," Edward said.

"You mean you nursed her?" Alice asked. "Didn't that hurt?"

"No, not really. It felt funny, but it didn't hurt," I said. "I wanna do what's right for her, and everybody says that nursing is the right thing to do."

"It was amazing," Edward said. "I've never seen anything so sensual in my life."

"Edward, nursing isn't supposed to turn you on," I said.

"No, it didn't turn me on, but it was beautiful. You feeding my daughter was nothing but beautiful. I could watch you feed her every day of forever."

"That would eventually just get gross. She's gonna grow up," Jasper said.

"You know what I mean," Edward said.

"Yeah, I think I do. I don't know firsthand, but I can imagine," Jasper said.

They stayed with us until visiting hours were up, and then they went home. I went every two hours to the nursery to feed Meagan, and she tried to sleep in between feedings. By morning, I was so tired, my eyes were crossing. Dr. Bush came in the room and checked my uterus to see it was staying firm and contracted down so it wouldn't bleed very much. She told me I was supposed to bleed as much as a normal period, but not anymore. She also asked me what we wanted to do for birth control.

"I think we'll go back to using birth control pills. They worked well for us. I'll just have to remember antibiotics can make them ineffective," I said.

"Yeah, that's important to remember," Dr. Bush said. "Have you heard anything about the baby today?"

"No, we haven't been to see her since her last feeding, and her doctor hadn't rounded, yet," Edward said.

"Well, she should be by to see you before too long," Dr. Bush said. "As for you, your lab tests are returning to normal. I'm not going to release you until they have normalized, so hang in there. You may be able to go home tomorrow or the next day."

"Okay, thanks," I said.

"Hi, Mrs. Cullen, Mr. Cullen, Dr. Bush, how are you all doing? I'm Dr. Henderson, your daughter's doctor," a woman said as she came in the door.

"I'm just leaving," Dr. Bush said, and she turned and left the room.

"Your daughter has had some difficulty with her breathing. This is a function of her prematurity. She has been on a small amount of oxygen which we've been tapering over the past day. Right now, she's on room air and doing fine so far. I'm going to keep her in the intermediate nursery for today, but if she does well on room air today, then I'll transfer her to the regular nursery tomorrow, and you'll be able to have her in your room. Do you have any questions?"

"Is there anything else we should expect because of her being premature?" I asked.

"Well, she'll need a shot every month during winter in order to keep her from getting RSV which is a respiratory virus, and your breast feeding is important for her immune system. It will help to protect her from getting sick," Dr. Henderson said.

"Her lungs haven't been damaged, have they?" Edward asked.

"No, she's just small, and her lungs weren't developed all of the way. The steroids you were given did a good job in helping to mature her lungs, but they still weren't completely ready. Hopefully, they'll continue to do well on room air, and she'll be ready to go home soon."

"Are there any side effects from her having to be on the oxygen?" Edward asked.

"Why would there be side effects from oxygen?" I asked.

"Well, the amount of oxygen she's been on hasn't been enough to cause her side effects, but oxygen can cause side effects," Dr. Henderson said.

"That's all the questions I had," Edward said.

"I don't have any more," I said.

"Any time you have any just ask the nursery staff to call me," Dr. Henderson said, and she left.

Edward and I walked down to the nursery. It was time for Meagan to eat again. We knocked on the door, and I told the nurse who answered that it was time to feed my daughter. She said the doctors were rounding, that I'd have to wait.

"Are you trying to tell me I can't feed my daughter? It's time for her to eat, and I wanna feed her. Don't make me call the Chief of Staff," I said.

"There are rules that we can't have visitors in the nursery when the doctors are here," the nurse said.

"I don't care about the rules. I want to feed my daughter. Edward, call your dad. Meagan shouldn't have to wait to eat just because there is a doctor in the nursery," I said.

"I don't wanna have to call Dad because of this. We should be able to feed our daughter despite the fact there are doctors making rounds. She hasn't fed in over two hours, and she is more than likely hungry," Edward said.

"I'm sorry, but that's nursery policy. Why don't you give me your room number, and I'll call you just as soon as the doctors leave?" the nurse said.

"We're in room 321. What's your name?" I asked.

"I'm nurse Holly LaGrone," she said.

We went back to my room, and Edward called Carlisle. He agreed to come to our room. When he arrived, he asked what the problem was.

"The nursery won't let us in to feed Meagan," Edward said.

"Why not?" Carlisle asked.

"Holly, the nurse who answered the door, said the doctors were making rounds and we couldn't go in while they were rounding," Edward said.

"Well, if they're rounding on Meagan then you can't feed her," Carlisle said.

"They're not rounding on her. Her doctor has already come to talk to us today," Edward said.

"Then why can't you go in?" Carlisle asked.

"That's my question," Edward said.

The phone rang, and Holly said we could come and feed Meagan now. Carlisle said he'd walk us to the nursery. When we knocked on the door to the intermediate nursery, Holly answered it.

"Oh, hi Dr. Cullen. How are you this morning?" Holly asked.

"I'm fine, Holly. How are you?" Carlisle asked.

"I'm just fine. What do we owe the honor of your visit?" Holly asked.

"I received a phone call from Edward and Bella saying you wouldn't allow them into the nursery to feed their daughter. I'm sure there was a good reason why they weren't allowed in," Carlisle said.

"Well, Sir, the doctors were rounding in the newborn nursery, and we're not allowed to have visitors in the nursery while the docs are rounding," Holly said.

"But their daughter is in the intermediate nursery. Was anyone rounding in that nursery?" Carlisle asked.

"No, Sir, but the rule is if any doc is in any of the nurseries we're not allowed to have visitors," Holly said.

"Even in the NICU? Someone is almost always rounding in there," Carlisle said.

"The rule stands even for the NICU, but the neonatologists are more lenient. I guess it is because the NICU has its own nurses, and the intermediate and newborn nurseries share nurses," Holly said.

"That would make sense," Carlisle said. "Edward, why don't you and Bella go and feed Meagan while you have a chance. I'll come by and see her a little later."

"If I may ask, how did you get involved in this situation, Dr. Cullen? It's unusual for the Chief of Staff to get involved in patient complaints. It's usually the Head Nurse or one of the other administrators," Holly asked.

"Oh, didn't you know? Edward is my son. Meagan is my granddaughter," Carlisle said.

"No, we didn't know. Congratulations. She is doing very well today, tolerating room air. She should be able to go home tomorrow if all goes well today," Holly said.

I gave Carlisle a hug, and I took Edward by the hand. We walked to Meagan's isolette. She wasn't hooked up to any wires or tubes, and the lid of the isolette was opened. She was lying peacefully. I looked at Holly, and I asked her if I could pick her up. She nodded, and I picked up Meagan. I took her to the nursing room where I sat down and nursed her. She latched on well, and she took to nursing even better than the first time. She was a natural.

After I fed Meagan, Edward and I went to my room. I continued to work on my homework between occasional naps. All day long we followed the same pattern. Edward and I would go feed Meagan, we would come back and do my homework, and I would nap. After school was over, we had some visitors from school. They would sit with us for ten to fifteen minutes, tell us how pretty Meagan was, and then they would leave.

The next morning, Dr. Bush came in and told me that if Meagan could go home, I could as well. If Meagan had to stay, she would allow me to, as well. When Meagan's doctor came in, she told me that Meagan was doing well, and we could take her home. She was doing the paperwork, and we would be able to have her within the next two hours.

When they brought her to our room, we got to dress her for the first time. We also got to change her diaper for the first time, and by we, I mean me. I was so happy, and Edward was beside himself. I packed Meagan's diaper bag with all of the wipes and diapers that were on her isolette. As I packed my own clothes and Edward's clothes, Edward placed Meagan into her car seat. Holly came to our room, and she went over all of Meagan's information. I was nervous that I wouldn't be able to remember everything that she told us, but Edward reassured me I wouldn't be alone. Esme would be there if I needed her.

Carlisle came to see us off. One of the floor nurses came and put me in a wheelchair to take me out of the building. Edward sat Meagan on my lap while he carried all of the bags down to the car. When he got them in the trunk, he came back around, picked up the car seat, and loaded it into the backseat of the car.

I got into the front seat, and Edward drove us home. When we arrived, Edward brought Meagan into the house. I walked into her bedroom, and I looked around. Everything was ready for her, and when Meagan woke up, I fed her. I changed her diaper again, and put her back to sleep in her bed. Then I decided to take a nap. Edward set up the nursery monitor we'd bought, and we both laid down for a nap. It wasn't thirty minutes later when Meagan was up again, ready to eat. Edward got up and went to get her for me. I fed her and Edward changed her diaper. He did really well. He then put her down in her bed, and she went back to sleep.

The rest of the week went pretty much the same way. The only difference was we started giving her a bath which she didn't like, at all. She cried from the first time we got her wet until the moment we got her dressed again. Our Meagan didn't like being naked. It only took a couple of days for my milk to come in full force. I fed her for thirty minutes, fifteen minutes on each breast, but I still had milk left over. We bought a breast pump, and after I finished nursing her, I pumped what milk I had left over and froze it. I would need it for when I went back to school and Esme took over caring for Meagan.

The next week, Edward went back to school. He brought home our homework, and I continued to try to catch up on the weeks of homework and classwork I'd missed. I couldn't believe how much I'd missed. There was no way I'd stay on track for valedictorian having missed so much school, but I had a daughter at home, and I wouldn't trade her for anything.

**A/N – Just in case you don't know, "NICU" stands for Neonatal Intensive Care Unit.**


	28. Chapter 28

Disclaimer – Stephenie Meyers owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.

A special thanks goes out to my beta, shelikesthesound.

Chapter 28

Valedictorian

EPOV

I hated leaving Bella and Meagan at home, but I had to get back to school. It was hard to pay attention, wondering what my two girls were doing while I was gone. I was a hopeless cause. Not only was I exhausted from being up all night with Meagan, but I couldn't stop thinking about her. She was perfect. I missed her every second I was away from her. Several girls came up to me while Bella was away, a couple of them asking me out. I flat refused to even speak to any of them. They knew I had a new baby at home, and I couldn't believe the lack of tact they were showing. If Bella got wind of their attempts to seduce me, it would be bad. I hung out with Jasper and Alice, and they were very excited about everything I told them about Meagan. They had avoided coming over to give Bella and me time to get adjusted to having Meagan at home.

I stayed late to go to baseball practice for the first time since Meagan was born, and Coach was glad to see me back.

"Congratulations, Edward. I hear your daughter has finally arrived," he said.

"Yes, Sir. Meagan is here and doing very well. She's not sleeping all night yet, and we're tired," I said.

"Yes, that's part of it, definitely part of it. I remember those days well. I wouldn't wish them on anyone, especially someone who's still in high school," Coach said.

"Well, I'm making the best of it. I wouldn't trade it for the world. She is so worth it. I didn't know how much I would love her. I mean, I loved Victoria, and I'm very sorry we lost her, but the love I feel for Meagan…it's like no other."

"I've never lost a child, but I have three of my own and five grandchildren, so I know the love you're talking about. It is amazing."

"Yes, Sir. It truly is."

"Now, let's get to practice," Coach said.

We practiced until dark, and then I headed home to my girls. When I walked in, Bella had supper ready, and Meagan was asleep in her crib. I walked up to my wife and took her into my arms.

"I love you," I said. I leaned in and kissed her. She returned my kiss and wrapped her arms around my waist.

"Are you hungry?" she asked. I nodded. "Do you wanna eat now, or do you want your shower first?"

"I wanna shower first. Do you wanna join me?" I asked.

"We really shouldn't. What if Meagan wakes up?" she asked.

"Is it time for her to wake up?" I asked.

"No, not really," she said.

"Then let's both get a shower," I said. "We may not get another chance."

"I don't know, Edward. I think one of us should be aware of Meagan."

"Okay, you go first then. I know you haven't had a chance to get a shower yet. You deserve time to yourself."

"Thank you. I'll do that. I'd love a shower." She walked to the bedroom and into the bathroom. I followed her into the bathroom and watched as she got undressed. She was still as beautiful as ever. I stopped her before she stepped into the shower. I started kissing her again. I took the kisses deeper, and she responded to me. I held her in my arms.  
>"Edward, we've gotta stop. We're not supposed to make love until my post-partum visit. That's another five weeks away," she said.<p>

"Come on, Bella. You know that no one listens to that rule. I want you. I've been away from you all day, and for a while before that because of your bedrest. I need you," I said.

"But we're not protected. Dr. Bush hasn't started me on my birth control pills because she wanted my milk to come in good before she started them. Do you have a condom?"

"No, I don't, but you haven't ovulated yet. You just had Meagan. You haven't had time to ovulate, yet. Please, Bella. I need you tonight."

"No, it's too dangerous. I don't want another baby this soon. I'm tired, Edward. I just need a hot shower and to eat supper before Meagan wakes up and needs to be fed again. I'm not in the mood to make love, even if it were safe. Please, don't look at me that way, Edward." She giggled as I ran my hands over her hips and down to her nether region. "Please Edward, I'm really not in the mood." She sighed and shifted her legs to give my hand better access to where it wanted to go.

"Your voice says one thing, but your body says something else entirely," I said as I continued to pleasure her with my hand. She stepped closer to me, and her lips found mine again. She soon had her tongue inside my mouth doing battle with mine for dominance. I slipped the rest of her clothes off, and then I made short work of my own. I lifted her and carried her to the bed in our room where I continued to make love to her. She was thoroughly responsive to me, crying out my name when she reached her climax. I soon followed with my own, and we held each other for several minutes before I broke us apart.

"Why don't you go get that shower now. I'll listen for Meagan while you're in there," I told her. She barely acknowledged that I'd said anything, instead rolling over into a little ball and falling asleep. I got up and covered up my girl, and then I took a really quick shower. When I finished, I came back into the bedroom to get dressed. Bella was still asleep; she hadn't moved a muscle. I gently pulled the door to the bedroom shut after turning off the baby monitor in the bedroom. Then I went into Meagan's room to check on her, and she was still sleeping soundly. I left the door cracked and headed back to the living room where I ate and then started on my homework.

No longer than thirty minutes later, I heard Meagan starting to move around a bit. I got up and went to her room. I got her out of her crib, and telling her that daddy loved her, I changed her diaper and brought her to the front of the house. I knew it was time for her to eat, but I wanted for Bella to sleep, so I got one of the packages of breast milk that Bella had pumped and thawed it out. Then I put it into a bottle, and I fed my daughter for the first time. It was amazing to watch her eat, and she was difficult to burp, but we managed. We had a great bonding experience, she and I, and we talked the whole time that she ate. After she finished eating I sat her up on my knees, and we talked some more. Then she did her business again. This time it was a stinky diaper. Who knew that babies could fill up a diaper that full? We handled it, though. It took us quite a few diaper wipes, but Meagan eventually got clean, and we didn't have to resort to a bath to do it.

After her clean diaper, we went back up front, and we rocked in the rocking chair for a few minutes. She fell asleep rather quickly, so I got up and put her back in her bed. I covered her with her blanket, and then I went back up front and got back to work on my homework. I was ecstatic I was able to take care of Meagan without Bella's help for the first time. Daddy was able to manage with daddy's girl just fine. No harm, no foul, and mommy got to sleep for the first time since Meagan was born for any length of time at all. I was glad I could do that for her.

Several hours later, Bella woke up. When she looked at the clock, she came running into the living room. "Why did you turn off the monitor? I didn't hear Meagan when she woke up."

"I took care of her, sweetheart. You needed the rest," I told her.

"How did you feed her?"

"I thawed out one of the milk packages you had frozen. She tolerated it just fine."

"Those were for when I have to go back to school."

"And for when Daddy needs to feed our girl."

"My boobs hurt. What time did you feed her?"

"About seven o'clock, maybe seven twenty."

"Well, she's gonna need to eat soon. I can't believe I slept through a feeding. What kind of mother am I?"

"A sleepy mother. You've been going strong since she was born. You needed a break."

"Maybe, but I need to feed her or my boobs are gonna explode," she laughed.

Just then, as if she were listening to our conversation, Meagan began to cry. Bella ran to her bedroom and picked her up. She brought her to the front of the house. She sat down beside me and started nursing. "Oww, this hurts."

"I'm sorry. I thought I was helping by letting you sleep," I said.

"It's just so full. It's hard for her to latch on properly."

"Is it letting down all right?"

"No, I think I'm engorged."

"Let me get you a hot towel. Maybe that will help." I got a warm towel, and we wrapped it around Bella's boob which finally started getting softer. Meagan kept sputtering on the milk as if she were getting too much at a time. We finally decided to pump the milk and let Meagan drink it from a bottle for this feeding. It was amazing how much milk Bella had stored because she had skipped one feeding. Lesson learned. Don't skip feedings. We finally got the milk pumped and Meagan fed. We got Meagan changed and back to sleep, and Bella got back to work on her catch up work.

Bella was planning on going in to school for the first part of the next day to take some of the tests she'd missed during the time she was in the hospital. Mom would be keeping Meagan while we were both gone. I knew Mom would do a great job taking care of her, but I could tell Bella didn't want to leave her, even for a couple of hours.

The next morning we got up and got dressed. Bella was able to wear her pre-pregnancy clothes already. Bella made sure to nurse Meagan right before Mom got here, and ever so reluctantly, she turned Meagan over to Mom who was delighted to be babysitting. When the time came for us to leave, Bella had tears in her eyes. Mom pushed us out of the door, and we climbed into our car. Bella hadn't left Meagan since she had been home, and I knew it would be hard on her. Hell, it was still hard on me.

We made it to school with a few minutes to spare. We went to first period together as Bella was taking an exam in that room. Mrs. Ross handed Bella the exam after telling her how wonderful she looked. Then she went on with the next section for the class. Bella finished the exam before the class was over, and she turned it in. Mrs. Ross excused her to go to her next exam. I mouthed "good luck" and "I love you" to her as she left the classroom. She just nodded at me. When the bell rang, I went to my second period class, and Bella was already in the room taking her second exam of the morning. She didn't look up when I entered the room, and I took my seat beside her. She finished the exam by the time we were halfway through the worksheet we were assigned for the day. Bella tapped on my desk as she got up to turn in the exam, and once more, I told her I loved her as she left the room. She went on to our third period class to take her third exam of the day. When the bell rang for morning break, she was nowhere to be found. We had hoped she would be finished by now, but obviously she wasn't.

"How is Bella doing?" Jasper asked.

"She doesn't wanna be here," I said.

"How long will she be here?" Alice asked.

"Until lunch. She has another test to go after this one," I said.

"She must be fit to be tied," Alice said.

"Yeah, it's time to feed Meagan. She must be getting uncomfortable," I said.

"Bummer," Alice said.

"Yeah, it hurts for her to skip feedings," I said.

"What, talking about me behind my back?" Bella asked.

"Hey, sweetheart, how did you do?" I asked.

"Okay. They were easy. None were discussion. I was surprised," Bella said.

"One to go," I said.

"Yeah, one to go. Chemistry. Then I get to wait around an hour for you to take me home."

"Why don't you just take the car? Then you and Meagan can come and get me after practice," I said.

"You don't mind? That would be great! I could get back to Meagan an hour sooner!" Bella said.

"Of course I don't mind. You go ahead. Here are the keys."

"Thanks, Edward. I love you, so much. I can't stand being away from her."

"I know. I miss her, too. You go home to our girl. Just don't forget to come pick me up," I said.

"We won't. We'll be here. We promise."

"Okay. Tell her Daddy said, 'Hi,'" I said.

The bell rang, and I walked her to the chemistry room, then I went on to my third period room. I wouldn't admit it to anyone, but I was jealous. Bella got to stay home with Meagan, and I had to return to school. I know she just gave birth, and she would be able to be out six weeks until her post-partum check up, but I wanted to be out with our daughter as well. I didn't want to be stuck at school when Bella got to be at home with our girl. It didn't seem fair.

By the end of the day, I was fit to be tied. I wanted to go home so badly I was missing balls that were hit to me, balls that should've been easy outs. Finally, Coach called me on it.

"Cullen, are you even here today?" he yelled after I let the third ball run under my glove.

"Yes, Coach," I yelled back.

"You owe me three laps. Take them now. The rest of you, bring it in," Coach said. I started running my laps. I knew I owed them. My mind was on Meagan. I was ready to see her. I needed to see her. Who knew being a father would change me so much? I certainly didn't.

When I finished with my third lap, Coach called us all together. We had a game the next night. He gave us our starters, and though I didn't deserve it after today's practice, I was starting at shortstop. We would be playing at home, so we wouldn't be having practice after school the next afternoon. We were expected to be at the field at six thirty for the seven o'clock game.

When he dismissed us, I turned around and saw Bella sitting in the stands with Meagan. I rushed out of the dugout and ran up to them. Meagan was asleep in her car seat. Several of the guys followed me over to Bella and Meagan. They crowed around Meagan and cooed at her. I warned them not to wake her up, but they couldn't be quiet. She woke up and immediately started to cry. Bella picked her up and held her close. I wanted to hold her, but I was in dirty clothes and hadn't had a shower. I was sweaty, too. I wouldn't hold her until I was clean.

"Okay, look at what you clowns did. You woke her up. I'm sorry, Bella. How long had she been asleep?" I asked.

"About an hour. She should go back to sleep," Bella said, rocking Meagan.

"Well, are you ready to go home?" I asked.

"Ready, willing, and able," she said. She got up, still carrying Meagan, and I got the car seat. We walked towards the car. I put the car seat in the back of the car, and Bella laid Meagan in it. Then Bella got in up front. I drove us home.

The next night, I tried to get Bella to come to the game and let Mom babysit again, but she said, "No."

We won by a score of seven to three. When I got back home, I found Bella pacing the floor with Meagan in her arms, crying. Bella had tears running down her face.

"What's wrong?" I asked Bella.

"I don't know. She's been crying for the better part of an hour. I can't get her to be quiet. I've changed her diaper; I've fed her; I've put her down; I've walked her. Nothing has worked."

"Let me get a shower, and I'll take her for a little while. You need to rest." I went to get my shower. When I came out, I took Meagan and sat down in the rocking chair. I held her close to me and began rocking her. She continued to cry. I rocked her for thirty minutes, and she finally stopped crying and fell asleep. I continued to rock her. She slept against my chest for two more hours before she woke up. I went back to wake up Bella so she could feed Meagan, and her eyes were red and swollen. Bella got up and came into the living room where she took Meagan and started to nurse her. While she nursed her, she started crying again.

"Bella, why are you crying?" I asked.

"I didn't know what to do. I'm not a good mother. She was crying, and I couldn't get her to stop," Bella said.

"That doesn't mean you're not a good mother. It means she was crying. Sometimes babies cry. There wasn't anything wrong with her. She just had her first temper tantrum. You shouldn't feel bad."

"I should have known what to do, and I didn't. I don't think I can be a mother," Bella said.

"You are a wonderful mother," I said. "I wouldn't want anyone else to be Meagan's mother."

"You're just saying that," Bella said.

"No, I'm not. You're a great mother. You're doing great with her. You're taking care of her when I can't be here. All you need is a break. Why don't you go visit Alice tomorrow night, and I'll take care of her."

"You mean it? I don't know if I can leave her or not."

"Then have Alice over here, and Jasper and I'll take care of her. You and Alice can hang out. I've been missing her while I'm at school. I'd love the chance to take care of her!"

"You're an angel! That would be great! I'll do it!"

The next night went great! I got to sit with my little girl, and Bella and Alice got to have some time together. Meagan behaved great, and Jasper and I had the time of our lives. Well, I did, anyway. My daughter meant the world to me, and I couldn't get enough of her.

Several weeks later, Bella started back to school. We left Meagan with Mom, and I think Bella was secretly happy to be back to being a little normal. Everyone welcomed her back. We were down to the last few weeks of school, and she had finally caught up with the rest of us. She had done well on all of her make up work, and she was still in the running for valedictorian.

The announcement would be held the week after finals ― the following week. Meagan was almost two months old now, and she was staying up more. We were studying as much as possible, and Mom offered to stay late so we could study. We were thankful for the extra time Mom volunteered to put in, but we decided Meagan was our responsibility, so we would take care of her.

We both did well on our finals, and the following Monday was awards day. It was the last day for Seniors to attend class, and we could actually leave after the awards ceremony. Each class gave an award to the student with the highest average in that class. Bella won the awards for AP English, Government, and Economics. I won the award for AP Calculus, AP Biology, AP Chemistry, and Spanish. Then it was time to announce the valedictorian. I held Bella's hand as Mr. Green came to the podium.

"Our final Senior awards are Salutatorian and Valedictorian. First your class Salutatorian. This person has worked especially hard this year to keep their grades up. Your class Salutatorian, Bella Cullen." I stood and clapped. Bella looked at me, and with tears in her eyes, she walked down to the podium and took her medal.

"Thank you, Mr. Green," Bella said. "I don't believe it."

"You did really well, considering how much school you missed," Mr. Green said. "And now, as if anyone has any doubt, your class Valedictorian is Edward Cullen."

I got up and walked down to the podium where Mr. Green presented me with my medal. I had done it. I had achieved my goal. I had my daughter. I had my wife. I had been through hell this year, but in the end, love had survived.

**A/N – Thank you for staying with me for this ride. I've enjoyed reading your reviews and corresponding with you. This brings the story of Edward and Bella to an end. I have considered a third installment, but I haven't worked out the storyline to a point where I could even begin writing it at this point. I have, however, begun writing a sequel to my second story, "Edward's Anatomy". It will be a while until it's ready to post, so if you're interested, please make sure to read EA first. Until then, have a great holiday season and a wonderful new year.**

**Thanks again for tagging along,**

**Tammy**


	29. Chapter 29 - sequel notice

Can Love Survive

I'm posting this to let you know I've started the sequel. It's titled, "Undying Love." I'm sorry it's taken this long, but real life has been kind of crazy as of late. I hope you enjoy.


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